I Promise You
by Awkwardauthor
Summary: Love is patient. Love is endurance. Love is everlasting. Twins Phil and Fiona Lester made a promise when they were young to never let love come between them. When a new boy named Dan comes into their lives, their sibling bond will be tested by betrayals, an affair, and if a true heart's desire can withstand any obstacle that life throws. AU Phan, Zalfie, and other surprise pairings
1. Cupcakes and a Promise

**Disclaimer (I'll do one for the hell of it): I do not own Dan, Phil, and every other YouTuber featured in the story. This is a work of fiction, and the only thing I own is the plot and a copy of TABINOF. Let's face it, I'd want Phan to be an RL ship screwing each other behind closed doors by now… I mean, holding hands and saying "I love you" to each other all the time. [This is one of the weirdest disclaimers to hit the internet. Do me a favor and just read the story.]**

Haiku

 _The world is cruel_

 _But I'm always here for you_

 _So just take my hand_

* * *

Chapter 1: Cupcakes and a Promise

Shouting. Screaming. Hate. The palms of a 7-year-old girl with long glossy raven-colored hair and ice blue eyes presses against her ears in an attempt to block the noise. But it's no use. The four white walls with chipped-off paint isn't enough to eliminate the agitation that pounds against her chest. Her eardrums can still hear the spiteful words spewing out of the adults' mouths.

 _ **"YOU DIDN'T PAY THE ELECTRIC BILLS AGAIN?"**_

 _ **"It was supposed to be your turn! And now you're blaming me again?"**_

 _ **"I didn't have time! You know that if I can't take care of it, you have to."**_

 ** _"No, that's your bullshit excuse for forgetting the deadline!"_**

She whimpers, pressing her face against the pillow. Her breaths are raspy. She feels as if someone's foot is stepping harshly against her chest. The uncomfortable sensation catches her off guard, only occurring on the nights when her parents are fighting.

"Shhh…" a gentle male voice soothes. The heat from another body makes contact with the bare skin of her forearms. She sits up, then leans her head against her brother's shoulder. Shallow breaths slowly start to return to normal breaths. The simple presence of her brother helps to draw her panic attacks away. When she's by herself, it takes minutes, maybe even hours, for her to recover from her panic attacks. She dislikes hearing her mom and dad fight. When they are mad at each other, she's terrified that their anger will literally bring the house down. She's scared that one day, their anger will reach a peak that will force her and her brother apart.

"Don't mind them, Fi. They're adults. They can handle this on their own."

She lifts her head, looking at his concerned blue eyes. His consistent calmness never ceases to amaze her. She knows that her brother is just as affected by their parents' constant fighting as she is, yet he doesn't have panic attacks like she does. "How do you do it, Phil? How are you not bothered by them?"

His arms wraps around her slim body, pulling her closer to him. "I hate it too. But remember what Martyn told us? 'Be strong. Suck it up.'"

"That's Martyn. He's an idiot." Her lip trembles. Her mind surfaces a scenario of her dad telling her that they are divorcing, that he and her mom decided for her to go with her father while her mom takes care of her brother. "I'm scared."

"What are you scared of?"

Her lip trembles. "That movie… The Parent Trap. What if mommy and daddy get divorced and they choose to separate us? I don't want you to go away. I don't want to lose you."

She can't bear the thought of never seeing Phil again. Being apart from him is the searing pain of a sunburn. She sunbathed at the beach for too long last month for forgetting to apply sunscreen. She was ashamed and in pain as she went home, regretting that she didn't remember to do a small action that was important for her skin's health.

Phil isn't merely her twin. He's her best friend. He's everything to her. He's the only one that she can go to during their parents' major arguments. They also have their older brother, Martyn, for sibling comfort, though heeding to Martyn's advice is useless. As their older brother by four years, Martyn has more years and a little more maturity to handle their parents' problems.

"They won't get separated," he assures her. "They'll work it out. We're always gonna be together. I won't let them take you away from me."

"But-"

"You're my sister, Fiona. Don't dwell on the negative. Look at the positive. Life is not a Disney fairytale. Marriages aren't perfect. No one is perfect. Mom and dad love each other. They won't give up on their marriage."

"What if they do?"

"They won't."

"How are you so sure of that?" The parents of her best friends, Louise and Zoe, don't behave in that way. She's envious of their clean-cut families. What happened between her parents that caused them to feel hate for one another instead of love? Her parents are supposed to care for each other, have an undying love like a prince has for his princess.

"I'm not. But if I have enough hope, mom and dad will have their HEA."

"HEA?"

"Happily-ever-after."

HEA. Can her parents be the prince and princess in their Disney story? Do they have the love that they vowed "from life until death?" Fights aren't healthy for a marriage, so what does true love mean if her parents don't seem to have it?

* * *

~:~

* * *

The park is inhabited by several people and the occasional passerby in mid-afternoon on a Saturday. Blades of tall grass tickles the ankles of a young child. A 7-year-old boy with ruffled raven hair and ice blue eyes pauses his footsteps. He turns around, watching his twin sister struggling to catch up to him.

The little girl huffs. Despite being a great sprinter, her twin brother is the one with longer limbs that can endure runs at greater distances. "You're too fast. Now why did you make me come here?"

He grabs her hand. "Come." With her still panting, they take off on a walk instead of a run. The twins walk a little further until they reach one of the tallest trees in the park. He points to the words etched on the tree's bark at their eye level. "What do you see?"

She squints her eyes, reading the words that he scratched onto the tree's bark earlier in the day with a dagger that he snuck away from his father's toolshed. "Fiona Mikayla and Phillip Michael Lester." She spins her head to face her brother. "I don't get it. Why did you put our names here."

"Because." He looks her square in the eye. "I want you to remember that no matter what happens to mom and dad, there will always be a place for you and I to stay together. If we're ever torn apart, the tree is a symbol that even if we grow apart, we are siblings forever."

She grins. She loves it when he does sentimental things for her. The effort that he puts into every surprise is worth it if means seeing her face light up. When his sister is happy, he's happy too. "You did this for me?"

"Of course. You've been so worried about mom and dad. I needed some way to help you understand that the love between us will stay and never go away. I love you, Fiona." Nothing can defeat the heartwarming love that he has for his sister. He'll do anything for her. Take a bullet, catch a grenade, give up a kidney, etcetera. His twin is one of his best friends. He's blessed that he was born with a kind, sweet sibling.

"Thank you Phil." She wraps her arms tightly around his waist. "I love you too."

He pats her shoulders. Suddenly, an idea crosses his mind. It's genius. As long as they are here, there's something else that they can do that will make his surprise even more memorable. "You know what we should do?"

She gazes at him with curiosity. "What?"

"Make a promise." Lester promises are their thing. It's their way of swearing to each other that they'll absolutely fulfill what it is that they wish to accomplish.

"What kind of promise?" She lets go of him and takes a step back. She raises one of her hands, directing her pinky finger at him.

"This." He mirrors her motion. "Let's promise that we'll never let love come between us. When we fall in love, no matter what happens, we put each other first. There are plenty of fish in the sea, but I only have one twin." He reaches his pinkie out to her. "Pinky swear?"

She doesn't hesitate with her answer. "Pinky swear."

They hook their pinkies. Their Lester promise about undying love is how it all begins. It's what will bring them closer, but will also someday be broken and tear them apart.

* * *

~:~

* * *

The mall is lined with shoppers entering and exiting high-maintenance stores. A woman in a fur coat enters a Dior store. A boy carries two Victoria's Secret's bags for a girl, his face contorted in an annoyed expression on his face. A group of teens sit at a fountain sipping iced coffee from the mall's Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf café. Then there's Dan Howell, a 12-year-old boy sitting on a bench with a middle-aged adult sitting down next to the lanky pre-teen, reading today's newspaper.

Dan flickers his gaze at the mall's stores around him. His brain racks for a source of inspiration. Mother's Day is in three days, and he has absolutely no idea what to give to his mother. Now that he's getting older, his homemade cards are not appropriate for an oversized adolescent. He's one more year away from going to high school. Becoming a teenager will mean leaving behind his childish gift ideas.

The brown-haired boy is running out of options. His last resort is to buy something. He has enough allowance and babysitting money saved to afford an off-the-counter necklace, earrings, or any piece of jewelry. Or a ceramic figure from the homeware selection in Macy's. But a store-bought item wouldn't have the same type of love compared to an item crafted from his own hands. His gifts come from the heart. Once a price tag is attached to a gift, the gift is without the genuine love that it's supposed to have.

"Bro! This is heavy. Why did we buy so much?"

"It's better to be safe than sorry, Fi."

Dan looks around. He notices a boy and a girl with black hair and sky blue eyes walk out of Macy's, who seem to be about the same age range as him. The two kids are carrying several shopping bags in their hands. Dan watches as they stop walking to exchange bags with each other.

"What are we carrying? Rocks?" the girl complains. She takes a TJ Max bag from the boy. "I sure hope the casserole will be delicious."

"It has to be." The boy blows at the hair that dangles over his eyes. He balances the handles from the bags over his arms and adjusts his fringe. "Dinner made by us will be the perfect gift for mom."

"But we've never cooked for her. We might burn the house down." The girl puts the bags down on the ground. She flexes her arms. "Do we have any more stops?"

"Nope."

"Thank fucking god." She finishes her stretching and picks up the bags. "Since our culinary skills can't cook anything beside eggs and bacon, we gotta know how to wield a knife before we even come close to an oven."

"Sis." He helps her gather the bags back into her hands. "We may be amateur cooks, but I don't think we're that terrible to set the house on fire."

"I don't know. Martyn came awfully close when he left the stove on while frying pancakes for dad's birthday."

"That was his fault for not paying attention to what he was doing."

Watching the siblings' conversation, Dan thinks that it's nice of them to make dinner for their mother on Mother's Day. It's a selfless idea. Some of the boys that he knows from his middle school aren't the kind of people to do things for their parents without expecting something in return. The siblings' idea is original. Creative. With all the bags that the girl is carrying, he has a hunch that they are cooking more than a casserole. They might be planning to cook a full-course meal.

"Maybe I should cook for mom," Dan mutters to himself. He's an amateur cook at best, but cooking involves making something with his hands. And he knows how to bake. He helps his grandmother make cookies whenever he drops by to visit his grandparents.

His mom likes cupcakes. His dad always purchases a dozen of red velvet cupcakes for their anniversaries. If he knows how to bake cookies, then surely he can use what he knows to try to make cupcakes.

He reaches into his pocket and takes out his phone. He inputs _**red velvet cupcake recipe**_ into Google's search box.

He grins. _Mom, get ready for my sweet surprise._

* * *

~:~

* * *

The three days leading to Mother's Day consists of floured hands, a messy kitchen, and two disposed trays of the sweet tooth dessert. With the help of Dan's younger brother Adrian, whose eager volunteering taught the 7-year-old Howell child how to bake cupcakes alongside Dan, they were successful at producing a presentable batch. If Dan had done it alone, it would have probably taken him beyond three days to produce a decent tray.

Their third batch was made on the day before Mother's Day. Both of their parents were at work, allowing them the time and privacy to do the recipe again. Their joint gift was something that they wanted to surprise their dad with too since they'd be baking enough for the entire family to consume. And maybe it was also a small excuse for Dan to use the cupcakes as an advanced Father's Day gift at the same time.

By the evening of Mother's Day, Dan was certain about one thing: he's not going into culinary for his future career.

The boys' mother gasps when Dan and Adrian opened the refrigerator and they carried the tray of red velvet cupcakes to the dinner table.

"Surprise!"

The brothers place the frozen tray on the table. In tears, she picks up a cupcake with the words 'BEST MOM EVER' (one of Adrian's creations) written on white store-bought frosting (Dan was too lazy to make the frosting himself). "Oh boys." She peels back the red paper cup and takes a bite. "This is delicious! You made these yourself?"

"It was Dan's idea," Adrian says. "Mommy, I had so much fun making those and now I wanna be a chef when I grow up."

"It's all thanks to Delia Smith," Dan tells her sheepishly. Their dad talks highly about Delia Smith's recipes, so when Dan found one of her cupcake recipes online, he didn't hesitate to use it.

Their dad chuckles. "You can't go wrong with Delia Smith."

Their mom puts her bitten cupcake back on the tray. She moves around the table and gives them a hug. "I love you, Daniel and Adrian."

"Love you too mommy!" Adrian chirps, falling into his mom's embrace.

"What he said," Dan seconds, laughing.

He wonders how Mother's Day is going for the siblings that he saw at the mall. Did they accomplish in making their casserole? Their mother is lucky to have them as children. He imagines their family sitting at a round table, chattering amicably about how delicious the dinner that they made is. They too must be celebrating the parental holiday in joy.

He's grateful to have a loving family. He has a caring mother, an attentive brother, and a non-spoiled, energetic little brother. His family is perfect. What more can he ask for?

 _Thank you, whatever your names are._ Dan thinks as Adrian and his parents start to chow down on the cupcakes. _Now let's see if Delia Smith has a cookie recipe that I can do for Christmas._

* * *

 **So this is my first ever multi-chaptered Dan and Phil fic. How am I doing so far? My goal is to make this one of the most different phanfics to hit the phandom fanfiction world. I wanted this story to have multiple perspectives, multiple pairings, and multiple events going on at once. Aside from Phan, there'll be Zalfie as well as other pairings that'll be introduced as the story rolls along. And yes, I tagged Smosh into the fic because Ian and Anthony will be involved later. ;)**

 **The format of the story will be like a teleserye (Filipino TV show). There's gonna be a lot of romance, drama, friendships, humor, betrayals, one-liners, and memorable moments. So if you like to watch teleseryes (or foreign dramas in general, because I had a lot of classmates in high school addicted to Korean dramas), this story is for you. This story will be roughly around 30+ chapters, and as of today, I have about 20 or so chapters pre-typed.**

 **I'll also be inserting haikus I came up with myself to match the tone for a chapter. Fanfics usually do that with songs, so I thought this would be my way of breaking the norm.**

 **The title of the story is inspired by a Filipino song called Pangako Sa Yo (which means I Promise You) by Rey Valera. I recommend listening to the Vina Morales version, because it's the most popularized version of the song. There's also a Daniel Padilla version if you want to listen to an acoustic version of it. And now that I realize it, Daniel Padilla's initials are DP… get it? DP? Dan and Phil? *crickets* Damn I'm still bad with puns.**

 **I'll be updating twice a week, and Ch. 2 shall be coming on Wednesday or Thursday.**

 **Reviews will mean a whole lot to me. I'd love to know what ya'll think!**

 **~ AA**


	2. Foundations and a Crush

Chapter 2: Foundations and a Crush

Haiku

 _Life begins anew_

 _Change comes unexpectedly_

 _So keep your eyes peeled_

* * *

A 16-year-old brunette boy with dark brown eyes walks through the front gate of his new high school. Students that mingle at the front gate stare at the tall boy. Girls are whispering to their friends about how cute he is. Boys are wondering who this student is. On the first day of a new school year, the population of 11th graders will be increased by one.

"First day of hell," Dan grumbles. "Let's get this over with."

Out of every lucky thing that has ever happened to Dan, moving to a new house and transferring to a new high school tops the list. Moving to an unfamiliar city wasn't on his agenda for the year. He didn't have any close friends at his hometown, though the same couldn't be said about Adrian, who has a couple of best friends and was livid about the job transfer.

Dan's dad deserved to quit at his old law firm. Working long hours at the company chewed a lot of time away from Dan, Adrian, and their mom. But while their mom works as a web designer and can take her work anywhere in the world, Dan and Adrian got the bittersweet end of the move. While the move is a perfect opportunity for Dan to start fresh and find friends, his main weakness is talking to strangers. Because he'll be at another high school for the last two years of his teenage life, making new friends will be a challenge. He hopes that his sarcasm won't offend anyone that tries to talk to him. He doesn't want to leave a bad first impression on the first day. He doesn't want to be the target for whoever the bullies of the school are.

After mindlessly strolling around the campus for a few minutes, he manages to find the school's main office. He takes a deep breath, then opens the door. At the office's front desk, a middle-aged woman with short blonde hair is filing paperwork into a cabinet.

He clears his throat. "Hi. I'm Daniel Howell. I'm a new student."

The woman looks up. She nods at him. "Ah, yes. I was expecting you. Please sit down. I'll be with you in a moment."

"Okay." He drops his backpack onto the floor and goes to sit on one of the empty chairs.

Today is going to be a long day.

* * *

~:~

* * *

On the lunch period of the first day of school, three 11th graders are sitting at a table several feet away from the cafeteria. A large tree looms over their heads, providing enough shade to shield them from direct sunlight. Along with their other friends, the table has been theirs since their freshman year. It's where they eat lunch and meet up in the morning and after school. The beauty of their semi-popularity is how they don't have to deal with being bullied by under and upper classmen.

A girl with long raven hair tied in a high ponytail and blue eyes is talking to a girl with wavy strawberry blonde hair. A boy with the same hair shade and eye color as the raven-haired girl is listening to the two girls' conversation while taking bites of school-served food. To the boy, it's surreal to finally be a junior. Being a junior means that it's the first time that he can attend prom. However, it also means harder classes and more late night studying.

"Louise, next time you go to Paris, please take me with you," the raven-haired girl begs to her best friend. "I wanna have a croissant at the place that invented it."

"Awww… Fiona," The strawberry blonde girl says. "Of course I will. I'll take you, Phil, and everyone else. I missed you guys very much while I was gone."

During summer break, the Pentlands took a family trip to Paris to attend a wedding of one of Louise's cousins. France happens to be one of Fiona's dream vacation destinations (the other is South Korea). Phil had to deal with several nights of seemingly endless chatter between Fiona and Louise on the phone or Skype as Louise gave Fiona updates about her trip, so as soon as Louise came back, Phil made a mental reminder to take Fiona to France one day when he has the money to afford a grand vacation. He doesn't want his twin sister to wait until her honeymoon to experience traveling to the European country.

"Who's going to Paris?" A boy with light brown hair and sky blue eyes chimes, carrying his lunch tray to the table where Phil, Fiona, and Louise are. "Can I come too?"

"Hey Joe," Fiona greets the boy. "And duh. If Louise goes, we all go."

"Oh yeah!" Joe sits down across from Louise. "How was your trip to France?"

"Simply amazing." As Louise fills in on Joe about her vacation in France over the summer, the four teens are joined by the rest of their friends: Zoe Sugg, Joe's older sister by two years, PJ Liguori, and Alfie Deyes, who arrive carrying their own tray of lunches. With today being Joe's first official day of high school, the friends have been giving him tips on how to survive the day. They learned their lessons about how to navigate through their first two years of high school and are passing their wisdom down to their younger friend.

"By the way, have you guys met the new kid yet?" PJ brings up once Louise finishes sharing her Paris adventures. It was the main piece of gossip that spread like wildfire among the junior class. Apparently, the new student is quite a catch for the ladies.

"I had him for calculus in first period," Zoe replies. "His name is Daniel. I hope you guys don't mind, but I invited him to eat lunch with us."

The clique of seven don't often ask people outside their group to eat lunch with them. They've known each other since elementary school, so it's difficult for them to find students that fit their mold. They have semi-popularity because they made being a nerd cool. They are idolized by the underclassmen and even some upperclassmen. Whenever the nerds see the group, they long to be just like them.

"So he's coming?" Phil questions. He has yet to catch a glimpse of this new student. Whoever he is, he must have left a great impression on Zoe for her to ask him to join them.

"Any minute now." Zoe looks over Alfie's shoulder. "Speaking of Daniel, I see him now." She stands up and waves enthusiastically. "Hey Daniel! Over here!"

Phil stops eating and looks up. A tall brunette boy is walking to their table. He's wearing a red and black checkered plaid long-sleeved top, dark wash jeans, and black Converse shoes. He waves back at Zoe when he reaches their table. Phil immediately understands why Zoe wants to take him under their wing. The boy's wardrobe choice matches their taste in clothing.

"Hello," Daniel greets. "It's nice to meet you. You can call me Dan."

The rest of the group voice their own greetings to the new student. Zoe then points to each of them, introducing every individual by name. Once she completes the introduction, Phil smiles warmly at Dan. He can sense the shy vibe that the brunette boy is giving off. He too acted in a similar fashion when he first met PJ in preschool.

"Dan, come sit by me." Phil takes his backpack and binder away from the empty space next to him. Dan nods, walking around Phil's friends and taking a seat to Phil's left.

The group resumes their conversation. The topic switches from Louise's trip to stories of what they did during summer break. While Louise was on vacation, the rest of the group got summer jobs. Fiona and Phil were hired to work part-time at Leroy's VG, their favorite video game store (otherwise known to them as geek heaven). PJ and Alfie were hired to work at an ice cream shop called Lilly's Sweet Delights that the group frequently spend their weekends and after school hours at. And Joe and Zoe helped around their parents' electronics shop by working as cashiers.

Joe smirks toward PJ. "Wait, so you and Christy are a thing?" Everyone except Phil has had at least one crush on one of their classmates. For PJ, it's Christy, who he liked since 6th grade when they had their first kiss with each other during a game of spin the bottle at summer camp. "Lilly's made things a whole lot sweeter between you two."

PJ shoves on Joe's shoulder playfully. "Nah, dude. Not yet, anyway. It was just one kiss. It doesn't mean anything."

"You said that about camp, and the next day you were all over her."

"It's not gonna happen this time."

"Are you kidding me?" Alfie exclaims. "One kiss? You're already doing better than me and Zoe."

Zoe snorts. "In your dreams, Alfs."

"You love me, Zoe." Alfie gazes at Zoe lovingly. "Your lips say no, but your eyes say yes."

"Wh… no," she sputters. "Tell me that when I believe it."

He pouts. "Lemme buy you ice cream after school?"

She glares at him. "I'll say yes to us going out for ice cream. No for you buying it for me. I can pay for my own."

"But-"

"This is the 21st century, Alfie. I'm capable of affording my own sweet treats."

"Zoe, you are my sweet treat."

"Wow, a pickup line. I'll give that a four out of ten."

Zoe is Alfie's crush, who he liked since they were in elementary school. As they grew older, his innocent crush turned to mock declarations of love. Zoe usually brushes those comments off, but Phil knows that Alfie has genuine feelings for Zoe. He'd do anything that she tells him to do. He looks at her like a boy would do to his lover. He ever calls her lady love, his term of endearment for the object of his affection. Everyone except Zoe herself is aware that Alfie is in love with her.

Zoe directs her attention to Dan. "How about you, Dan? Anything exciting you did over the summer?"

"Ummm…" Dan has a sandwich in his hands, so he swallows what he has in his mouth and places the sandwich down on a brown napkin. "I learned how to make my own website."

Fiona looks at Dan, her light blue eyes glimmering with curiosity. "Care to give us a link?"

"I'm not finished with it yet," Dan replies in a somewhat embarrassed tone. "I can show it to you when I'm done."

"What's your website about?" Phil asks Dan. He would love to learn how to create a website. If Dan becomes a permanent member of the group, he can ask Dan to teach him.

Dan shrugs. "Nothing much. Stuff about myself. Reviews on my favorite music. My mom's the one who taught me. She's a web designer."

"Ah." W _onder if she designed any websites I know._ "So what kind of music do you like?"

"Rock."

Phil grins. He doesn't know too many students at school that loves rock music as much as him. PJ, Alfie, and Joe favor rock music too, but not to his extent. "I love rock music too. Who's your favorite band? Mine is Muse."

"No way!" Dan beams. "My favorite band is Muse too. I love their Origins of Symmetry album."

"Same here! What other bands do you like?"

"Well, I'm into modern rock. Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, Panic at the Disco, Radiohead… that's off the top of my head."

"How about Twenty One Pilots?"

"Tyler Joseph kills it on the ukulele."

"I like your taste." Every band that Dan named are some of Phil's favorite musicians too. He mentioned Twenty One Pilots as a bonus since their songs don't have a specific musical genre and it's a safe topic of discussion among mainstream music lovers.

"Thanks. Phil, right?"

Phil nods. He expects that it will take Dan some time to memorize the names of everyone in the group. During his freshman year, it had taken him the entire semester to remember everyone's names in his physical science class.

"Looks like Phil finally found a rock buddy," PJ comments, watching their exchange. "He's the biggest rock fan out of all of us."

"You don't say." Dan picks up his sandwich, not tearing his eyes away from Phil. Brown eyes meets blue eyes. Phil could drown in Dan's irises. The shade of Dan's eye color reminds him of chocolate.

He loves his chocolate as much as Muse.

Their staredown is interrupted by Alfie patting the back of Dan's shoulders. "Welcome to the group, man. We need more interesting people like you around."

Dan looks away first. Phil does too. Phil's palms are clammy and when he makes a sidelong glance at Dan, there's a foreign twinge in his stomach. What is this sensation? And what is it about the moment that has him subconsciously desiring Dan's attention on him again?

* * *

~:~

* * *

He leans uncomfortably against his locker, his body stiff as a long blonde-haired girl gazes up at him with a flirtatious gleam in her smoky gray eyes. _Fuck, it's only my second day and this is happening?_ No girl has ever flirted with Dan before, though the vibes he senses from this girl is making him want to bolt instead of try to flirt back.

"So new boy," the girl purrs. She drags her finger along his forearm. He shivers at the contact. The girl assumes his shiver to be a good sign, and leans closer to him, her breasts against his chest. "Where'd a hunk like you come from?"

"Uh…"

"Back off, Hannah." He peers over the girl's shoulder and is relieved to see Fiona walking toward them. Her eyes are clouded with irritation. "Go be a slut somewhere else."

"Don't be so mean, miss goody two shoes." Hannah smirks at Dan. "I was just welcoming Dan to our school."

"Nice try." Fiona stands beside Dan. "If you need a dick to suck, go do it with a cucumber."

Hannah rolls her eyes. "Geez, Lester. Can't a girl talk to a guy without being interrupted by his girlfriend?"

"I'm not his girlfriend, and neither will you." Fiona tugs on the sleeve of Dan's plaid top. "Now if you'll excuse me."

Eager to escape Hannah, Dan follows Fiona. She stops him once they are outside and away from the majority of students milling outside the building.

"You're a lifesaver," Dan thanks. Had Fiona not stepped in, Hannah could have done what Fiona said and given him a blowjob right there on the spot.

Fiona lets go of Dan's sleeve. "It's nothing."

"So who was she?"

She grimaces. "Hannah Conday, the queen bee of our 11th grade class who's not only beautiful and popular, but has the brains to go along with it. She has like a 3.8, even though I have no idea how she finds time to study with all the parties she goes to. She's my nemesis."

"I take it you don't like her either?"

"Nope. And neither does Phil and the rest of my friends. She's so self-absorbed and will hit on any cute guy, hence why she was pulling off her slut moves on you. She did it with Phil, Peej, and Alfie." Her grimace morphs into a small smile. "We have a nickname for her: Hannahconda. She sticks to guys and poisons them like an anaconda. And it matches with her last name."

He laughs. _Hannahconda? That's quite creative._ "I can see why."

She laughs along with him. "That nickname is how I tolerate her."

He shakes his head in amusement. "Guess there's a lot more I gotta learn from this school."

She winks at him. "Don't worry. You've got me and your six new friends as your guides."

* * *

~:~

* * *

Three weeks have passed. In a span of 21 days, Dan has made a mark in the school as the boy that girls dream about having. He was flirted upon by random female underclassmen, and aside from his encounter with Hannah, has been oblivious to their intentions. He has told his new group of friends on several occasions that he isn't ready to get into a relationship.

For a boy that they haven't known for too long, the friends treat Dan as if they've known him for years rather than a couple of weeks. He's a rare gem. They are lucky to have another person in their group that can not only dress the part, but also have a sincere personality to act the part.

In her math class, Fiona draws hearts labeled 'F+D' on the top left corner of a page in her composition book. She's captivated by Dan. Her last crush was Jack Harries, a quarterback and one of the star football players of the football players who graduated last spring. She had a crush on him since 9th grade when she worked on a photography assignment with him. Jack was the crush that she liked the longest, and the only reason she got over him was when she heard that Jack hooked up with Candice Fletcher, the former head of the cheerleading squad who was in Jack's graduating class, over the summer. Her crushes are usually the sporty type, so her peculiar attraction toward Dan is breaking her line of athletic crushes.

Dan is in no ways sporty. He's just as clumsy as Phil, having hands that he calls "butterfingers." However, she views Dan as different than most of the boys she knows. Aside from being drop dead cute, he's intelligent (he had a 3.7 GPA at his old high school) and funny. He has the sense of humor similar to her brother's: awkward and cringeworthy if you aren't open-minded to take it as a joke.

His nerdiness is the cherry on top of a cake. He's the kind of boy that has the geekiness to accompany the looks. He's the perfect package. She doesn't care that he doesn't have an athletic bone in his body. To her, personality triumphs athleticism.

It's his personality that's leading her to develop a crush on him.

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's after school on a Thursday on the third week of school. At the lunch table, the twins are waiting for the rest of their friends to arrive so they can head to the Suggs' house for their usual afterschool hangout. Fiona is playing Candy Crush on her phone, while Phil is reading the next assigned parts of Hamlet for his English class.

Phil's analysis about Fiona's behavior has been gnawing him since last weekend. Since the first day of school, he noticed the shift in her behavior around Dan. She laughs more, she blushes more, and she'd get more talkative. Her behavior is similar to an anime schoolgirl around the boy that she's in love with. She has the jitters that's only present when she's around her crushes.

Jack has a girlfriend. Once Fiona learns that her crushes are with someone else, her days of getting over her crush will begin. Judging by the way she stares at Dan behind his back, Jack is but a shadow of a memory in her mind. Dan has become her next eye candy.

Phil closes his book. He's eager to tell her about his observations. Now is a good time to find out if his inference is true. "Fi?"

Fiona looks away from her phone. "Yes?"

How will he ask her? Should he ask her directly? Should he say a few other things before bringing the question up? "Uh… so you and Dan."

A tint of pink graces her cheeks. "What about Dan?"

He can't beat around the bush. He's awful at stalling. Fiona and the rest of his friends have picked up on his mannerisms if he's doing so. The dead giveaway is his rambling. It's obvious when he starts to talk about things that's irrelevant to the current topic of discussion. His words is his way to delay an inevitable conversation.

"Do you like him?"

She blinks. He can sense her jitters strengthening. "Why do you ask?"

"I'm just wondering. You seem off since we met him." _Ask, don't demand._

The pink on her cheeks blooms into a light shade of red. "Oh."

"So… do you like him?" She can't avoid the truth forever. He's positive that she has a crush on Dan. She blushed the moment that he said Dan's name. If she blushes when a boy is mentioned, it gives a hint of who her crush is.

"I… I'm not sure," she stammers. "He's nice. He definitely has the hunk factor."

He laughs. The hunk part is a bit of an exaggeration, though he won't deny Dan's not-so-ugly physical appearance. Almost every girl at school that has seen Dan is smitten by his superficial charm, including Zoe and Louise.

"From a scale of 1 to 10, he's 11," Louise fawned during their walk with Zoe to their fourth period class during their first day back to school.

"Not just 11. He's break the scale," Zoe included.

The seven teens love Dan. As a new student, Phil would feel bad if an awkward boy like Dan gets influenced by the popular crowd. There are popular cliques (Hannah and her two friends, Katie and Jessica, being one of them) that give out the arrogant and/or bitchy vibe. Dan affirms a softness that can easily disappear if he's snatched away by the wrong kind of people.

"You like him," Phil declares. Fiona's flustered face says it all. _She can run, but she can't hide._

She narrows her eyes at him. "How would you know that?"

"Easy You were like this with Jack, Finn, Connor, Dean-"

"Alright! I get it!" she says with a groan. "I might like Dan. There, you happy?"

He smirks. He got what he wanted to hear. "That's all you had to say, sis."

She sighs. She covers her face with her hands. "Don't tell the others. I'm not ready to be grilled by Lou and Zoe, and I bet Peej, Alfs, and Joe won't be able to keep their mouths shut if they found out now." She inches her hands away from her face. Instead of putting them back on the table, she grabs one of his hands, squeezing it lightly. "Please don't say anything, Phil. I love having Dan with us and I don't want him to stop being friends with us if he finds out that I have a crush on him."

He nods. Of course he won't tell anybody. He respects her boundaries. She'll tell their friends when she's ready. "No telling. Gotcha."

He doesn't want to lose his new rock buddy. Dan is the only boy that he can obsess over Muse with without sounding like a crazed fan. He's becoming very close to this new student. It's too soon to lose a new friendship early in the school year.

Love is a fragile emotion for her. Crushing and falling in love are distinguishable feelings. What if she falls in love with Dan? According to Joe, four months is enough time for someone to be in love with their crush. Nearly three weeks have passed. Four months isn't too far away. It isn't impossible for her to be in love with Dan when the four-month mark arrives.

The gears turn in his head. If she falls in love with Dan, he'll have to be several steps ahead. He'll have to make sure that his sister won't be the only one that'll be in love.

 _This calls for a Phil Master Plan._

* * *

 **I've been a new student before. Twice. Once in 8th grade, the second in 10th grade. God, it was so horrible during the first couple of weeks, but I learned to adjust. I am a very, very socially awkward critter, so making new friends was hard for me.**

 **As you can see, I'll be using American terms over British terms since I don't know British language very well. I also won't be using a specific city where the story takes place. I'll leave you lovelies to imagine if the characters are in England or the U.S since Smosh (and the rest of their gaming + main channel squad) will come up in future chaps.**

 **Hannah shall be making a return later in the story, and her return will be during an important part of the fic. Also, that Hannahconda nickname is a reference to a character named Hannah Conde (a little girl named Kulot came up with the name) in a teleserye called Dolce Amore (which I'm bawling in the inside 'cause it's ending on Friday… I'm hoping for the best for Serena & Tenten). Hannah is a bitchy character in the show too, and I love the Hannahconda nickname so much that I couldn't help but add it in here.**

 **Shoutout to draftedtothemcrmy for the review (a virtual red velvet cupcake for you)! You're absolutely right about the non-plot rush. I've seen a lot of stories do that, and honestly, a rushed plot takes away the right-in-your-heart feel that a story's supposed to have. I'm all about the build-up and the moments that'll eventually bring the get-together of the love interests.**

 **Next update on Monday, so see you then!**

 **~ AA**


	3. Pokemon and a Gaming Weekend

Chapter 3: Pokemon and a Gaming Weekend

Haiku

 _To grow a friendship_

 _Start with a conversation_

 _You don't want to end_

* * *

It's another morning at a standard high school. Two boys are sitting at the lunch table, a half hour until the bell for first period will ring. Phil is playing Pokemon Platinum on his black 3DS. Dan is quietly watching the double screens of the portable gaming device. While PJ and Alfie are yet to arrive, Fiona had accompanied Zoe, Joe, and Louise to the cafeteria to purchase breakfast just before Dan came to the lunch table.

Dan is grateful that Zoe had befriended him on his first day. Initially, he was wary over how a pretty girl like Zoe was acting friendly toward him. At his former high school, pretty girls prefer not to talk with nerds. Barry, one of his casual friends from his former high school, had learned it the hard way when he tried to ask out Kelly Loggins, a girl in the fashion club. Kelly turned down Barry by telling him, "I'd rather drink toilet water than kiss a frog. Oh, and by the way, you're that frog."

Dan's new friends are nothing like Kelly. They are fun to be around. Zoe, Louise, and Fiona have pretty faces, but they aren't selfish. Zoe is artistic and loathes the shallow popular students. Louise has a stunning hourglass body, as well as the ears to listen to any problem, no matter how gross or embarrassing it is. Fiona has the brains (she and Phil have the highest GPA's in the group with 4.0's) and determination that makes her unwilling to give up on anything until she succeeds. As for the boys, they remind him of Barry and Bryony, Barry's younger sister and his only other casual friend from his hometown. Alfie has no verbal filter, and he's certain that the lovesick boy likes Zoe. Joe, a mirrored version of Zoe, is always willing to try new things. PJ is a mix of Alfie and Joe, and he proves that chivalry isn't dead (he hasn't made a move on Christy since the kiss that the boys mentioned on the first day). And Phil, who's a combination of everyone in the group and who he thinks is the raven-haired, blue-eyed version of him.

His friendship with Phil is different than his friendships with the rest of the group. Phil is the one that he's the closest with. He enjoys being around Phil. He likes the positive attitude that Phil always seems to have. When he's having a stressful day, seeing Phil smile will brighten his spirits. Phil fills the void in his chest that he carried when he left his hometown. Because of Phil, he's beginning to accept that his new home will treat him well.

"What's your favorite Pokemon?" Phil asks while he battles a random NPC.

"I don't have one," Dan answers briskly. How can he pick one out of the hundreds of Pokemon in the Pokedex? If he was asked the question when there were only 151 Pokemon, he would have easily said Ditto. Ditto is a representation of how he sometimes wishes he can transform into anything that he wants to be.

"I'm sure you do." Phil finishes battling the NPC and saves his progress.

"Do you have one?"

Phil turns to Dan. He nods. "Yup. Growlithe."

When it comes to Pokemon, the question about their favorite Pokemon is one of the few questions that they haven't discussed yet. So far, they've talked about their favorite fanart, memorable episodes of the franchise, and some of the fanfiction that they got to read. Talking about the well-known anime series is one of the next things they bonded about since the first day of school, as well as their obsession for all things anime.

Phil turns off his 3DS and puts it down on the table. "Why don't you have a favorite Pokemon?"

Dan shrugs. He isn't the only person in the world that doesn't have an affinity to a single Pokemon. "There's too many Pokemon. Can't pick just one." Creators add new Pokemon every time a new game with a new region is released. A "favorite Pokemon" will change once you start to like a newly created Pokemon.

"How about… naming one Pokemon you like," Phil suggests.

Dan names the first Pokemon that he can think of. "Mudkip."

Phil looks at Dan in interest. "Why?"

Dan ponders his response for a few seconds. "Because… I don't know. Mudkip is a water type. It's weak against electric types. Then it becomes a Swampert and have a duel type of water and ground type. Because it's a ground-type, electric types won't have an effect." A reason pops up in his head. "I guess… I like Mudkip because in Ruby, I learned to be patient about evolution. Yeah, Mudkip will be weak against electric types for several levels, but once it becomes a Swampert, the payoff will be worth it. Its weakness will be its strength. Kinda like how fears are to humans; our fears are our weakness and getting over them is our strength."

To Dan, Pokemon is more than a franchise. It's a fixation in his life. The games are his activity when he has free time. He collected cards as an attempt to look cool in elementary (which failed because it made him seem more as a dork). The first manga series he read was Pokemon Adventures (Red and Blue were one of his fictional shippings).

He grew up with Pokemon. No matter what people say, no one is ever too old for Pokemon.

"That's better than why I like Growlithe," Phil muses.

"Why's that?"

"Because I love the way it looks and I love fire types."

Dan laughs. He gave one of the most sentimental speeches ever and Phil rebutted with a much shorter explanation. Why didn't he do that to save his breath? "Thanks for making me feel like a gray-haired philosopher."

"Well thank you for making me feel like I need to read more Shakespeare."

He scoffs. "Fuck Shakespeare. Romeo and Juliet could've lived if they were patient." _Really Dan? God, I need to work on my sarcasm._

"Anyway." Phil directs the conversation to a different topic. "Speaking of Pokemon, do you play Super Smash Bros?"

"Yeah!" Dan played the first SSB game right after his first playthrough of Pokemon Red. That was a period of his life when he spent a lot of time playing Street Fighter and Tekken on arcade machines at a local arcade. Within the first hour of playing SSB, he was addicted. SSB was the game before Pokemon Tournament that was the closest he'd see combat-fighting using Pokemon.

"Who's your favorite player?"

"I don't have one." Pokemon isn't the only fandom where he can't choose a favorite character. It goes with all of his favorite fandoms.

Phil makes his impression of a cymbal sound. "I see what you did there."

 _Stop with the puns, Dan. You're starting to get incredibly cheesy._ "It was a pun that's not really a pun."

Phil pauses. "Hmmm… Dan, would you like to come over to my house sometime?" Phil looks at Dan with a hesitant gaze. "It's one of the games that I like to play with the boys. I even use the game sometimes to settle disputes with Fiona." Back in his hometown, Dan didn't know many gamer girls. He isn't sure if Fiona is a casual or hardcore gamer. If she's like her brother when it comes to gaming skills, then she'd be more than a casual gamer, but not quite there to be a hardcore gamer.

It has been over a month since the move. He has grown to like Phil and Fiona. Their house has been the only house he hasn't seen yet, and he has been curious to see where they live. "When can I come over?"

Phil grins. "How about Sunday afternoon? I won't have work. I'll text you the time."

 _I can get my homework done by then._ "Sunday it is."

In four days, he'll be seeing the Lesters' house for the first time. He's hoping that there won't be a repeat performance from the first time he went to PJ's house. He's still repressing the memory of breaking one of PJ's snow globes.

He'll be fine. All he has to do is keep his butterfingers from touching anything that's destructible.

* * *

~:~

* * *

In a two-story house at a neighborhood a few blocks away from school, the living room is filled with the familiar sounds of competitive yelling. Dan and Phil are in the middle of a heated battle in Super Smash Bros on the Wii. Fiona standing on top of the staircase of the house's second floor, arms trembling, fingers gripping the railing tightly, and legs that can buckle at any minute.

Fiona isn't sure whether to kill Phil or thank him. When Phil told her that someone was coming over on Sunday, she expected the guest to be one of the boys. He had brought out the 2014 version of Super Smash Bros from his room and left it on the TV stand in the living room. When that happens, it can only mean that video game weekend will be at their house. If only she knew that Phil's guest is Dan.

"Calm your tits," she mumbles. "It's Dan. He's your friend. Jack came over once when you worked on that photography project with him. You survived it then. You can survive again."

Dan is her second crush that stepped foot in the Lester household. Her parents are still at work, so she's relieved that he won't bear witness of her mom and dad going at each other's throats. She'd be too embarrassed that she might have to live under a rock forever. However, Dan would have had to visit their house at some point. What she didn't expect is for that day to be today. A little warning from Phil wouldn't have killed her. She should have had a head's up so she had some time to prepare herself.

She takes a few deep breaths. She'll have to get used to this. The sooner she knows how to compose herself around Dan, the better she'll be at hiding her feelings for him. She can't allow her feelings to ruin her brother's friendship with Dan.

She lets go of the railing, then slowly starts to walk down the stairs. _Fuck, I hope I won't sound like Porky the Pig._

* * *

~:~

* * *

The liveliness continues in the living room. Dan is proving to be a tough opponent for Phil, who has beaten the male Lester twin in three out of three matches so far. Phil would have to play as his best character, Charizard, if he has any hopes of defeating Dan in one match.

"Man, you're too good," Phil groans, staring helplessly at Mr. Game and Watch's victory pose on the screen. _When will I get to see a player 2 victory pose?_

For the third time, Dan makes a triumphant smile. "Better luck next time."

"Can I play?" They both turn around at the same time. Fiona strolls into the living room, wearing a confident grin. She makes herself comfortable by sitting on the floor next to the side of the couch that Dan is occupying. "I bet I can beat Dan at his own game."

Dan raises an eyebrow. "I'd like to see you try."

 _You shouldn't have said that._ If there's anyone that can beat Dan, it's Fiona. She has the SSB skills to be Japanese players online.

Fiona holds her hand out to the boys. "Hand me a controller."

Phil gives his controller to Fiona. "Take mine. I'm gonna get us a little snack. You guys want popcorn?" His fingers need a little rest before his next rematch.

Dan nods. "Sure."

"Drinks?"

Dan taps on the A button on his controller so the TV returns to the character selection screen. "You have Coke?"

"Uh-huh." He turns to Fiona. "Want a Coke too?"

"Sure," she responds, scrolling through the selection screen and picking Pikachu. He bites his tongue. The small electric mouse Pokemon is her best player. _Dan, you're so dead._

Phil stands up and heads to the kitchen. With his master plan in progress, he had to change the routine for this weekend's gaming day. He typically prepares drinks and snacks before PJ, Joe, and Alfie arrive, but part of his plan is about giving Dan and Fiona alone time. He has never seen the two spend quality time with each other without their friends around. If he's going to get his new friend to fall for his sister, they require at least a few minutes of space.

Phil takes his time with microwaving the popcorn. He opens the mini fridge of the water dispenser, grabbing two cans of Coke for Dan and Fiona and one can of Mountain Dew for himself, then putting them on the kitchen table. As he waits for the microwave to finish popping the popcorn, he thinks about what could be happening in the living room. Is Dan giving Fiona a hard time? Are they solely focused on the game, or are they sharing casual conversation at the same time?

Dan and Fiona would look like a good couple. They have some common interests with each other. They both love Game of Thrones and are serious about school. Give or take a few more months, Phil can see the makings of a love story brewing between them. Their ship name would be funny too: Fan. _I'd be the first fan to support Fan._

Phan would be a funny ship name too. It has the same pronunciation too. But Phan is a platonic ship. He and Dan are the two best friends in a show that fangirls are desperate to see get together. This is real life. Dan is his friend. He has to focus on making Fan happen.

 _ **"No way! I'm down to one life!"**_

 _ **"That's right baby!"**_

 _ **"No! I'm not going to lose!"**_

Phil chuckles. He's curious if Fiona has used Pikachu's special attack yet. It took her months to master Pikachu's volt tackle since it's one of the hardest special attacks to master in SSB.

The microwave beeps. Phil turns off the outlet and takes out the bag of popcorn. He goes over to the dishrack and grabs one of the big bowls. Opening the bag, he pours popped kernels into the bowl until the bag is empty. After throwing away the bag into the trash bin, he carries the bowl in one hand and the three soda cans in his other arm back into the living room. He sees Dan shaking his head and Fiona pumping her fist in the air.

"Whoo-hoo! Victory is mine!" Fiona cheers. _Looks like we have a winner._

"You proved me wrong." Dan holds out a hand to Fiona. "Good game."

She shakes his hand. "You were a worthy player. No wonder Phil couldn't beat you."

"Phil can hear you, ya know." Phil puts the bowl and cans on the coffee table. He squeezes himself between Dan and Fiona on the couch. "Who won?"

Fiona leans forward and grabs a small handful of popcorn. She shoves the popped kernels in her mouth in a single bite. "Me of course."

Dan takes one of the Coke cans. "I'm glad your sister isn't a noob."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," Fiona says sarcastically. _Ooh… don't call her a noob, Dan. If she didn't like you, she'd kick you in the groin._

Phil grabs the can of Mountain Dew. "It's one of the things I love about my sis. No guy ever wants to underestimate her gaming skills." She has boys in the palm of her hand once they find out that she's an excellent gamer.

"It's a secret talent," Fiona says proudly. "Feminine on the outside, tomboy in the inside."

Dan opens his Coke can. He takes a small sip. "This is why I'm glad I met you lot. You know how to make every day feel like a party." His eyes land on Phil. "Thanks for letting me come over. This is the most fun I've had since I moved here."

Phil give Dan's shoulder a light squeeze. Even though he lost all of his matches against Dan, his losses makes him determined to be a better gamer. "Don't sweat it. You're welcome here anytime."

Phil looks over at Fiona. Her head is turned slightly to the side and he sees a portion of one of her side flushing. His insides do a happy dance.

It's working. His master plan isn't going to be a waste of time.

* * *

 **Wow, I totally geeked out in this chapter. Am I the only one wishing that Snake can be a downloadable character? My best friend was genuinely pissed off when we first learned that Snake wasn't returning for the new SSB game.**

 **Speaking of Pokemon, how's Pokemon Go going for ya'll? If that's how crazy it made people, I'm imagining what happens when Sun & Moon comes out. Still way too hyped that the region is based off where I live and I can recognize every single local reference that the creators made. Which reminds me, go try a malasada. It's so sweet and fricking good. The ones at this bakery called Leonard's make 'em the best.**

 **So the teleserye I mentioned in the last chapter (Dolce Amore) ended last Friday and I just gotta say that the ending was done beautifully well (this won't make sense to you, but I didn't see it coming when Ian Veneracion was there as a priest for Serena & Tenten's wedding). Every loose end was dealt with and the thing that I thought would remain the way it was actually got solved. I can't tell you what that thing is because let's just say that thing is a small inspiration for this story.**

 **~ AA**


	4. Disjointed Marriages and a Family Dinner

Chapter 4: Disjointed Marriages and a Family Dinner

Haiku

 _Nothing is perfect_

 _Things are never as it seems_

 _From the naked eye_

* * *

Dan paces back and forth on the wooden floor of his bedroom. Two weeks ago, he was a nervous wreck when he visited Phil and Fiona's house. Tonight, the roles are reversed. He's the one playing host this time.

The Lester twins are meeting Dan's family tonight. After his SSB gaming weekend with Phil and Fiona, he summoned the courage to return the favor and asked them to come over for dinner. His mom is eager to meet some of his new friends and he chose the twins to be the first people for her and the rest of his family to meet.

He stops pacing, then faceplants on the bed. He's being worked up for nothing. As long as his parents don't say anything to embarrass him or his guests, the dinner will run smoothly. He's introducing a couple of his friends, not a girlfriend. If he was introducing a girlfriend, he'd be rocking in a corner, praying that he can still show his face to her when the family introduction is through.

His iPhone vibrates. He extends his hand and reaches toward his bedside drawer. He finds that it's a text from Phil. _**Fi & I on our way. Be there in 5**_

The twins will be here soon. He sits up, shoving his phone in the back pocket of his jeans. _To the heavens above, please don't let my parents scare them off._

* * *

~:~

* * *

The twins are on their way to meet their new friend's family for the first time. Phil is excited to finally meet the people that raised a well-behaved, nerdy son. Fiona is nervous about a prospect of saying something stupid to their Dan's family. This is the first time that she's going to meet a crush's family, as well as the first time that she's eating dinner with a crush _and_ his family. _Thank god Phil will be with me._

When the Lester twins arrive at the Howells' house, they are greeted by a younger, shorter boy than Dan at the front door. He has the same shade of brown as Dan's eyes, though his hair is a darker shade of brown that's almost black.

"Hi!" The younger boy tilts his head up to look up at Phil and Fiona. "I'm Adrian."

She can see the boy's resemblance to Dan. This must be his younger brother. "I'm Fiona."

Phil smiles at Adrian. "I'm Phil."

"Wow," Adrian marvels. "Are you two really twins?"

"Fraternal twins," she responds. She's used to seeing the awe in people's faces when she tells them that Phil is her twin brother and not a best friend (even though he is a best friend too). "It's less common than normal twins."

"Who says these two are normal?" Dan appears behind Adrian. She stifles a gasp at his attire. He's wearing a black t-shirt with white stars near the collar and white rectangles on the sleeves, a pair of navy blue jeans, and black sneakers. Dan's closet may have an abundance of dark clothing, but she thinks black suits him. It makes him look more hot without having a gothic persona.

Phil looks at Dan in amusement. "Are you implying that we're aliens?"

"You could be. Are you from Mars?"

"Mars is a deserted planet! If we were aliens, we'd come from a planet from far, far away."

"And what planet would that be?"

"Philtopia."

She giggles. She pictures a blue-colored planet (blue is Phil's favorite color) bowing down to a shrine of her brother. "I highly doubt a planet would be named purely after you."

"Alright, I believe you two are one hundred percent human." Dan gestures for the two of them to come inside. "Dinner's ready. Let's carry these mad bants in the kitchen."

* * *

~:~

* * *

A family of four and their two guests are savoring the two apple pies that a mother baked specifically for tonight. The twins are amazed by how the dinner has progressed. The family welcomed them with open arms and any nerves that the teens had disappeared in the light atmosphere once they settled inside.

"So these are some of the people that didn't alienate my son on his first day of high school," Mr. Howell commented when he saw the twins for the first time and shook their hands.

"Dad," Dan whined. His cheeks heated in embarrassment. "I may be weird, but I'm not a complete loner."

"I know," Mr. Howell reassured Dan. "I just want my son to have some friends. He isn't the best conversation starter."

Dan shook his head. "Thanks for the help, dad."

Phil and Fiona were amused by the exchange. Dan has a close relationship with his parents, and Phil wishes that his family were the same way. He has a decent relationship with his dad, joking around from time to time, but their bond is nothing close to Dan and Mr. Howell. Much less his mom, who takes things way too seriously and worries about the littlest things.

At the dinner table, Mrs. Howell prepared big portions of chicken curry, mashed potatoes, and tossed salad. While the six people ate, the Howell parents shared stories about Dan and Adrian's childhood. Everyone cracked up at the story of Dan and his fascination of Martha Stewart when he was six. In return, Phil and Fiona shared tidbits of their childhood (Martyn included), excluding the details involving their parents. For now, Phil doesn't want the Howells to know how imperfect the Lester family is.

In the middle of eating dessert, Mr. Howell stands up from his seat and calls for everyone's attention. "Phil and Fiona Lester, it's time for you to join us in a Howell family tradition."

Dan groans, staring at Mr. Howell with pleading eyes. "Dad, do we have to?"

"Of course." Mr. Howell goes around the table and pats the top of Dan's shoulders. "We did this for Adrian's friends. Now that you have friends that you seem to be getting close to, it's only fair that they get the same treatment. "

"I'm going to hell," Dan mumbles.

Mr. Howell chuckles. "They're nice kids. I'm sure they'll do as well."

Adrian nudges Phil's shoulder. "We do this whenever I bring home a friend."

Mr. Howell glances at Phil, then Fiona. "When Adrian's friends come to eat dinner with the family, they can't leave without singing karaoke with us."

Dan shifts uncomfortably in his seat. "I apologize in advance if you're horrible at singing."

Mr. Howell smiles. "We don't care if you can't sing. Karaoke is our way of bonding. If you do it with us, then you're part of the family."

Dan sighs. "Same sentimental explanation. Good job, dad."

 _Singing? Better than jumping off a cliff. I'm not a walrus._ Phil is more worried about Fiona. I cringe at her off-key once she hits a high note. "I'm up for a game of song."

Fiona nods. "If Phil's in, I'm in."

Mr. Howell claps his hands. "Excellent! I'll get the system set up." He leaves the room, followed by Mrs. Howell and Adrian.

Dan looks at Phil and Fiona in pity. "Well, this should be fun."

* * *

~:~

* * *

Remote control in hand, Dan scans through the available songs on a karaoke machine. He's the last one up to perform. Even though he's only singing in front of five people, it's as if he's singing to an entire stadium.

Dan hoped that his dad forgot about the Howell karaoke family tradition. Once the karaoke system is out, no one can back out. He dreaded to reel the twins into doing something they don't want to do. He didn't mention the tradition to them all week. He believed that he'd be lucky and his parents wouldn't bring it up. Unfortunately, the tradition didn't pass his dad's mind.

Surprisingly, the twins were didn't mind being put on the spot. What potentially could have been a reason for them to think that Dan was crazy turned out to be quite the opposite. They were unashamed to belt out to throwback songs. Phil sang Can't Touch This by MC Hammer, attempting to do all the moves from the original music video. Fiona sang Hero by Mariah Carey, and although she couldn't reach the high pitches, Dan gave her an A for effort. Adrian sang Toxic by Britney Spears, and Dan thinks Fiona might be a little scarred at the sight of his little brother who was on the verge of giving her a lap dance. His mom and dad sang You're the One that I Want, and he's still internally cringing from watching his parents trying to act like teenagers.

Microphone in hand, he selects I'll Be by Edwin McCain. It's his safe song, a song that doesn't involve high notes or low baritones. His mom would play it all the time on her phone while preparing dinner for the family.

 _ **The strands in your eyes**_

 _ **The color of them wonderful**_

 _ **And stealing my breath**_

 _ **Emeralds from mountains**_

 _ **Thrust toward the sky**_

 _ **Never revealing their depth**_

When he reaches the chorus, everyone starts to sing along.

 _ **I'll be your crying shoulder**_

 _ **I'll be love's suicide**_

 _ **I'll be better when I'm older**_

 _ **I'll be the greatest fan of your life**_

The twins' eyes are locked on him as he performs the rest of the song. They resemble fishes caught out of the water. If his parents and little brother weren't in the room, a stranger could walk in and think that he's serenading to one of them. It's the song that his mom and dad danced to on their wedding (he watched their wedding video when he was 10). His favorite karaoke song is a love song, and he's singing it in front of his two new friends.

Someday, he'll sing this song to the person that he falls in love with. When that day will come, he doesn't know. He doesn't believe in psychics to tell him what will happen in the near future.

The future is uncertain. For all he knows, his true love may be closer than he thinks.

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's nighttime on the last week of September. Phil is sprawled out on the colorful duvet of his bed. In his bedroom, he's cringing at the sounds of heated shouting from the bedroom across from his. The yelling is the smoke spreading through the air from burnt food; its unpleasant smell would make him quick to use the extinguisher to make the smoke disappear. But this is a smoke that can't dissipate in a few minutes. It's a smoke that takes an entire night, perhaps a few days, until it's gone.

He glances down at his phone. It's 9:32 PM. _Why do mom and dad have to fight when Martyn and I are home?_ He's glad that Fiona is sleeping over at the Suggs' house for a sleepover with Zoe and Louise. She's in luck. She won't have to have another panic attack when she hears the sounds of their parents' hatred toward each other. Meanwhile, Martyn is in his room, ignorant to the noise. His way of coping is to act oblivious and pretend everything is fine.

 _ **"You're home late again!"**_

 _ **"I'm always home late. Why are you complaining?"**_

 _ **"You spend no time with me or the kids. It's always work, work, work."**_

 _ **"Well work is what puts a roof over our head!"**_

He groans. His dad didn't choose to be busy all the time. He understands that work is a priority, even though he's giving up time to spend with his family. However, his mom yelling at his dad to get her point across doesn't help anyone. When his mom yells, his dad will yell in retaliation. Their anger at each other is an erupting volcano that blows up at inconvenient times.

Maybe Dan will let Phil sleep over at his place tonight. He needs peace and quiet. Dan's room is an environment with far less tension than his room. He has yet to spend a full night at the Howells, although he spent enough time in the brown-haired boy's room to know that he can get a good night's sleep there.

He sends a brief text to Dan. **_Its late but do u mind if I come over?_**

He receives a response from Dan in less than a minute. **_Sure. Wait do u wanna spend the night here?_**

 _Anywhere is better than here_

He waits a few minutes for Dan to text back. _**Just asked mom. Sure.**_

He sighs in relief. Dan is his lifesaver.

* * *

~:~

* * *

In a different bedroom at a house not too far away, Dan is listening to Irresistible by Fall Out Boy while lying in bed. Phil is due at any minute. He's concerned about Phil's well-being, so he was quick to ask his mom to allow his raven-haired friend stay over for the night.

 _I wonder what's going on with Phil._ Phil wouldn't have agreed to stay over at Dan's house overnight unless something happened at his house. _Did it involve Fiona? His parents? A ghost named Steve?_ The more he thinks about the possibilities, the more he's worried about what it is that caused Phil to call him and want to stay over at his house.

The door of his bedroom swings open. He pauses the music on his phone and removes his headphones. Phil stands there wearing a forlorn expression, carrying a duffel bag in one hand. "Hey."

He smiles warmly at Phil. "Hi… are you okay?" _He's not smiling. Of course he's not okay, you twat._

When Phil shakes his head, Dan pats the space on his bed. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Phil closes the door behind him. "I think I have to." He joins Dan on the bed and leaves his duffel bag on the floor. He sits down facing Dan, crossing his legs. Phil is normally a positive person. It would take an unusual circumstance to bring a foul mood to his bright companion.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to," Dan murmurs. "We're friends. I understand if it's too hard for you to tell me what's going on."

"That's the thing Dan." His lip curls downward. "You let me into your house with no explanation at almost 10 in the evening. Only a real friend would do that for me."

 _Because you are a real friend, Phil. You, Fiona, and the rest of them. Your friends have become my friends._ "Do you do this with your other friends?"

"All the time. The guys are on speed dial."

"Does Fiona do it too?"

"With the girls." Phil bites his lip. "She got lucky tonight. She has no idea what's happening at home." The frown on his face remains. _What the hell's going on? What happened at his house?_ Dan doesn't like seeing this side of Phil. He wants jubilant Phil, not an emo Phil. Being emo is supposed to be his thing.

Dan is taken aback by Phil's next words. "I wish I had a family like yours."

 _A family like mine?_ "What? Why?"

Bitterness crosses Phil's features. "You have a happy family. Your mom is always so welcoming when I come over. Your dad notices me when he comes home from work. Adrian is so eager to talk to me that sometimes I spend too much time talking to him than with you." Phil's lips curves slightly upward. "I'm happier when I'm here or at any of my friends' house. I'm happier anywhere than my own home."

 _A happy family. Could that mean...?_ If Phil's parents are having problems, their marriage could be leading to a solution that will devastate any child. "Are your parents filing for divorce?"

Phil sighs. "I wish."

He's confused. Divorce is supposed to be a decent solution to a married couple that are unhappy with each other. There's also marriage counseling, but there's a chance that Phil's parents considered the option and rejected it. "Why not?"

Phil shrugs. "That's what Fiona and I try to figure out. They fight a lot. It's been like this since we were little kids. They argue and it'll turn into a full-out verbal fight. The next day, they won't talk to each other. They'll avoid each other for a couple of days, and then things will just… go back to normal. It's as if they didn't have the argument in the first place. Only they did, and it won't be the last time they'll fight." He grimaces. "Fiona, Martyn, and I aren't blind. We know they aren't happy with each other. It's stupid to think this, but I'd be happy if mom and dad get separated. It'll make life a lot less complicated."

 _That makes a whole lot of sense._ When he thinks about it, the twins barely talk about their parents. He didn't notice it back then, but it explains why they only invite him over to their house in the afternoon. He was waiting for the day that he'd get to meet their family. Now he knows. He knows why Phil loves talking to his mom when he comes over, why Fiona spends a lot of time with the girls, and why Martyn is never present at their house in the afternoons. They were doing their best to prevent Dan from learning about the details of their true family life.

"Is this why you and Fiona are really close?"

Phil uncrosses his legs. "Yup. PJ, Alfie, Joe, Zoe, Louise… they all know. Once I call them after eight or nine, the first question they'll ask is if Fiona and I need a place to stay for the night."

"Then why didn't you crash at their place tonight instead of mine?" It's odd for Phil to choose Dan, a boy that he only knew for two months. Their friendship is still growing. Their bond is nothing compared to the three boys that Phil has known for years.

"I like your room," Phil answers. His eyes glances in different directions around Dan's room. "It has this kind of tranquility that I wish my room has. If I have to be imprisoned somewhere, I'd want to be imprisoned in your room. And I thought tonight was a good night to tell you the truth so there are no more secrets between us."

"Were you ready to tell me tonight?"

"I didn't plan on it, but I'd have to tell you eventually. Better now than later."

The confession makes him truly feel the worthiness of being Phil's friend. Their friends are loyal to them if he couldn't figure out from them that the twins his something from him. But Dan has his share of secrets too. He has one secret that he kept to himself, because he didn't know anyone that related to his situation. After hearing Phil's explanation about his family, he knows that Phil is the ideal first person that he can tell. Phil isn't the only one who has a far less perfect family.

"I kind of know how you feel," Dan starts.

Phil eyes him skeptically. "Your parents don't fight."

 _I hope this doesn't sound stupid._ "They don't. But… I don't know. Do your parents love each other?"

Phil laughs scornfully. "Judging by the way I never see them exchange a single 'I love you' to each other, nope."

 _We look perfect, but it's all an illusion._ "Okay, lemme backtrack. I'm empathetic about your situation because I sometimes feel my parents don't have the kind of love a married couple should have."

Phil's skeptical gaze returns. "Elaborate."

 _It's nothing close to a divorce, but it's close enough._ "Well… look at it this way. My parents are the best parents I could ever ask for. But notice the way they interact with each other. They're friendly, but they don't look at each other in that sappy lovey-dovey way couples do. They're comfortable around each other, but they aren't intimate. It's like they're good friends and forgetting the fact that they're married. See where I'm getting at?"

Phil leans forward slightly. "I think so… so your parents lack love a love life."

"I guess you can say that."

"Looks like we're on the same page."

Dan nods in agreement. "We both have parents with flawed marriages."

They fall silent. For years, he believed that married couples who remain married means that they have a healthy marriage. He thought that every movie, TV show, and anime he has watched can make him see if a couple on the streets are in love or are merely doing it for the public. But he was wrong. Real life is a messier version of cinema. Every person is an actor and their life is their ongoing story.

Love isn't the sole reason why people who are married stay married to their spouse that they are unhappy with. They'll endure a stagnant marriage love so they won't hurt loved ones that'll be affected by a divorce. They'd choose to be selfless than to be selfish.

Dan scoots forward until their legs touch. His soft gaze meets Phil, sliding his hand to touch the hand of his raven-haired friend. "You aren't alone. I'm here for you."

"You don't mind if I'm dumping all this crap on you?" Phil whispers.

 _The world is crap. Your problem isn't._ "It isn't crap when it means something."

Friends can tell each other anything. That's what Phil is to Dan. Phil is his friend, someone that makes him belong here. Phil is someone that has more layers than he assumed, yet those layers haven't affected his positive personality. They are more alike than he thought.

Their similarities are just another reason why moving into this city may be the best thing that ever happened to him.

* * *

~:~

* * *

At 2 AM, they lay side-by-side on Dan's bed. Phil is fast asleep, and since he's a heavy sleeper, he'll most likely remain asleep until morning. Dan, on the other hand, is wide awake, staring at Phil's face.

Dan shoves away the thought of touching Phil's face. There's something tempting about touching Phil while he's in a serene state. Phil's body is a marble statue, one that Dan's hands ache to touch. The more he resists, the more the thought echoes in his head. _Touch him. Feel him. What he doesn't know won't hurt him._

He groans softly, shifting to his side. He clenches the bedsheet beneath his body.

He cares a lot for Phil, but how much is too much before caring morphs into a different feeling altogether?

* * *

 **Ah friendship goals. Meeting the parents of a friend is always nerve-wracking. I felt the same way when I met my best friend's mom for the first time several years ago. The story is still a bit slow, but these chapters are meant to be the base of the nitty gritty of events that are coming up. There's a reason why drama is the genre of IPY. If I could add more than two genres, friendship and hurt/comfort would've been on there too.**

 **There's also gonna be a lot of little time skips (not too far apart, maybe one or two weeks between events). Cause you know, I'm not gonna show every little detail in their lives. Just the important bits that keeps the story flowing.**

 **I'll also start posting the chapters on my Tumblr. If you wanna follow the story on there too or wanna chat with me (I'm way better to talking to people online than IRL), my username is awkwarddezzy. I prefer reading phanfics here than on Tumblr, although Tumblr (or DeviantArt, because that's where I browsed for fanart when I was younger) is where I go to satisfy phanart, memes, screenshots.. well you get the gist.**

 **~ AA**


	5. Zalfie and an Approval

Chapter 5: Zalfie and an Approval

Haiku

 _Choose to be patient_

 _Let the moments determine_

 _Who is meant to be_

* * *

The friends are sitting at their lunch table after school on a Friday two weeks before Halloween. Fiona had given them the green light for their sleepover to be at their house tomorrow night. Normally, sleepovers aren't done at their house, so Phil was relieved when his strict mother gave him and Fiona permission to allow their sleepover to be at a home where they are always apprehensive about unpredictable timing of their parents' arguments.

Everyone is in the loop about Dan's knowledge of the Lester twins' parents. Phil is glad that a bit of weight is lifted from his and Fiona's shoulders. For weeks, she was worried about Dan's reaction once he learned about their secret home life. Once he told her that Dan understood their parent's dilemma, she was assured that Dan will be ready if he's around when the ceasefire ends.

Zoe looks over at Fiona with a concerned expression. "Are you sure your parents are fine having the sleepover at your place?"

Fiona nods. "As long as our lights are off by midnight, she won't mind." She glances at Dan. "Are you coming?"

"Wouldn't miss it," Dan replies. He has done one sleepover with the guys, but this will be the first time that he'll be present for a group sleepover. The eight teens haven't had one since the week before Louise left for her Paris trip.

"This is great!" Alfie says excitedly. "It's… what? Two years since the last time we all slept over at your house?"

"It'll also be the first time Dan will be with us," PJ points out.

"What can I expect for this sleepover?" Dan asks. "I'm used to doing it with the guys. What happens when you have girls present?"

"There's no difference, We watch a movie. Eat snacks. Study for exams if we need to. Play board games. The typical group sleepover," Louise explains.

Joe raises his hand. "Ooh! Can I bring Cards Against Humanity?"

PJ chuckles. "Should I ask why a 14-year-old has Cards Against Humanity?"

"I saw it on Amazon and had to buy it. The YouTubers have a fun time playing it."

"You're going to ruin your innocence if you play."

"My innocence is already ruined by being around you lot."

"I'll take that as a compliment," Alfie tells Joe.

 _Hope nothing's gonna go wrong._ Phil doesn't want tomorrow to be the night that Dan sees the horrors within the walls of his home.

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's 10:51 AM on a Saturday night. The Lester residence is vacant with threats to leave each other. Fiona is brushing her teeth in the bathroom. She's unable to stop thinking about the conversations that she had with her mother during the sleepover. Her mom's perspective about Dan is vital to their friendship. She wouldn't want him to be excluded from the group if her mom and dad didn't like him as her friend.

 _"So there's one more person coming over later."_

 _"Who is it?"_

 _"His name is Daniel. Dan for short."_

 _"Daniel Howell I presume? The new student that Phil talks about?"_

 _"That's him."_

 _"Tell me about him."_

 _"What do you want to know?"_

 _"How are his grades? Does he smoke? Does he drink?"_

 _"Mom, he's only been here for a couple months. He's never been expelled if that's what you want to hear."_

 _"Fiona, I'm serious. I like your friends because they study hard. You know I don't want you being around people that aren't."_

 _"Dan's a nice guy. He had a 3.7 GPA in his old school. He can't tolerate smoking and thinks underage people is for people who don't want a future."_

 _"Really?"_

 _"Give him a chance. He's a great friend. We wouldn't have let him in our group if he wasn't like us."_

Fiona feared that her mom would scare Dan off when he met her family. Her mom interrogated him with questions once she introduced him. Thankfully, he didn't seem too fazed and answered every question that her mom fired at him. Her dad didn't ask as many questions, and he didn't mind the fact that there was one more boy in the house. Martyn had said a quick hi to Dan before walking out the front door to watch a movie with his friends. By the time the eight friends retired to Phil's room, her mom voiced her the approval that she needed to hear.

 _"He's a good boy. Better than that Jack."_

 _"I told you so."_

 _"He would be a good suitor."_

 _"Mom, I told you a million times. I'm not looking for a boyfriend."_

 _"I'm just giving you my opinion. If Daniel courts you, then it's okay."_

 _"What guy courts nowadays?"_

 _"Fiona, courting is the proper way for a boy to show he cares for you."_

 _"Serenading is the closest thing to courting in today's society."_

 _"Then if he serenades you, make sure he serenades you well."_

 _"I'll think about that if he shows up in a tuxedo one day bent down on one knee with a rose in his hand and asks me on a date."_

 _"Sweetie, I think you've been watching too much of that Bachelor show. It's hard to find that kind of boy in modern society."_

She didn't have to tell her mom about her crush on Dan. She accepted the possibility of her and Dan as a couple. If she ever introduced him as her boyfriend (which she has never done, even though she had a couple of short-term relationships), her parents won't blow a fuse. They won't give say things such as "You're not good enough for my daughter."

She lifts her glass cup to her lips, rinsing her mouth. She's looking too far ahead. Optimism doesn't meant that Dan will wake up one day and suddenly realize that he likes her. She can't rush into things. If Dan is meant to be more than a crush, then she'll just have to be patient and be rewarded when she waits for the opportune time.

* * *

~:~

* * *

All of the lights in the Lester household are off, aside from a lamp in one of the bedrooms. Zoe is looking down at the sleeping bag laid out a few inches away from hers. The body in that sleeping bag is letting out soft snores. _You sneaky little bastard._ She sighs. She should have seen this coming.

If the group sleepover was at the Suggs' house, Alfie wouldn't have the nerve to sleep close to Zoe. She and Joe have small bedrooms. The girls sleep with her. The boys sleep with Joe. They swore to their parents when they were 11 that boys aren't allowed to sleep in Zoe's room (aside from Joe) and girls aren't allowed to sleep in Joe's room (aside from Zoe).

"You never know what men can do in your sleep," her dad had advised.

The same rule applies in all of the other friends' houses except PJ and the twins. PJ's room is large enough for all of them too sleep in his room. Phil and Fiona's parents don't care about who sleeps with who. They will care if they find condoms in the trash cans the next morning.

Zoe can't move her sleeping bag without disturbing Fiona and Joe. Her only option is to suck it up and sleep next to him. _Ugh. This is fucking ridiculous._

Quietly, she moves into her sleeping bag. She puts as much space as possible between her and Alfie. He has dragged his sleeping bag next to hers multiple times. Her easy fix was to put at least two feet of empty space between them. That way, she won't be tempted to slap him while he's asleep, although Alfie would probably enjoy being slapped and say something like "Do it again, baby."

This isn't the worst thing that has ever happened to her. It's one night. She can murder Alfie in her dreams to make her feel better. So when she's drifting into slumber, she dreams of chasing Alfie with a sledgehammer, screaming "Alfie Deyes, you are one dead son of a bitch!"

* * *

~:~

* * *

Daylight rises on the horizon on a Sunday morning. Zoe senses the body heat and breathing of a nearby body. Her eyes snap open. Her head is on someone's chest and her hands are on that person's shoulders. She sits up and her eyes bulge open. _Fuck my life._ If any of her friends saw their position, the immediate assumption is that she and this person are a couple.

She bites down on her tongue. Loads of curse words enter her mind. She's holding back from letting the expletives escape her mouth. Scanning the room, she sees that Fiona and Joe are still asleep. She rubs her eyes, letting out a soft groan. She should have put her sleeping bag further away from Alfie. If she did, she wouldn't have found herself in that compromising position.

"Morning already?" She turns her head. Alfie yawns and raises his arms over his head. He angles his body toward her. "You're awake."

"Not for too long." He must have just woken up. _Good. He probably has no idea what happened._

His arm reaches out to touch her thigh. "You alright, love? You're looking pale."

"Pale? No. I'm still a bit tired." _Better than blushing, or else he'll know that I don't want to be in the same room as him right now._

"If you're tired, go back to sleep," he recommends.

"There's no point. Once I'm up, I'm up." _Wait he's touching me._ "And get your hand off my thigh." She swats his hand away.

"Ow! Damn woman, you hit hard." He smirks. "Care to hit me elsewhere?"

She grabs her pillow and throws it at his head. _Where can I find a sledgehammer…?_ "Get your mind off the gutter. I'll hit you when the sun doesn't shine."

He draws his hand away. "So you'll hit me tonight?"

"Alfie!" _Definitely need that sledgehammer._

"What? That's when the sun doesn't shine."

She rolls her eyes. _Smartass_. "I'm gonna go make breakfast. Go hit yourself in the meantime."

She rushes out of the room before Alfie can say anything else. The universe is playing tricks on her. How much does the universe ship Zalfie? The universe has to find another person to play with, because she doesn't want to be a player in this kind of game.

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's the Monday after the sleepover. Zoe enters her third period drawing and painting class, sitting down at her two-seater table in the middle row of the classroom. Her mind hasn't forgotten waking up next to her Alfie in a lover's position. _It was a one time thing. It won't happen again. I'll sleep next to one of the others next time._ She'll do anything to avoid unknowingly sleeping next to Alfie and end up in another intimate pose.

She's being affected by the memory more than she should. She's mulling over something that her friends doesn't know. She hasn't told them because they might read into it and encourage her that it's a sign for Zalfie to happen. All her friends wish for Zalfie to be real. Even Dan thinks they'd look like a perfect couple.

"Hello lady love!" _Speaking of denouncing Zalfie._ Alfie takes his seat conveniently next to her. Mrs. Hamm is a teacher that didn't have a specific seating arrangement during their first day of class. She gave them free reign to pick their own seats, which they have to sit on for the entire semester (it's up to them if they want to switch seats next semester). Because it's an art class, their tables are made for groups rather than singles. Every table is a two-seater.

Naturally, Alfie chose to sit next to her. She's stuck with him for the last few weeks of the semester and the entirety of next semester. She knows that he won't want to switch seats. She doesn't talk to anyone else in the class beside him and Carrie. She's the kind of person that prefers to sit with her friends or with people that she's comfortable talking to. She feels sorry for students that are stuck with "undesirable" students, like a talkative popular person.

She rummages through her backpack for her sketchpad and purple pencil case. "Hey."

"How's your self-portrait going?" he asks.

"It's coming along." _I haven't even finished drawing my face yet._

"Can I see it when you're done?" _So you can gawk at it like a blow up poster of a Baywatch lifeguard?_

"Of course. You don't need to ask." She sets her materials on the table and drops her backpack on the floor next to her chair. "How about you? How's your sketch?"

"I'm halfway done." _Yeah right._

"Good." She finally turns her head to look at him. He's staring at her with giddy, mischevious eyes, the same eyes that usually makes her want to swat him, maybe kiss him if she was one of those girls that wants to go down on him. _As if._ She'll lose her oral virginity (and not the kissing kind) on Alfie when a meteor strikes the earth.

The second bell rings and Mrs. Hamm starts class. She takes attendance and makes a few reminders before giving everyone a handout for the big project that she mentioned last Friday and will go more in-depth with today.

"The purpose of the project is to unleash your inner creativity. Everyone here has something they have yet to share. For this assignment, this is your chance to show that." Zoe turns to the next page of the handout where the instructions of the project is. "Working in teams of two, you'll design a 10 to 15 page comic with a storyline of your choice. This won't be due until March, but I want you to have an idea what you'll be drawing about before the semester ends so you have time to work on the project during winter break. Your partners will be the person you are sitting with."

She blinks. _Alfie? Really? Alfie. ALFIE._ Her mind drifts off during the rest of Mrs. Hamm's explanation. She and Alfie will be working on a project for five months. They'll be spending more time outside of class than they already do.

She resists letting out a frustrated groan. _Is there a black hole opening up? I think I'm being sucked into one._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Alfie pays half attention to the rest of his teacher's lecture on an art technique. He sneaks glances at Zoe. He's thrilled to be working with her for their art project. Her mind does wondrous things when it comes to assignments involving creativity.

The art project means that he'll will get to spend more time with her. They haven't spent a lot of time together without their friends around since middle school. Until now, his little boy crush on Zoe hasn't faded away. His feelings for her morphed from a naïve crush in elementary school to infatuation in middle school and absolute love in high school. When she went through puberty, he thought that she turned from a princess to a goddess. It was as if he was reliving the time that he discovered one of his dad's playboy magazines when he was 9. When he went through puberty, he remained as a prince. He didn't upgrade to a god. He has a five o'clock shadow that she teased made him look like a baby caveman.

Zoe's attention is on Mrs. Hamm. She has a blank expression on her face. He wonders what she's thinking about. _Maybe she's brainstorming on project ideas._

A half hour before the period ends, Mrs. Hamm gives everyone the rest of class time to continue on their self-portrait assignment. He can do the remainder of his self-portrait at home. All he wants to do for the rest of class is talk to his beloved.

He taps on Zoe's shoulder. "Hello partner."

She lets out a small squeak. "What? Huh?" She clears her throat. "Right. Project."

"So… any ideas?" _How about a love story about a prince that falls in love with a princess?_

"Not really. You?"

"Nope." Like a judge on a prestigious talent show, Mrs. Hamm looks for originality. It doesn't matter if the art piece is well-done. If the art piece doesn't pop out, then it lacks creativity. If he and Zoe went with his idea, Mrs. Hamm would throw their project in the trash.

 _"Creativity equals originality. If you aren't creative enough, then your voice isn't loud enough."_

Zoe sighs. "Let's not think about the project for now. I want to finish my self portrait first before…" She trails off.

"Before…?" _Before what! What did I miss?_

"Never mind." She opens her pencil case and takes out a mechanical pencil. _What? No! Don't leave me hanging, lady love!_

"Before…?" He says again. "What were you going to say?"

"Nothing," she brushes off. "It's nothing important."

"Lady love." _Before I kiss Alfie? Before I make sweet love to Alfie? BEFORE WHAT?_

"Alfs, drop it."

"No. Before what?" He still wants to hear what she has to say, even if it's rude. Incomplete thoughts are his pet peeve.

She glares at him. "Before I step on your toe for being an ass."

 _Whoa. Lady love is feisty today._ "Sorry love."

The glare disappears and she looks at him apologetically. "No, I'm sorry. I'm just stressed about the portrait. I dunno if I'll get it done on time."

"You're gonna finish," he assures her. She's capable of doing anything when she puts her heart into it. It's why she's the best artist that he knows. "Art is your thing. You can fail in any other class beside this one."

She rolls her eyes, but laughs. "Whatever. Now shut up and lemme do my portrait so I won't fail the one subject that I can ace."

Smiling, he opens his own sketchbook, turning to the page where his self-portrait is. _Oh love. If only you can open your eyes and see how much I love you._

* * *

 **So those were a little more details about how Zoe and Alfie's relationship work. Their love story will come along just like Phan. Think Hikari from the anime Special A and that's how Zoe's feelings toward Alfie is like.**

 **Who has played Cards Against Humanity? It's supposed to be such a dirty game, but I actually played it with a bunch of my friends in high school during our lunch breaks, and we're all a bunch of nerds. Even my friends' English teacher played with us once, and she won more cards than us that day lol. I thank Mona for buying it off Amazon, bringing it to school, and letting me live my dream to play it since I first saw Smosh Games do a Game Bang on it.**

 **~ AA**


	6. Dances and a Music Store

Chapter 6: Dances and a Music Store

Haiku

 _A song and a dance_

 _New friends and a stolen look_

 _When words fail, music speaks_

* * *

It's three days before Halloween. Dan and Phil are at a Savers store looking through a selection of Halloween costumes for their school's annual Halloween dance. Phil already has a costume that he wants to wear. Dan outgrew his dinosaur costume - he hadn't worn it since he stopped trick-or-treating in 5th grade.

After a lot of begging from Joe, the group chose to go to the Halloween dance with their freshman friend. The only major school social events they go to is banquets, but Joe wants to have the full high school experience and asked to do one holiday dance for the school year. Joe's favorite holiday is Halloween, hence the reason why Phil is helping Dan find a costume on such short notice.

"All the good costumes are gone," Dan grumbles. "All I see are capes and masks. I don't even like the supernatural stuff." Dan is terrified of any supernatural creature. Phil loves watching horror movies, so it's a shame that he can't watch a horror movie with Dan without the likely possibility of him having nightmares afterward.

"We'll find something," Phil reassures. If they can't find a good costume, their last resort is to use a roll of toilet paper to turn Dan into a mummy. "On the bright side, Halloween is almost here and costumes are on sale."

"True," Dan agrees. "I wish I could've bought a costume on eBay."

"Me too."

"You're lucky. You got your Pikachu onesie."

Phil laughs. He and Fiona received Pokemon onesies from PJ as Christmas gifts; his onesie is a Pikachu, and her onesie is a Charmander. When the group agreed to attend the Halloween dance, the twins went to their closets, took out their onesies, and declared the cotton clothing as their costumes. They didn't care if they'd look out of place – at least they'll be dressed in comfort.

"Are you planning to go to the dance with a date?" Phil asks. PJ is going with Christy. Louise is going with Matt. Alfie tried to ask Zoe, but she turned him down and said "ask me that question when I'm interested."

Dan shakes his head. "There's no one I'm really into." He holds out a pirate costume. "Think I'd be a good pirate Dan?"

"Argh," Phil answers. _Dan How-argh-ell. Wow that was a bad Phil pun._ "That means yes."

Dan chuckles. "I'll put this in the maybe pile." He puts it back on the rack. "Did you find a date?"

 _Who needs a date when I got my friends?_ "Nah. I'd rather go solo and have a fun time with you guys than be with a girl I'll ditch within the first hour."

"Are you sure? Is there no hot girl in your radar?"

 _The hottest girl I want is Sarah Michelle Gellar._ "The only hot girls I'm aware of is my sister, my friend's crush, and a friend interested in another guy. So no."

"Really." The next costume Dan holds out is a cowboy costume. "Cowboy Dan?"

 _Dan "The West" Howell… no that was worst than the pirate pun._ "Hmmm… you do love Cowboy Bebop."

"Which is like one of the best anime ever." Dan looks at the price tag. "20 dollars." He grins. "Cowboy Dan it is." Cowboy Dan. Phil wonders how vivid Fiona's dreams will be when she sees Dan dressed as a cowboy.

Phil isn't giving up on his master plan. Fiona and Dan doesn't are going to the dance solo. Phil got them alone once. He can do it again. After all, the dance is a perfect event to unleash the next moment of his plan: a Fan dance.

* * *

~:~

* * *

The school's Halloween dance is in full swing. Zoe, dressed in her fairy costume, is at the refreshments station. She's enjoying the dance far more than she expected. The student council's music has the majority of students on the dance floor, the party games brought a laugh to all the gym's occupants, and the abundance of food has students coming back for more. She and her friends are having a fun time, so she'll be thanking her brother later for convincing them to come.

She grabs a can of Arizona green tea from the refreshments table and walks over to an empty space next to a trash bin near the back of the gym. Opening the drink, she takes a few sips, watching her friends dancing to a dubstep remix of a pop song. Once the song ends, Alex, a senior and the DJ for any school dance (including prom), announces that he has two special songs that he'll play next.

"Let's change things up! Everyone grab a partner. It's time to slow things up." She shakes her head, laughing to herself. She knew this was coming. It isn't a dance until Alex plays a slow song. _That dude needs to get laid._

Students start to partner up. Louise and Matt. PJ and Christy. Joe and a blonde-haired girl that she doesn't know. She sees Phil talking to Dan and Fiona. Fiona blushes. Dan looks at Phil. The brown-haired teen shrugs, nods, and takes Fiona's hand, joining all the other pairs on the dance floor. _Dan and Fiona? Holy shit, what if they get together? That would be so cool! Maybe then they'll stop shipping Zalfie and ship… Diona? Diona! Dan and Fiona's ship name would be Diona._

As the music starts, she spots Alfie, dressed in his Spiderman costume, leave the crowd and approach her. "Hi love."

"Hey Alfs." _Hey universe! Did I not say I wanted Zalfie to be el zippo?_

His eyes glimmer with hope. "Wanna dance?"

 _ **Take my hand, I'll teach you to dance**_

 _ **I'll spin you around, won't let you fall down**_

 _ **Would you let me lead, you can step on my feet**_

 _ **Give it a try, it'll be alright**_

She gestures to her half-empty can. "I'm not done with this."

"Finish it later."

"There's no place to put it down."

"Then let me finish it." He yanks the can away from her hand and gulps down the rest of the drink.

 _Gross!_ "Alfie! That was mine."

Once he finishes the drink, he tosses it into the trash bin. "You can get another one later." He steps closer. "It's one dance, Zoe."

"Alfs…" _Didn't I turn you down to be my date? If I said no to that, what makes you think I'll say yes to slow dance with you?_

"You said no when I asked you to dance at our freshman and sophomore banquets. You turned me down to be my date for the dance." He gazes at her with puppy dog eyes. "This is the least you can do for me. It's one dance. You can even step on my feet if you want."

 _Don't you understand?_ This isn't just a dance. She was fine dancing with him earlier. The songs played had faster beats. Fast songs are meant to be about letting loose. With slow songs, a line is drawn. Slow songs are another word for love songs. She doesn't love Alfie. She only loves him as a friend. Friends don't dance to slow songs.

 _ **Cause lovers dance when they're feeling in love**_

 _ **Spotlight's shining, it's all about us**_

 _ **It's all, about us**_

 _ **And every heart in the room will melt**_

 _ **This is a feeling I never felt**_

 _ **But it's all about us**_

 _Fuck it. Maybe if I say yes, he'll shut up._ "One dance." _I'm gonna regret this._ "If I dance with you, don't ask me to dance during prom or any other time during the rest of the school year."

He grins, his face instantly lighting up.. "Deal!"

She reluctantly grabs his hand, ignoring the annoyance bubbling in her stomach. _Is it too late to ask for Phil to bail me out so I can dance with him instead?_

* * *

~:~

* * *

Phil stands at the side of the gym. The last chorus of All About Us by He is We is playing. He's keeping an eye on Dan and Fiona. He doesn't care that he's the only one out of his group of friends that's not dancing. Dancing to slow songs aren't his forte.

His eyes scan the room. Louise, in her ladybug costume, twirls around while holding Matt's hand. PJ, in his demon costume, spins Christy in his arms. Joe, in his Captain America costume, kisses his blonde-haired partner's cheek. Dan and Fiona are still rocking slowly back and forth, his arms around her waist and her hands on his shoulders. Zoe steps on Alfie's feet, which causes Alfie to grimace and Phil to laugh. _Zoe, it'll only be a matter of time before you wake up one day wanting to kiss Alfs than hit him._

The song ends and the room bursts into cheers. Alex beams at the crowd. "Thank you, thank you! I still see some of you not dancing, so this is your last chance to join in. Grab a guy, a gal, or a mop. This is one of my personal favorites. Here's I Dare You to Move by Switchfoot."

As the beginning notes of I Dare You to Move plays, a few pairs walk away from the dance floor, including Zoe and Alfie. Zoe is wearing a relieved expression, while Alfie is still smiling and limping behind her.

"Fuck, my feet are sore," Alfie groans once he and Zoe join Phil.

"That was part of the deal," Zoe retorts. She directs her attention to Phil. "Are you sure you don't want to dance, Phil?"

"I'm fine." _I'll be the one stepping on her toes, and not on purpose._

"I can dance with you. I don't want you to be the odd man out."

"Zoe, I'll be the odd man out if I go out there and fall flat on my face." _I don't wanna be the next internet sensation and be forever known as the boy with two left feet._

"Nonsense!" She tugs on Phil's arm. "If Alfie didn't ask me to dance, I would've danced with you."

"You're cheating on me with Phil? I'm hurt," Alfie says in a mocking tone.

Zoe glares at Alfie. "You want me to step on your toe again?"

"No."

"Then shut up."

"Zoe, you don't have to," Phil implores. _Do I have any escape options? Maybe I can bolt for the door._

"Too late." She drags Phil onto the dance floor, stopping when they are a few feet away from Dan and Fiona. "I suffered enough with Alfie. I need to dance with someone that doesn't want to make me hurl."

"We're the world's worst dancers," he tells her. _If there was an Olympic sport for cringeworthy dancing, we'd be the experts._

She giggles. "We'll embarrass ourselves together." She puts her hand on his shoulders. "Follow my lead."

 ** _I dare you to move, I dare you to move_**

 _ **I dare you to lift yourself off out of the floor**_

 _ **I dare you to move, I dare you to move**_

 _ **Like today never happened, today never happened before**_

Miraculously, when they dance, his clumsiness doesn't make a scene in front of the dozens of students in the gym. He and Zoe joke that they dance better to fast songs than slow songs. No one cares what happens when dancing to a fast song until you start to dance like a chicken. But when you dances to a slow song, you can feel everyone's eyes on you. If you make a mistake, everyone will be able to catch it.

"Thanks for dancing with me," Zoe says softly to Phil. "When Alfie asked me to dance, I was about to go to you instead just to get out of it."

"You still danced with him though." _You had a choice to decline. Are you saying that you did want to dance with him?_

"I was being nice. It was a way to get him off my back."

"You could have said no," he points out.

"I could... but if I did, he would have asked again at prom."

 _Good point._ When it comes to Zoe, Alfie is persistent to get Zoe to do things for him. He still remembers the time when they were in 8th grade and Zoe agreed to go with Alfie to check out a supposedly haunted house on the other side of town. "True."

She peeks over his shoulder. "Dan's staring at you."

"What?"

"Shush." She circles them so he's facing Dan and Fiona. "Be inconspicuous."

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Dan making subtle glances at him and Zoe. He's confused. Why is Dan looking at him? Dan should be looking at Fiona. He specifically made convinced Dan to dance with Fiona so they could be closer. _Don't look at me! Look at your future girlfriend!_

Zoe smirks. "If I didn't know better, I think Dan likes you."

Phil scoffs. _I don't have the face of a Calvin Klein model._ "Dan isn't interested in anyone. Much less me."

"Are you sure? He could be dropping some hints."

"Zoe, he doesn't like anyone. He told me that while we were shopping for his Halloween costume."

She raises an eyebrow. "He told you that? Why didn't he mention it to us?"

He shrugs. "He might bring it up later on." If Phil's friends ask Dan about his nonexistent love life, he'll probably tell them.

"It must mean something if he told you first," she says thoughtfully.

He shakes his head. "We're good friends. I'm sure he would have told any of you if it wasn't me."

It doesn't mean anything. It's normal for friends to look at each other as often as they want. It would be strange if they averted their eyes from each other most of the time. They aren't in Japan. Friends can look at each other as many times as they want, as long as your stare doesn't linger too long that it becomes borderline creepy.

Phil looks at Dan. The brunette boy smiles at him. Phil smiles back.

 _We're friends. Just friends. Nothing more, nothing less._

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's mid-morning on a crisp fall day of a Saturday in the middle of November. Dan and Phil have gotten off a city bus and are heading to Dillion's Music Factory, a small music store at a far side of the city. Once they reach the store, Phil opens the entrance's glass door, a dinging sound signaling their arrival. Dan marvels at their surroundings as they walk into the store.

"I know," Phil says. "That was my reaction when my dad took me here for the first time when I was six."

Dillion's is the music store for Phil's music needs. The local store is where his dad took him and Fiona all the time when they were younger. The twins prefer the old-fashioned way of purchasing CD's at a music store over buying music on iTunes. It's their simple way to keep vintage customs alive in a world that rapidly advances and leaves behind nostalgic traditions. Plus, it's an easy escape for him whenever he needs to get away his house.

Now it's Dan turn to experience one of Phil's early happy childhood memories. It's nice for him to have one-on-one time with Dan when he's not scheming for his master plan. Fiona, Louise, and Zoe are doing a charity event for Key Club. Alfie and PJ are helping Joe study for a math test (math is Joe's weakest subject). Since Dan and Phil didn't have particular plans to do today, Phil decided to make use of their spare time to bring Dan to Dillion's.

"Why haven't I heard of this place?" Dan breathes. "I think I'm in music heaven."

"Couldn't agree with you more." Phil leads Dan to the aisle labeled 'ROCK.' "This place is popular for music lovers that grow up here."

"So your dad knew this place."

 _Knew? This place was around when grandpa was alive. Music mattered to my dad's side._ "He lived for Dillion's. It's where he met mom."

"Your mom, huh?" Dan thumbs through the artists on the 'A' section. "She a music lover too?"

"Sort of. From what dad told me, mom was only at Dillion's to pick up a birthday gift for her friend when they met." _Though there could be more to the story that dad didn't tell me._

"Two people meeting at a music store. That's a pretty good start to a love story."

"Yeah… A love story doomed to fail from the very start," Phil mutters.

Dan picks up an All Time Low CD. "My mom and dad met at a classy restaurant. Dad was their waiter when my mom was eating dinner with her family."

"Aw, that's cute." _Beats the beginning of my mom and dad's love story, minus the love._

Dan smiles. "It gets cuter." He reaches the 'M' section. "He couldn't stop thinking about the 'red hair beauty,' which my dad nicknamed my mom as since he didn't know her name when he served her. He thought he wasn't ever going to see her again till she came to eat at the same restaurant again about a month later. Dad made sure to get her number that time."

 _Whoa. Talk about luck and meant to be._ "Sounds like the plot to a romance flick."

"It does, doesn't it?," Dan says fondly. "He gets her number, they fall in love, got married, and had me and Adrian."

 _Now that's a love story._ "So how did they fall out of love?"

"I don't know." Dan takes out a Muse CD. The cover reveals that it's the band's newest album. Phil bought the album last week when he came to Dillion's last weekend. "It happens with some married couples, I guess. The love is there one moment, gone the next. The flame dies after a while."

 _Or in my case, a fire that keep raging on._ "At least you know there was a fire." He grew up with the reality that his parents didn't love each other. He was used to the idea that love wasn't for everyone. While Fiona didn't mind crushing from one boy to the next, he didn't keep his heart on a sleeve. His heart is in a cage. When he falls in love, it will be when he knows that the person he wants to be with has the right key to unlock the cage and set his heart free.

Dan looks through the 'S' section. "Music talks about love all the time. People describe it as the feeling when the person you love will either be your entire world or the one that'll fuck everything up." He holds out the All Time Low and Muse CD, with the addition of another CD of a band called Secondhand Serenade. "But then there's rock. Rock perceives love in a realistic way. It covers the best and worst things about love. It sees love in any perspective and shows that love will always be a part of someone's life, whether you get the good or shitty end of it."

The two boys walk away from the rock aisle and move on to the 'SOUNDTRACK' aisle. Phil mulls over Dan's words. Dan is right about rock music - Phil loves rock for similar reasons. When he listens to rock, he has a personal connection to the genre more than other types of music. Rock isn't only a stress reliever; it's also a coping mechanism. When he listens to rock, he's listening to a sound that resonates into his soul. The way he falls in love with rock is how he wants to fall in love with a person. He wants the kind of love that touches him to the core. He wants words that's powerful enough to break down the barrier that protects his heart.

"Rock is real than any other kind of music," he tells Dan. "I'm disappointed it doesn't have as much appreciation." _Why else do I shake my head at people who think Nickelback isn't a good band? It's better than some of the hip-hop music that does nothing but use cuss words these days._

"Rock is for the people that knows good music."

Phil nods in agreement. "Which is why we're friends."

"Best friends," Dan clarifies. "You, Fiona, and the rest of your friends are all my best friends now."

"Best friends," Phil echoes. "You're my best friend too." He and Dan clicked from the first time they met. They developed a closeness that he only has with his sister and his six friends. Dan gets him at a level that only the two of them can share. Their connection is a telephone that never has awful reception.

Phil points to the three CD's in Dan's hand. "Are you going to buy those?"

"Uh-huh. I gotta get back to building my music collection."

They head to the registrar, which is run by a girl with blonde hair and purple highlights. Phil had only seen her last week when he bought his Muse album. He thinks that she's a new worker.

"Hello." She grins at the two of them. Her nametag is printed with the name 'Summer.' "Did you two find everything okay?"

"Uh-huh," Dan answers.

"Awesome." She scans the three CD's. "That'll be $68.34."

Dan reaches into the back pocket of his jeans and pulls out his wallet. He gives Summer a Visa credit card, who takes the plastic rectangular item. After a couple minutes, she gives Dan his credit card back and puts the CD's in a blue plastic bag with Dillion's logo on it.

She hands Dan the bag. "There you go. Have a nice day."

"You too," Dan and Phil say in unison.

She looks at them thoughtfully. "I don't mean to be rude, but are you two… you know… together?"

A blush rises on Phil's cheeks. Phil glances at Dan. His face starts to go red too.

"No," Dan replies meekly.

"Do we look like a couple?" Phil asks curiously. No one has ever asked him that question before when he's spending one-on-one time with Joe, PJ, or Alfie.

"Kind of." Summer flushes. "You two look kind of close and I had this sort of feeling that maybe there was something going on between you two."

Dan and Phil stare at each other. Do they look like two men in a relationship? Phil isn't necessarily gay, although he doesn't know if he's straight either. He views boys and girls the same. He knows when a boy or a girl is hot. It's why Fiona sometimes teases him that his "heart eyes" are under maintenance. Having a love life isn't a priority. All he cared about is having his friends and his sister. Dan mentioned his celebrity crush on Jennifer Lawrence once, so Phil assumed that his brunette friend is straight. It would be awkward between them if Phil developed feelings for Dan, only to be completely shot down by him.

"We're not together." Phil swings an arm across Dan's shoulders. "We do, however, have a tight bromance. Right Dan?"

"R-right," Dan stutters.

Summer laughs. "You two are adorable. I'm sorry I brought it up."

"It's okay," Dan assures her. The blush on his cheeks remains. "You're probably not the only one that thinks the same about Phil and I."

"Dan and Phil?" She brings up her hands. "I see it now. Phan."

Phil chuckles. _Guess two minds think alike._ "That's the ship name I dubbed too."

Dan and Phil. Is it possible people that see more between them than they think?

No. Phil's mission is to make Fan happen, not Phan. That was the reason why he made a Phil Master Plan. His plans are fail-proof. If he fails, he'll be failing Fiona and Dan.

If he fails, he'll risk the steady friendship growing between them.

If he fails, he'll be the reason for breaking his sister's heart.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Around five in the afternoon on the same day, Fiona blinks back exhaustion as she walks into a Best Buy store. She goes to the aisle where the different packages of laptop chargers are. She promised Martyn that she'd swing by at the large electronics store to buy him a New Macbook Pro charger after he misplaced his old one. _Bro, you lose the littlest things. First the bowtie, now your charger. Maybe I should buy a hidden camera so you can use it to find the stuff you keep losing._ She immediately finds what she's looking for and heads to the checkout area. However, she overhears a conversation that has her stopping halfway.

Two boys are at the laptop station, sampling the displayed laptops. One is a boy with brown hair in a bowl-like haircut and a slight scruff. The other is a boy with slightly disheveled black hair at a similar shade as hers and also has a slight scruff. Both boys look about the same age as her, if not a little older. _Holy shit, they're hot._

"You still want to check out the Apple Store?" brown hair asks black hair.

Black hair shakes his head. "I think it's time for a change. Besides, Windows isn't too bad."

"It is less expensive than Apple," brown hair agrees.

Fiona finds herself approaching the two boys. She doesn't typically approach strangers, but there's something about the boys that reminds her of Phil. "Ever consider the Surface Pro?"

The two boys' eyes land on Fiona. She notices that the brown-haired boy has blue eyes, while the black-haired boy has brown eyes. _Breathe, Fi. You like Dan._

"Do you have a Surface Pro?" brown hair questions.

"Yup. Helps me get my photoshopping needs done." She loves her Surface Pro 3. She was a little wary of it at first when her dad bought it for her and Phil as a birthday present when they were 14 to share to replace their old laptop. Phil's clumsiness had caused their old laptop to break when he carried it and tripped on one of his shirts lying that was lying on the floor. Now, she treats it as one of her most prized possessions. They have a Windows PC at home, although their parents make more use of it than Phil, Martyn, and Fiona.

Black hair raises an eyebrow. "You photoshop?"

"Memes. For fun." She has a tab on her Tumblr page dedicated to all the memes she designs on her spare time. One of her best works was a vintage-styled edit of a One Direction photo.

"I like doing memes too."

 _Yes! He likes doing memes too! Wait, what am I thinking? Focus! Black hair might be gay and brown hair might be his boyfriend!_ "Then get the Surface Pro. It's about the same price as a standard Windows laptop. It's easier to carry around too."

Black hair smiles. Wow. He has a nice smile. "I'll take it under consideration."

"You do that." She gestures to the laptop charger that she's holding. "I have to pay for this."

Black hair nods. "What's your name by the way?"

"Fiona."

"Hi Fiona. I'm Anthony. This is Ian."

Ian waves. "How old are you?"

"Sixteen." Are they in high school too?

"Cool. We're 19," Anthony comments. _Only three years older. That's not too bad._

They share a few more minutes of pleasant conversation. The few minutes turns into several more minutes. She's unable to stop talking to Ian and Anthony, who she learns are in their second year of college. Despite being cute boys, she can have a productive conversation with them, unlike some of the boys in her grade level. The boys are thrilled when Fiona tells them that she loves video games, and it's all they can talk about as the two college friends accompany her to the checkout and outside the door after she finishes paying for her charger.

She has to say goodbye to them when it's 6:00 PM. If she doesn't leave now, she'll be late for dinner. Her mom has a habit of scolding the twins if they arrive home late without telling her in advance where they went. Their mom hates when the siblings are out on the streets later than 7 o' clock at night. Martyn is an exception since he's in college and their mom has given up on disciplining their rambunctious, rascal older brother.

"Can we get your number?" Ian brings up when she tells them that she has to go home.

"Sure. Just call me whenever you wanna chat." She inputs her phone number in their phone numbers. In return, the two boys give her their phone number too.

"Believe me, I'd like to chat ASAP," Anthony while he puts his contact information in her phone.

When she says goodbye to them two minutes later, she no longer felt as exhausted than how she was before she entered Best Buy. It's a great end to her busy day. She bought Martyn's laptop charger and made a couple of new friends.

She has a good feeling about Ian and Anthony. There's something about them that makes her believe that they'll make her life a whole lot more interesting.

* * *

 **Sorry for no Phan moments in the last chapter! I hope I made up for that in this chapter. I was very excited to get this one out. Starting from this chapter and onwards, the story will pick up the pace.**

 **I think I kept you waiting long enough for the intro of Ian and Anthony. I couldn't just add them in the story with no reason, right? I knew I wanted them to be college students, though it took me so while to figure out how and where Fiona would meet them.**

 **The Smosh duo is the reason why I started watching YouTube videos, so I had to include them in the story. They're gonna have an important involvement regarding Fiona later on. I love their vids on their second channel, and who misses the weekly Lunchtime with Smosh episodes? I know people give a lot of shit to the Smosh Squad, which is downright stupid because I think they're funny. Out of the five of them, I relate to Noah the most since I too am a picky ass eater and lack any athletic abilities. xD**

 **Anyway, next chapter is the chapter I'm eager for you guys to read. So see you next Monday!**

 **~ AA**


	7. Chance Encounters and a Motorcycle

Chapter 7: Chance Encounters and a Motorcycle

Haiku

 _It comes when it comes_

 _Don't try to fight the feeling_

 _Fate is what it is_

* * *

It's a school night at the Lester household. A man slams the front door without a glance toward his wife. She knows that her husband's anger has reached another high peak. When he's mad, he can't stay in the house. The more that he looks at her, the more likely that his hypothetical fists of fury can become literal. He isn't a violent man. After 17 years married to him, he has never once laid a punch on her. They'll slap each other, but nothing to leave a serious bruise. But that can change at any moment. Life isn't always predictable, and that includes his actions.

Susan rubs her temple, staring at the window to the left of the front door. Johnathan will be back in a few hours. He needs time for his anger to dissipate. It's safer for her and her kids. She would rather have her husband hit her than Martyn and the twins.

 _He's wrong. I'm right. I'm always right._ He disagrees with most of the house's rules. She believes that he's too lenient, letting the kids do what they want. When she looks at Martyn, she thinks that she failed him; she's lucky that his disobedience hasn't brought home an F. _At least Phil and Fiona bring home A's and B's._ The twins listen to her and their friends haven't pressured them to get tattoos or piercings.

She and Johnathan have a difficult time working out their problems. They "half-ass" them, a term that she has gotten the habit of saying because of Martyn. Leaving them alone could be worse, because it would make them miserable than they already are. If they don't vent out their frustrations, they wouldn't be decent role models to their kids. Their children come first before anything else.

The kids mean everything to her. She doesn't want them to end up like her and be stuck in a one-sided marriage.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Somewhere in a bar at a run-down side of the city, Johnathan is sitting at a bar stool. The redundant hip-hop music tears through his ears and his head falls in a cloudy fog. The liquor burns his throat, and he takes another big gulp from his glass. He's a bit drunk, though his drunkenness won't hinder him from driving home safely. Bars are the only way that he can escape his broken marriage.

 _That bitch._ The ungrateful term is the only way that he can describe Susan. He's tired of the way that she thinks that her ways are always the right way. He doesn't blame Martyn for being the way he is. Martyn rebelled against her, just like him. He wishes that he allowed his oldest son to dorm at his college. He hopes that Martyn will move out as soon as possible; his son deserves to start a new life far away from his home.

He calls out to the bartender and orders another drink. Last drink before I go home.

"Had a rough day?" He rotates in his seat. A woman with shoulder length auburn hair and gray eyes is looking at him, warmly smiling at him.

 _Miss, if only you knew._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Tonight is a night to unwind for the red-haired woman. Her husband suggested that she should go for a night out after she worked tirelessly on a project for her latest client. Taking his suggestions, she called two of her friends for a girls night out. It's the first time that they are spending time together like this. With kids and each being mothers, the married women don't have a lot of mutual free time to spend together.

Tabitha is happy that she met Eliza Sugg and Erica Pentland. They each have kids that have befriended their son. Aside from the kids of her friends, she has met the rest of Dan's friends. She's particularly fond of Phil and Fiona, who gave quite a memorable performance during their karaoke session when she first met them. She wishes that she can meet their parents, though Dan has told her that the twins have a situation at home that won't allow her to meet their parents until further notice.

When she reaches the bar, she waves to the bartender and orders a martini. While waiting for her order, she glances to the man sitting next to her. The man has ruffled black hair, light blue eyes, and a slight scruff, and he looks incredibly stressed.

"Had a rough day?" she asks him. The man turns to her. Up close, she notices the man's handsome features. _Whoa… eh, so what if you're married. You can look without touching._

"If only you knew," he mutters.

"Want to talk about it?" She's the kind of woman that can tell when a person at a bar is having a rough time. Over the years, she has talked to people with problems ranging from stress at work to being financially broke. She learned that communication between strangers can be an effective solution to momentarily forget about problems that life throws at people.

"You're the first to ask that tonight."

"I thought you could use a little company." She peers down at his hands. He has a wedding ring on his ring finger. _Perhaps something happened with his wife._

"I think I do." The bartender pushes their orders to them. "I'm Johnathan."

"Nice to meet you. I'm Tabitha." She drags her drink closer to her. "The night is young. What would you like to talk about?"

"Hmmm… you're married, right?"

"Nineteen years." _Nineteen years with my wonderful Simon._

"Nineteen. Impressive."

 _That's what everyone says._ "How long have you been married?"

"Seventeen." _His wife must have really fucked something up if she's the reason why he's here._

She takes a sip of her martini. "Not bad. Do you have kids?"

"Three. Two of them are twins."

 _That's ironic!_ "Wow! Really? My son has friends that are twins."

A hint of a smile appears on his face. "What a small world."

"I haven't been here long, actually. My husband started his new job here about three months ago."

"What does he do?"

"He works at a law firm. You?"

"I'm a hotel manager."

The small talk progresses to a light conversation. They discuss our careers and share more about themselves. In the midst of their conversation, Eliza and Erica approached the pair to tell Tabitha that they were leaving. After a quick goodbye, the two mothers left the bar. The adults return to the topic of their kids.

"What are the names of your sons?" Johnathan asks.

"Daniel, or Dan since that's what's he likes to be called, is my oldest. He's 16. Adrian is 12." _Simon and I can always go for a third._

"The twins have a friend named Dan."

 _The irony continues._ "What are the names of your twins?"

"Phillip, or Phil for short, and Fiona."

She gasps. _Is he joking?_ "Lester?"

He looks at her in confusion. "Yes."

Johnathan.

Johnathan Lester.

 _This is the father of Dan's friends._ "My name is Tabitha Howell. I think our kids are friends."

He laughs. "This really is a small world."

The two share stories about their children. The revelation of their kids already familiar with each other is a genuine surprise. She never anticipated to meet Phil and Fiona's father in this scenario. She expected to meet him under more proper terms.

The minutes tick away. By midnight, they are out on the streets, walking down the sidewalk as he walks her home. Johnathan is a great man and his wife is a lucky woman. But she's still curious about something: he hasn't told her the exact reason why he was at the bar. All he told her was that he needed time for himself. The man has children. _Isn't there a rule for near middle-aged men to prioritize family over alcohol?_

"It was nice talking to you," she tells Johnathan as they are walking along the block where her house is.

He grins. "You too. I had a great time, stranger."

"We're not strangers anymore," she says cheekily. "Especially since Dan, Phil, and Fiona are good friends."

"Then that means we'll see each other soon."

She nods. "Why don't we exchange phone numbers? Maybe we can meet up sometime and talk more." She gets lonesome being at home alone while Simon is at work.

"Of course. I like talking to you too." They input their numbers in each other's cell phones. By making a new acquaintance at a bar, she feels like a teenager all over again. I didn't expect the night to end quite like this.

"Can I ask you something before I go?" she questions hesitantly.

"What is it?"

 _It won't hurt to ask._ "Your wife… is she the reason you were at the bar?" He never brought up his wife's name. He knows the name of her husband, so it's fair to know his spouse's name in return.

A flash of sadness reaches Johnathan's eyes. _Oh no... I shouldn't have brought it up._ "Susan is a reason for why my whole life is a mess."

* * *

~:~

* * *

At a lamppost not too far away from the Howell residence, Johnathan explains his story with Susan to Tabitha. He tells her how they met, how he admired her confidence that later revealed her true shallow and narrow-minded personality. He tells her how his cowardice prevented him from dropping her as his friend, how he should have done so because it took one drunken night at a friend's party to ruin his life when he knocked up the blonde-haired pessimistic woman. He tells her how they kept the baby, how he promised to support their child, how he married her to appease their parents. He tells her how she was the one that chose to name their oldest child Martyn, even though he disliked the name, how he was happy when she allowed him to name one of the twins Phillip if she got to name the other twin Fiona. He tells her how he couldn't love her the way that he's supposed to, how he chose not to divorce his wife because he didn't want to abandon his three children, how they fight over their parenting styles because she's overprotective over their children and he knows that it's preventing them from achieving their full potential. He tells her how he cries himself to sleep sometimes, how he wishes that he could rewind time so he never met Susan. He tells her how he ended up at the bar tonight because it was another night that his wife was too much to handle and all he craved was a few hours to leave his problems behind.

Tabitha listens attentively. Johnathan is a blubbering mess when he finishes speaking. There are tears in his eyes threatening to spill at any second. _I_ _must look like a hoodlum._ He's taken aback when she kisses his cheek.

"What was that for?"

"For being honest." She raises a hand and her fingers pauses over his chest. She clutches the cotton cloth of his shirt. "I'm here for you. After what you told me, I'm restraining myself from doing unpleasant things to Susan."

"What are those unpleasant things?" _If you want to slap Susan, be my guest._

"You don't want to know."

He's astounded by Tabitha. His frustrations over Susan disappeared when he spoke to her at the bar. He poured his frustrations into a rant to a woman that he met a few hours ago. She listened to every word. She remained silent until he completed his long speech.

Why couldn't Susan be like Tabitha? Why didn't he marry someone that takes the time to simply listen to what he has to say, instead of finding a way to contradict his points? Why isn't Tabitha single? Why will he never have a chance to fall in love with Tabitha, a woman that he yearns for a chance to have a normal relationship with?

 _Life is just terribly cruel._

* * *

~:~

* * *

On a slow weekend on the fourth week of November, Dan listens to I Dare You to Move by Switchfoot on his laptop. Since the night of the Halloween dance, he likes to play the song on repeat whenever he's at home. The vibrant personality of Phil fascinated him since day one. He's attracted to Phil beyond his physical appearance, and he's falling hard for the raven-haired boy.

Dan's conversation with Summer at Dillion's stripped away a speck of doubt that he had about his chances of being with Phil. Summer saw a potential in something that he has dreams about every night. Phil is a charming young specimen, and Louise had mentioned that the girls who fancy Phil and tried to ask him out have all been turned down.

 _What does Phil want in a lover?_ According to Fiona, Phil has never had a girlfriend. Dan doesn't even know what Phil's sexuality is. He's bisexual, but it's a part of him that he hasn't brought up to the group yet. His sexuality is a piece of information that he doesn't give away to anyone.

His feelings for Phil has become one of his biggest secrets. Until he tells them that he plays for both teams, he doesn't want his friends to find out that he likes Phil. He's scared that he'll hurt Fiona, who he has been suspecting might have feelings for him. He isn't blind to her constant blushing around him. But he can tell that the female Lester twin hasn't tried to ask him out yet due to her own romantic fears. Even the prettiest of nerds aren't immune to being flabbergasted around their object of affection.

Fiona is Phil's sister. If Fiona indeed likes him, then pursuing Phil could risk ruining his friendship with all of his new friends.

* * *

~:~

* * *

He sits on the sofa at 1:43 PM with his phone pressed against his ear. After another fight with Susan, he forgoes his bedroom for the comfort of the living room. His family are all asleep, and it's this late in the night when he can have his secret phone calls with Tabitha.

"Hello?" the soothing voice of a woman says.

"Good evening, Tabitha."

Despite not being able to see her face, he can sense her smiling. "Hi, Johnathan."

His muscles relax. Hell may be upstairs, but heaven is just a phone call away.

* * *

~:~

* * *

She walks along the streets, on her way to meet the man that she met one fateful night at a bar two weeks ago. Tabitha and Johnathan's growing friendship has become their little secret. For Johnathan, he needs to keep her concealed from his family to avoid his wife's wrath. For Tabitha, she's saving Simon from possible jealousy, even if he is one of the most understanding people that she knows.

 _I can take her on any day._ Tabitha believes that Susan is a monster wife for belittling her husband. If Johnathan is wrong about something, Susan shouldn't be pretentious and drive her point further to prove herself. She's supposed to be a supportive spouse. _Her support is as dead as my childhood dinosaur toy._

Tabitha calls him every day. They text as often as they can, and those texts skyrocketing on nights after his arguments with Susan. When he calls, she can hear his hoarse voice. The yelling steals his voice and time for her to talk to someone that she's beginning to deeply care about.

He's just as elated as her during their communications. He tells her numerous times that she's his reason to being able to calm down when Susan gets on his nerves. Because of her, the violent side that he reigns in has become less apparent when he argues with his wife.

 _"All I have to do is think about you. With you on my mind, I remind myself that I'll be going to you as soon as I walk away from her."_

How long will they keep doing their secret meetings? With Johnathan being busy at work lately, they haven't been able to find time to meet for the last couple days. He has a day off tomorrow, so they are using this Saturday night to meet up.

She's glad to be a positive influence in Johnathan's life. No man should be morose for the rest of his existence. He used to be a happy man before he met the one that would turn his life into a downward spiral. If he can't have a strong marriage, then he can forge a strong friendship with her to make up for it.

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's 4:43 PM on a slow Tuesday afternoon on the week of Thanksgiving weekend at Leroy's. Minutes roll along as Phil watches Dan and Fiona chat about the next game that Dan should add in his video game collection. As a dedicated gamer, Fiona is always updated on the newest games, even keeping a word doc of a list of recommended video games for them to play in their Surface Pro.

Phil smiles at the warm exchange occurring between his sister and best friend. Fiona has been acting looser around Dan since the Halloween dance, talking to him without any prompting from Phil. Her blushing has been reduced to moments when she's away from Dan. To Phil, it's an improvement. Her ability to control her blushing allows her to behave more like a normal friend around Dan instead of the secret romantic that she is.

"Bro!" Fiona calls out. "Dan wants the newest Legend of Zelda."

"Got you covered, Fi." A shipment of the 3DS game came in last Friday and he too is eager to play it during his four-day break.

Once he grabs one copy of the game from the locked drawers, he hands it to Dan. The brunette teen beams at the sight of the game. He glances down at Fiona, then winks at her.

"I'll get to this as soon as I get home," he tells her.

"Good. When you do, tell me how far you got tomorrow."

He nods. "If I'm lucky, I might finish the main storyline by then."

"I doubt it."

"Wanna bet? I've done it for Pokemon X."

"You're on."

Phil stifles his chuckles. He'd like to see if Dan is capable of winning the bet.

 _If you can win the bet, then you can win my sister's heart too._

* * *

~:~

* * *

He walks out of his house on a weekday morning on a Monday after Thanksgiving weekend. For the last couple of days, Alfie has a pride and joy that has given him sweet rides. His dad had surprised him with his own motorcycle as a late birthday present. He thought that he heard a chorus singing hallelujah in the background the moment that he saw the glossy black vehicle. _Now if only my love can give me sweet rides too._

"Yo Alfs!" PJ calls out from across the street. PJ's house is directly across the street of Alfie, so the two friends are always walking to school together. "Mind if I hitch a ride with you to school?"

"Sure man!" He shouldn't be the only one to enjoy his new mode of transportation.

PJ grins, then jaywalks across the empty street. "Dude, you're going to blow everyone away when we get to school."

Alfie tosses the spare helmet to PJ. His dad bought two in case he wanted to ride the motorcycle with one of his friends. _The ladies will flock to me once I get to school._ "That's the plan."

"How do you think Zoe will react?"

"Stunned, that's for sure." _Stunned? She'll act as if she saw Marilyn Monroe's ghost._ They put their helmets on and situate themselves on the motorcycle's seats. He revs up the engine and in minutes, they are speeding down the block, on their way to school.

He can feel everyone's stares on him and PJ as he parks his motorcycle in the parking lot. With motorcycles getting as much appreciation as expensive cars, he thinks that he'll be a chick magnet for the rest of the school day.

Joe is agape when the two meet him and Zoe at the end of the parking lot. Joe is looking at them in bewilderment.

"When did you get a motorcycle?" Joe asks Alfie.

"During Thanksgiving," he replies. "It was dad's belated birthday gift."

"Shouldn't he have gotten you a car?" Zoe chimes in. "You do have a permit."

"He could have, but this baby comes a close second." Alfie looks at Zoe affectionately. "I named it, you know."

"Should I ask what kind of whimsical name you gave an inanimate object?"

He swings an arm across Zoe's shoulders. "Why, after my lady love of course. I named her Zoey." _It was either that or Mrs. Zoe Deyes._ The second name would make Zoe do a repeat performance of their slow dance at the Halloween dance.

"I'm flattered. Now get your arm away from me!" She ducks away from under his arm, moving to stand next to PJ.

PJ chuckles. "Did you actually name your motorcycle Zoey?"

"Yup." _Away from Zoe, it's Mrs. Zoe Deyes._

"Does that mean I get to take a ride on Zoey sometime?" Joe inquires.

"Any time, little man." Alfie waggles his eyebrows at Zoe. "You wanna take a spin on it with me?"

"Fuck off," she snarks.

PJ wolf-whistles. "Oh, some fucking can be done on a motorcycle all right."

She glares at PJ. "You can fuck off too."

"But you're coming over to my house later anyway to work on our project," Alfie tells Zoe.

"I can walk." No! Don't walk! Be my motorcycle dream girl!

"It'll be faster to ride with Alfie though!" Joe protests.

"Yeah Zoe." Alfie internally thanking Joe for his unintentional assistance. "I don't want my lady love to be tired."

"It's not a far walk from the school."

"Zoe. PJ rode with me and he had the time of his life," he persuades.

"Why yes I did," PJ comments.

"I don't want to bother you," Zoe reasons.

"Lady love, I don't want you to be hot and sweaty by the time you reach my house." He smirks. An image of a hot, sweaty Zoe wearing less clothes pops in his head. "On second thought, take that walk, love."

She groans. "If I ride on that stupid motorcycle with you after school, will that shut you up?"

He beams. It's the closest that he'll hear her say yes. "Knew you couldn't resist me, love."

* * *

~:~

* * *

Later that same day, Zoe walks with Louise and Fiona as they stroll along the school halls on the way to the parking lot. She's dreading to see the boy that she'll soon have to be in close proximity with. Her friends were awed when they saw his motorcycle, but to her, the vehicle is a burning reminder that she'll have to get on the death contraption with Alfie, a friend that irritates her 95% of the time. _Can I strangle him? Or at least ruin his motorcycle? I can do the latter option without being sent to jail. I could spray paint his motorcycle pink. He hates pink._

Louise sighs. "You're so lucky. You get to be the first girl that gets to ride on Alfs' motorcycle."

"That deserves some laid points," Fiona jokes. _Me getting Alfie laid? Uh, no thanks. If he wants to get laid, he can get laid with any of the girls waiting in the line of desperados._

"It's one ride," Zoe grumbles. "He already gave one to PJ, so it doesn't matter."

"PJ's a guy," Louise points out. "Isn't it every girl's dream to ride a motorcycle being driven with a hot guy?"

 _Alfie is hot, but not my kind of hot._ "It is if that hot guy isn't Alfie."

Alfie is waiting next to his motorcycle when the three of them reach the parking lot, a wide grin on his face. He makes a sweeping motion to his motorcycle. "Your chariot awaits."

Zoe rolls her eyes. "It's the 21st century. And this isn't Cinderella."

"Had to try." He hands her a helmet. "Safety first."

"Thank you," she says sardonically, watching him sit down on the motorcycle. She puts the helmet on and sits behind him.

Fiona eyes them mischievously. "Do I smell a Zalfie moment?"

 _The only thing I smell is a Alfs' cologne._ "Girl, if you're smelling something, it's the trash dump over there."

He turns his head to look at her. "I don't know. I'm feeling the love."

"Drive, slave." _More like drive, dunderhead._

Alfie's eyes lights up. "I am a slave for you, lady love." _Ugh… should've went with dunderhead._

She wrap her arms around his waist. She can't believe she's doing this. They are in public. She doesn't know how she'll be able to deal with the gossip about them tomorrow.

Her hair whips in her face as he accelerates out the gated entrance and onto the busy road. In the back of her mind, she's excited about riding on a motorcycle. If it's cool watching people ride motorcycles on TV, it's cooler to do it in real life.

She closes her eyes. She feels better when she doesn't think about the fact that Alfie is the vehicle's driver. She leans her head forward and buries her face on his back, the cotton of his t-shirt against her helmet. She wishes she can stay in this moment. They aren't even on a highway. If she wasn't scared about falling off the motorcycle, she'd raise her hands in the air and shout in glee.

A few minutes later, the motorcycle slows down, then comes to a complete halt. She opens her eyes and lean back.

"We're here, lady love."

She jumps off, staggering slightly. _Blood, why aren't you in my legs?_

"Whoa." Alfie jumps off and helps to steady her. "Don't worry Zoe. My legs were a bit shaky too when I went on my first ride."

She takes off the helmet. Alfie does too. When she looks at his face, there's a slight knot in her stomach. _What the fuck?_

"Feeling that adrenaline rush?" The knot in her stomach doesn't go away. "Zoe?"

She blinks. A bead of sweat falls from her forehead. "I-I-I…"

"Adrenaline rush," he confirms. He grabs her helmet. "Let's go inside and get something to drink. It'll help your head."

She nods. She follows him into his house.

First was the sleepover. Now it's a motorcycle.

 _Can someone tell me what the hell this means?_

* * *

~:~

* * *

On the first weekend of December, four boys are having their usual gaming weekend at the Liguori residence, munching down on the food that they ordered from Taco Bell. Dan is absent since he's at one of his classmates' houses. As usual, Alfie is venting about his unconditional love for a girl that he has had his eye on for years.

 _Alfie needs to grow some balls. I mean, he already has a pair, but he needs to make some use of it. Is Viagra for balls in the works? If it is, Alfie should be a beta tester._ He cringes. _On second thought, two round bulges in the front of Alfie's jeans would only make the situation more weirder than it already is._ It'll be weird for PJ and everyone else in the world who would be unfortunate to see Alfie's literal life-sized balls.

"Just tell her how you feel," Phil says, his eyes still glued to the TV as he and Joe are playing Splatoon. "If you don't say anything, you'll never know."

"Easy for you to say," Alfie complains. "You aren't in love with anyone."

"Even if I was, I'd still tell you the same thing."

"Yeah right."

"I would! Honesty is the best policy."

"That's for work, not for real life."

"I'm on Phil on this." PJ sips from the medium-sized fountain drink that he ordered with his burrito. "Zoe thinks you tease her all the time for your amusement. I know you'd tease her even if you didn't love her, but there's a difference between normal teasing and I-want-to-have-your-babies teasing."

Alfie sighs. "Zalfie babies. I bet they'd turn out great."

Joe shudders. "Dude, that made me think of you knocking up my sister. Where's the bleach?"

"There's some in the bathroom," PJ quips. I _think I need some bleach too._

Alfie groans. "Not funny! I don't know if she's playing games with me or if she's really, really blind."

"Zoe is stubborn as heck," Joe agrees.

PJ takes a bite of his burrito. "I'm gonna go on a limb and say that if you don't tell her, Zoe will figure it out herself eventually. Either way, she'll someday know how you feel about her."

"Not if I keep doing what I'm doing. She hasn't figured anything out yet," Alfie points out.

"And if she does figure it out?"

"Then I'll ask her to be my Lady Love for the rest of my life."

"That's sweet and creepy at the same time." _Still better than that romance flick Joe made us watch last week._ "You're making a confession, not a proposal."

"So we're at a dilemma." Phil and Joe finish their round of Splatoon. Phil reaches for the remote and turns off the TV. "Either Alfie tells Zoe he loves her, or he keeps his mouth shut and hope she'll be the one to say she loves Alfie."

Alfie's eyes turn dream-like. "'I love you, Alfie.' God, you have no idea how much I want to hear her say those words."

"And you will if you just tell her," Phil reasons. "If you don't, what will happen if she starts dating another guy? You'll end up regretting not saying anything. Remember Jack?"

Joe rolls his eyes. "I think Jack would've turned Fiona down anyway, even if he didn't get together with Candice."

Phil shrugs. "Point is, you can't sit around living on hope that Zoe will be the one to run to you. Zoe is as dense as Ash Ketchum. She won't take a hint unless you tell it to her straight."

"Like Fiona is with Dan?" PJ brings up. He has a feeling that Alfie isn't the only one who has feelings for someone in the group. "Because I have a feeling your sister's latest crush is Dan." Fi's transparent when it comes to her crushes.

Joe raises his eyebrow. "Really? I couldn't tell."

Phil leans back on the couch. "Yes. But don't tell her you know. The only ones who know besides me is Zoe and Louise."

Alfie finishes the rest of his taco. "Dan and Fiona? Er… I don't see it."

"But I see it with you and Zoe!" PJ exclaims, switching the topic. He doesn't want Phil to worry too much over Alfie's comment now. This is about Alfie and Zoe, not Dan and Fiona.

"I see it, but she doesn't," Alfie grumbles.

"She will if you're straightforward. It's better to have loved than to never have loved at all."

"Peej, I'm relaxing, not at school."

"We're schooling you in the art of love," Phil jumps in. "If you want to win Zoe's heart, the best way to do so is to go out there and say 'I love you.'"

"And if she says no?"

"At least you tried."

Alfie fidgets with a loose thread on a couch pillow. "I'll tell her. Just not now. I'm not ready."

"When will you be ready?" PJ inquires.

"When I can say 'I love you' and not cry in front of her if she doesn't love me back."

Alfie truly loves Zoe. She's his priority. If Zoe rejects him, there's no telling what will happen to Zoe. He has been chasing after her since they were in elementary school.

As his best friend, PJ doesn't want to see Alfie lose a girl that he knows is the only one for him.

* * *

 **5k! Longest chapter so far. How did you like the names of the Lester and Howell parents? I had to include the Sims 4 gang in there somehow. I've never seen a phanfic incorporate the names of the avatars in Dan and Phil's Sims videos, so this is my way of paying tribute to those characters. Dil, Tabitha, Johnathan the minnow… they're all a part of the phandom an I anted them to feel at home in the fanfic world too.**

 **Btw who loved Dilitha's wedding video? One of these days, I'm sure Mia Yang will do her job as caterer lol. If this is what Dan and Phil are like during a Sims wedding, imagine if it was a Phan wedding. I can hear the screaming phangirls (me included) already.**

 **I used the name Simon for Mr. Howell as a reference to Simon the shrimp. It was either that or Kanye, but I think that would've been too weird. xD In upcoming chapters, I will be using their first names so I won't to keep using terms like Mr/Mrs. (last name of character) or his/her mom/dad, which I wanna use only during dialogue.**

 **~ AA**


	8. Suspicions and a Concert

Chapter 8: Suspicions and a Concert

Haiku

 _As the music plays_

 _Our heartbeats will synchronize_

 _When we're side by side_

* * *

It's after school on the second week of December. Phil is standing next to his locker, waiting for Dan to arrive. Dan texted him last night to meet at the lockers. Whatever Dan's hidden agenda is, he hopes that it doesn't involve anything scary like cliff-jumping or eating cheese. Cheese tops his list of fears and hates, next to bananas.

Dan has a huge smile on his face when Phil arrives at the lockers. Phil waves at Dan. "Hey."

Dan's smile doesn't fade. "Hey."

 _Whatever Dan wants me here for must be really exciting._ "You're really happy."

"I am." Dan removes one strap of his backpack. He opens one of his backpack's side pockets and pulls out a blue envelope. "This is for you."

"For me?" Phil grabs the envelope. "What's the occasion?"

"Well… Christmas is a couple weeks ago and I gotta give your gift early."

"Really? Why?"

"Open it. I had to give your gift ahead of time so we can make the best of it."

"We?" _Maybe we might be sky-diving. Is he? No! I'll pee my pants if it is._

"The gift is for both of us," Dan says sheepishly.

Puzzled, Phil tears through the flap of the envelope. Inside is a single concert ticket. His eyes lock on the artist's name printed in bold letters. _No fricking way._ "You bought me a ticket for Muse's concert!"

Dan nods, the smile on his face growing bigger. "Merry Christmas, Phil."

Phil mirrors Dan's smile, resisting his natural reaction to jump up and down like a little boy that got his favorite toy for his birthday. This is what Dan had in mind for a Christmas gift for him? It's more than a Christmas gift; it's as if Dan bought a house for him. Houses are expensive, but concert tickets aren't cheap either.

His hometown is one of Muse's stops for their world tour. He was thinking about going to the concert, but he didn't have enough money saved to purchase a ticket for Dan too. Phil didn't want to go to the concert alone. He wouldn't have a fun time without his rock buddy.

"So you're going too? Where'd you get the money?" Dan doesn't have a job yet, and he occasionally mentions that he'll start job-hunting next semester.

"Let's just say I saved up a lot of money before I moved here."

Dan must really love saving money. Phil isn't stringent with cash, although he doesn't set aside too much of his work money. He uses it on birthday presents for his friends, food and movie tickets for when he's hanging out with his friends, and personal items such as video games and music albums. At least he's faring better than Fiona when it comes to saving money. He has to help her prioritize on what to buy and what to wait on buying.

Dan stares at Phil, hope swimming in his brown irises. "Are you gonna go? Your mom's pretty strict and I wasn't sure if she'd let you go to the concert."

"No, I'm going. I'm not passing up a chance to see my favorite band in the world." Susan will let him go. She likes Dan. She's happy whenever he comes over to his house. If she doesn't, he'll beg her to go. _I'll donate a kidney if I have to. This is a one-in-a-lifetime opportunity to see Muse in person._

"Great. The concert starts at seven. Do you want to meet at my house?"

"Sure." _Still too risky for him to come later in the day when both mom and dad are home._

Giddy, Phil leans forward and give Dan a brief hug. Dan has no idea how much this gift means to him. He can't wait to see the others' faces when he shows them the ticket. If this is what Dan got Phil for Christmas, who knows what he'll get the others? Phil bets that their gifts will be just as extravagant.

He feels like a hyperactive girl meeting her idol. Fiona reacted the same way when she went to a Justin Bieber concert last year. Muse is his biggest idol, and he's getting to see his favorite band in the world with a special person who's just as big a fan as he is.

* * *

~:~

* * *

At nighttime on a Sunday night, Tabitha lies awake on her bed, Simon asleep next to her. Her chest is filled with guilt. One hour ago, she made one of the biggest mistakes in her life. However, it's a mistake that she doesn't regret doing. The moment didn't occur merely out of passion; they were completely sober and weren't out of their wits. When Johnathan stopped her on the sidewalk, he spoke the words that drastically changed the relationship between them.

 _"I've fallen for you."_

 _"You can't. I… I… this is wrong."_

 _"I know it is. But I never had a chance to feel this way. I was never given a chance to fall in love. Now I have. With you."_

 _"You've fallen in love with the wrong person."_

 _"At the wrong time."_

 _"But…"_

 _"It's right?"_

 _"As much as it pains me to say it, yes."_

 _"What about Simon?"_

 _"It's strange. When we were first dating, I thought he was the man of my dreams. He still is. He gives me everything and he's a wonderful father of my children. Between us… I don't know. The love isn't there anymore."_

 _"Have you fallen out of love with him?"_

 _"I think so."_

Before Johnathan, Tabitha gradually lost the love that she had for Simon when they first met. Somewhere in their marriage, she perceived him less as her one and only love. When they kiss, the kisses lack the delight that she felt when they were younger. They lost the fire. The fire is a dimming candlelight. She doesn't see him as a husband – she sees him as a friend.

It's not Simon's lips that she wants to feel. It's not Simon's hands that she wants to hold. It's not Simon's eyes that she wants to look at. It's not Simon's heart that she wants to cherish.

The one that she truly wants is Johnathan: the one man that she can't have.

* * *

~:~

* * *

On the night of the Muse concert, Susan, fresh out of work, is walking home. Phil is going out with his new friend to the Muse concert, and as much as she declined her son to go to the concert so he could study for his final exams next week, he relentlessly begged her to let him go. Against her better judgement, she allowed him to go, but only if he comes home by midnight and study all day tomorrow. If Dan wasn't the person that would accompany him, she wouldn't let him go at all.

When Susan arrives home, the first thing she notices are the absence of Johnathan and Phil's shoes. _John must still be at work and Phil must have already left for the concert._ She takes off her heels first, then strolls into the kitchen. Saran wrap cover bowls of rice, beef stew, and asparagus. There are only two plates on the table. _Fiona and Martyn ate without me… it will be another dinner by myself._ Half the days of the week has incomplete family dinners, though Martyn is usually the one absent from the dinner table.

She climbs up the stairs and heads into her bedroom to change out of her work clothes. She opts for one of her nightgowns and a matching set of white underwear and bra. As she changes into her night attire, something catches her eye from underneath the bed. She kneels down, finding lacy red panties.

 _This isn't mine._ She looks under the bed, wondering if there's a red bra there too. Nothing. Just the underwear.

She sits down at the foot of the bed, holding the underwear under the ceiling light. She sniffs the garment; it smells unused. _Whose underwear is it?_ There's no price tag on it. _Did John buy it?_ _Did he go shopping for clothes without me?_ She glances at the size: medium. Her size is small. _Is it for Fiona? Fiona's underwear size is medium. Or did he already do his Christmas shopping? I thought we were going together to buy the kids' presents once Phil and Fiona's finals are over._ Maybe he doesn't trust her. That isn't a surprise. Perhaps he finished his Christmas shopping so she wouldn't have to nag him about it. _How many times do I have to remind him? I don't nag!_ She merely relies on reminders to get things done. She believes that reminding people helps them remember things easier.

Did Johnathan buy undergarments for Fiona for Christmas? She smiles. If he was going to Victoria's Secret, she should have came with him. _I could have fended off any woman that tried to get close to him._ But why only buy underwear? It's odd that he wouldn't buy bras to go along with underwear. When it comes to underwear, it's easier for women buy the garments in sets.

 _Unless… No. It's John._ He wouldn't have a mistress. Even though they argue often, he isn't a man that would be involved in affairs. _Affairs are for the weak. John isn't weak. He isn't that desperate… is he?_

She shakes her head. She shouldn't jump to conclusions. He wouldn't do that to her. He wouldn't do that to their children. Their family is too important for them. He won't resort to an affair to tear apart what they have.

She leaves the underwear back under the bed. She'll ask him about it later. She shouldn't assume the worst until she has a proper answer. _He knows better than to make a fool out of me._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Dan and Phil walk alongside each other as they head to their city's biggest stadium. The two best friends chatter excitedly, ecstatic that tonight is finally the night of Muse's concert. However, Dan is thinking of more than just the concert. He's questioning if this night out is an unofficial date with the raven-haired boy that he likes. _This isn't a date. It's not a date when you're the only one who wants it to be one._

"I can't wait to see what songs Muse is going to play," Phil says. "They better play songs out of Origin of Symmetry."

"They will. It's their best album ever." _The new album's not so bad too._

"God, I can't believe we're going to meet Muse."

Dan grins. "That's like the millionth time you said that since I gave you the tickets."

"I'm sorry! I'm really, really happy and we're not even at the concert yet."

"Don't sweat it. I'm just as happy as you are." _Keep being happy, Phil. I like seeing you happy._

Dan can't stop staring at Phil's smile. Phil's smile could light up the entire planet. His smiles are sincere and cheery. He radiates the gloomy caverns in his soul.

He internally shakes his head. _This is going to be a long night._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Meanwhile, in the home of the Howells, Johnathan and Tabitha are joined together in the most passionate physical bond in the human species. He's holding her tightly in his arms, looking down at the beautiful female whispering his name over and over in his ear. _Happiness. It was outside my window all this time._

Its getting late. He has to head home soon. Simon will be home at any minute and Susan will wonder where he is. He wishes that they were younger and met under the right circumstances for him to fall in love with her. She's a breath of fresh air. She's the one woman that he can run to when his home isn't home.

As she comes down from her wave of intense lust, he lovingly drapes the sheets over her body. As he gathers his clothes and gets dressed, she looks at him with the same love reflected in his eyes. There's no need for words. The comfortable silence is enough to describe their sexual bliss.

"I'll see you later," he tells her when he's fully dressed.

She nods. "Don't let Susan sink her claws at you again."

He laughs. She makes him laugh more than Susan ever did. "Her claws won't ever come close."

He leans down to kiss her. Their lips are attached far longer than it should. His mouth lingers on hers before he groans and reluctantly pull away. He can't get enough off her. She's his personal drug, his own brand of heroine. _If I'll be drunk on something, I'll be drunk on love._

* * *

~:~

* * *

The stadium is packed with hundreds of the city's biggest Muse fans. Phil sings along to the band as they perform New Born. This is one of the best nights of his life. It doesn't matter if he doesn't have VIP tickets. It's enough to see them this close.

Dan bumps his hips against Phil. Phil chuckles, bumping his hips back at his brunette friend. Sweat drips down the side of Phil's face. With all the people gathered here tonight, the stadium's stuffy atmosphere makes him feel hot. But he doesn't care. He's having the time of his life.

Even if he's not here with a crush, nothing will change his skyrocketing positive emotions.

* * *

~:~

* * *

At a law firm somewhere in the city, a lawyer has just finished work, leaving the building and heading to his car. Simon's latest case is killing him – if only his stubborn client didn't complicate things. As much as he loves his job, he has to endure the occasional days when the hectic work hours makes him want to lash out at someone. Had one of his co-workers not ordered Chinese takeout for the entire office for dinner, he would have been more grumpy than he already is.

Driving home, Simon turns on the radio and tunes it to a radio station that plays throwback music. He doesn't have to return to the office until Monday. _Maybe I'll barbecue something for Tabitha, Dan, and Adrian. It's been a while since I last touched the grill._

When he turns on the street where his house is, he notices a man walk out from one of the houses. It takes him a few seconds to realize that the man had walked out of his house. _Do I know him?_ Simon doesn't know if he has ever seen the man before. Is he one of Tabitha's friends? All of Simon's time at the law firm doesn't give him enough time to meet everyone in town. He barely knows everyone in the neighborhood.

The man seems familiar. He can't quite put his finger on it. In the darkness, he gets a vague look at the man: tall, black hair, and recently shaved. In the darkness, he's unable to see the man's eye color.

 _Wait. I do know him._ It's Johnathan Lester, the father to one of his oldest son's friends. He had a chance to see what Johnathan looked like when Dan showed him one of Phil's family photos saved on his phone. They must have met because of their sons. It's fine. _He's perfectly harmless. There's nothing to worry about._

After all, his wife deserves to have some male friends.

* * *

~:~

* * *

The concert draws to a close. Matt Belamy closes off the concert with Starlight. To Dan, it's a bit odd that Muse's lead singer chose to end the show with one of the band's more romantic songs. But he doesn't mind. Every Muse song is a good song.

 _ **Far away, this ship is taking me far away**_

 _ **Far away from my memories**_

 _ **Of the people who I care if I live or die**_

 _ **Starlight, I will be tasting your starlight**_

 _ **Until the end of my life**_

 _ **I don't know if it's worth it anymore**_

 _ **Hold you in my arms**_

 _ **I just wanted to hold you in my arms**_

Phil focuses on watching the band. Dan makes sidelong glances at him. Phil is on Dan's mind whenever he listens to rock songs about love. Starlight is no exception.

 _ **My life, you electrify my life**_

 _ **Let's conspire to ignite**_

 _ **All the souls that will die just to feel alive**_

Phil's lips move, mouthing the lyrics. Dan mouths the lyrics with him. He too knows the song by heart. He wants to reach out and hold Phil's hand. He wants to hold Phil in his arms, just like the line of the song. He settles for standing next to the object of his objection as close as possible.

 ** _I will never let you go_**

 _ **If you promise not to fade away, never fade away**_

 _I never want you to not be a part of my life, Phil._

When the song ends, the stadium bursts in cheers. Matt waves at the entire audience, shouts good night, thanks everyone for coming to the show, and leaves the stage. The two friends file out the exit along with everyone else. They can't wipe the grins off their faces.

"That was amazing!" Phil shouts when they are outside. "That was the best concert ever!"

"Have you even went to a concert?"

"Once. Alfs, Peej, Joe, and I went to see Jason Derulo a couple years ago."

"I can't picture you at a hip-hop concert." The thought of Phil listening to genres of music aside from rock is mind-boggling to Dan.

"So did I. But Jason Derulo's not so bad." _At least Jason Derulo has cool dance moves._

They don't stop talking for the rest of the way to Phil's house. They take their time walking, not in a rush to go home. Dan isn't ready for the night to end. He loves spending time with Phil, especially when it's just the two of them. Tonight, they were in a personal bubble. They won't have this bubble tomorrow. Tomorrow, they'll be back to their normal lives.

Dan wants to kiss Phil and tell the raven-haired boy that he likes him. He wants Phil to know that his Christmas gift was the one that he wanted to make the most special. At this point, he doesn't care about Fiona. He'll deal with the consequences later. This is about them. This is about taking a leap to see if they could be something more.

There is something more between them, and he wishes to find out if "something more" is capable of turning into love.

* * *

~:~

* * *

The two boys are walking toward an intersection, closer to where the Lester residence is. Phil is close to doing something that he'll regret. There's a voice in his head that's encouraging him to make a move. _It's just you and Dan. Take the chance._ He wants to throw a rock at the voice so it would shut up. He doesn't know how much longer he can take having these insane thoughts. _He's right here. Go on. Do it._

"Phil." They stop at the intersection. Phil turns to face Dan. He's gazing at Phil with a soft expression. _Maybe the voice is in Dan's head too._

"Why did you buy me the concert tickets?" Phil asks. "I wouldn't have minded skipping the concert. You could've bought me something less expensive for Christmas and I would've been okay with it."

Dan shakes his head. "I can't settle for mediocre. Phil, I didn't want your gift to be average. We haven't known each other too long, but I know you don't deserve anything less."

"But why? Why does it matter that I deserve the best?"

"Because-" Dan steps closer. "You've become one of the best things in my life."

Phil's breath hitches. Dan clasps both of Phil's hands in his. A blush rises on Phil's cheeks, his stomach fluttering with butterflies. _Think about Fiona. Your promise. You swore you'd help her. This isn't helping her._

"You mean so much to me," Dan murmurs. _Chocolate… his eyes look like melted chocolate._

"Me too," Phil whispers. _He likes you. You like him. Stop overthinking and kiss him!_

Dan holds their hands up, pressing them against his chest. "Stop me, Phil. If you don't want this, just say the word."

 _Don't stop._ This isn't a force that can't be fought. Phil is a magnet. So is Dan. The magnets have a powerful attraction toward one another. He's attracted to Dan. No wonder Summer thought that they looked like a couple. In a single stranger's eyes, their closeness was perceived as a relationship beyond friendship. Someone saw the bond of the two magnets before they did.

Dan feels it. He knew before Phil did. From the moment they met, their destinies were meant to tangle up with each other. Maybe Dan was meant to move to his hometown, because it meant that he'd meet the one that he's meant to be with.

"Are we friends?" Phil questions.

"Do you want us to be?"

"No." _I want to be more than your friend._

Dan smiles. "Then this won't be wrong."

Dan lets go of Phil's hands and places them on either side of Phil's face. Phil's hands fall to his side. Their lips meet in the middle. He closes his eyes. Dan's lips are soft. Somehow, the fact that he's kissing a boy doesn't bother him. Whether he's kissing a boy or a girl, it doesn't matter. He's feeling the sparks. Something that's so wrong is right. His mind momentarily shuts down doubts. He's centered on the sensation of being here with Dan, sharing a moment that he didn't expect would happen tonight. It would have happened eventually. Fate must have decided that the concert is the setting that will bring them together.

When they pull apart, Dan is looking at Phil with the most vulnerability that Phil has ever seen him in. "I like you, Phil."

The words come out of Phil's mouth naturally. _I'm so sorry, Fi._ "I like you too."

* * *

 **Ah Phan fluff. Angst is usually my area of expertise, but I can write the fluff too. Out of all the chapters I wrote for IPY, this is one that I really enjoyed writing.**

 **I made a lyric reference to Happiness by The Fray, if you managed to catch it. The Fray is one of my favorite bands in the world, and Happiness is one of my favorite songs from said band. As you can see, this is the affair part of the story that I posted in the summary. I tried my best to make it one of those mini plot twists, because that's what teleseryes are so good at doing. When those happen, you should see my reactions of yelling at the TV screen, saying things like "How the fuck did I not see this coming!"**

 **Btw can you let me know how I'm doing with this? I'll take any critique I can get. SO HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT.**

 **~ AA**


	9. Confirmations and an Affair

Chapter 9: Confirmations and an Affair

Haiku

 _The longer you hide_

 _The more anger there is when_

 _The truth will come out_

* * *

It's 6 PM on Christmas Eve. The eight teens are in the living room of the Suggs residence, having their annual gift exchange. The difference about this year is the addition of a new friend.

"Did you buy condoms again?" Fiona asks as Louise and Alfie carry their wrapped presents over to the coffee table. Last year, the group did their gift exchange at school since PJ would be out of town to spend the holidays with his grandparents. As a joke, Alfie attached a single condom to every gift that he gave to the friends. If it wasn't for an outraged Zoe chasing Alfie around, Fiona would have whacked Alfie with the lightsaber that she ordered from EBay for Alfie's Christmas present.

Alfie puts his gift on the table. "I wouldn't mind a repeat of last year, though Zoe might have not used her gift yet."

Zoe glares at him. "We may not be at school, but I can chase you out that door and let the whole neighborhood see you this time."

"Ooh. I'm so scared."

She picks up an empty carton of eggnog and throws it at him. It lands squarely on his head.

"Damn, lady love. Maybe I should have bought another box of condoms."

"No!" Louise and Fiona say in unison. Fiona used hers for the condom challenge that she did with the girls and posted on her Facebook. It was the best way she could get rid of the condom without opening it for its practical use.

Louise picks up the carton and places it back on the table. "No more condoms. Let's all agree to buy them when we actually need them."

Alfie smirks. "Are you saying you need 'em?"

Louise matches Zoe's glare. "Do you want another carton thrown at you?"

Dan leans closer to Fiona. "Do I want to know what's up with the whole condom thing?"

She shakes her head. "It's best if you don't know."

With the gifts spread out on the table, they start the gift exchange. They read out to's and from's. They eye the size of every gift and speculate what each of them contain. Dan's gift to Fiona is slightly larger compared to everyone else's. Phil is the only one sans gift from Dan since the brunette boy had given him the Muse concert ticket. She thought that it was incredibly sweet for Dan to do that for her brother. Since the concert, Phil seemed more upbeat.

Louise grins. "Fi, looks like Dan went all out on your gift."

The gift exchange is over. Joe booted up his x-box and everyone is watching Alfie and Zoe play Assassins Creed. "I dunno. Dan buying Phil concert tickets is hard to top."

"What do you think he got you?"

Fiona shrugs. _Could be a boxed perfume set from Macy's._

"Imagine if he left a love note in there."

Fiona's plastic cup of eggnog pauses midway from her mouth. "Lou, you're being ridiculous."

"Well, yes. But it's possible."

"Let's be real. I don't think Dan would resort to a love note to tell me if he likes me." If he even does.

"Then how would you think he'd confess his feelings?"

Dan is still a bit of a mystery. They know so much about him, but not enough when it comes to love. He doesn't talk about his love life, if he even had one. Everyone in the room knows that she like him, except Dan himself. She's praying that none of the boys will slip up and he'll find out before she get the chance to tell him. She wants him to hear it from her own mouth and not because of an accidental slip-up.

"I don't know," she admits. "We've known him for five months. He doesn't talk about his love life. But… I think Dan is the kind of guy that'll tell you if he likes you. He isn't the most outgoing guy in our group, but he is the most down-to-earth."

Louise nods. "And if he's the most down-to-earth, then whatever he gave you should be proof that he's boyfriend material."

"He was boyfriend material when Zoe introduced him to us," she agrees.

"Better than Jack?"

"Way better." _I was over Jack the moment that I laid eyes on Dan._

And he is. Because on Christmas day, when the twins are opening their Christmas presents in Fiona's room, she unwraps Dan's present to find that he bought her a Bath and Body Works gift set that she was eying during their last group trip to the mall.

She has been looking for signs of whether or not Dan might like her. The gift is a sign. It makes her hope that Louise's love note assumption could happen after all.

* * *

~:~

* * *

He goes on a morning jog around the city on the day after Christmas. It has been two weeks since the Muse concert. If Phil's 7-year-old self witnessed the kiss that occurred between him and Dan, he would bash his head for bring an idiot. But, he's an idiotic, lovesick fool who has no regrets over the kiss.

 _"What happens to us now, Phil?"_

 _"I don't know."_

 _"I'm probably breaking the moment if I say I know Fiona likes me."_

 _"Wait, you know? Who told you?"_

 _"No one told me. I had my suspicions."_

 _"Damn it… I thought you couldn't tell. Fi's gonna hate my guts."_

 _"No she won't."_

 _"Yes she will! I swore to myself I'd help her. All this time, I've been trying to set you two up together."_

 _"Are you serious? I thought you were just trying to be nice!"_

 _"Dan, this is so messed up. I'll be a prisoner in hell if she sees us together. She's my sister. I can't hurt her like that. She was the one that liked you first. It isn't fair to her or to me."_

 _"I don't like her, Phil! I like you! This was the exact reason why I didn't want to pursue you."_

 _"Fuck my life."_

 _"Hearing you swear, which you barely do, is the least of our problems."_

Dan and Phil decided to discuss more about their relationship after New Years. They didn't want to end the year on a bad note for Fiona. They could wait a few weeks.

Phil promised her. He gave her his word that he would never let love come between them. If he and Dan become a couple, he'll break their promise. He'll break her trust. The promise brought them closer. When their pinkies hooked, he swore to her that he wouldn't betray her. She held on to him in the darkest moments at home when their rooms couldn't protect them from the tension that was happening close by. It's because of their parents that she has a hard time believing in true love.

Her crush on Dan isn't something to take lightly. This crush isn't one that she'll give up easily. He sees her look at Dan in a way that gives her hope that love can end in happily-ever-after. Dan gives her a reason to believe reality can be a fairy tale.

 _What am I gonna do?_ It's not about questioning if the feelings exist. The feelings are there. The problem is the consequences that will come because of their feelings.

What price would they have to pay for their chance to be together?

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's New Years Eve and a few hours away from midnight. Festivities have begun around the city for the entire day. The Howell family's youngest son was persistent about playing with sparklers, so Simon gave in and agreed to start preparing the firecrackers.

 _ **"Adrian! Be careful with that!"**_

 _ **"Dan! I'm twelve. I think I know how to carry explosives in my hands."**_

 _ **"Calling them explosives makes me more scared."**_

 _ **"Firecrackers make explosions… sort of."**_

Tabitha opens the front door. "Go help the boys, Simon. I don't want Dan to almost burn off his leg again." _I think I almost had a heart attack when that happened._

Simon chuckles. "It was a close call, but he does have fast reflexes."

"I'm a mother. It's natural to worry over my boys." Motherly instincts was how she was able to prevent Dan from being injured during New Years when he was 11.

"And you are a lovely mother at that." He motions to the open door. "Are you coming too?"

"In a bit." There's something important that she has to do first, and she has to be alone for it.

He kisses her cheek. "Don't be long."

"I won't." _If I do, he'll ask questions._

He follows the boys outside. The familiar twinge of guilt coils in her stomach. They are a family. Holidays are when she can believe that they are a normal family, even when it isn't normal. Beyond closed doors, she tucks away the real feelings that are stored in her heart.

She heads upstairs and enters her bedroom. She changes out of her floral-print dress and into a t-shirt and sweatpants. The temperatures are low outside, but not too low that she requires a jacket. She opens one of the drawers and takes out an unwrapped Christmas present.

It's Johnathan's late Christmas gift for her. He gave it to her yesterday when they met up at a small café somewhere in the outskirts of town. Because it's their children's winter break from school, they've been spending more time with their family than each other. Yesterday was the only time since Dan's finals week when the secret couple were able to meet up and exchange Christmas gifts.

She's itching to see Johnathan again. Until their children head back to school, they can't risk something like a simple phone call.

Now is a safe time to find out what Johnathan gave her. She glances out the window. Simon is helping Adrian and Dan with the sparklers. Carefully, she removes the wrapping. As she tears away the wrapping, she finds a rectangular-shaped box that resembles boxes bought from jewelry stores.

She opens the box. She gasps, staring at the necklace with a dangled 'T' charm, as well as a red bra-and-underwear set rolled to the left of the necklace. There's a pink post-it taped to the right inside cover of the box. **_For the woman that tantalizes me 24 hours a day. – J.L._**

Her eyes water. The necklace looks expensive. _Johnathan didn't have to do this._ He could have given her a gift card and still be happy. _I'm this special to him. He has a monster wife, and he'd use his money on me._ Her gift to him wasn't too expensive. She kept it simple, deciding on a pair of shoes he could use for work.

Her mind is locked on the necklace as she throws away the wrapping and buries the box under her clothes in the drawer. She's trapped in a never-ending secret with this man. They consented to the start of the affair, not knowing how long it will last. How long will it last? Will they simply break it off when they both realize that their families are more important than each other?

 _Will you be his mistress forever?_ That's what she is: Johnathan's mistress. It doesn't matter if he loves her.

As long as he's a married man with his own children, it won't change the fact that she's nothing more than his hidden lover.

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's January 2nd of the new year. Susan leaves her house, absolutely sure that she'll return home before her children will notice that she left. The holidays are over. Johnathan didn't give their only daughter a red underwear, and yet the underwear in question is gone. Until that point, she assumed that the bold-colored garment was for Fiona. The underwear could have been for Johnathan's mother. She could be jumping into conclusions without concrete evidence.

 _No more keeping my suspicions to myself._ Susan can't turn a blind eye. If she chose to ignore her suspicions, she could be letting the truth slip out of her grasp. When she asked Johnathan about the underwear, he told her that it was none of her business.

 _It is my business._ His words could be hinting that he has a mistress.

 _If he does, that gold-digging whore better kiss my John goodbye._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Tabitha waits at her usual meeting spot for her hidden lover. Winter break is over, and she and Johnathan resumed their secret meetings. Tonight is a night for them to go to where it all started: the bar where they first met. When he arrives at 9 PM sharp, they briefly embrace before sharing a kiss.

"Another night, my lady." he brings one of his hands up and kisses her knuckles. "Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?"

She laughs. _Johnathan and his cheesy quotes._ "Is Shakespeare your way of throwing a pick-up line on me?"

"Is it working?"

 _All the time._ "If you can recite the whole poem, sure."

"Never mind then." He pulls back, keeping one hand holding one of hers. "I don't need pick-up lines to woo you."

 _Seriously, how stupid is Susan to not appreciate what she has?_ "You can woo me by buying me a drink."

He grins. "Deal."

They continue their conversation on the way to the bar. Lover or not, she enjoys talking to him. When she's with him, she feels younger. She feels like they are teenagers sneaking out in the middle of the night to cause ruckus somewhere in town.

Her usual concern about their relationship is diminished by the time the two of them reach the bar. Being closer to their prime years, the bar is their closest way to feel 20 instead of 50. Upon walking toward the front entrance, Tabitha notices a single woman waiting outside. She doesn't recognize the bobbed blonde hair, blue-eyed stranger.

There's something about the way that the woman is glaring at them and wearing the harshest expression that Tabitha has ever seen that sends a burst of familiarity to her stomach. Johnathan's pale face makes her blood run cold. He knows her.

"You," the woman growls, pointing her finger at Tabitha. "What are you doing here with my husband?"

Tabitha's lips trembles. _It's her. It's Susan. It's the monster wife._

* * *

~:~

* * *

In the parking lot of one of the city's numerous bars, Susan stares at Johnathan and the unknown woman in front of her. She doesn't want it to be true. She could have ignored her doubts and remained oblivious. But she knows. She knows that this is the woman than her husband gave the underwear to. This is Johnathan's mistress.

"Susan." Johnathan copies Susan's glare. "What are you doing here? I told you that I was going out."

She laughs bitterly. _Did you think that I'd take your word without knowing why you were going out?_ "Yes. You were going out with this hag."

"Who are you calling a hag?" the woman speaks up. "The only hag I see is you."

She growls. _How dare she talk to me like that!_ "Why you little-"

"Stop." He moves to stand in front of the woman. "I don't have time to deal with you."

"Why not? We have all the time in the world right now. Isn't that what you do on your spare time? Go out to see another woman behind my back? Do you think I'm stupid?" _I'd be the stupid one if I didn't know John was cheating on me!_

"Susan, you're going to cause a scene."

"So? I don't care!" Her voice rises. "You have the nerve to settle for a tramp just because you don't love me. Is that what it is? Am I not enough for you? Do you not care about me? About our kids?"

"Do you not care about your husband?" the woman steps in front of him so they are a few inches apart. "You dare talk like you're the damsel in distress. The only one that's suffering here is Johnathan! Do you have any idea what he has to put up with every single day? You may as well have cotton balls in your ears! Not only do you not listen to Johnathan, but you don't listen to your own kids! They don't talk back to you because you scare them. Your oldest… what was his name… Martyn? Martyn. Martyn did what your other kids couldn't do. And you punish him for it? Stop having your head in the clouds. You're lucky Johnathan hasn't left you."

She doesn't hold back from the slap that her left hand makes to the woman's face. "Look who's talking. You're nothing but a second rate gold digger trying hard to be a copycat. You're just a mistress. I'm his wife. Who here does John belong to?"

Her next words stuns Susan. "I may be a mistress, but I am the woman he loves." A hint of a smile appears on her face. "You may legally be his, but I'm the one that owns his heart."

* * *

~:~

* * *

In his bedroom in the Lester residence, Martyn is lying on his bed, on the verge of falling asleep when he hears yelling coming from downstairs. _Ugh. Looks like mom and dad are at it again._ He opens his eyes and sits up. Grabbing his phone, he check the time. 12:02 AM. _Way to be a buzzkill, mom. I try to go to sleep early, and this happens?_ With a sigh, he grabs his headphones and plugs it in to his phone. He picks a random playlist and hits "shuffle." He doesn't want to hear this, but he'll be fine as long as he listens to a different sound that can overpower what's happening outside his room.

He hopes Fiona that won't have another breakdown. She doesn't fare well with the fighting. _Phil, you better still be awake._ Martyn is not the comforter in the family – that's Phil. It's Phil's job to deal with Fiona when fights go down in the house. The most that he can do is tell Fiona to get used to it. Adapting is the only solution to this ongoing mess.

 _I may be a disappointment, but I still have a heart._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Phil watches as his Fiona rushes into his room. She locks the door behind her and tumbles onto his bed. She isn't crying, but her body is shaking. _Not again._

"Phil, I think something's wrong." She looks up at him with a worried expression. "You saw mom go out earlier. She would never do that, even when dad goes out after they fight."

"You're right…" He glances toward the closed door. "Do you wanna see what's going on?"

The screaming continues. He can sense the tremors radiating from her body. _Don't be scared, sis. I'm here. It'll be okay._

"You can go," she says in a hushed voice. "I'll be fine up here."

"Okay. Stay put." He gives her a brief one-armed hug. He jumps off the bed, opens the door, and head downstairs. When he reaches the top of the stairs, he makes out fragments of Susan and Johnathan's conversation.

 ** _"Tabitha is no good for you!"_**

 _ **"I've had enough! Susan, will you please quiet down? The kids will hear us."**_

 _ **"So let them hear! Let them know that their father is cheating on me!"**_

 _ **"You know, I have no regrets in cheating on you. I did it for the right reason."**_

 _ **"So you're telling me having your filthy hands touching another woman is a good thing? Huh? HUH?"**_

 _ **"You're judging Tabitha based on the reason why I'm seeing her. Maybe if you weren't so rude to me all the time, I wouldn't have been interested in her if we met under different circumstances!"**_

 ** _"So this is my fault? It's my fault I want the best for us?"_**

 _ **"No. It's your fault that what you think is the best isn't the best at all!"**_

Panic emerges in his chest. His ears are ringing. Everything he's hearing isn't a lie. Susan wouldn't be this mad if there wasn't something that was bothering her.

They were lied to.

 _It can't be._ _Is dad cheating on mom with Mrs. Howell?_

* * *

~:~

* * *

As Fiona remains occupying Phil's bedroom, she uses a pillow to put over her in order to try to block out the noise. The tension is thick all over the house. _Why isn't he back yet? What's going on downstairs? The neighbors will call the cops soon if mom and dad don't stop._

She breathes in slowly. _Inhale… exhale. Inhale… exhale. Calm down. Breathe._ She needs to find out what's going on. She can't stay in Phil's bedroom and not be there for Phil if something happens to him.

When her heartbeat slow down, she throws her pillow to the side. _Be strong, Fi._ Be brave. She leaps off the bed and heads to the door.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Composing himself, Phil leaves his spot from upstairs and goes to join his parents. He can see the fire raging in his mom's eyes, a stare that could kill the most ferocious lions. _Please oh please don't let it be true._

"Phil." Johnathan shifts his gaze from Susan to Phil. "Go back upstairs. Your mother and I need to settle this on our own."

"There's no point in hiding," Susan snaps. "I would have told them myself."

He glares at her. "I don't care if you'll tell them to spite me. But have you even thought about what would happen if you told the kids? To Fiona? You know how sensitive Fiona can be! Do you want to give her another panic attack?"

"I don't care about a panic attack!" she shouts. "The kids have to know the truth."

 _I was right._ "So it's true," Phil whispers. He looks up at his dad. "Are you…?" He trails off, unable to finish the sentence. A part of him hopes that if he doesn't say the words, the truth isn't the truth. The truth could have been misheard and the real truth is yet to be heard. There are two sides to every story. If he hasn't heard the whole story yet, there might be a detail that he hasn't heard that may mean the difference between what's right and what's wrong.

Susan crosses her arms. "Tell him, John. Tell Phil how you've been seeing his best friend's mother for the last several weeks." _Best friend's mother? Oh no…_

Johnathan's shoulders slump. "I'm so sorry, Phil." _So he is seeing another woman._

The who is Phil's bigger concern. He has met all of his friends' parents. Dad dating any of them will be the biggest dishonor ever.

Susan moves to stand next to him. There's pity in her eyes. "Are you familiar with a Tabitha?"

* * *

~:~

* * *

Fiona watches the entire conversation from where Phil earlier stood. She has forgotten how to breathe. She feels lightheaded. Her arms on the railing is going slack and her knees could buckle at any second.

There's only one Tabitha that she knows, and that's Dan's mother. This is a mother that invited her and Phil for several dinners, a mother than she looks up to, a mother that she wished Susan would be like.

Blood rushes out of Phil's face. She thinks that her blood has gone blue too. A reality of her dad being in an affair wouldn't be a surprise. At the consistency of her mom and dad's fights, it would have been a matter of time before her dad had enough. There would have come a time and place where he'd get fed up and find someone else. But why did it have to be her crush's guardian? Out of all the women he could be in an affair with, it has to be a woman that's linked to a boy that she like.

 _Maybe it's a different Tabitha._ The population of the city is large. _There are hundreds of females named Tabitha in the world. Maybe the Tabitha they're talking about isn't Tabitha Howell._

"You're joking." _Even Phil's in denial._

Johnathan shakes his head. "I'm not, son."

"But… how can it be?" Phil's lower lip quivers. "I've never properly introduced Dan's mom to you. How did you meet? How long has this been going on? How-"

"I'll explain tomorrow," Johnathan cuts him off. "For now, you should get some sleep."

Johnathan turns his head, locking his eyes lock on Fiona. "You too Fiona." His tone is soft, pleading. No menace whatsoever. "I promise I'll tell you everything you want to know. Martyn too."

She can't feel her legs. Her mind goes blank and her hands let go of the railing.

In seconds, her vision goes black.

* * *

 **Dun. Dun. DUUUUUN. I promised you the drama and I gave you the drama.**

 **So that hand slap that Susan made to Tabitha is a classic move for any teleserye. No teleserye is complete without a giant slap. Even the funniest, heartwarming, or even kid-friendly teleseryes will have at least one giant hand slap somewhere in the series. IT'S ONE OF THE BEST PARTS OF ANY FILIPINO TV SHOW.**

 **I also hinted to a classic line of a Filipino movie (or teleserye… idk what it's called, but it's a popular line), and my friends used to reenact that scene all the time when we were in middle school. The line was "You're nothing but a second rate trying hard not to copycat." It's one of my favorite cinema dramatic lines I heard growing up and I wanted to incorporate it in IPY somehow.**

 **~ AA**


	10. Downhill Spirals and a Notebook

Chapter 10: Downhill Spirals and a Notebook

Haiku

 _In the aftermath_

 _Of a concealed betrayal_

 _You are in ruins_

* * *

Two days have passed since the revelation of an affair. Yesterday, Adrian and Dan were informed about the secret. Dan is in his bedroom, questioning the universe and why he's facing the aftermath of a giant lie. _How could mom do this to me? How could she cheat on dad with the father of who I like?_ The truth is a nightmare that he can't escape from; there's a relationship that's highly impacting the lives of two families.

 _How are the twins doing?_ He believes that Phil and Fiona are feeling as if the world hates them too. Simon is withdrawn, barely able to leave his room except to eat, drink, take care of personal hygiene, and go to work. _I don't think I've ever seen dad cry that much and beg mom not to leave him._ He wants to be angry at his mother. He should want karma to hit his mother for devastating their family like this, but he can't. _You can't force yourself not to love someone. Doesn't every protagonist in love stories say that they won't fall in love, but they fall in love anyway._ It's harder to resist falling in love than to admit you are in love.

 _"Loving Johnathan was easy. Like your father, I fell in love with him because I found something in him that I could never find in another man."_ The explanation clarified a speck of doubt of whether or not Tabitha has true feelings for Mr. Lester. At least she isn't using him for money, like some mistresses are typically after (Louise has a thing for foreign soap operas, and it seems like every soap opera involving affairs of antagonistic women have intentions to be with the man for their money).

He thinks about Phil. His feelings for Phil are growing stronger every minute that he's with the raven-haired boy.

Tabitha is fighting for her love.

Maybe he should be doing the same.

* * *

~:~

* * *

On the lunch period of the first day of the school year's second semester, the eight friends sit around their lunch table. Five of the teens stare at Dan, Phil, and Fiona in complete shock. They can't believe what they are hearing. The trio had told them that they had something to tell them when school was back in session. For Louise, she didn't believe that what her friends was going to reveal would be this unexpected.

"Bu… Wh… HOW?" Joe sputters. "When the bloody hell did this happen?"

"Since last November," Fiona spats.

"Oh Fi…" Louise scoots closer to the female Lester twin and gives her a hug. _How did we not see this coming?_ "So what are your parents gonna do about it?"

"I don't know." Fiona looks at everyone sadly. "After we found out, mom and dad told Phil and I they're gonna wait for things to cool down first before they talk."

Phil gazes down at the surface of the table. "I don't think they're ever gonna cool down. You all know that our parents are not the type to 'cool down.'"

"They'll have to if they care about us," Dan mutters. "They can't expect us to forget about it and pretend everything's fine. That's utter bullshit." He lets out a frustrated sigh. "I'm tired of seeing my dad act like he had a death wish. No offense Fiona and Phil, but if it wasn't for your mother, we wouldn't be in this mess."

"None taken," Fiona assures him. "The worst part is that your mom and my dad are in love. If they give up on their relationship, they're gonna be down in the sacks."

"But if they stay together, that's not good either," PJ points out.

"This is Love the Way You Lie in real life," Alfie joins in.

Zoe rolls her eyes, but stares at the trio in sympathy. "Eminem and Rihanna has nothing on their situation."

"So what kind of options do they have?" Louise asks. With all of the foreign soap operas that she has watched, a small part of her is delighted to see that affairs can happen in real life. _Poor Mrs. Howell and Mr. Lester. I've seen what happens in those dramas._

Phil shrugs. "The best one I can think of is that my mom and dad get divorced. Fi and I prepared ourselves for that to happen for years. Even if there wasn't an affair, seeing my parents fight all the time can only mean that it's a matter of time until they decide they don't want to be married to each other anymore."

Dan stares at Phil. "And you'd be fine with that?"

Phil tilts his head up and looks at the entire group, then nods. "I want what's best for them, and what's best for them is to be away from each other for good."

* * *

~:~

* * *

During the last school period of the same day, Zoe sits in her chemistry class, listening to her teacher drone boringly about the class syllabus. While she and the rest of her friends are still coming down from their shock about three of her friends' dilemma, she's thinking that there's something else happening at the same time – something involving Dan and Phil.

 _I think Dan and Phil like each other._ She plans to tell Louise about her hunch soon, knowing that a bit of Pentland insight could help her sort out her Sugg analysis. Since the time that Fiona confided in her and Louise about her crush on Dan (the boys were able to figure it out on their own, so when Fiona told them not too long after she told the girls, they were all doing their own I-knew-it reactions), she thought that Dan and Fiona would make a cool couple. She saw their comradery as sweet and witty, unlike her constant sarcastic comradery with Alfie the lovesick puppy.

Her opinion changed during the Halloween dance. When she caught Dan staring at Fiona while she and Phil danced, she questioned if Dan could be harboring feelings for Phil. Phil had acted casual about her comment, but the smiles that they shared at each other afterward confirmed her hunch. Dan and Phil smiled at each other in the way that she sees Matt smile at Louise. By the next day, Phan became her OTP.

She could be overthinking another analysis. Dan and Phil are closer than most friends. However, it doesn't mean that they don't have the hots for each other. _I see the tension. I sense desire. I sense two people longing to be with each other._ And since the weekend that the two boys attended the Muse concert, she noticed the increase of sneaky glances happening between them. The way that they look at each other seems as if they too are secret lovers.

She wonders if something happened at the concert. Could it be possible that Dan and Phil are already together and dating behind their backs?

* * *

~:~

* * *

On a Friday during his first week of college's spring semester, Anthony sits in his calculus class, concealing his phone underneath the table. The text that Fiona sent him has him concerned. She never texts him while they are at school. They have respective weekday agendas. Nighttime is usually the only time when they have time to call and text each other.

 _ **Fiona Lester: Need 2 talk 2 u. How soon can we meet?**_

He enjoys having Fiona as a friend. Even though she's still a high school junior, she has a brain that's college-ready. She's a girl that has AP English and honors physics. The only AP class that he took was for chemistry in his senior year, which he scraped by with a B-. Her intelligence is one of the things that he admires about her. She's smarter than his last two girlfriends combined.

He quickly sends her a text back. **_Today if you want. My house at 4?_ **_I wonder what she wants to talk about. Maybe she needs my help for a project or something. No… she wants to see me ASAP. It's gotta be more than a project._

Lost in his thoughts, the vibration of his phone startles him. Glancing down, he sees that she texted back. _ **I'll be there**_

Fiona has been to Anthony and Ian's houses a few times. The two male friends want to go to her house too, but she insists that it's better if they hang elsewhere besides her home. _"It's too messy and loud. Maybe another time."_ He presumed that she isn't ready to let them see her house yet, and he understands her perspective. Girls have their insecurities, and her house must be one of hers. _She can be living in a beehive and I wouldn't care._

He hightails to his house as soon as he's done with classes for the day. Ian has a class that doesn't end until five PM. Unless his parents come home early from work (which is rarely), he'll be alone in the house. Whatever she has to tell him, at least they won't have to worry about anyone eavesdropping on him.

Fiona is sitting on the front porch when he parks his car in the garage. She has a somber expression on her face. When she sees him exit the car, the expression is quickly replaced by a smile. "Hi Anthony!"

"Hey." _There's certainly something wrong. She's never this cheery._ He unlocks the front door. She follows him inside, taking off her sandals and leaving her footwear next to the door. She gets settled on the couch as he goes to the kitchen and grabs two bottles of Sunny D from the fridge. He returns to the living room, sitting down next to her on the couch. He notices that she's still wearing her somber expression.

He cuts to the chase. "So what's going on? What do you want to tell me?"

She turns her head to look at him. "Wanna know the reason why I never let you and Ian come to my house?"

He nods. _She's gonna tell me why. I didn't even have to pressure her._

"It's a long story," she starts. "It's mostly due to family problems. My home environment isn't safe for you and Ian sometimes, so I keep you two away so you aren't involved."

"Involved with what?" _Please don't let it be drugs._

"With… fuck, this is hard."

"It's okay. Say it like you're ripping off a Band-Aid."

"You think you can take it?"

"How bad can it be?"

"Not bad. Scandalous." _Scandalous? What is this? A Lindsay Lohan case?_

She proceeds to tell me him her "scandalous" reason. During her explanation, he realizes why she calls it a scandal. She tells him about her less-than-perfect family life; her parents frequently fight with each other and she recently found out that her dad is cheating on her mom. What surprises him the most is how the woman that her dad is seeing is the mother of one of her friends.

"I've been feeling like shit for the past few days," she concludes. "I'm still a bit pissed, but I feel bad for my dad. I know how much he longs for love." A troubled expression crosses her face. "I don't get love. If people say it's the best emotion in the world, why does it bring nothing but terrible luck for me?"

He sits there like a fish flopping on sand. He doesn't know how to answer the question. This is a girl that grew up in a household that lacked love. All she has to lean on is her two siblings. He hasn't met them yet, but she has told him that she's very close with her twin brother than her older brother.

"Well… love isn't there for everyone" is his response. "Some people are happy without love. Your dad seems is the kind of person that needs love to be happy. I hope things will get better for you, because I don't like seeing you sad." He's choosing his words carefully. He doesn't want to say anything that'll diminish her perception of love down further.

"No one likes being sad," she agrees.

"Exactly."

She smiles. "Thanks, Anthony. Thanks for being a good friend. Ian too."

"You're welcome. Are you planning to tell Ian this story?"

She nods. "I'll call him and tell him about it."

"Sure thing. By the way, how did your friends react about your dad's affair?"

"They were very surprised," she replies. "Phil, Dan, and I weren't in a good mood that day, so I'm glad our friends took it well."

"Good." Friendship is important. It's why he and Ian have remained best friends since they first met when we were five. Family and friends are the golden people to be with when life gives you lemons. For her, friends are the only people she has with her situation.

She surprises him when she swings her arm around his neck, pulling him to a hug. Whoa. Hot girl hugging me.

"You're a good listener," she says. "I gotta introduce you to my friends. I bet you'll get along with them."

 _Of course I will. If I like Fiona, I'll like her friends too._ "I'll take that bet."

He loves having her as a part of his life. Her problems are his problems. _Meeting her at Best Buy is one of the best things that ever happened to me, and I promise to be there for her when she needs me._

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's lunchtime on the 30th of January, the 17th birthday of the twins. The group is sitting at their lunch table, giving their birthday presents to Phil and Fiona. The affair is still looming like a dark cloud between the Howells and Lesters, so the six teens are using the twins' birthday to provide a bit of happiness to the sibling pair.

Dan pushes two small wrapped boxes toward Phil and Fiona. "Here's mine."

Phil grabs the box with blue wrapping paper, while Fiona takes the box with red wrapping paper. They say a quick thanks to Dan, then rip open the wrapping paper.

"Oh my god!" Fiona squeals, holding up a key chain with a pale blue peace sign charm.

"Where'd you get this?" Phil asks in awe, marveling his own chain, but with a black music note charm.

"EBay," Dan replies. "I was searching for trinkets online and I found those I knew you two would love."

"I love it." Fiona leaps up from her seat and swings her arms around Dan's neck. "Thank you so much!"

Phil looks between the two of them, nodding his thanks. He buries his slight discomfort of watching his sister freely hugging the boy that he should be embracing.

Dan returns Fiona's hug, wishing that it was Phil that hugged him.

Their mutual longing is as big a secret as their parents' affair. Similar to the affair, exposure of Dan and Phil's feelings to each other can destroy their loved ones.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Martyn sits in a movie theater with three of his friends from college. While Phil and Fiona are trying their best to remain civil with their parents, he's trying to be away from his parents as much as possible. Whenever he's around them, he has to hold himself back from saying something that he'll regret. _I hate my life. Why the hell was I born in a fucked-up family?_ It's because of them that he doesn't know what will happen to them, and he's powerless to do anything about it.

 _I wonder what Mrs. Howell is like._ Before he found out about the affair (his dad told him the next day following the fighting that he heard from the previous night), he heard nothing but good things from the twins about their friend's mother. From what he gathered, Mrs. Howell is nothing like his own mother. _Maybe dad should stay with Mrs. Howell. Maybe then I could trade my mom for someone that'll treat me like a son._

He should take his dad's advice and move out. He's an adult. He's in college. He gets a paycheck every month (he works part-time at a McDonald's). If he can convince one of his friends to live with him, he can rent an apartment. He's aware of a two-bedroom apartment available a few blocks away from his college.

The twins are two years away from turning 18 and graduating. He'll wait until his siblings are of legal age so they can escape their personal prison. He'll take them away from here, away to a place where no one will punish him for being a delinquent.

The three of them don't deserve to stay in a broken home.

They shouldn't be around the people that holds them back from what they want to do with their lives.

* * *

~:~

* * *

On the first week of February, Alfie and Joe are roaming the aisles of their favorite stationary store. Valentine's Day is coming up, and Alfie decided to give Zoe something that doesn't involve a typical Valentine's Day gift. Instead of going for flowers or chocolate, he wanted to be a little daring and try to be a bad boy. Joe, on the other hand, believes that Alfie's plan is ludicrous and could get them arrested if they aren't careful.

"Found what you need yet?" Joe asks Alfie, who is perusing the shelves that contains various folders, notebooks, and drawing pads. He and Alfie could have waited for their paycheck at Lilly's to come in so Alfie could have purchased a notebook without involvement of security guards and a possible phone call to their parents.

"Don't rain on my parade," Alfie sulks when Joe tried to talk his best friend out of the plan. "If I'm gonna get Zoe to notice me, this is the way to do it." _Jail, here I come._

"Perfect." Alfie pulls out a hardcover spiraled notebook with a purple and sky blue checkered print. He opens the notebook to make sure there are no lines in it. "Zoe won't know what hit her."

Joe eyes the notebook. Zoe mentioned the other day that her personal drawing pad was a few more pages away of being completely filled. She was supposed to visit the stationary store to purchase a new one over the weekend. However, Alfie took the piece of information as his perfect Valentine's Day present for Zoe. _"I'll be doing her a favor, and as long as we're friends, she'll have to accept it."_

The pastel colors matches Zoe's artistic style. Joe grins. If only his sister's stubbornness can stop masking the portion of her heart that could be capable of loving his best friend back. "Cool." He lowers his voice. "Now can we go? I'm getting nervous, and I'm not the one that came up with the crazy plan."

"I know. Now be quiet." Alfie gets back up in a proper standing position. "Follow me."

The two boys leave the aisle. They stop at a corner of the store where there are no security cameras aimed in their direction. They've been to this store many times over the years for their school supply needs. They know the it's and out's of the small building. Plus, Louise's mother is the manager of the store and she has given the friends numerous discounts during back-to-school season. But it doesn't matter if the two boys are acquainted with the store's manager. If they steal anything, Mrs. Pentland won't cover for them.

"You're still an idiot," Joe mumbles. Alfie is behind him, indiscreetly taking off the price tag and scanning sticker on the notebook. The only way they can get away with looting from the store is to take necessary precautions. There are some items in the store that don't have scanning stickers on them, but a notebook isn't one of them. Fortunately, it's easy to get rid of the sticker and its adjoining price tag.

"Done." Alfie crumpled up the two flimsy items. "Is anyone looking?"

Joe glances at their surroundings. There are people milling at other aisles, though none of them are aware of the boys' criminal activity. _This is too easy. Too easy that I'm more scared that we will fuck up. I'm too young to be in prison!_

"We're in the clear," he whispers. "Put it in your bag and let's get out of here."

With a quick look around, Alfie nods, quietly opening the main pocket of his backpack and shoves the notebook inside. "Go, go, go. Wait, did you want anything else?"

"Yes." Joe walks away from the corner. "But I'll get my pens and 0.7 lead the old-fashioned way and buying them with my own hard earned cash."

"Cash you earned from your parents," Alfie points out. _He's not wrong. I'm getting my paycheck from bosses related to me by blood._

"Whatever." Joe picks up three black gel pens and a three-pack of 0.7 lead. It's too late to chicken out now. But he can't walk out the store without doing some sort of good deed to balance out their bad one. After all, if their plan succeeds, he's officially the apprentice of a teenage shoplifter.

At the checkout counter, Alfie motions to the door. "I'll wait for you outside."

"Okay," Joe says nonchalantly. The cameras can see them now. _You're a regular customer, so act like one._ As he stands in line, he watches Alfie anxiously. The plan will be foiled if the security alarms go off. He strives to maintain his cool composure once he's finally at the register. The checkout lady takes care of his purchases, and he takes one more look at Alfie. Alfie is safely outside, grinning at him.

"We did it," Alfie mouths. _You still could've done it without me._

"That'll be $9.32," the checkout lady tells Joe, and he gives her a 10 dollar bill. Two glorious minutes later, he releases a relieved breath when he strolls out the store with a paper bag of his pens and lead pack.

Alfie beams. "That wasn't so hard. I believe an apology is in order."

Joe flips him off. "I'll apologize when Zoe is all over you when you give her that on Valentine's Day." _Zoe better appreciate what we just did. I could've spent Valentine's Day in a cage if we failed._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Meanwhile, in a bedroom of the Lester residence, Martyn stares blankly at the ceiling, ignoring the itchiness of his throat and the growling of his stomach. For someone like him, he thinks that he doesn't need two out of three of the basic requirements of survival. _I want to die. I want to die. I want to die._

Nothing is changing. His grades are fluctuating between B's and C's. _Better than straight C's from high school._ His job still sucks. _When does working in fast food never suck?_ His ex-girlfriend is still screwing around with his ex-best friend. His parents aren't making up anytime soon. His sister is still crushing on a boy that doesn't have a remote interest in her. _She won't believe me if I tell her that._ His brother is still a scaredy cat that doesn't have the balls to get out there and go on a date with someone. _Not counting Siri._ He's keeping up his I-don't-give-a-fuck attitude around his family, even though he's secretly caring about the problems that everyone is going through.

His attitude is a ruse. It's his way of being true to himself without anyone influencing him that he should be a "good boy." _Good boys are complete pussies. No wonder girls fall for bad boys._ When he converted to his bad boy persona in high school, girls fawned over him. Once the awkward part of puberty was over, he made use of his new looks. He partied, slept with many girls, and was still able to scrape by high school with a 3.0. At 19, he made a fresh start in college so he could finally take his future seriously.

If only his own mother believed that his priorities changed. As long as he doesn't give up partying with his frat buddies and sleeping over at other friends' house, it doesn't matter if he's doing well in school. _"Maybe if you don't drink, you'll get A's like your brother and sister."_

It always comes down to his siblings. Despite his mother's constant comparison to the twins, he cares about the Phil and Fiona. He envies them. They have semi-popularity, great looks, and intelligence all rolled into one. When he was in high school, he depended on his looks and athleticism to stay in the popular crowd. There were perks to being a star basketball player. But acceptance amongst his peers doesn't match up to his yearning for his mom's love. He wants to be shown compassion, and the love by his mom is far from the compassion that he dreamed about. If he can feel it from his father, he deserves to feel it from his mother too.

There's only one way that he can get her attention. A mother's love intensifies beyond death. Once he's gone, he bets that his death will be the driving force that can draw out the compassion from his mom. _How should I die? A knife? A gun? Hanging myself? Drug overdose? Getting run over by a train?_ It doesn't matter how he would die. Once his heart stops beating, he's gone to the world.

He closes his eyes. _Who cares if I'm being irrational? No one cares about me anyway._

* * *

~:~

* * *

At 4:56 AM on a Wednesday morning, Simon's shoe-covered feet makes quiet steps across the living room of the Howell household. The luggage is in his car. His phone is in his slacks' back pocket. A note is taped on the refrigerator. His eyes sadly takes one last look around the house. If he leaves now, he can still have time to book a hotel room before heading to work. _I have to do this._

He doesn't want to stay in his home any longer. The tension is chewing holes in his chest. It's difficult for him to come home every day anticipating whether or not Johnathan will be in bed with his wife. Since the exposure of their affair, Tabitha cut off contact with Johnathan. She wished to give her secret lover some space until they are ready to talk about what happens next. Knowing her, she'll most likely choose to break their relationship off. She was always the one that would sacrifice what she wants for the sake of her family.

As much as it hurts, he doesn't want Tabitha to break Johnathan's heart. Johnathan loves her. It isn't fair for her to stay with him and their children if her heart belongs to someone else. If she wants Johnathan, then Simon will let her be with him. For that decision to be made by Tabitha, he has to take himself out of the picture. He has to walk away from their marriage.

He reins in his tears until he's outside and he goes inside his car. The tears finally spill from his eyes when he's driving down the neighborhood, further away from the woman that has made him a wreck.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Two hours after Simon left his house, Tabitha and her two sons are reading the note left behind by Simon. Adrian clings to his Dan's waist. The note left behind by Simon confirms what Adrian was afraid would happen.

 _ **To Tabitha, Dan, and Adrian,**_

 _ **Please don't try to look for me. I'll be gone for a while. If there's an emergency, you know what my cell phone number is.**_

 _ **I assure you, I will come back. But I need to be alone for a while. With what is going on, it's not good for me to stay at home.**_

 _ **I'm so sorry.**_

 _ **Love,**_

 _ **Simon**_

"So I don't have a dad?" Adrian whimpers. _What if dad's promise to come home someday isn't true? What if dad is a liar like his mom?_

"Shhh…" Dan hushes. "It's not like that. Dad… went on a business trip."

He scoffs. "Business trip? I'm not an idiot. Dad left us because of mom." He glares at Tabitha, who is staring at the note with glassy eyes. He's still pissed off about the affair. "Your mother is seeing someone new."

 _Mom had an affair with Phil and Fiona's dad. Two married people were fooling around with each other for the last several weeks._ Valentine's Day is in two days and his opinions about love is filled with bitter perspectives about how love brings nothing but lies.

"Adrian. Dan." Tabitha puts the note down on the kitchen table. "Why don't you go eat breakfast?"

Dan nods, a jerky up and down motion of his head. Adrian rolls his eyes. _Mom doesn't even want to talk about it?_ "I'll pass."

"But I made pancakes," Tabitha protests.

"I'll eat at school." He lets go of Dan, shoves his mom aside, and stomps up the stairs. Food is the least of his concern. _Don't worry, dad. Remember when you told me never to cheat in life? Turns out I don't need to do that. Mom is doing a great job at being a cheater._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Later on that same day, Simon and a woman stand in a dark hotel room. Their hands are all over each other. Her fingers deftly unbuttons his button-down shirt. His palms reaches underneath her dress and grabs a handful of her butt. In a minute, their clothes are strewn on various places on the floor. For the next hour, the room is filled with breathy whispers, moans, and groans.

 _Tabitha who?_

When they Don't finished, his arms hold the woman close to his body. She draws lazy patterns on his chest, humming in contentment.

"Thank you," he murmurs, kissing her forehead. After the tears he shed this morning, he needed something like this to repel his mind away from his problems.

She smiles. "You're welcome." She brings one hand up to stroke his cheek. "I'm really sorry about what's happening with your family."

"Don't be." _Tabitha should be the one that's sorry._

"I know," she says with a sigh. "But you're still married."

"It doesn't matter." _She lied to me. She destroyed us. This is my way to heal myself._ "Let's not talk about that, alright?"

They fall asleep that night with a burden carried on both of their shoulders. The law firm doesn't have to know that his working relationship with a co-worker isn't platonic outside the building. It's his life. Beyond the office, no one can control him.

* * *

~:~

* * *

They sit on a park bench a day after Simon's departure, a gloomy tension between them. Tabitha has told Johnathan that they can't see each other anymore. For Johnathan, letting her go is the most difficult thing that he's being asked to do. There's no point to convince her otherwise. Her husband left because of him.

"Can we… still be friends?" he asks her, his voice hoarse with the tears that he's holding back.

She shakes her head. "We've brought enough turmoil to our families. It's better if we leave friendship to our sons than with each other."

All he can do is nod miserably. Sacrificing is all he has done since Susan became a part of his life.

 _It's another sacrifice. Nothing I haven't already done._ he thinks miserably.

At least he's giving up on love for the sake of Phil and Dan's friendship. His son's happiness always comes first before his.

* * *

~:~

* * *

She stares at her husband in satisfaction. _I knew you'd choose me over that gold digger._ Johnathan has told Susan and the twins about his and Tabitha's decision to stop seeing each other. Susan keeps a straight face, although she's smirking in the inside. It was obvious that she was right about Tabitha being the wrong woman for him.

"However," Johnathan says, looking at Phil and Fiona. "My business with Tabitha has nothing to do with Dan, so I won't ask you two to stop seeing him."

Susan remains silent. She has nothing against Dan, but she won't entirely enjoy the fact that her children are still associated with the enemy. For now, she's content. With Tabitha out of Johnathan's life, she can no longer interfere with her family and her marriage.

* * *

 **I didn't want to do this to Tabitha and Johnathan, but I had to. Dramas aren't complete without heartbreaking breakups.**

 **So who is the woman that Simon slept with? You'll find out a little later. I know there was a lack of Phan moments in this chapter, but this chapter had to be mostly focused on how the affair is affecting everyone. After all, once you cheat, you can't take back your action. Trust me though. The Phan moments will return in the next chapter.**

 **~ AA**


	11. Wormholes and a Log Cabin

Chapter 11: Wormholes and a Log Cabin

Haiku

 _Amidst the hardship_

 _You make everything better_

 _By just being mine_

* * *

The day before Valentine's Day, the three Lester siblings are in a bedroom of Martyn's bedroom. Martyn is sitting on his bed, the words that Phil and Fiona are saying an incoherent jumble of words to his ears. He doesn't want to leave the comfort of his bed. He doesn't need the real world, and his only reason for going outside is when he needs to attend his college classes.

 _ **"C'mon Martyn. Let's go out. Just the three of us."**_

 _ **"It's no fun staying in bed all day. I thought you like being out of the house."**_

 _ **"Let's go watch a movie. The new Batman movie is out. Mom says we can go if we come back by 7."**_

 _ **"Oh! Can we order takeout after the movie? I'm in the mood for sushi."**_

 _ **"Sushi? Fi, mom is frying fish for dinner."**_

 _ **"Oh yeah…"**_

 _ **"How about some milkshakes instead?"**_

 _ **"Now you're talking."**_

"Martyn? MARTYN." Fiona claps her hands in front of their older brother's face. "He's daydreaming again."

"That's not a look of daydreaming, Fi." Phil pats Martyn's shoulder. "Martyn? Can you hear me?"

"I can hear you just fine," Martyn replies, his voice cracking. "Go without me. I don't want to spoil your fun."

Fiona pouts. "You're spoiling our fun by being in bed all day."

"No I'm not." Why won't you two go away?

"Yes you are. You've been like this since…" Fiona trails off, biting her lip. Any time she mentions about the situation of their parents, he reacts in one of two ways: yelling at her to shut up or leaving the room without saying a word. He's close to using the second reaction.

"We need to get you out of your funk," Phil says. "Do it for us. It's been a long time since the three of us hung out together."

He shakes his head. Their attempts of chasing away his depressing attitude hasn't been working. They should take a hint and leave him alone. His friends, ex-girlfriend, and parents already gave up on him. _No one wants me. No matter how many times Phil and Fiona try to make me happy, I'll end up sucked back into depression anyway. Who needs happiness for worthless people like me?_

Fiona leaves his bed and heads to the his bedroom's closet. "We're gonna miss the movie. Martyn, if you're not coming with us, I'm dragging you there. I'm not taking no for an answer."

"Fi-" Phil starts to say.

"Shut up, Phil. I've had enough of this lazy dimwit." She throws a random t-shirt, shorts, and boxers in the boys' direction. The clothes land in a small heap below Martyn's feet. "There's your clothes. Your shoes are in the living room. Get dressed." _Jesus Christ. Someone's extra bossy today._

Phil looks at him sympathetically. "We're all taking this pretty hard. But we're your family. Fiona and I care about you. One movie isn't going to kill you."

"You're putting the kill in killjoy," Fiona adds. "That ain't the Martyn we know. So get your ass out of bed."

He glances down at the clothes. It's his day off from school. The twins are deferring from homework to cheer him up. They're doing this for him. If the twins knew that his "funk" is plummeting him into more than an existential crisis, they'll be more persistent to cheer him up. Especially Fiona. Her determination has no boundaries.

 _Fi would probably tattle on mom and mom will have to bring me to a mental hospital._ Being cheered up by the twins is the annoyance of a mosquito. Being checked into a psychiatric ward by his parents will irritate him as high as a skyscraper.

"I'll go," Martyn grumbles. "But you're buying my ticket."

* * *

~:~

* * *

On the morning of Valentine's Day, Alfie and Zoe are at the school lockers. Zoe is in disbelief, staring at the sketchbook in the Alfie's hands. _This is the big surprise he boasted about all day yesterday?_ She expected flowers or chocolates, the usual cheesy gifts that he gives to her every year since they were six. She had been bracing herself for another public spectacle.

"Ummm…" _Say something, Zoe!_

His face falls. "You don't look like it? Joe told me your drawing pad was running low on pages, so I bought you a new one."

"That's… really sweet." She gives him a small smile. She genuinely appreciates Alfie's selfless purchase. She's saving 10 dollars. If Alfie wasn't teasing her at least 90% of the time, she'd be hugging him and telling him how much she loves him. _As a friend._

His expression perks back up. "Really?"

"Uh-huh." She takes the sketchbook from him. "I was rather surprised. I don't suppose you're gonna pull out a rose out of your backpack next."

"Nope. But I do have chocolates." He opens his backpack and takes out a small bag of assorted mini chocolate bars. "This one's for you. I have another one inside for the others to share."

She chuckles. There's the Alfie she knows. "Again, really sweet."

He grins. "Thank god, because I don't think there's a return for stolen goods."

What? "YOU STOLE THE CHOCOLATE?"

He bursts into laughter. "I'm joking! Geez, I love you and all, but this pretty face doesn't belong in the slammer."

She growls. _So much for hoping that he wouldn't tease me after giving me such a cool gift._ "Oh, there's something I can slam."

 _Happy Valentine's Day, Zoe. Enjoy another lovely day with this dunderhead._

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's the day after Valentine's Day. Dan is spending the afternoon alone, hiking at a nearby forest. Continuing down the grassy path, he thinks about how torturous it was to watch the overload of pinks, reds, and whites all over school, as well as the overwhelming PDA at many corners around campus. His head could have exploded from all the roses and mason jars he watched delivered by student council members during class. If he was in a relationship, he wouldn't have to wish to be one of the lucky people that received gifts by their best friend or significant other. He could have had a boyfriend by now if things worked out with Phil.

 _"So your mom."_

 _"Your dad."_

 _"They're together."_

 _"And we never saw it coming."_

 _"Did you ever notice any signs?"_

 _"None. My mom never told me about having any male friends since we moved here."_

 _"What's going to happen with us?"_

 _"Us?"_

 _"Yeah. We like each other. I want to date you."_

 _"I want to date you too."_

 _"But we can't do that. Fiona AND my mom will hate you if we spring this up on them while our families are still hurting."_

 _"Ugh. You're right. What are we gonna do? Our lives are a soap opera come to life. This is the part in the soap opera where we're gonna give up on a love that never started for the love we have for our families."_

 _"Wow. Louise and her foreign soaps. Our lives are messed up."_

 _"It is. I'm sick of standing here talking about our parents when all I want to do is kiss you."_

 _"I want to kiss you too. But think about it. If we give in to our desires now and we get caught, my mom will definitely try to keep us apart."_

 _"Just your mom?"_

 _"She's the wicked witch of the west, according to Martyn."_

 _"She's really strict."_

 _"Exactly. So I think we should wait until things settle down. Wait until our parents talk things out."_

 _"When they talk things out. They're still avoiding each other like they have the swine flu."_

 _"Well, when they make things right, that's when we can be more than best friends."_

"When will there be a soap opera that doesn't involve forbidden love?" Dan mumbles. _Remember to ask Louise if there are any foreign soap operas that don't have dramatic storylines._

Since the affair's reveal, he, Phil, and Fiona haven't been spending time at each other's houses, resulting in him and Phil unable to spend time with each another outside of school. His mother hasn't forbid him from having the twins as his friends, but the twins' parents weren't as understanding. Johnathan doesn't care about the trio's friendship, whereas Susan doesn't want anything to do with the Howells, who loathes Tabitha so much that she's trying her best to allow her offspring to still have her enemy's son as her offspring's friend. _"We're lucky mom likes you. And it's not like she can follow us 24/7. She can't stalk us at school."_

Several feet ahead, he spots something beyond a thicket of trees. He picks up his pace. He skids to a stop when he comes across the majestic sight in front of him.

A log cabin looms a few meters away. The only sound is the chirping of birds and a slight gust of wind. His feet makes crackling noises on decaying leaves on the ground as he walks closer to the cabin. When he pushes the door, it swings open with a creak.

"Hello?" he calls out. All he's greeted with is silence. He steps further into the cabin. Every step he makes draws another whining creak on the wooden floor. The square centimeters of space that he's in seems to be where a living room would be. Aside from clouds of dust, there are no objects in sight. _Looks like the cabin must've been abandoned for quite a while._

For the next several minutes, he surveys the rest of the cabin. Except for the three little steps leading to the cabin's porch, the cabin lacks a staircase. There are three light switches for the three main areas of the cabin, although the lightbulbs on the ceiling looks like it hasn't been changed for years. Jagged holes from the rooftop brings in slivers of sunlight inside, and the walls are caked with debris.

He questions if he's the first person to stumble across the cabin. _Wouldn't hikers have used this as a hideout or something by now?_ With the inside of the cabin scarce with items, he imagines how a few hours of cleaning and a little bit of furnishing can turn the uninhabited building into a cozy shack.

"Phil would love it here," he comments. _I can bring a blanket, maybe a few pillows and a candle. We can hang out here._

He grins. The cabin can be a place for him and Phil to hang out at away from their friends. Someday, he will show the cabin to his friends, but in the meantime, the building can be a place where he and Phil can spend time with each other without another human in a one-foot radius. He's sure that Phil won't mind the walking that they'd have to do to get here.

 _This can be our home away from home. This will be our place when our problems won't matter._

* * *

~:~

* * *

In a hotel room on the 9th floor, Simon and a woman lay cuddled in bed. The sun peeks over the horizon, bringing in a narrow ray of light through the glass windows.

"Simon?" the woman whispers.

"Hm?"

"When do you plan to go home?"

He shrugs, pushing away a strand of her hair away from her face. "I'm not quite ready to go home yet."

"But you will eventually. Right?"

He nods. _This is my home right here. What's happening with Tabitha is not my problem. It's hers._ "Let's go to work." Work is a distraction, his solace, one of two things that he loves that isn't a backstabber. The other one is the woman that sleeps and wakes up next to him in his hotel room, a pleasant distraction that he, in some way, loves more than his wife.

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's midday on the last weekend of February. Two boys are walking along a hiking trail, on their way to a place that Dan is eager to show Phil. They've been hiking for a little over a half hour and Phil feels like he'll pass out at any minute.

"Dan! I'm tired. How much farther are we going." _Is he trying to lead me to my death or something?_

"We're almost there."

 _It doesn't seem like it!_ "You said that 10 minutes ago. I'm losing salt and water from my body."

"Then drink some water from your gigantic water bottle." _Damn, I should've brought more water if I knew this was how far we'd be walking._

"You said we were going on a picnic. You didn't tell me we'd be walking for almost a freaking hour in 90 plus degree heat." _Good thing I have sunscreen on._

"Patience, Phil. All in due time." Dan stops, turning around to face Phil. "There. Can you see it?"

"See what?" The hike has left Phil with blurry vision and he's on the verge of fainting if he doesn't get some rest soon.

"Here." Dan yanks the water bottle from his hand, uncapping the bottle cap. "Drink first." Dan tilts the opening of the bottle into his mouth. He gulps down the tasteless liquid greedily. About a fourth of the bottle's contents is gone by the time he's back to being hydrated.

"Thanks," he wheezes. "Now what did you want me to see?"

Dan screws the bottle cap back on the bottle. "We have a house."

"A house?" Confused, his eyes looks ahead. "How did you…?" His eyes widen in surprise when he spots a cabin at the end of the grassy path. He gapes, dozens of thoughts racing in his mind all at once.

 _How had I not known there was a cabin here?_ He's not an exercising guru, though he goes on jogs every now and then to keep himself fit. He has only hiked twice in his life for field trips; his shriveling lungs by the end of those hikes is why exercise isn't his preferable pastime. But Martyn would have mentioned if he ever came across a cabin in the woods when he goes on hikes with his friends.

Dan pats him on his shoulders. "Since you don't like hiking, I thought showing you this cabin could encourage you to hike with me."

"Getting fit wasn't your New Years Resolution." _Or mine in my entire life._

Dan chuckles. "It isn't." He takes a step back from him. "Come and check it out! We didn't hike all this way for nothing."

He groans, his legs unwilling to do any more walking. "I don't wanna."

"That's okay." Phil lets out a shriek as Dan positions his arms around his back and legs, picking him up effortlessly and carrying the exhausted teen toward the cabin.

"What are you doing!" Phil exclaims. "Put me down!"

"You said you were tired!"

"I am! But I can walk!"

"Walk when we get inside."

"Dan, we're not married."

"Doesn't matter." He tilts his head and meets Dan's eyes. The brunette boy's brown eyes gazes at him with such affection that he wants to grab Dan's face and kiss him, an action that Phil desires since the Muse concert. _You're everything to me and much more. You have no idea how much it's killing me not to be with you._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Meanwhile, in the Suggs' house, Alfie and Zoe are struggling to finish their art project. Their oral presentation is coming up and they still haven't planned out what they are going to say.

"Alfs! Do me a favor and get your lazy ass up." _If he's expecting me to finish this by myself, I swear to god, I'll stab his balls with these colored pencils._

"Ah… no." He lies back on her bed and continues to play Clash of Titans on his phone. "I'm still taking a break."

She glares at him, dropping an orange colored pencil down on her desk. "Your break ended five minutes ago."

"A couple more minutes, lady love." Is he fucking kidding me?

"Alfie!" she whines. "Our project is due on Friday. We barely started coloring our comic. There's no time for fucking breaks!"

He sighs. He throws his phone aside and joins her back at her desk, sitting down on the stool that he carried from downstairs in the Suggs' kitchen. "Zoe, you need to calm down."

"CALM DOWN?" She picks up a random colored pencil and points the stick's sharp end at his face. "It's Saturday. I don't want to do all nighters during the school week. We have to get this done now so we have time to practice for our oral presentation."

"ZOE." He grabs on both of her shoulders. "Stop stressing out. We're a team. We can do this. We can triumph anything. We'll finish our project by tomorrow. If we don't, I'll finish the rest for you."

"Alfs." She lets out a shaky breath. Their project stressed them out during winter break, and they were wrapped up in other school commitments that they put their art project in the back burner for the first several weeks of the second semester. For the entire week, they focused on drawing their portions of their horror-romantic comic. Procrastination is a bitch. She hates when teachers reiterate about how it's not good to put work off until the last minute, but it's what she's used to doing. Her unchanging bad habit comes with the price of numerous cans of Red Bull, which she has in the kitchen's mini fridge, ready to consume for their art project.

"We're Team Zalfie," he tells her with a reassuring grin. He picks up a gray colored pencil and starts to color a table in one of the comic's panels. "Stress isn't a good color on you, love."

"Stress isn't even a color," Zoe retorts, though a small smile emerges on her lips. "But you're right, so let's finish this bad boy up." _It's once in a blue moon when he isn't acting like an idiot. Why can't he be like this all the time?_

* * *

~:~

* * *

Inside an abandoned cabin in the woods, Phil stares at the makeshift picnic area that Dan prepared in the cabin's living room area. Ever since Dan found the log cabin two weeks ago, he had been coming by on weekends to do some early spring cleaning. He bought a broom and a feather duster and brought trash bags to transform the cabin into a decent living space. With the help of his mom, who he reluctantly informed about his plans, he fetched some old things from home to leave in the cabin.

"Holy mackerel." Phil gapes. "When did you do this?"

"I came by early this morning to set it up." Two beach towels are spread out on the wooden floor. When the two boys came in, they put their hiking gear down to allow Phil to explore the entire cabin. Dan witnessed similar amazed expressions on Phil's face as he basks in his handiwork for the last several days. As Phil continues to explore the entire cabin, Dan opens his backpack and starts to prepare the lunch that he prepared for him and Phil.

Dan is opening a Ziploc of plastic silverware when Phil joins Dan at the beach towels. "You said this wasn't a date."

"It's not." _But I want it to be._

"Liar," Phil waggles his eyebrows at Dan. "You're totally using the cabin to do a makeshift date night."

"More like date afternoon." _Date afternoon? Dan, save the bad puns when you're not trying to impress your crush._

"I'm not complaining." Phil sits on one of the beach towels, cross-legged, taking another swig of water from his bottle. "If you want this to be a date, then let's make it a date."

"It's not a date when I didn't ask 'will you go out with me?' beforehand." _Which I wanted to do so badly._

"So was going to see Muse. You were indirectly asking me on a date."

"Was I?"

"Isn't it obvious?"

 _I thought I was the only one that wanted that concert to be a date._ "We were two friends that went to see our favorite band in concert. It wasn't a date."

Phil sighs. "Did you want it to be?"

He puts the silverware down. He copies Phil's sitting position, facing the raven-haired teen. "Why are you asking?"

Phil scoots closer to Dan until their legs touch. He hides the shudder that runs through his body at the physical contact. "Because I'm sick of our parents' situation dictating our feelings for each other. I'm tired of seeing my dad keep straight face when I know he's dying on the inside."

"You're tired of seeing your dad unhappy? My dad left us." Dan grimaces. "With my dad gone, mom is not only sad about not seeing your dad, but she's sad about not having my dad around. You have a full set of parents. I have half the set." _I had a full set two months ago._

"Either way, our parents' problem is the reason why we can't be together." Phil makes a scorned expression. "I hate how their problems have to affect us. I could have a boyfriend by now if we didn't find out about the affair before we talked about what to do with our relationship."

 _We didn't ask to be dragged down._ It wasn't their fault that they couldn't be together. They don't live in a third-world country. They have every right to be in a relationship if they want to. The two of them are held back since the happiness of their loved ones is at stake if they choose love over family. Their feelings will hurt more than one person.

"Fuck our families," He declares. "I like you. You like me. That's what matters, right? We're lucky. There are other people who love someone that don't love them back. By not being together, we're insulting those people." This is love, so why are we holding back?

Phil nods. "But what about our parents? Our friends? My mom's not gonna like hearing the news that I'm dating the son with a mother that's dating my father. And let's think about Fiona too. This is the first time that I failed one of my own master plans. We know that my sister really likes you. How do you think she'll feel when she finds out that her crush is going out with her brother?"

"So we don't tell her." He reaches out for Phil's wrists, holding them firmly in his hands. "If our parents were able to keep their relationship a secret, we can do the same. Let's keep this to ourselves." The tender gaze that Phil makes towards him causes another shudder to run through his body. "I've waited for this since December. Please Phil. Give this a try. Be my boyfriend. I've never felt this way for anyone before. You're the kind of person that really gets me. You make me want to go on long walks on the beach with you, and I don't even like going to the beach."

Phil laughs. The sound sends a surge of joy to his heart. _See? This is why I like you._ "That's too bad, because I'd love to see you in nothing but swim trunks."

 _I too would love to see you in your swimwear._ "Why go to the beach when we can do that right here?"

Phil raises an eyebrow. "Are you seducing me, Dan?"

Dan smirks. "Go out with me and we can make that happen."

A wide range of emotions is evident on Phil's face as silence falls between the pair. Dan is anxious to hear Phil's response. _What if he says no? God, please don't say no, Phil. Don't think about your parents or your sister. Think about me. Think about us. I chose love, Phil. Please choose love too._ Every day that passes, he falls more in love with Phil. If they could explore the possibilities of their love together, then he could be saying "I love you" to Phil by the end of the year.

"Okay."

His heart skips a beat. "What?"

"Okay." Phil smiles, surprising Dan when he suddenly pulls his wrists away from Dan and wraps his arms around Dan's neck. "Yes, I'll go out with you." Phil touches his forehead against Dan's. "I'm yours, Dan. I'm yours for as long as you want me."

* * *

~:~

* * *

Five minutes until midnight, Alfie and Zoe are still working tirelessly on their school project in the Zoe's bedroom. His eyes are drooping, and he's pushing himself to finish coloring the final panel of his part of the comic. _Just a little bit more and you can go to asleep._ He yawns. _Don't resort to the Red Bull._

He hears a soft snore from next to him. He stops coloring. He turns his head and finds her asleep, the side of her head flat against the table. _Lady love always looks so cute when she's sleeping._ He smiles. As tired as he is, he remembers the promise that he made earlier. _"We'll finish our project by tomorrow. If we don't, I'll finish the rest for you."_ He said the words, and he plans to go through with it.

He glances down at her work. She too is on her last page of her coloring part. _She's been working just as hard as me. She deserves a break._ He slowly slides the papers away from her and sets them down on his side of the table. He stands up from his stool, going to her bed to grab her blanket. He drapes the cotton material over her shoulders.

"Sweet dreams, love," he whispers, the sits back down on his stool and resumes coloring the comic. _The things I'll do for love._

* * *

 **Yay! I'm happy that I finally got Dan and Phil together, even if they are gonna be seeing each other in secret. I think I got a little sappy there, but that's what fluff moments are about, right? I was trying to make it all teleserye-like, with the cuteness and the lines that feeds to the moment. In my opinion, cute moments are when the lines are deep and there's a shit ton of meaningful stares (I wish there's more of those kind of moments in American TV shows outside of the CW channel because damn, those shows kill it with those stares).**

 **~ AA**


	12. Tunnel Ends and a Death

Chapter 12: Tunnel Ends and a Death

Haiku

 _There's always an end_

 _So take matters in your hands_

 _And do it right now_

* * *

It's the first day of March. The sun is setting, casting dimming light in a bedroom of the Lester residence. Downstairs, Susan and the twins are preparing dinner. Martyn is staring at a gun in his hands, which he managed to get his hands on, thanks to one of his friends. _I don't need a license. I'll only need to use it once._

He grips the gun tighter. He's giving himself a few more days. He's doing what he can to give his life some sort of meaning before he takes it away. There's no point for him to live when he isn't important to the world. _The earth doesn't need me. I'm wasting oxygen the longer I'm here._

He questions what it'll be like on the other side. He hopes heaven will be better than the real world. Heaven is supposed to be a peaceful place, a place that accepts anyone. In heaven, his faults won't matter. Heaven is transitioning from high school to college: what you do in high school doesn't affect you in college, because college is the place to start fresh.

With a sigh, he opens his drawer and buries it underneath his clothes. He has to hide the portable weapon properly. Susan can be nosy; she'll assume the worst if she finds the gun.

His mind is in a dark place. He has to find the light, and his only option that he has to find the light is to meet his ultimate end.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Alfie and Zoe walk out of their drawing and painting class, relief etched on both of their faces. Their oral presentation for their group art project was a major success. Their classmates were completely attentive at their horror-romance comic. All of their peer feedback was positive, and the paired team answered the few questions that their teacher asked following their presentation.

He pumps his fist in the air. "Success! We're so gonna get an A on this."

"I wouldn't call us safe just yet, Alfs," she tells him. "Christy and Rose had a pretty good presentation too."

 _Good? I was about to fall asleep with theirs. Who names their main character Prudence?_ "True, but ours rocked way more than them." He swings his arms over their shoulders. "This is why I support team Zalfie. If we were a couple, team Zalfie would be invincible."

"We can be invincible without me being your girlfriend." She ducks and escapes his arm, bringing his arm back to his hip. "But really, we are a good team."

He beams. Despite the repetitive practice for their presentation, the stress was worth spending one-on-one time with her. _If I'm lucky, maybe Mrs. Hamm will have one more group assignment for us to do outside of class. I need all the hours I can get to make lady love fall for me._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Deep in a forest, two boys are roaming outside a log cabin. They've just finished doing their homework and are taking a break by playing hide-and-seek. The game may be childish for two 11th graders, but it's their way of having fun.

"Phil…" Dan shouts in a singsong voice. "Come out, come out, wherever you are."

Behind a tree, Phil giggles. _Good luck trying to find me here._

It has been a week since Dan and Phil chose to pursue a relationship. Seven days of covert glances, kisses, and hand-holding. With Dan's job at Dillion's starting on Monday, the two of them are spending as much time with each other as they can before their part-time jobs will give them less time to be together.

"Phil, where are you?" Palms against the tree bark, he turns his head. _Where's Dan? I thought he was getting closer._

"Found you!" He looks around the forest. Dan is nowhere in sight, although Phil was sure that he heard Dan's voice loud and clear.

"Where are you?" He calls out.

"Look up." He angles his head upward. Dan is perched on a branch on a tree next to where he is. "I must say, you were too easy to find."

He sticks his tongue out. "Shut up. How did you get up there without me noticing?"

"I have my ways." Dan climbs down from the tree, landing on the ground in a flourish. "I was Tarzan in a past life."

He rolls his eyes, but remains smiling at the brunette. "Show off."

Dan chuckles. He snakes his arms around Phil's waist. "I'm your show off." He pecks Phil's nose. "Now you count and I'll hide."

 _I'm so happy to have him. What more can I ask for?_

* * *

~:~

* * *

Meanwhile, at a park, Johnathan and Tabitha sit side-by-side on a bench. He's gazing at the woman with a sullen expression. He hasn't seen her for days, so when she asked him to meet her at the park, he assumed that she chose for them to resume their secret meetings. It had broken his heart when she told him that they couldn't see each other anymore. He respected her wishes, even though it pained him to be without the person that brought the happiness that he desired all of his life.

"Tabitha… don't do this to me. We already called off our relationship. That was less painful than what you're asking me to do." I _never knew how a true breakup felt until you came into my life._

"I know it is." She rests her hand atop of his. "But Susan is still your wife. When Simon left me, he gave me a wake-up call. He left because of us. He's hurting because of me." A tear slips from her eye. "When he comes back, I'm going to give our marriage another chance, and you should do the same for Susan."

"What about us?" He's desperate for her to see reason. He allowed himself to let her go, but he can't allow himself to give his heart for Susan. _I gave my heart to you. We love each other. Why are we giving that up?_

"There's no us." The sight of her teary eyes stings at his chest. "What we had was fun, but you and I both know that this wasn't going to last forever. We have families. There's no room for me in your life as nothing more than a friend."

 _How can you do this to me?_ He had a plan to tell her he loves her, but Susan ruined it when she confronted them at the bar. Every good thing that ever happens in his life is taken away because of the woman that he calls his wife. Had he controlled his alcohol content that night at his friend's party, he would have had his life on track.

"I'll file for divorce," he says. "It was on my mind before we met, and now I have a reason to do it. You said that you didn't love Simon anymore. You can do the same with him." He locks his eyes on her, using his blue orbs to aid his persuasion. "Don't give up on us. I love you, Tabitha. We've only known each other for a few months, but I've never loved anyone as much as I love you." He doesn't care if this isn't his ideal moment to tell her that he loves her. If the words are enough for her to change her mind, then he'll put his emotions at a vulnerable position.

"No," she tells him firmly. _No, no, no, no._ "I love you too, Johnathan, so this is why I want you to give your marriage a chance. Love changes people. If you try to love Susan, maybe she'll change."

"I don't love Susan!" he shouts. His change in tone startles her, so he lowers his voice. "I tried to, and look where that lead us. I put up with her for my kids. My kids are old enough to know that our family is different from others. If I annul my marriage with Susan, they won't have to deal with our bickering anymore."

"I understand that. But this is real life. Love doesn't always win."

Yes it does. He puts his head in his hands. "I can't believe you're doing this to me again." _Once again, all because of Susan._

She sighs. "I'll be okay, Johnathan. I'm choosing to do the right thing, and I hope that someday we can look back on our relationship and realize that the right choice may be painful now, but everything will work out in the end."

* * *

~:~

* * *

That night, Tabitha sits alone on her bed in the Howell residence, sobbing after the conversation that she had with Johnathan at the park. No matter how much she wants to take back her words, the world will continue to go against her if she fights it with love. She has to make sacrifices for the greater good. Her happiness will mean nothing if her loved ones will suffer as a result.

A pair of arms wrap around her shoulders. "Mom… is this about…?"

 _Who else would it be?_ "I'm fine, Dan. Go back to your room."

"Mom…"

"Go." _I don't want you to see me like this._

A couple of minutes pass before she feels the arms draw away. "Fight for him, mom."

 _Oh Dan. If you only knew how much I wish I can do that._ "I can't."

"Yes you can." She looks up, seeing him smiling at her reassuringly through her watery vision. "You've done so much for me and Adrian. If you really care about Mr. Lester, don't let anyone hold you back. Sometimes a right decision can be a wrong one if all it does leaves you unhappy in the end."

* * *

~:~

* * *

On the weekend before the start of spring break, Martyn is in his bedroom, sitting as his desk where he typically works on schoolwork, writing the last words in his lifetime. A miniscule part of him is echoing at him to change his mind. _It's not too late. You can still turn your life around._ He bumps the thought out of his mind. All he ever wanted was to have a normal family. His siblings are the only ones that accept him for who he is. _I'd include dad in the list too if he had the balls to tell mom that I still deserve to be loved even if I'm not her model child._

He signs his name at the end of his letter. His end is near. He can feel it in his fingertips. He puts his pen down and proofreads the two folder papers.

 ** _To whom it may concern,_**

 _ **By the time you read this, I'll already be gone. For the past weeks, I haven't been in the best shape. Phil and Fiona have noticed, and I tremendously thank you two for trying to cheer me up. I owe you a debt of gratitude for being there for me. What you don't know is that my state of mind has been going down since dad told me that he cheated on mom. I'm not upset that the affair happened. In fact, I'm glad that dad found someone that doesn't yell at him all the time. I'm upset because dad found love in someone that's already married. I don't care if it causes a rift between him and mom. I care that his relationship is ruining the family of his mistress.**_

 _ **The affair wasn't the only thing that drove me to make this decision. I've already been like this way before Mrs. Howell came into your lives. For years, I tried to be a good son. Even though I didn't academically do well in school, I made up for that in sports. At school, I felt appreciated. My classmates didn't mind my grades. No matter how much I hated school, I went because that was where I found people that cared about me. At home, I count the hours and minutes until I can get out of the house.**_

 _ **I know what you're all thinking. Why didn't I tell you? Why didn't I ask for help? Why did I heed to death's call? To be honest, even if I did say something, it wouldn't have changed anything. I'd still be coming home to a shitty family. Nothing I do is ever enough. I'll never be a trophy child. When I got an athletic scholarship to go to college, what did mom tell me? "You could have gotten an academic scholarship if you studied harder." What did dad tell me? "Have something to fall back on if basketball doesn't work out." Only Phil and Fiona told me how proud they were about my achievement. "When you're famous, invite us to your basketball games," Phil had said. "My big bro's gonna be the next Michael Jordan," Fiona had said.**_

 _ **Don't you see? I'm never good enough for this family. Because I'm the older brother, you expect me to be the model child. When I can't live up to your expectations, you compare me to my own brother and sister. Do you know how hard it is to hear that all the time? To be belittled by the people that made me? Call this my last resort to get your attention. I don't give a shit anymore. My efforts were all in vain. Maybe this effort will succeed instead of being flawed for once.**_

 _ **My last message to you all is this: please fix the family.**_

 ** _Dad, do me a favor and just get a divorce from mom already. I can see how much sadder you've been without Mrs. Howell. Phil told me her husband left indefinitely, so this is your chance to be with her for real. Don't mind what the twins and I think. If Mrs. Howell makes you happy, then don't let her slip away. Anything to stop making you and mom argue all the damn time._**

 ** _Phil and Fiona, you two can laugh at this, but YOLO. You only live once, so make the best of your lives. Stick by your friends through thick and thin. They're the ones that know you best. Fiona, don't be mad at me for saying this, but Dan doesn't like you. The few times I've seen him, he doesn't look at you the way you look at him. He only wants you as a friend. If I were you, I'd give up on him and go for someone else. I'm telling you this because I don't want to see you heartbroken again. Stop now before you fall in love and the emotional pain will hurt you more later. Find someone that will love you the way Bella loves Edward (what's with the appeal of those sparkly vampires?) Phil, go find yourself a boyfriend or girlfriend (idk if you're bi/asexual). Like geez man, you're 17 and you haven't had your first kiss yet. When I was 17, I was getting blowjobs. Giving and receiving. You need to get some action. Even your friend that keeps teasing your other friend is doing better than you in the love department._**

 _ **Mom… no matter how much of a bitch you are, I still love you. You're still my mother. I hope that one day, you'll sit down and reassess your actions. I want you to see that you need to put other people's needs first before yours. You aren't the queen bee of everything. You aren't perfect. Some things are beyond your control, and you just have to live with that. When dad chooses Mrs. Howell over you, understand him. Let him be happy, because you're the reason for his misery.**_

 _ **To anyone outside my family, remember this. When things go wrong, do everything that you can to make it right. There's always a light at the end of every tunnel. Sadly, the tunnel lost its light a long time ago.**_

 _ **Love,**_

 _ **Martyn Marlo Lester**_

He folds the two papers and leaves it on the table. He picks up the gun. The weapon is as cold as his chest. His soul is empty. He feels nothing. "Goodbye, everyone."

He points the gun to his temple. The sound of a gunshot reverberates around the house.

In seconds, a human heart ceases to beat.

* * *

~:~

* * *

People are stirred awake. Four family members race into a bedroom, screaming and crying when they find a crippled body on the floor, blood tricking from the head. A father calls for an ambulance. A mother cradles the body in her arms. A brother and a sister kneel next to their mother, yelling at a lifeless body to hold on.

Sirens wail. Neighbors stand run outside their houses to see what the commotion is. EMT workers barge into the room and place the corpse on a stretcher. A father tells the two siblings to stay behind while he and his wife go to the hospital.

The brother and sister collapse on the floor. They hug each other, crying for the wasted life of their older sibling. Sometime later, the boy stands up, finding a letter addressed to them on the table. Together, the siblings read their brother's last words. They cry even more when they realize that they should have noticed the signs of their brother's deteriorating neurological state.

If they had done more than they did, they would have been able to save his life.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Meanwhile, at one of the city's hospitals, Susan stares blankly at the white walls of the hospital's waiting area. Johnathan is sitting next to her, hands folded on his lap, frequently checking the time on his phone. _Why? He didn't have to do this. I let him do what he wants. Wasn't that what he wanted? Why would he want to take his life?_

"Mr. and Mrs. Lester?"

She instantly rises from her chair. "How is he?"

The gray-haired physician gazes at her sadly. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Lester. Your son was dead upon arrival to the hospital."

She freezes. She shakes her head. _It can't be true._ "No…" He can't be dead. I can't lose my son.

"My deepest condolences," the physician says. "Now if you'll excuse me." He brushes past the grieving mother, leaving her and her husband to deal with their loss.

"It's her fault," she hisses. "It's that bastard's fault that Martyn is dead. Our son is dead because of her." She glares at Johnathan, who stares at her in silence. _I'm right, aren't I? Martyn would still be here if that stupid Tabitha didn't steal my husband._

"What? You aren't gonna say anything?" Her fists hit his chest. "TALK TO ME, JOHN. IT'S TABITHA'S FAULT THAT MARTYN IS GONE."

"Shut up!" He bellows, pushing her away. "We lost our son, and you're blaming Tabitha for it? That is a new low." He turns around, facing away from her. "I'm done."

 _That's what you always say._ "For now."

"No." He glares at her from the corner of his eye. "I'm done. I can't do this anymore. I hate having to see you everyday and be reminded that I'm married to someone I don't love."

"John, our son just died. Are you telling me you want a divorce?"

He shakes his head. "No divorce. That will hurt the twins. I just… I need space from you. I need to move out."

"Move out? You can't do that!" she responds, her words laced with fury.

"Yes I can. I lost her because of you. You know what she asked me? She asked me to try to love you. She gave up on us because she thought about our family." He lets out a heaved sigh. "I can't do it. I'm done giving you chances to prove me that I'm capable of loving you. It's not her fault that Martyn's dead. We should have been better parents to him. Especially you."

"John-"

He cuts her off. "Before you ask me about Phil and Fiona, yes. I did think about them. If I couldn't be a father to Martyn, I can still be a good father to them, even if I don't live with them. They're old enough to take care of themselves."

He walks away before she can give her rebuttal. Fuming, she sits back down on a chair, crossing her arms. _How dare he! That thick skull of his isn't thinking right. He can't move out. No good husband is supposed to leave his wife right after her son has died._

She groans. "Stop it, Susan. Don't focus on John now." The image of Martyn's body cools down her fury. Shoulders slumped, she stands up and walks in the opposite direction, off to pay a visit to her deceased son.

* * *

 **I'll give you guys a moment of silence.**

 **I've never written a death scene before. My mind has gone to dark places, but never to a point where I contemplate suicide. This was incredibly hard for me to write. I listened to 24 Floors by The Maine in repeat to capture Martyn's emotions. I can't imagine what it'll be like when I become a nurse and I'd have to be the one that gives these kind of bad news to loved ones.**

 **I should've said this on the first chapter, so I'll say this now. Every character has a story. Not just Dan and Phil. Martyn may not be the star of the fic, but he had a story to tell too, even if he did meet an unfortunate end.**

 **~ AA**


	13. Leaning Shoulders and an Inevitability

Chapter 13: Leaning Shoulders and an Inevitability

Haiku

 _When one has fallen_

 _It's up to you to stand up_

 _And live one more day_

* * *

On a morning one day following the death of Martyn, the friends sit in a circle at the park, underneath a tree where Phil and Fiona's names were etched. Once again, the entire group sit in shock by another piece of surprising news delivered.

"I… ummm…" PJ is at a loss for words. Saying "I'm sorry" to them would be utter crap. Phil and Fiona lost their brother. _I can't be sorry for something I'm not responsible for._

"He didn't deserve this," Louise murmurs. She looks at the twins in sympathy. "Did he say why he killed himself?"

"He wrote a letter." Phil reaches into the pocket of his jacket and places Martyn's final letter in the center of their circle. "He did it because he thought mom and dad didn't love him."

"That's insane!" Joe exclaims. "Every parent loves their child. I know your mom is strict and all, but even the coldest of mothers still loves their child."

"Mom loved him," Fiona tells him. "She cried so much when we found him dead."

With PJ sitting at Phil's right, he leans forward and grabs the papers. He unfolds the two papers, skimming through the letter. _Damn. Poor Martyn. If I knew how depressed he was, I would've tried to help him._

Alfie nudges his shoulder. "Can I see?"

He nods. "We're not close with Martyn, but this is just gut-wrenching."

As he stares at the mourning faces of his two best friends, he thinks about the last paragraph of Martyn's letter. _"When things go wrong, do everything that you can to make it right. There's always a light at the end of every tunnel."_ His personal dilemma of fighting his crush over Christy is nothing compared to how Martyn must have felt about his life. Why is he here thinking that he's wrong to stay away from his crush when he stole her first kiss? Why is he wondering if Christy likes him when he can merely ask her himself?

Martyn felt that he didn't have hope, but for an entirely different reason. For PJ, he does have hope. He has to be optimistic. He's still living and breathing. His teenage years shouldn't be taken for granted.

If only it hadn't taken a human life for him to make that realization.

* * *

~:~

* * *

On nighttime of that same day, Fiona lies in bed, thinking about Martyn's last words to her from his letter. _"He doesn't look at you the way you look at him."_ She spent months pinning for Dan. Would she give up on him because of one negative opinion? Would it be selfish of her to discard her brother's advice and continue to pin after her crush?

She hugs her pillow close to her chest. If only Martyn was aware of how deep her feelings runs for Dan. Dan had given her a meaningful Christmas gift. If he only sees her as a friend, he would have only bought a couple of candles or lotion from Bath and Body Works. Instead, he had given her a gift set. A gesture like that can only come from a boy that's in love with a girl. _I love Dan. I'm not in love with him yet, but I'm pretty sure I'm getting there._

When he comes to visit her, he always insists on playing Super Smash Bros with her: the first video game that they ever played together. He kept smiling at her when they slow-danced during the Halloween dance. He often asks her and Phil to stay over for dinner whenever they come over to his house. He goes to Leroy's on afternoons on Tuesdays and Thursdays, the two days of the week when she and Phil are working. _Don't those count as signs? How can Martyn say that Dan doesn't like me if Dan always seems to want to be with me?_

Dan is a real gentleman. He's being old-fashioned and courting her. That's why he hasn't made a move on her yet. If he only wanted her body, he would have done so by now. He's taking it slow, waiting for the right time to make his confession.

She grins. As much as she respects Martyn, this is one thing that he's wrong about. Her feelings aren't one-sided. All she has to do is be wait.

If she's too hasty, her emotions will backfire on her.

* * *

~:~

* * *

The Wednesday of spring break, two boys sit outside the porch of a log cabin. Phil's parents are under the impression that they are going on a hike to brainstorm for a class assignment. It's becoming increasingly harder for him to come up with excuses to use on his friends and family, but the white lies are worth spending a few hours with the boy whose hand he's holding. _And to think, I'm doing exactly what dad and Dan's mom did._

"How's Fiona doing?" Dan asks, his eyes filled with concern. "She lost against me while playing Smash Bros two days ago and miscounted my change when I came to see you guys yesterday at Leroy's. I don't mean to pry, but she hasn't been herself since Martyn died."

A bird flies above their hands. The serene quality of the forest is a contrast to the outside world. The outside world is a fast-paced environment. In the woods, it seems as if time is still, remaining constant despite the changes that occurs beyond nature. Phil wishes that he and Dan could stay here forever. Whenever they come to the cabin, their problems melt away. The cabin is their sanctuary where nothing can tear them apart.

"She's a wreck." He rests his head on Dan's shoulders. "I've been trying to be strong for her, though I'm more worried about my mom and dad. They've been more distant lately. They're busy trying to plan the funeral and stuff, but other than that, I don't see them talking to each other. I just… I don't know. No one saw this coming, Dan. I didn't ask God to take Martyn away from us. He told us he was fine, and I took his word for it. I should've known he wasn't. I should've looked straight into his eyes and seen the hidden meaning behind his words."

"It's not your fault that he's dead." Dan squeezes his hand. "It was his choice. I've never had anyone in my family die before, so I can't relate to how you're feeling. But I'm here for you. I don't want you to be alone. I'll be your crying shoulder."

He snickers, recalling the tune of the song that Dan sang on karaoke when he and Fiona visited his house for the first time. "I'll be better when I'm older."

"I'll be the greatest fan of your life…" Dan sings along.

He smiles. The last few days were rough, yet being with Dan is his antidote. Dan is the cure to the poison brought by the adults' issues. Before he met Dan, he thought that love only existed in novels. His mom and dad weren't the best examples of true love. He's the only one from his friends that never had a crush on anyone. As he got older, he thought that he was meant to live a life without romantic love, a clarity that he was content with – until he laid eyes on Dan for the first time eight months ago.

"How do you want to die?" Dan asks following the comfortable minutes of silence.

He lifts his head from Dan's shoulder. "Why do you ask?"

Dan shrugs. "I was thinking about your brother's letter. 'You only live once, so make the best of your lives.' Death is inevitable. No matter what we do, we're all gonna leave the earth someday. If you outlive your loved ones, you'd have to keep dealing with the pain of losing one more person until you're the only one left. What's the point of doing what we're doing when we're most likely gonna die alone anyway, when what we're doing will be pointless since no one is immortal? Until God falls down from the sky and tells us to 'chill out,' how can we as humans guarantee a long and meaningful life?"

"Everyone dies, which is why we should live each day as if it were our last." He tilts his head up, gazing at the parts of the sky outlined by the clouds and the canopy of leaves and tree branches. "Everything happens for a reason. When God says it's time, it's time, I think that's why Martyn chose to end his life. I'm not saying that he deserved to die. He was too young for that to happen. But God must have given him a reason why he'd prefer heaven over reality. He'd still be here if his fighting spirit to live didn't die down. There are so many things I wish I could've done for him."

"That doesn't answer my question."

He chuckles. "Well… how would you want to die, Dan?"

Dan hums. "Fast and painless, I guess. All those scenes in movies when a character gets shot and only has a few minutes to tell their goodbyes is stupid. No one knows when they're gonna die, so they take their lives for granted. Then when they die unexpectedly, everyone will stay stuff like 'I wish I did this' crap. If you die slow and painful, the people who are watching you die will feel as if they're dying along with you. If you die instantly, at least it's done. It saves a few extra minutes of hoping for a miracle, only for that person to die anyway."

 _Damn, this is like Dan's explanation about Mudkip when I asked him about his favorite Pokemon._ "Well… imagine if a meteor strikes the earth tomorrow. What would you do in your last 24 hours?"

"Spend it with you, of course." Dan presses his lips on Phil's neck. "And our friends. I'd want to die looking at the faces of the people that I love."

"What happened to dying fast and painless?"

"That was what I preferred. We don't have a choice in how we die, unless we do it using our bare hands."

Phil's hand winds around Dan's waist. "If Martyn saw us now, he'd be happy. I wish he knew I did find love."

"I bet he does." Dan points at the sky. "He's watching us from above. I'm sure he knows how much I love you."

"Are you saying you love me?"

"Isn't it obvious?"

"Dan." He turns his head and looks at Dan with a serious expression. "Is this your way of telling me 'I love you?'"

Dan hesitates for a couple of seconds, then nods. "I think I loved you the moment you said you were a Muse fan."

He laughs. "I knew I wasn't crazy when we were staring at each other when we were at lunch."

"Really? I thought I was the only one!"

He brings himself closer to Dan, his lips centimeters away from Dan's mouth. "I love you. I don't care if we've only been dating for a couple of weeks so far. I know in my heart that I belong to you. And I promise you, whatever kind of hell we'll face when we tell everyone we're together, I won't let you go for a second."

Dan nods. "If this is what love feels like, I'll stay in that hell with you."

Their lips collide. The kiss is slow and sweet, a stark contrast to their conversation about death not too long ago. He's in love. Irrevocably and unconditionally in love with Dan Howell, a boy that he thanks fate for bringing into his ordinary life.

* * *

~:~

* * *

That night, Johnathan and Susan are locked in a hushed, heated discussion about Johnathan's choice to move out. Their two remaining kids are in bed. With the loss of their oldest son, they've been cautious about keeping their arguments down to a minimum.

Fingers are pointed. Threats are in the open. Like every argument made since they met, they are relentless at making their opinions heard by the other. There's no such thing as a compromise in this discussion. Their marriage is in shambles. If they want to salvage what they have, distance could be what they need for their family to stay intact.

 ** _"Even if there was no Tabitha, I still wouldn't agree."_**

 _ **"I'm not surprised. You were always the one that makes sure you get what you want."**_

 _ **"Are you calling me selfish?"**_

 _ **"Well, you only think for yourself most of the time."**_

 ** _"John, I'm telling you. If you move out, you're going to regret it."_**

 _ **"I'll regret nothing. Susan, let go of your pride. The only reason you're saying no is because you're too stubborn to say that I'm right. Admit it. You know you'd rather have this marriage stay alive without me loving you than divorcing and never having to see me again. "**_

 _ **"It's not a dream, John. I know you love me!"**_

"No I don't! Listen to me. I didn't have to marry you to be a father for our kids. I was forced to tie the knot by our parents. Now look at us. Look at what happened to Martyn. Being together is doing more harm than good to our kids."

The argument ends with a certain line that has Susan resigned to agree to Johnathan's choice. It's a statement that haunts her thoughts until she falls asleep for the night. _"If you won't do this for me, do it for Martyn. He wants our family to be okay. Divorce doesn't have to be our only escape route."_

* * *

~:~

* * *

The next day, the Lester family gathers around in the living room following an awkward family dinner. The twins could tell that something has been on their parents' minds since Martyn's deaths. A part of them believed that they took Martyn's last words literally and are getting a divorce, though Phil told Fiona that a divorce wouldn't happen unless their parents discussed the idea with them first.

"This should have been done a long time ago, so I hope you'll listen to me when I tell you this." Johnathan glances at Susan, who looks at him for a moment before averting her gaze.

"You're getting a divorce," Fiona says bluntly. "I know. I saw this coming."

Phil raises an eyebrow at her. "What the hell?" he mouths. She responds to him with a shrug.

Johnathan blinks. "Ummm… no. I don't think a divorce after Martyn's passing is appropriate at this time. I meant to say that I'm planning to move out."

Phil sits back on the couch. This is not what he expected to hear. On one hand, their parents haven't decided on divorce and it means that he and Fiona won't be separated. On the other hand, having their father move out is just as big a change as divorce. In fact, Johnathan's choice may as well lead into divorce someday. This could be the universe's intervention before the inevitable change that can't be reversed once it's done.

"I'm cool with it," Fiona reacts. "Dad, I think that being away might do well with your relationship with mom. You love us. You're doing something most fathers wouldn't do in a situation like ours. They'd resort to divorce. But you? Instead of ending everything, you're trying to fix it." She smiles. "I love you, dad, and I love the effort you're doing for our family."

Phil stares at her disbelief in awe. She took the words right out my mouth.

"Alright…" Johnathan looks at Phil. "Do you agree with Fiona?"

 _We're twins dad. We agree on pretty much anything._ "I second what she said."

Johnathan grins. "Great. I'm searching for an apartment close to work, so you two can see me whenever you can."

Phil glances at Susan. She has her lips pursed.

"We'll take good care of you, mom," he tells her, standing up to hug Susan.

She sighs. "I know, son."

This is a new change in their lives. For Phil, he thinks that this is hope for the outlook of a better love between his parents, for the possibility of their family to finally be normal.

* * *

~:~

* * *

The Sunday before school is back in session, Johnathan and Tabitha are sitting on a table at a corner of a café. She sips at her latte, in remorse about what she had done to the man that she's having coffee with. He called her after work yesterday and asked her if she had time the next day if they could meet up. They haven't seen each other since their talk at the park. At first, she thought that he followed her advice and he's here to tell her that his wife is beginning to change for the better. Instead, he shows her a picture of an apartment that he's planning to check out sometime during the week.

"I didn't know you had it in you," she murmurs. "So you're going through with it?"

"Absolutely." he puts his phone back in his pocket. "In a few weeks, you'll be looking at a Mr. Lester that can do whatever he wants."

She smiles. "Congrats." She holds her plastic cup in the air. "To new beginnings."

"To new beginnings." He taps his plastic cup of cappuccino with hers. _He did it. He's trying to love his monster wife. But what about me? Simon isn't back yet. What if he's gone for good? No… he'll be back. He promised Dan and Adrian. He wouldn't leave the boys hanging like that._

"Let's talk about us." His gentle gaze stirs the familiar tingle that she has whenever she's with him. "I know Simon isn't back yet and I don't want to take advantage of you while he's gone. But I have to ask: what do you plan to do if he possibly left you for good?"

She sighs. "I don't know. I've tried calling him, but he isn't picking up." _He's doing exactly what he did in his note._ "I'm sure he's going to come back. If he doesn't…" She frowns. What will she do if her husband will never come back? She won't be able to fix their marriage. She'll be a single mother raising two sons with a career that doesn't make too much money. She, Dan, and Adrian would have to move again, and their first move was hard enough on them.

"Tabitha." He reaches across the table to rest his hands on top of her. "I have no business with what you'll do with your relationship with Simon, but it shouldn't be a reason for our relationship to be gone. You don't have to make any more sacrifices. We can be friends. Once I move out, Susan won't be able to control me. I would rather have you in my life as my friend than for you to merely be an ex-mistress."

She bends her head down to look at their hands. How can she say no to him again? She can't deny their chemistry. They've made the damage to their spouses and offspring, yet they've done as much wrong to their relationship when they broke it off. It was difficult to say goodbye to him then. All he's asking for is friendship, not to resume their relationship. The world can't punish them for wanting to be friends, even after their time together as something more than that. There's nothing wrong for a man and a woman to be a confidant to each other.

"Friends it is." She tangles their fingers together. "I guess our relationship can have a new beginning too."

* * *

 ***grins* I was planning to save the "I love you's" later in the fic, but their conversation led me in that direction, so I just went along with it. Sorry if it seemed a bit too mushy. Whenever teleseryes do ILY's, the characters always do it in a mushy but deep and sentimental way, which I was trying to go for.**

 **~ AA**


	14. Trails and an Extra Hiker

Chapter 14: Trails and an Extra Hiker

Haiku

 _When nature brings in love_

 _Do your part to watch it through_

 _As a bystander_

* * *

A woman with long chestnut hair and blue eyes enters the office of a law firm. After greeting a few of her co-workers, she heads into her work area. Minutes later, the elevator doors opens, revealing a man with dark brown hair and brown eyes. When he spots the chestnut-haired woman, he sends a wink in her direction. She responds with a little wave.

Stephanie Milton is Simon Howell's personal assistant. Simon had taken the place of her former boss after he retired last summer. From the moment Simon entered the office, she was mystified by the tall man. Every woman in the office, single or married, and their flamboyantly gay office mate Wesley, weren't immune to Simon's charming appearance.

Stephanie has the worst kind of luck when it comes to love. Her first crush was her childhood friend who later turned out to be gay. Her high school boyfriend cheated on her during the college years. Her ex-fiancé left her at the altar for his high school sweetheart (she has nothing against Frank since she knew that he still harbored feelings for Lesley while they were together). The blind date that one of her co-workers set her up with a few months ago stood her up. At 40, she resigned to the idea that she's meant to remain unmarried for the rest of her life.

No one knows about her attraction toward Simon. There's nothing with using Mr. Howell as her personal eye candy. When it comes to men, she has a philosophy: you can look, but you can't touch. Her workdays are tolerable as long as she gets to see Mr. Howell. She was slightly disappointed when she learned that he had a wife, although what 40-something man with his looks be single? She's lucky to be around him most days of the week, luckier when they make accidental physical contact.

Her world was turned upside down two days before Valentine's Day. She can't forget how he had looked when he showed up at the office looking as if he witnessed someone dying. He didn't ask her to bring him his usual morning coffee, which made her think that something happened to him last night or on the way to work. It wasn't until after hours when the office was empty that he told her everything. The fact that he became a victim of cheating surprised her. The fact that the person that his wife cheated on someone that happened to also be married surprised her further; at least she and her high school boyfriend didn't have a ring on their fingers.

She empathized for him. She gave her body to him in an effort to comfort him. She allowed him to stay in her apartment for the last few weeks. She's trying to put him back together, one step at a time. She's doing this for him as a friend, but her actions are leading her to develop emotions that she shouldn't be having for her boss.

She's falling in love with Simon, and he's in danger to be the next male on her list of unfortunate exes.

* * *

~:~

* * *

They are sprawled on a grassy field at a park. The two boys are wearing hoodies over their pajamas, gazing up at the moon and pointing at star constellations.

"Will we always be like this?" Phil asks.

Dan squeezes Phil's hand. "Maybe not always, but at least we'll _always_ have each other."

"You think so?"

"I know so."

Underneath a blanket of the night sky, their lips meet, the two young men believing that their dream for always can last forever.

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's Wednesday night of the first week back in school. Next weekend is the funeral of a beloved brother. In a bedroom of the Lester residence, Fiona is looking out her window, looking out into the neighborhood. A lot has happened to her in the past three months. If this much can happen in three months, what else can happen by the middle of the year? She can't handle any more affairs or deaths.

A person wearing a hoodie jogs by. _Who jogs at 11 PM? I swear, if he gets murdered, can he at least get murdered in a different neighborhood?_ However, when the person in the hoodie jogs toward the house, she's startled when she distinguishes the facial features as Phil. _Phil? When did he go out?_ She hides behind the curtains. She watches as Phil scales up the tree in front of their house, opens the window to his room, and leaps inside.

She's confused. _Where did he go this late at night? Why didn't he have to sneak out? Susan and Johnathan would never allow them to go out after curfew. Did he go to a party? Is he an alcoholic? What if he's a drug dealer?_ The onslaught of questions that fills her mind confuses her further. _Is this the first time that he's done this? Oh god, what if he's in a gang? My bro can't be in a gang!_

She moves away from the window and heads to his room. Once she gets an answer from him, she can stop her worrying.

Without knocking, she opens the door to his room. He's on his bed, his duvet covering his body, reading his ragged classroom copy of Macbeth. "Oh hey Fi. What's up?"

"Hey… I just saw you come in through your window. Where'd you go?"

It's his turn to be confused. "I didn't go anywhere. I was here reading this." He holds up the book up in the air.

 _He's lying._ "Are you sure? I saw someone running outside and it looked like you."

"Ah." He shakes his head. "Wasn't me. Probably a lookalike. I'm not the only guy with this handsome face."

She chuckles, rolling her eyes. "Very funny, Phil."

He smiles. "You're probably tired and just seeing things."

As if on cue, she lets out a yawn. She rubs her eyes. Phil's a terrible liar. _Maybe he's right. I've been up late for the last few nights studying for Friday's physics exam._ "Yeah… I guess I'll go to bed. You should too."

"Okay. I'll finish these next two pages."

 _I'm still on to you._ "Night, bro."

"Night sis."

She heads back to her room. She closes her window and gets into bed. He acted like his normal self. Perhaps all her late-night studying is starting to take a toll on her.

 _Don't accuse Phil of such things._ she scolds herself. _Phil wouldn't hurt a butterfly. He's too good to do something that can put himself in danger._

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's Saturday morning at the Suggs residence. Today is the Suggs' monthly family bonding. It's the one weekend on each month where Eliza and her husband Bob close down their store to spend time with their kids. This time, Joe got to choose their destination, who decided on a hiking trip. Moreover, he was granted permission from his parents to bring in an extra person for the hike. He could have brought all of his friends along, though he only required one of them for his special plan for the day.

After helping Alfie steal the notebook for Zoe on Valentine's Day, Joe has been devising a plan to get his sister to fall in love with his best friend. Their lives have come to a point where the friends are desperate for Zalfie to become a reality. Phil is usually the expert when it comes to master plans, but Joe thinks that love may be something that's out of the raven-haired boy's comfort zone.

Zoe is his sister. He knows her the most. He put himself in Phil's scheming mindset. He figured out that the best way for romance to bloom between them is to bring out the moments. The more moments a ship has, the more likely that the ship will be canon. Zalfie is a real love-hate pair. His inference is that if he can get them alone in an environment aside from school or home, then the moments will come more quickly and naturally.

"JOE! LADY LOVE!" Alfie waves at Zoe and Joe from across the street. He's wearing a pair of sunglasses, a white cap, and a large backpack is draped over his shoulders.

"Uh…" Zoe raises an eyebrow at Joe. "Why is _he_ here?"

Eliza smiles. "Joe didn't tell you? He wanted to bring a friend."

"And that friend is me!" Alfie runs across the street and joins the two siblings. "Hiking isn't my thing, but since lady love will be here, I'm all packed and ready to go."

"Right." Zoe glances at Joe, her expression looking as if she wants to kill the boys. _Kill me if you want. You'll thank me in the end._ "You couldn't have asked PJ? Or Dan? I thought Dan liked to hike. He would've been more fitting to tag along."

Alfie pouts. "You don't want me here? What a shame. I was looking forward to spending time with two of my best friends in the world."

"Sure," Zoe says sarcastically. "I bet if I wasn't coming, you would've changed your mind."

"Nope." He puts his cards over the siblings' shoulders, pulling them close to his side. "I'd still have just as much fun if Joe was the only one here."

"We are a formula for fun," Joe agrees. _It will be more fun once my plan begins._

"Whatever." Zoe steps away from Alfie's side. "Just keep your hands to yourself."

Alfie smirks. "I can't promise you that."

"Dick," she mutters.

Watching the exchange, Joe chuckles. _If my plan works, he's gonna have his hands all over you._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Meanwhile, at the Lester household, it's 8 AM and Phil is packing up for his own hiking trip. He unplugs his phone from his charger. He checks his backpack, making sure that he has everything inside. He checks his reflection using the camera feature of his phone. Satisfied with his appearance, he shoves his phone into the pocket of his cargo shorts. His parents are at work and Fiona is spending the day with their remaining friends that aren't going on the Suggs hiking trip, so he doesn't have to make any white lies today. With his sister still asleep, he's hoping to leave the house before she wakes up.

Slinging his backpack over his shoulder, he leaves his room and runs downstairs. There's always an extra excitement when he's going to the log cabin. The last time they went to the cabin, he and Dan told each other "I love you" for the first time. The privacy of the log cabin allows them to have no inhibitions around one another. In the forest, they have all the time in the world to do the things they want that can't be done at most places yet.

Dan is waiting for Phil outside with his own backpack over his shoulders and a cooler in one hand. "Hi angel bean."

Phil laughs. "Angel bean? I think that pet name is worse than princess."

Dan kisses him briefly on the lips. "I've already tried honey, sweetheart, and babe. I thought angel bean would be the one."

"Well it's not, Hobbit Hair." In an effort to be a normal teenage couple, the boys have tried to come up with a homogenous pet name for each other. As a manly couple, they wanted to stay away from the typical relationship pet names. For Dan, they agreed on Hobbit Hair (a reference to Dan's natural unruly hair until he uses his hair straighteners), which Dan told Phil sounds ridiculous, though Phil knows that Dan secretly likes the name. As for Phil, they haven't found a good name yet. _Who would've thought coming up with pet names is harder than a ship name?_

Dan groans. "I still loathe that name by the way."

Phil shakes his head mockingly, holding Dan's hand. _This is gonna be another great day._ "Whatever you say, Hobbit Hair." _We're gonna find a perfect nickname for me someday. If I'm lucky, maybe we'll come up with one today._

* * *

~:~

* * *

An hour into their hiking trip, Zoe hasn't gotten rid of her annoyance over her unconventional hiking partner. Joe is several feet ahead with her parents, so she's left with Alfie, who's dripping with sweat and belting out to the chorus of Bruno Mars' Just the Way You Are.

"When I see your face, there's nothing there that I would change…" _Will he just shut up!_ "'Cause you're amazing… JUST THE WAY YOU ARE!"

She crosses her arms. "Will you stop singing? You're so loud that the whole world can hear you."

He grins. "Then the whole world can hear just how amazing my beautiful Zoe is inside and out."

"Alfs, I already know I'm beautiful. The entire population of the earth doesn't need to know that." _So what if he thinks I'm beautiful all around. If I was fat and had loads of acne on my face, he'd take those words back._

"Why not? You're so beautiful, you can be the next Miss Universe."

She scoffs. "And why would I want to be the next Miss Universe? Who wants to walk around in platinum heels and brag about their bikini bod?"

"Awww… lady love. You're hotter than all the Miss Universe ladies combined."

"Why's that?"

"Because you're real." He smiles. "You'd crush the competition with your art skills in the talent portion."

Her stomach does flip-flops. His compliments are drawing out peculiar emotions from her. _Wait… this isn't the first time I felt like this. The first time was when I rode his motorcycle. But I'm not having an adrenaline rush._

"Love?" He claps his hands in front of her face. "What's wrong? Do you have a headache? Stomachache? Are you feeling sick? Hold on, let me call your parents."

"No," she mumbles. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure? You're looking pale."

"You want pale? Ask a vampire that question."

He grins. "And she's back."

She shakes her head, relieved to have her usual friendly annoyance toward Alfie again. _What was that about? Man, this is why family bondings are supposed to be with people within the family._ "Keep walking, dude. I'd rather conquer this hike than be an international beauty queen."

* * *

~:~

* * *

At another forest miles away, Fiona is tiptoeing along the grassy path feet several meters behind Dan and Phil. Sweat drips from the side of her head, and she's relieved that she made a last-minute choice to bring a bottle of water with her. Every step of the way, she's growing more confused over what the boys were planning to do. They hadn't told her that they were going out today. _They're hiding something from me. I gotta find out what it is._

When she had woken up and looked outside her window, she saw Phil and Dan together, dressed as if they are going to join the Suggs' hike. She was perplexed when she texted Zoe to ask if the two boys joined them on the trip, only to learn that Alfie was the only non-Sugg with her. If Phil was going on his own hike with Dan, he could have told her. She would have definitely wanted to come.

"Where are you two going?" she whispers. _There better be a meadow at the end of this trail._

There isn't a meadow at the end of the path. Instead, she's greeted by the sight of a run-down cabin. _Since when was there a cabin here?_ She watches as Dan and Phil open the cabin's front door, then walk inside. She waits for a few minutes, then walks quietly toward the cabin, ducking behind a tree that allows her to see what's happening indoors through the torn slats of a window.

 _Why didn't Phil tell me about this?_ She and Phil don't keep secrets from each other. He must've meant to tell me about the cabin… but why did he bring Dan? Why not me? Her and Phil's birthday have already passed (with the tension between their families, it was the first time that they didn't celebrate their birthdays), so the cabin wouldn't be used for a surprise birthday party. Dan's birthday is in three months, though it would be strange for Phil to show the cabin to the cabin in advance. In fact, Phil isn't the biggest fan of exercise, much less going on hikes.

Phil's a couch potato, so it has to be Dan that found the cabin. _That would make more sense._ Out of everyone in the group, Phil is the one closest to Dan. The two have been tight at the hip since the first day of school. Dan has also mentioned that he goes on solitary hikes on occasions. He must have stumbled upon the cabin during one of those hikes.

 ** _"I have a surprise for you."_**

 _ **"My birthday was two months ago, Dan."**_

 _ **"I know. But trust me, you're gonna like it."**_

He is We's All About Us plays through Dan's phone. She smiles, remembering the night of the Halloween dance. That was a magical night. She had felt Cinderella dancing with her Prince Charming. Dan's arms around her waist, her blue eyes staring into the depths of his brown eyes, the overwhelming love bursting through her chest… the memories elicits a soft giggle from her.

 _ **"Why are you playing this song?"**_

 _ **"I wanted to dance with you that night. Then you pushed me and your sister together and I couldn't say no."**_

 _ **"I didn't know you liked me then."**_

 _ **"It's alright. That's why I want a do-over. Sorry this isn't the perfect dance floor."**_

 _ **"Don't apologize. We don't need a spotlight or a DJ to have a perfect slow dance."**_

The smile fades away from her face. Phil wraps his arms around Dan's neck and Dan's hands rest on Phil's waist. She watches as the two rock slowly back and forth. Her jaw stiffens, and her legs give out. She can't believe what she's seeing.

 _ **"I love you, Philly cheesesteak."**_

 _ **"Philly cheesesteak?"**_

 _ **"Another bad nickname?"**_

 _ **"The cheesesteak part. I'm not a footlong sandwich."**_

 _ **"Sorry."**_

 _ **"Philly sounds great though."**_

 _ **"Then Philly it is."**_

When they share a kiss, her heart shatters. She's struggling to breathe. _How can you do this to me, Phil?_ He promised. He wrote their names on a tree. He swore that love will never tear them apart. Some promises are meant to be broken, but she believed that theirs is unbreakable.

"You are a liar. Just like dad." Tears cascade down her cheeks. Silently sobbing, she runs away, her heartbreak being the music of her own life's soundtrack.

* * *

~:~

* * *

The love between Dan and Phil isn't the only love brewing between two friends. Alfie and the Suggs family have reached the top of a mountain. Alfie, gasping for breath, raises his fists in the air, feeling victorious that he survived the grueling hike.

"Thank fucking god," he pants. "I thought this was never gonna end."

Zoe chuckles. "Don't celebrate yet. We still gotta get back down."

"It's better going down than up!" Joe chimes.

"Dude, that works in sex too," Alfie jokes. _At least that's what I learned from all the porn vids I've watched._

"Says the one that doesn't get any action," Zoe retorts.

"Who needs action when I've got you?"

In good spirits, he goes to sit down on a boulder. He drops his backpack on the ground and rehydrates himself with the water from his hydroflask. Despite his exhaustion, he marvels at the overlooking view of the city. He has forgotten how it's like to see a picturesque scene from atop a mountain instead of a postcard. To enjoy it with one of his best friends and the love of his life makes it even better. This place would surely be a great location to take Zoe on a first date.

As he regains his hydration, he unzips his backpack and takes out a pencil and his sketchbook. His drawing skills may not be as finessed as Zoe's, though he still loves to sketch things that he thinks are worth capturing on paper instead of a photo on his phone. He used to draw mundane things like cartoons, but Zoe said something when they were 13 that impacted his artistic perspective. _"Art is soul. Draw for you and not for others. You can tell by an artwork if the artist wanted to please the people or if he or she left their labor of love."_

He learned to love art because of her. He loves art so much that his frequent subject is the girl standing meters away from him. He turns to one of his recent rough sketches of her. It's Zoe sleeping on her desk on the night that they worked on their comic. No one except Joe is aware that he has a sketchbook dedicated to sketches of her. This is the sketchbook that he brought with him, which also contains a few loose papers of landscape sketches. He planned to draw her with her family as they bask in the scenery at the mountaintop.

"Whatcha drawing?"

He yelps. He shifts his head to the side to find Zoe next to him, peering down at his sketchbook. His face flushes. _Crap! Crap! Crap!_ He immediately closes the book. "Nothing."

"That wasn't nothing." She yanks the book away from his hands, turning to the page that he was on. "Is that me?"

He buries his face in his hands. _This is not how I wanted her to find that._ "Who else would it be?"

"I…" He spreads his fingers open. She flips to the previous pages. She stops at the sketch of the two of them riding on his motorcycle. "Are all these sketches about me?"

"Most of them," he says meekly.

She turns to another page, showing the sketch of her reaction when he gave her the drawing pad on Valentine's Day. "These are nice."

"Thanks," he tells her sheepishly. "They're not as good as yours though."

"Really? I beg to differ. If you posted this on Tumblr, I bet you'd get loads of notes."

"It won't be as much as yours." She has a side Tumblr blog dedicated to her artwork, which garners hundreds of notes per post.

She closes the sketchbook. "Don't count the numbers. As long as you get likes and reblogs, then there are people out there that like your stuff. "

He smiles. "Thanks."

She places the sketchbook on his lap. "Why me though? There are way more prettier girls you can draw."

"Why would I do that? Like what I said earlier, you're the most beautiful girl in the world. Someone like you deserves to be drawn."

"I'm not that special."

"To me you are." _Look into my eyes, lady love. Why can't you see my love for you is more than just infatuation?_

She smiles. "When you're not annoying, I remember why you're one of my close friends. I'm genuinely flattered you admire me that much to want to draw me."

 _Admiration? Love, I more than just admire you._ He holds back from brushing his hand against hers. If Joe and her parents weren't within earshot, he'd use this moment to confess his love to her. If they were alone, he'd shout to the top of his lungs about how much he's in love with Zoe.

He settles for gazing at her face. "Can I draw you now?"

He swears that he sees a hint of a blush appearing on her cheeks. _Nah. It's probably the heat._ "If you weren't one of my friends, that would be such a creepy question."

"Well, I am your friend. So can I?"

She laughs. "Of course, dunderhead. Draw me like one of your French girls."

 _Oh Zoe. You're the only French girl I'll ever need._

* * *

 **Ah. It's been a couple chapters since I last wrote a Zalfie moment. And man oh man Fiona is gonna be quite a handful in the next chap.**

 **Stephanie's name is a reference to the Sims 4 proposal vid (Dilitha is relationship goals). Stephanie Milton was one of the people sitting in the restaurant where Dil and Tabitha went. And btw, I would pay good money to see a man propose wearing what Dil wore in that video lol.**

 **~ AA**


	15. Betrayals and a Confirmation

Chapter 15: Betrayals and a Confirmation

Haiku

 _Eyes for another_

 _The signs that once gave me hope_

 _Made me blindsided_

* * *

The Suggs family bonding is coming to an end. As Alfie and the family descend down the mountain, Joe takes notes of how Zoe is behaving toward Alfie. Her attitude has significantly changed since their time spent at the mountaintop. Unlike the descent up the mountain, her sarcasm has decreased. She also seems a little more nervous, slightly reminding him of Fiona's around crushes. _First phase of Operation Zalfie is a success._

His plan is working. When he invited Alfie to come for the hike, he suggested to his lovesick friend for him to bring his drawing pad of Zoe sketches with him. Joe insisted that the hike can inspire Alfie for another sketch. _"You want to see her all hot and sweaty, right? This is your chance to see that in rated PG action."_ However, Joe had other intentions for the book. He timed it perfectly so that when Alfie brought out his sketchbook, he'd use Zoe's curious tendencies to check out Alfie's sketches. He had watched in glee as Zoe posed for Alfie as he took Joe's suggestion and drew her in his book.

 _ **"So you can keep me, inside the pocket of your ripped jeans."** _ Joe shakes his head in amusement as Alfie, skipping around like a toddler, sings the chorus of Ed Sheeran's Photograph. "Sing with me, lady love!"

"Get Joe to sing."

"I'm not gay!" Joe calls out from behind them. _If I was, I would've stolen Alfie from Zoe a long time ago._ "You know the words, Zoe!"

Zoe groans. "Holding me closer till our eyes meet. You won't ever be alone… wait for me-" Her words are cut off as Alfie scoops her up in his arms and carries her down the path. "ALFIE, YOU NIMWHIT! PUT ME DOWN!"

Joe slaps his hand over his mouth, stifling his laughter. _And so the princess is finally in the arms of her prince._ This wasn't a part of his plan, but he snickers at the sight of the moment unfolding right before his eyes. Joe is unable to contain his laughter with Alfie's next action. Zoe lets out a shriek when Alfie smacks his lips on her cheek. As soon as Alfie's lips disconnect from her cheek and she angles her head slightly to the side, it causes their mouths to be inches away from each other.

Joe stops laughing. He grins like a Cheshire cat. _This is it. THIS IS IT. Kiss! Kiss! Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!_

The two friends are locked in a heated stare for several seconds before Alfie blinks and places Zoe back on her feet. Zoe is gazing at him in a way that Joe has never seen her look at Alfie before. _Holy shit… those are the eyes Louise has when she sees Matt._

Joe clears his throat. Alfie can kill him later for ruining their moment – this shouldn't be the way that they have their first kiss. He'd prefer their first kiss to be when they don't have an audience. "I don't mean to interrupt, but Alfs, where'd you get the balls to do that?"

Alfie looks at Joe sheepishly. "I don't know. It just came over me."

"Were you 'in the moment?'" Joe makes air quotes with his fingers of "in the moment."

Zoe takes a couple of small steps away from Alfie. "Whatever you were thinking, do me a favor and don't do that again."

Alfie smirks. "No promises."

Joe jogs to catch up to them. _Don't fight the love, big sis. One day, you'll be begging on your knees for him to kiss you again._

* * *

~:~

* * *

The next day, Fiona is staring at a tree marked with her and Phil's name. Her hands are in fists at her sides. If it isn't for the people scattered throughout the park, she'd be screaming all of her pent-up anger at the tree. A part of her mind remains unable to accept the reality of her crush in a relationship with her brother.

A few months ago, she couldn't bear the thought of Dan being with another girl. After Hannah's behavior around Dan on the first week of school, she couldn't risk letting another self-absorbed girl lay their hands on him. Whenever she sees him talk to a girl at school, she feels like a jealous girlfriend. If the girl was shamelessly flirting with him, she'd step in and drag him away from the conversation. Most times, he's relieved of her selfless rescues, though there were a couple of occasions when she mistook harmless friendliness for flirts. In other words, she would see any girl as a threat to her chances to being with Dan.

She never saw this coming. All the signs that she assumed were leading her to a fairytale romance with Dan was false. When she looks back at those moments, she realizes that Phil is involved in every occurrence. He's there when Dan comes over to their house. He's there when she eats dinner at the Howells. He's there when Dan goes to Leroy's. He was a bystander when she danced with Dan at the Halloween dance. He stood next to her during their group shopping trip when she admired the Bath and Body Works gift set that Dan bought as her Christmas present.

She was misled by the signs. Dan was never interested in her. He was interested in Phil. She just so happened to be a presence every time. She can't even look at her Bath and Body Works gift set anymore without attaching the memory to Phil. After all, Dan had only bought it for her because she's his friend. She's nothing special to him. The person that's special to Dan is Phil.

 _"Let's promise that we'll never let love come between us."_ She growls, punching the tree as hard as she can. She repeats the action with her other fist. She treats the tree bark as a punching bag, her knuckles reddening through every punch. Cuts start to appear, drops of blood smearing the bark.

She'd rather see Dan with a prostitute than with Phil. Any girl (or boy) is a better match than her brother. Why didn't Dan tell them that he was bi? Had she known, she would have paid more attention to the interactions between Dan and Phil. She feels humiliated. Her feelings have once again backfired, only this time the person that she lost her crush against is someone related to her by blood.

"How will mom and dad feel about this?" she murmurs. They'd both be surprised, but Johnathan would be more accepting than Susan. Susan grew up in a very conservative family. She knows that Susan's narrow-minded perceptions makes her wary of homosexuals. If Fiona's mother knew that her son is gay, there's a chance that she'd disown Phil. She may be mad at her brother, but she doesn't want to see him thrown out on the streets.

With aching knuckles, she weakly punches the tree one more time. Her worry about the image of Phil homeless is overshadowed by the memory of him and Dan kissing in the cabin. She doesn't care if the two are in love. Phil was the first one that she told about her crush on Dan. She relied on the boys' friendship to get closer to Dan. For years, she protected her heart, and when she finally let her guard down, the one that she trusted the most became the biggest backstabber in her life.

The worst part? His betrayal hurts her more than Johnathan and Susan's affair.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Meanwhile, at the Howell residence, five boys are in a Dan's bedroom, talking about the Suggs family bonding the previous day. Joe is retelling the story about their downhill trek, causing Alfie to throw a pillow at him.

"So wait… Alfie actually _kissed_ Zoe?" PJ asks, grinning at Alfie.

"On the cheek," Alfie clarifies. "But I wish I kissed her on the lips."

"So why didn't you?" Dan questions curiously. "A little peck wouldn't have hurt."

"On the contrary, a little peck can turn into a big peck," PJ rebuttals, recalling his summer camp kiss with Christy.

Phil nods. "Because once you initiate a kiss, you won't stop till you're gasping for air."

Alfie sighs. "Do you think I went a little too far? She told me not to do it again. Do you think it means I have no chance to be with her?"

"Hell no!" PJ disagrees. _This is the Alfs' first bold move on Zoe! Why give up on his advances when he's getting closer to winning her heart?_ "That should be more of a reason why you should already tell her you love her."

Joe raises his hand in agreement. "I second that. All in favor of Alfie confessing to Zoe during junior prom, say 'ay.'"

"Ay," Phil, Dan, and PJ reply in unison.

"I don't wanna," Alfie whines. "Give me till the end of the year."

"Too long," PJ immediately counters. "That'll only give you six months to date and there's no guarantees you two will be going to the same college."

"November?" Alfie meekly compromises.

 _Now you're just pulling my strings, buddy._ "By prom night. Take it or leave it."

"That's a few weeks away!" Alfie exclaims.

"Do you want to be with Zoe?"

"Since I was eight."

"Prom night it is." Once Zoe finds out how he feels about her, she'll start thinking about her own feelings for him. She's too hard-headed to think about love unless someone presents the opportunity in front of her face.

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's 4:53 PM on a Tuesday afternoon at Leroy's. Fiona is assisting a customer while Phil is running the cashier. Their boss is in the backroom, taking care of the merchandise that was shipped over from yesterday.

Phil grins when Dan enters the video game store. He restrains himself from running over to Dan and greeting him with a hug. Fiona turns to the door and gives Dan a smile, but there's something about her smile that concerns Phil. The smile seems forced, as if she's doing it because it's routine rather than because she's happy to see him. Since Saturday, Phil has noticed a change in behavior from his sister. She isn't as talkative to Dan like she usually is and she doesn't blush whenever he stands close to her. Phil can tell that something is bothering her, though he can't determine what it is.

Dan waves at Fiona. "Hey."

Fiona gives a polite smile to her customer. "Excuse me." She glances at Dan. "I'm busy."

"Sorry." He gestures to the shelf of Xbox games. "Have any of your usual recs for me?"

"Not today," she answers briskly. "Go ask Phil. I'm not the only expert here."

"O…kay. " Dan walks away from her and approaches Phil. _That was weird. I wonder if one of the cheerleaders pissed her off. "She's still like that? Philly, did she fight with Zoe or Louise?"_

Phil shrugs. "I don't know. Could be. She's been like that since last weekend."

"Did you try talking to her?"

"She told me she was fine."

"I don't think she is." Dan leans back on the counter. "What gets a girl all moody?"

Phil taps his chin. "Periods. Hormones. Boys. Or if you're Fiona, getting called a noob online."

Dan chuckles. "Girls are hard to get."

Phil lowers his voice down. "Which is why I'm glad that we don't have to deal with it."

"But we do deal with boners," Dan jokes, eliciting a laugh from Phil.

"Hey, boners are just as bad as periods." Phil glances down at Dan's pants. "Don't tell me that tent you got there happened out of the blue."

"This 'tent' is all because of you."

Phil slaps Dan playfully on the shoulders. "Save that kind of talk after work. We got customers."

His downcast eyes looks back up. He switches his gaze to Fiona, who's watching their entire exchange. She's frowning, and when she finds Phil looking at her, she quickly looks away, resuming her aid to the customer.

What is going on with Fi? "Dan, I have to grab something in the backroom. Can you man the cashiers in case a customer has to pay up?"

"Sure thing." Dan gives him a smile. "By the way, tell Fiona I'm sorry if I did anything to upset her."

 _Why would she be upset at you? You're the one that makes her happy all the time._ "Alright."

Leaving Dan at the checkout, he retreats to the backroom. Martyn's funeral is in a few days. Saturday will be a day of tears. He doesn't want his sister to have another weight to carry on a day that should have happened decades into the future.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Three days before Martyn's funeral, Fiona, Ian, and Anthony are hanging out at Lilly's. They are sitting next to a window, eating their ice cream. Despite the two boys never meeting her older brother, she still wanted them at the funeral. They accepted the invitation, as it was also Fiona's way to officially introduce the duo to her friends. She called them the other day to tell them that she needed their opinion on something important, hence the reason why they are at an ice cream shop on a day where she's ditching a Key Club meeting to come talk to them.

"So what's up?" Ian starts. _Last time Fiona said she had something important to talk about, she dropped a bomb by telling us her dad is cheating on her mom with her friend's mom._ "Do you have another cheating tale for Ant and I?"

"Ian," Anthony scolds. He glances at her apologetically. "Carry on."

Fiona sighs. "No Ian. You're not too far off."

 _What? Really? I was kidding._ "So who cheated?"

She hesitates. "It's not who cheated. It's who's the backstabber."

"Backstabber?" Anthony looks at her curiously. "What happened?"

She licks at the vanilla ice cream of her triple scoop cone before responding. "Dan and Phil. They happened."

Huh? "What did they do to you?"

"They're dating," she spats. "I followed them to some cabin last weekend. They were kissing and dancing to a song Dan and I danced to once." She grimaces. "They didn't even have the decency to tell us they're in a relationship. Even if I didn't have a crush on Dan, I would've appreciated it if they told it to my face that they're going out. But no. They're lying to me, to my friends, to my parents. They're so happy while I'm still mourning for my brother and wondering what Dan sees in Phil."

Ian remains quiet. He has never seen her in this state of aggravation before. He has seen her in gloomy moods, but never angry. He also knows that she has a deep bond for her twin brother. He doesn't blame her for acting this way. He too would be peeved if he saw his crush dating someone close to him.

"I'm… sorry?" Anthony comments.

"Sorry?" she deadpans. "My crush is going out with my brother and all you can say is 'sorry?'"

Anthony looks at her sheepishly. "I don't really know what to say, Fiona."

"Hmmm… how about a 'my brother is a dick?'"

Wow. This is truly a side of Fiona that Ian has never seen before. "I wouldn't say a dick. Is it wrong? Yes. He's your brother though. He probably has a good reason why he didn't tell you about it."

"He has a reason, but I bet it's not a good one."

"You won't know until he tells you."

"Whatever." She leans back on her seat. "You two are no help."

"Sorry," Anthony apologizes again.

"Will you stop saying sorry?" she snaps.

"Hey, don't be rude to Ant," Ian defends. "We don't even know why you're telling us this instead of your friends. Don't you think they could give you a better opinion instead of two college dudes you've known for a few months?"

She glares at them. "How can I tell my friends when they'll most likely side with Phil? They'll think that I'm acting like some crazed possessive chick who can't accept her crush is taken."

"We don't think that," Anthony tries to assure her.

"Yeah," Ian agrees. "With all your family problems, we get why you're reacting like this."

She gives them a small smile. "Thanks. Truth is, I'm telling you two this because I trust you guys just as much as my best friends. Since you don't know Dan and Phil personally, you're unbiased. It's easier for me to ask for advice from you guys. You put up with my problems without expecting anything in return."

 _Why would we expect a reward? You're better than the sorority girls our friends go after._ "It's what friends do."

"Your life is interesting compared to ours," Anthony adds. "Listen. Whatever happens between you and Phil, we'll always be here for you."

Ian glances at his best friend's eyes. The way that Anthony is staring at Fiona is how he'd look at Pamela behind her back. Glancing at Fiona, the emotions are unfortunately not reflected by her blue eyes. He feels sorry for Anthony. He doesn't have to ask Anthony the question. He has already figured it out.

He can see that Anthony is falling for Fiona.

* * *

~:~

* * *

On midday of a Saturday, a small of crowd of people are gathered outside a church. A coffin is being carried to a sleek white car, about to be driven to the graveyard where the body will be buried. There are dried tears on faces of family members of the deceased boy. Even the friends have shed a couple of tears, especially during Phil and Fiona's eulogy to Martyn.

Sandwiched between Louise and PJ, Dan watches Phil with a saddened expression. He recalls a portion of their conversation at the cabin a few days after Martyn's death. _"Everyone dies, which is why we should live each day as if it were our last."_ What if it was Phil lying in that coffin? He'd be crying harder than he did when his grandmother died when he was 10-years-old. Every human life is precious, just like his relationship with Phil. He shakes off an image of witnessing Phil taking his final breaths. Someday, he may have to watch Phil leave the earth (if he doesn't die first). All he can hope is for that day to be several decades from today.

Louise sniffs. "Anyone got a tissue?"

"Dan took them all," Alfie jokes.

Dan laughs softly. _Leave it to Alfie to attempt to lighten the mood._ "Let's save the tears when we're at the cemetery."

The twins wave at the group, then boards the car along with their parents. Phil lingers his gaze on Dan and gives him a little smile. Fiona glances at Phil and frowns, following behind him. _Huh. Wonder what that's about._

Dan and the rest of the friends pile in the Suggs' car, which Zoe borrowed from her parents. As Zoe drives the friends to the cemetery, the car is filled with casual conversation between Louise, PJ, Alfie, and the Suggs. Dan stays silent, getting lost in his thoughts. Something about Fiona's frown has him feeling uncomfortable. She looked at Phil as if she knew their secret. _She can't, right? Aside from stolen looks, we didn't give anything away._

She's a smart girl. What if she did figure it out? What if she endeavors to break them up? You can't judge a book by its cover. An intelligent female like Fiona can be cunning and sly in disguise.

He swallows nervously. He's not going to lose Phil. He can't lose the best thing that has ever happened to him.

"Dan?" He blinks. Louise's hand is on his shoulder. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." He forces a smile on his face. "Just thinking about the burial."

"Me too. Don't think too hard. It'll be over before you know it."

His paranoia follows him for the next hour. He consistently looks at Fiona, analyzing her facial expressions to deduce whether or not she suspects that he's dating Phil. Every time she looks his way, he switches his gaze elsewhere. If she catches him, she could misinterpret his looks as endearment should she be oblivious to his relationship with Phil. What's more difficult is limiting his sneaky looks at Phil. She caught them once. A second time could confirm her possible suspicions.

Once the burial is over, the family and guests are invited to eat lunch at a small building atop a hill. Phil makes his way over to Dan, while Fiona talks to the two college boys that she invited to the funeral as her plus two. She introduced the pair to the friends before the funeral proceedings began. Though the two boys are older than the group, Dan thinks that their easygoing natures will make it easier for him to befriend them once today's event is over.

"Ready to go?" Phil asks Dan.

Dan nods. "I'm starving."

"Me too… and not just for the food."

Dan chuckles. "You would make the perfect dessert."

"What kind of dessert would I be?"

 _Anything that's sweet._ "Cupcakes."

"Why cupcakes?"

"I don't know… but I love cupcakes."

Phil grins. "You should bake me some."

 _I'll bake you anything you want._ "When I have time."

"Dan? Phil?" The boys find Fiona walking toward them.

"What's up, sis?" Phil questions her.

"Can I talk to you both? In private?"

Dan's heartbeat stutters. _She knows. Fuck, she knows._ "Now?"

"Uh… duh," she replies. "Follow me."

They follow the guests up the hill, stopping at a secluded area not too far from the building where lunch is served. Dan's agitation has him wanting to flee. _Why are we talking now? Can't it wait till later?_ He doesn't have an excuse ready for her. He's terrible at forging lies right on the spot. He needs time to come up with believable lies that will get Fiona off their backs.

She crosses her arms, her narrowed eyes piercing more guilt into him. _Calm down, Dan. You don't know what she's gonna say. Stop looking like you've committed a crime._

"You are so transparent."

His heart skips a beat. "What?"

She scoffs. "Did you think I wouldn't find out?"

"Find out what?" he says in what he hopes is an indifferent tone.

"You. And Phil."

He recognizes the immediate rigidity of Phil's body. Unlike Dan, Phil is unable to mask the panic on his face. "What about me and Dan?"

"Don't play dumb with me." She takes a step toward Dan. "I know you and Phil are in a relationship."

He gulps. This is the conversation that he feared having with her. Regardless of the time or place, she'll be furious once she learns the truth about him and Phil. "What makes you think that?"

"Oh, I don't know… I saw you two in a cabin dancing to the same song we danced to on Halloween, tell each other 'I love you,' and kiss before my eyes."

"You saw us?" Phil says in shock. "Wait, how did you know where the cabin is?"

She uncrosses her arms. "So you two are dating?"

"Answer my question first."

"I asked a question first. "

"I'll answer it when you answer mine."

"That's not fair."

"Answer it, Fi. Who told you about the cabin?"

She rolls her eyes. "No one did. I followed you two there."

The guilt melts away from Dan's chest and is replaced with fury. "Stalker."

She shifts her gaze toward Dan. "What?"

"Stalker," he tells her in a louder voice. "You couldn't wait until we told you?"

"Dan-" Phil tries to interject.

"Let me talk, Philly." He looks down at Fiona. _Some nerve she had to follow us that day. How did we not see her?_ "Yes. Phil and I are a couple. I found that cabin a while back and that's where we go to spend time away from you and the others. I'm highly offended that you'd invade our privacy like that. With all the shit going on for the last several weeks, we were doing you a favor by not telling you the truth yet. We were waiting until after today so we wouldn't worry you. If you didn't notice, we actually care a great deal about your feelings."

"You _care_?" she hisses. "If you cared, you would've told me."

"If you cared, you would've kept your nose out of our business."

Her next action stuns him. Her response to his words is a slap to his face. The hard contact of her palm leaves a dull ache on his right cheek.

"Sis!" Phil exclaims. "Why'd you do that?"

Tears brim her eyes. "Oh, so now you're taking his side?"

"It's not like that-"

"Save your excuses for someone that'll believe you." Her bottom lip trembles. "Who are you and what happened to my brother?"

"Fi, stop. Let's talk this out."

"Talk. TALK? We're talking right here! You knew I like Dan. Why didn't you back off from him for me?"

"I tried," Phil tells her gently. "Believe me, I tried."

"Well, you should've tried harder," she snaps. "You promised me love won't split us apart. Didn't you think my feelings for Dan can do that?"

 _Okay, time to step in._ "It's not Phil's fault. I confessed to him first."

She momentarily directs her attention to Dan. "Quiet you."

His patience is wearing off. He's not letting Phil handle this on his own. Even though they are responsible for her heartbreak, it doesn't give her a right to put all the blame on Phil. "I won't be quiet. It's not Phil's fault because you can't accept I like him and not you. I apologize for my rudeness, but I've never liked you. I like you as a friend. That's it. You're cool and all, but I don't see you in that way. Phil, on the other hand, means so much to me."

"Dan…" Phil whispers.

Dan smiles, reaching out to hold Phil's hand. "I don't just like him – I'm in love with him. So he's not the one that should back off – that should be you."

His friendship with the twins can't compare to his love for Phil. If it means defending Phil from his own sister, he'll do it. He doesn't like seeing Phil belittled by Fiona. Her hurt shouldn't be a justification to being the damsel in distress in their situation.

"I know you're pissed, but if you have an inkling of respect, don't tell our friends," Phil tells Fiona.

She rolls her eyes. "No promises."

"Fi-"

"You've hurt me enough." She turns her back on them. "If I were you, I'd tell them ASAP. Now that I know your secret, if you dare piss me off again, I'll be the one to let the cat out of the bag." She angles her head to look at the boys, and with a final glare, she walks away from them.

Resentment and exasperation hangs in the air. A breeze caresses Dan's slapped cheek. The two boys stare at each other in morose.

They've just betrayed the one person at one of her lowest times, and they have no clue if she'll ever forgive them.

* * *

 **Face slap number two. I didn't originally plan to add that till I was writing the scene and thought "There's no way I'm letting this confrontation go without someone getting slapped."**

 **1000+ VIEWS. *happy dance* I appreciate knowing you're keeping up with this IPY. Had I not pre-typed the chapters, I would've only been able to do one chapter per week. But for you guys, I love you enough to bring you two long chapters per week.**

 **~ AA**


	16. Faults and a Returning Father

Chapter 16: Faults and a Returning Father

Haiku

 _Once you've been betrayed_

 _Forgiving and forgetting_

 _Doesn't come so easy_

* * *

Simon's eyes are locked on the peach-colored tiled floor of Stephanie's bedroom. It's the first day of April, about one and a half months since he left Tabitha and his sons. Every day that he's away from his family, he feels guilty about his choice. He goes to sleep every night wondering how his family is faring without him. As difficult as the situation is, he stands by his decision. However, the woman that's sitting next to him in her nightgown on her bed is convincing him to do the one thing that he's not ready to do.

"I don't want to go," he says softly, leaning on her shoulder. "I enjoy being with you. My problems don't matter when I'm here."

She brushes her fingers along his hair. "That's what I'm worried about. Just because you're trying to forget your problems doesn't mean it's not there. You have a wife and kids. The last several weeks have been amazing, and I'm not trying to kick you out, but I think it's time for you to go home."

He closes his eyes. She's right. He's overstaying his welcome. She took him in out of the kindness of her heart. She's the reason why he hasn't been alone since he left Tabitha, Dan, and Adrian. It has been a long time since he had the company of a female companion in his age range aside from Tabitha. They formed a strong bond outside of work. Except for the occasional mention of his dilemma, she treats him as a normal friend instead of her boss. Even their co-workers are curious about his more-than-friendly behavior toward her in the office.

He feels like an average human being when he's with her. Their sex life is only a necessity when his loneliness takes over. Despite the circumstances, his feelings toward Stephanie Milton is treading emotionally hazardous territory. He has sinful thoughts about the possibility of spending a life with her. He has made himself quite at home in her apartment and already has surpassed the physical hurdle of their relationship.

 _What kind of relationship do we have?_ There isn't a proper label for what they are. They aren't just merely casual friends-with-benefits. They are more than friends, but not a couple. They are somewhere between that, an unusual relationship status that doesn't solve his problems. And yet, what they have is something that he can't stop. She has become a fixation of his life.

His anxiety of facing his family isn't the only reason why he doesn't want to return home. The chestnut-haired woman is the other reason.

"I want to stay here." He lifts his head from her shoulder, looking into her blue orbs, a color that reminds him so much of Fiona and Phil. "I'm afraid of what I'm coming home to. What if my sons don't think of me as their father anymore? I don't want them to hate me."

"They won't." She places her palms on the side of his face. "They're your own flesh and blood. They'll understand if you talk to them."

"That's what concerns me. You know my marriage will be one of the first things I'll talk to Tabitha about when I go back. What if she wants divorce? If that happens, showing my face there will only mean I'll say goodbye to my sons again."

She sighs. "All the more reason why you should go back. The more you delay your return, the less you'll be seen as a father to your sons. I know this is hard, but you have to get through this. If you mend you and your wife's mistakes now, you can put your problems behind you sooner than later."

His resistance dwindles. It is about time for him to face his fears. It's better for him to return now when almost two months have passed rather than a year. He made a promise, and he intends to keep it.

"Okay." _That empty chair at the dinner table shall be occupied again._ "I'll pack my bags. This weekend, I'm heading home."

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's Saturday night in the Lester household. The Lesters have finished eating dinner a few minutes ago. Susan and Johnathan are watching TV in the living room while the twins are washing the dishes. The awkward silence between the parents makes Johnathan want to retreat, but he's making an effort to be a good husband to Susan before he moves out. He recently made the decision to rent out an apartment a couple of blocks away from the hotel, so he'll be moving out as soon as his landlord gives him the keys to his new home.

Since their family discussion about him moving out, he and Susan have stopped fighting altogether. They speak to each other when it's required, and when it seems like that she wants to argue with him, she drops the subject altogether instead. To him, it's pleasant and saves him from losing his voice.

"Dad?" Phil stands at the side of the couch where Johnathan is.

"Yes?"

"Can we talk?"

"Sure." He turns to Susan. "I'll be in our room if you need me."

She gives him a curt nod, then directs her attention back to the television. He stands up from the sofa and heads upstairs, his son right behind him. Once they are in his room, he closes the door behind him, locking it to make sure no one will bother them.

He leans against the wall next to the door. "What would you like talk about?"

"Well…" Phil looks at him with uncertainty. "Once you move, can I live with you for a while?"

He blinks. "Why do you want to live with me? Don't you want to stay with your mother and your sister?" Despite his constant fights with Susan, the fights had the positive impact of making the twins close with each other. They get along better than most siblings, hence why he didn't file for divorce. He knew that a divorce could potentially affect living arrangements, and he couldn't bear to tear his children apart.

"It's... a personal reason," Phil answers. "Sis and I fought about something, so she's sort of pissed at me. I want to give her some space till she's ready to talk and I thought living with you for a bit could help."

"Are you sure? You might not want to live in a stuffy apartment."

Phil nods. "I'm sure. As long as there's a roof over my head and food in my mouth, I'm happy."

"Is your mother okay with you moving in with me?"

"Uh-huh. I spoke to her earlier and she's fine with it as long as I keep studying hard."

He smiles. He's lucky to have an intelligent, grateful son. "Just so you know, the no sex, drugs, and smoke rule your mother and I have on you two will still stand."

Phil laughs. "I wasn't planning on doing any of those things anyway."

"Alright." His hand grips the doorknob. "How long do you want to stay with me?"

Phil shrugs. "A couple weeks, maybe more."

He opens the door. "You can stay as long as you want. Whatever is going on between you and Fiona, I want you two to properly fix it."

"Okay," Phil affirms. "Fi and I will be fine. We're family, dad. Families can get through anything."

* * *

~:~

* * *

On Sunday morning at the Howell residence, Simon stands on the front lawn, his luggage at his feet. It's 7:30 AM, a time when Tabitha is usually awake and three hours before Dan and Adrian get out of bed. _This is it. You can do it, Simon. It's time for you to face them._

With a shaky hand, his knuckles make three knocks on the door. His heartbeat escalates during the few seconds that he waits for someone to open the door. A couple of minutes later, the door swings open, but it's not Tabitha who answers the door.

"Dad?"

He stares at the face of his older son. "Hi Dan."

A range of emotions appears on Dan's face – surprise, anger, disgust, sadness, then finally relief. Simon can only remain quiet as he awaits his son's response.

"You're back."

 _So far, so good._ "I made a promise, right?"

The sadness returns on Dan's face. "But promises can be broken." Simon senses an underlying meaning behind the statement that has no relation to his return. However, he chooses not to question it, unwilling to aggravate Dan and destroy the fragile peaceful tension.

"Not this one," Simon replies. "I wasn't going to be a bad father and leave you, Adrian, and your mother to fend for yourselves."

Dan gives him a curt nod. "You have a point." He opens the door wider. "Come in. Mom's making breakfast."

"I thought you preferred to sleep in on weekends." There has only been a handful of times when his sons are awake earlier than 10 AM.

Dan shrugs. "My sleep schedule's been rocky since you left."

"I'm sorry," Simon apologizes. "For leaving, for not being a father for the last couple months." _For sleeping with a women that isn't your mother._

"I forgive you." Dan steps aside. "And I'm sure mom and Adrian will forgive you too once you apologize to them."

"I hope so." He picks up his luggage, then steps indoors. "I missed you all."

Dan smiles. "Welcome home, dad."

* * *

~:~

* * *

They stand in front of each other in the kitchen, discussing what has happened to them during Simon's absence. Simon learns that Tabitha and Johnathan agreed to remain as friends, and Tabitha learns that he stayed over at his assistant Stephanie's apartment.

"So… you don't want a divorce?" Simon questions. He thought that Tabitha and Johnathan would get back together, so to hear the opposite is both a relief and a disappointment. He doesn't want their marriage in shambles, though he hasn't fully sorted out what kind of emotions he has toward Stephanie yet.

Tabitha shakes her head. She still loves Simon, even if her heart wants Johnathan. "What I had with Johnathan was great, but it's us that matters more. Let's put this all behind us. Let go of our pain and suffering and start fresh."

A small smile appears on Simon's face. _Steph is my assistant; Tabitha is my wife. Family always comes first._ "So we're good?"

She nods. _Love is choosing what's right over what makes me happy._ "We're good."

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's Friday evening at the Lester residence. The eight friends are working on homework assignments in Phil's room. After an emotional rollercoaster during the weekend, the school week passed by like a blur. Fiona's outburst at Martyn's funeral and Simon's return has made Dan's mind a complete mess. Luckily, he had school to distract him from his real world problems.

Fiona has barely talked to them since the funeral. When they are with their friends, she spares the occasional glance at the two boys, but talks directly to them when they are around Louise, PJ, Alfie, Zoe, and Joe. At lunchtime, she behaves like her cheery self, though someone who looks straight into her eyes can tell that she harbors a grudge. Dan is surprised that the others haven't picked up on her attitude around him and Phil, though he has to admit that she has done a good job acting as if their heated conversation never happened.

 _"If I were you, I'd tell them ASAP."_ How much time can pass before Fiona is impatient and tells their friends about their relationship? Despite her apparent anger toward Dan, he hopes that her fondness for him will be enough for her to bite her tongue so she won't slip up and reveal their secret before he's ready. He's planning to wait until prom season when he and Phil can tell their friends that they are dating so they won't be too surprised when they go to prom as each other's prom dates.

As for Simon's return, he's glad that his family is complete again, even if the completeness is awkward. Adrian was ecstatic the moment that he saw their father relaxing on the sofa with their mother. The joy from their reunion increased when he and Adrian eavesdropped on Simon and Tabitha's private conversation after breakfast and they overheard their parents wanting to move past what happened to them and make their marriage work.

Throughout the week, the two events remind Dan just how much change is inevitable. Similar to his 12-year-old self that baked red velvet cupcakes on Mother's Day, changes are a part of growing up. For him, the changes that are happening are more life-changing than a typical teen should face. Despite having his father back, a part of him feels that now is the calm before a storm. The affair was the first storm and with a betrayal like that, it wouldn't be surprising if a second storm hit soon. His life is slowly becoming a dramatic soap opera with the gigantic climax as the event that's yet to unfold.

With tonight's sleepover at the Lesters, Fiona could end her ruse. Without prying ears of the student body, a group sleepover is the ideal time when she can easily hint to everyone about his relationship with Phil. _She won't do it. She cares about Phil and I. She wouldn't be selfish and sabotage her brother's happiness._

"Where are my math whizzes?" Joe asks. He's sitting cross-legged on the floor, working on his algebra homework. "This wizarding apprentice is summoning for your help."

PJ scoots closer to him, abandoning his laptop to assist Joe. "What do you need help on?"

"A word problem." Joe releases a drawn-out sigh. "My brain is fried from staring at it. "

"How fried?"

"As fried as a crispy fried chicken."

"Mmmm… fried chicken." Dan chuckles at the sight of Alfie's salivating mouth.

"We just ate a half hour ago," he tells Alfie.

Alfie grins. "I'm hungry anytime someone mentions food."

"I thought you were hungry on love," Fiona remarks, glancing between Alfie to Zoe.

Alfie looks toward Zoe lovingly. "Which is yet to be satisfied."

"I love you too, you dunderhead," she says with a hint of a smirk.

"Yay! You love me!" he lunges forward and pulls her in for a hug.

"We all do," Zoe says, shoving him away. "So does your family. Love is love."

"Except when it's the wrong kind of love," Fiona adds.

Dan freezes. He knows that comment was meant for him and Phil. _Fiona, don't you dare say a word._

"Are you saying we're not meant to be in love?" Zoe questions in a curious tone.

"Oh no. Not you two. You two would be perfect together." She darts her eyes between him and Phil, then directs her attention back to Zoe and Alfie. "But you know, there are some couples in the world that are wrong for each other."

Louise looks at Fiona in sympathy. "You still feeling down after the funeral?"

"Ummm… yeah." She shrugs. "Reality is shit and we just gotta deal with it."

Dan holds back a relieved sigh. Hearing those words hurts, but at least her resentment hasn't taken away every ounce of respect for him. _I guess that's what love does to people. They'll swallow their pride to make the one they love happy._

"Reality is shit," Alfie agrees. "Which is why I like to live in my dreams 'cause that's where lady love and I are happily in love."

"So are some people I know," Fiona mumbles, so softly that Dan hopes he was the only one that listened to what she said.

Unfortunately, Dan wasn't the sole person that heard Fiona's comment. Joe's eyes glimmer in curiosity. "Someone hooked up? Who?"

Phil glances toward Dan. _What do we do?_ his eyes seem to communicate toward Dan.

Dan shrugs. His insides are beginning to fuel with irritation, wishing for Fiona to stop with her double-sided statements. If she wanted to tell their friends, she would have done so already. How much more torture will she have to put him and Phil through until she puts them out of their misery?

"No one important," she tells their friends, dismissing the subject.

"I want to know!" Joe exclaims. "Nothing interesting ever happens with the freshies. My classmates always ask me for any latest gossip from the upperclassmen since I'm with you guys most of the time."

"I want to know too," Louise seconds. "I certainly haven't heard anyone in our year getting together lately."

"Who cares about other people's relationships?" Phil jumps in, disagreeing with Joe and Louise's interest in whoever supposedly hooked up. "Whoever they are, they're just gonna break up after a week."

"Not this couple, or so I've heard," Fiona says. "I heard they're attached to the hip."

"That's what most couples that'll later break up are like at first."

"So? I see the way they look at each other. They're totally in love and I'm surprised no one else has figured it out."

"Maybe they don't want people to know. Maybe they want people to mind their own business."

"Well, hidden relationships don't last forever. Look at what happened with dad."

"Fi, dad had an _affair_. An affair is different from two single people that got together and are choosing to keep their relationship status to themselves."

"It's still the same! The _relationship_ is still being kept a secret."

Joe looks between Fiona and Phil. "Uh…"

"There's always a reason for a relationship to be kept under wraps," Phil counters against Fiona.

"So what? Every relationship is meant to be exposed at some time," Fiona counters back.

"It needs to be told at the right place at the right time."

"Well, what if the right _time_ is right under your fucking nose?"

"GUYS," PJ interjects. "What's going on? Fiona, who hooked up? Phil, why don't you want your sister to tell us?"

"Because it's not important for now," Phil reasons. "Can we drop this and help Joe with his math problem?"

"Not important. NOT IMPORTANT?" Fiona stands up from her spot on the floor. "It is important. How can you say it's not important when the relationship is so obvious that everyone is stupid for not seeing it?"

"BECAUSE IT'S NOT YOUR PLACE TO TELL!" Phil shouts.

 _Shit. Shit. Shit._ Dan backs away to a corner of the room, pretending that he's not there. The situation is getting out of hand. He feels awful for not saying anything to defend Phil. He's afraid that if he says something, Fiona will spill the beans.

He crosses his fingers behind his back. _Shut up, Fiona. Shut up now._

"Kids?" Johnathan cracks open the door, peering into the room. "Phil, Fiona, can you please keep it down? Your mother and I can hear you."

"Fucking hell." Fiona huffs, glaring at Phil. "I'm sick of keeping your little secret. I told you that if I'm pissed off, I'm gonna tell everyone. I'M PISSED OFF RIGHT NOW."

"That's because you brought that upon yourself," Dan declares, finding his voice and standing up. "If you kept your mouth shut, this argument wouldn't be happening."

She huffs. "Right, because you're talking like you're the king of the universe."

 _Alright, this has gone too far._ " _I'm_ acting like the king of the universe? _You're_ acting like a little brat who didn't get what she wanted for her birthday."

"I'm not a little brat, _Daniel_. I'm 17."

"Don't you dare say my name like that, Fiona _Mikayla_."

"Why? Aren't you just as annoyed to hear someone say something that shouldn't be said?"

"At least my name isn't some gigantic fucking secret that can change lives."

"Are you talking about my life now or yours?"

"KIDS." Susan appears next to Johnathan at the door. "What are you fighting about?"

Zoe glances helplessly between Phil and Fiona. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Lester. But can someone explain to me and everyone here what relationship or secret or whatever it is that Dan, Phil, and Fiona are talking about?"

"It's nothing," Dan and Phil answer in unison.

Fiona growls. "It's not nothing. There are two people in this room in a relationship and they're not telling us."

"Uh… Zalfie is nonexistent," Zoe pipes in.

Fiona shakes her head at Zoe and Alfie. "I'm not about you two." She points at her brother and a brunette boy. "I'm talking about these two. I'm the one that liked Dan first, but Phil stole him from me. Don't you get it? Dan and Phil are the people that hooked up. They are the ones that are in love."

* * *

 **Almost at the midpoint of the story, you guys! So Phan is now in the open. How shall everyone react?**

 **So who watched Dan and Phil's MV for The Internet is Here? Man, if they could do it for that song, I wish they'd do it for Ladders and all the other songs they made up for PINOF. xD**

 **~ AA**


	17. Stubbornness and a Parent's Acceptance

Chapter 17: Stubbornness and a Parent's Acceptance

Haiku

 _In heavy thinking_

 _If you don't know what to say_

 _Simply answer yes_

* * *

Silence resonates through the Lester residence. In Phil's bedroom, eight teens and the Lester parents are speechless. Pairs of irises immediately lock onto Dan and Phil. Susan stares at her son, disappointment flooding through her body.

How had she not known that Phil and Dan are together? Reading people is what she's good at. She's skilled at suspecting something that has the likely outcome of being true. It was how her instincts allowed her to infer that Johnathan had a mistress. But how did she not have the instinct to see that there's more than friendship between two teenage boys?

Zoe pumps her fist in the air. "I knew it! My analysis wasn't wrong!"

Fiona gasps. "You knew this whole time?"

Zoe looks at Fiona apologetically. "I sort of had a feeling that something was going on between Dan and Phil since they went to that Muse concert."

"I'm also guilty," Louise says, raising her hand. "Zoe came to me for Pentland insight and we kept this to ourselves because we weren't sure if we were right and we didn't want to make you mad."

"AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN BOTHER TO TELL ME?" she shrieks. She glances at PJ, Joe, and Alfie. "How about you three? Did you guys suspect anything?"

PJ shakes his head. "I'm just as surprised as you are."

"Me too," Joe adds.

"Me three." Alfie chimes in. "But to be honest, had I known Dan and Phil were gay, I would've shipped them."

"Bi," Dan corrects. "Sorry I didn't say anything about my sexuality."

"It's alright," Louise assures him. "I'm not mad at you. I think you and Phil make a lovely couple."

Joe beams. "You two are gonna show everyone at school who's boss."

PJ pats Dan and Phil on their shoulders. "Congrats. I think it's cool we'll have a slash pair in our group. Gotta love the diversity."

"That's for race and gender," Joe jokes.

Dan chuckles. "So you all aren't mad that Phil and I didn't tell you?"

"Of course not!" Zoe replies. "Now we can all celebrate a new shipping that doesn't involve me and Alfie. What would be your shipping by the way… Phan? Dil?"

"Phan," Phil tells her.

"All hail Phan!" Louise says, raising her fist in the air.

The teens start to ask the couple about the progression of their relationship. Fiona, in tears, storms out of the room and into hers, slamming the door behind her. _Now my daughter knows how it feels to love someone that doesn't love her back._

"So Dan and Phil," Johnathan muses from next to her, closing the door in front of them. "I never saw it coming."

She looks up at her husband. "What do you think? When should we tell Dan later to break up with Phil?"

"What? Why would we do that?"

She raises an eyebrow. "Our daughter is heartbroken, John. And to be completely honest, I don't think Dan and Phil will last long. Just look at them. They love each other now, but give it a few months and that love will be gone. We may as well end their relationship now so they won't be hurting too much later."

"Are you serious?" Johnathan leans against the wall. "We shouldn't interfere with our son's relationship. Look at him. He's happy with Dan."

"John, be reasonable. They're in high school. What do they know about true love?"

He motions between the two of them. "They know love better than us."

She groans. _Did he have to use our marriage as an example?_ "What about Fiona? Apparently, she liked Dan first. Therefore, Phil shouldn't be in a relationship with Dan."

"She'll get over it eventually. You can't fight love, Susan."

She sighs. "You do realize I'm not saying this because Dan is Tabitha's son. I would have the same opinion regardless of the person involved."

"I know. Plus, weren't you homophobic?"

"That was when we were younger. I'm not a fan of homosexuals, but I'm not opposed to gay marriages. If my son is gay… well, he's gay. We can't force him not to be."

He smiles. "Good."

 _I'd be a bad mother if I didn't support Phil's sexuality. The last thing I want is for my children to despise me._ "I'm not a completely horrible person. I've changed, John."

"Not really," he mutters.

"What?" she says sharply.

"Nothing," he responds in a faux sweet tone. He looks toward Fiona's closed bedroom door. "You should go talk to Fiona."

"Why me?"

"She's a girl. She'll listen to you more than me."

"You're her father. You know boys better than me."

He shakes his head. "I'm not in the mood to argue with you. Go be a mother to Fiona now and I'll check on her later." He backs away from the wall and heads to their room. "Just so you know, if I were you, I'd think twice about whose side we'll take."

* * *

~:~

* * *

Later in the night, the eight teens prepare for bed. With Fiona apparent anger still hanging in the air, the friends decide to clutter themselves in Phil's room and leave Fiona to her own devices. Louise and Zoe tried their best to comfort their third female friend after her talk with Susan, but she pushed them away and refused to speak to the people that didn't bother to warn her about a possibility of Dan and Phil as a couple.

Johnathan is waiting in the hallway after Phil finishes changing into his pajamas and brushing his teeth in the bathroom. He spent a good 20 minutes gathering his thoughts while freshening up. Aside from Fiona, he's relieved that his friends are accepting about his relationship with Dan. He was afraid that they'd be as mad as his sister. He wouldn't have known what to do if he had to argue with the people that he desperately hoped for Phan's approval.

"Dad," he says. "What do you want?"

"Nothing much. I just came to tell you that I gave Dan my blessing for him to date you."

He laughs. "Dad, it's the 21st century. Even if you didn't give a 'blessing,' I'd still be seeing Dan."

Johnathan chuckles. "I know, Phil. But it's my job as a parent to make sure that my son chooses a right suitor."

"Dad," he whines. "Stop using terms from the Middle Ages."

Johnathan raises an eyebrow. "Would you prefer the term 'fuck buddy?'"

He groans. _I'm gonna have a cringe attack later for hearing dad say "fuck buddy._ " "On second thought, suitor is fine."

Johnathan grins. "You're a lot like your old man. We fall in love with a person in the most unlikely circumstances."

Phil notices the tiny spark in his father's eyes. Mrs. Howell made him happy, so it's a disappointment that he gave up on her to keep their family intact. Phil found love with a boy that literally walked into his life unexpectedly. He can only hope that his father can still find love with his mother.

Phil clears his throat. "Speaking of love, how does mom feel about Dan and I?"

Johnathan rubs the back of his head awkwardly. "You know your mother. Honestly, she wants you to break up with Dan."

 _As expected._ "What did you tell her?"

"Well, I told your mother that she shouldn't interfere with your love life. After what happened between Tabitha and I, I didn't want you to suffer through the way I did."

 _Good, because I don't ever want to give up on Dan._ "Everything will be okay though. Dan's parents are okay. You and mom are sort of okay. Everyone can be together forever."

Johnathan looks at Phil, amused. "Together forever? Is that what all the teenagers like to say?"

Phil laughs. "Only if the teenagers are happily in love."

Johnathan gives Phil a firm pat on his shoulder. "You are like your old man. Trust me, your mother and your sister will come around someday. Once they see how much you and Dan love each other, they'll learn to accept your relationship."

 _Wonder when 'someday 'will be._ "When will that day come?"

Johnathan shrugs. "Just give it some time. I'm sure that after a while, they'll grow tired of their resentment, look at the bright side of things, and give you two a chance."

* * *

~:~

* * *

On Saturday night, Phil eats dinner with Dan and his family at his house. They've just revealed to Dan's family about his relationship with Phil. Now that their friends and Phil's parents are aware of the two of them as a couple, it's only fair for Dan's familial loved ones to be brought out of the dark too.

"You're not mad, aren't you?" Dan asks Simon and Tabitha nervously. "We've been meaning to tell you this, but we wanted to wait until the time was right."

Phil squeezes Dan's hand from underneath the table. "I love your son with every fiber of my being. He's the love of my life and I don't know what I'd do without him."

Simon grins. "That's almost word for word of what I told Tabitha's family when she told them I was her boyfriend."

Tabitha laughs. "Your father was quite a charmer back then."

"So… this is okay?" Dan lifts his and Phil's entwined fingers in the air.

Tabitha smiles. "Of course! As long as you're happy, then I'm happy."

Simon nods in agreement. "Just make sure this won't affect your performance in school. I don't want to hear any news of eloping before you two graduate."

"Dad," Dan whines.

"Promise me, son."

"I promise," Dan vows, his cheeks heating in embarrassment.

"This relationship will last," Adrian predicts through a mouthful of tossed salad. "I'm pretty sure all the couples at my school are gonna break up in the end anyway."

Phil chuckles. "That's the beauty of slash. We can be cute," he kisses Dan's cheek, "But be absolutely real."

"A fantasy come to life," Adrian comments. "I wish I had a girlfriend."

"No girlfriend until you're in high school, Adrian," Simon warns.

"Dad. I'm 12, not 7."

"I mean it, Adrian."

"Fine," Adrian mumbles.

Dan and Phil glance at each other with beaming eyes. This reveal went far better than they hoped for.

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's lunchtime at early noon on Monday. Fiona strolls into the cafeteria, hasty to buy her lunch, sit down, and eat. The sooner she finishes her lunch in the cafeteria, the sooner she can go to the library so she can put some distance between herself and her friends. She's still angry at them for being openly supportive of Dan and Phil's relationship. This time, her anger is directed toward Louise and Zoe, who she resents for their choice not to tell her about their early suspicions of Dan and Phil being more than friends. She would have refused to believe their suspicions if they had told her, but at least she would have had a heads up when the suspicions turned out to be true.

On the bright side, since the revelation of Phan, Dan and Phil have made their relationship public to the entire school. Nerds were overly supportive of them, while jocks and popular cliques called them "fags" behind their backs. Without her intelligence and the specks of closeness left with her brother, she too would treat the two boys like the popular folks.

Standing in line, she constantly looks over her shoulder to make sure that her friends haven't entered through the double doors. She has been avoiding them since the sleepover. Over the weekend, she was cooped up in her room, burying herself in homework and building unnecessary knowledge by reading through pages of her school textbooks. She craved a healthy distraction, and what better way to do so than with school-related stuff?

"Who are you looking for?" the girl in front of Fiona questions. She has shoulder-length blonde hair, blue eyes, and wide-framed glasses. Fiona doesn't recognize her, so she assumes that she must be a freshman.

"No one important."

"Where are your friends?"

"Mind your business," she snaps. _Why does some unknown freshie care what I'm up to?_

"Sorry," she mumbles. "If this is about your brother, I feel sorry for you."

She raises an eyebrow. So the girl is aware about Dan and Phil's relationship. She's not surprised. It's not everyday that the school has an official homosexual couple to talk about. "I don't need to be pitied."

The girls shrugs. "I'm not pitying you. It's just that the way you're acting reminds me of Hannah Conday."

"Don't ever compare me to that bitch," Fiona snarls, her blood boiling. "Unlike Hannah, I have my pride and dignity." _And my virginity, which I'm proud to have perfectly intact._

The girl rolls her eyes. "Sure."

Fiona huffs, ignoring the girl for the rest of the five minutes that it takes for her to grab her lunch. Hannah was one of the students that called Dan and Phil fags. If Fiona wasn't still harboring her grudge against Phil, she would have yanked locks of Hannah's hair and thrown it into a fire.

Once she gets her lunch, she carries her tray and sits down on one of the empty tables. She sighs. She never eats lunch alone. She's used to being at the lunch table, listening to the boys joke around and her girls bantering along with them. Without them, she feels like an outcast.

"Need some company, miss goody two shoes?"

She looks up. Hannah, Katie, and Jessica drop their designer bags on the table, sitting down across from her. She grimaces at the trio. She isn't in the mood for her usual snark with the well-known clique.

"What do you want?" _If someone told me they'd be coming, I would've sucked it up and gone to eat with Phil and the others._

"Is that any way to talk to your superiors?" Katie says, her green eyes staring at Fiona like a snake. Her long wavy brown hair is tied up in a ponytail, completing the fashionable but shallow look.

Fiona chews nonchalantly on her bland school-served hamburger. "Funny. I don't see any teacher, principal, or superintendent speaking to me."

Hannah purses her lips. "Whatever, miss goody two shoes. We saw you sitting alone and wanted to come here to say that we're on your side."

"My side? On what?"

"About Dan and Phil!" Jessica exclaims, a twinkle in her blue eyes. With her jet black shoulder length hair and slightly nice attitude, Fiona wonders how she could tolerate Hannah and Katie. In some way, Jessica reminds Fiona of a blend between Dan and Phil, but in female form.

"Why do you care about my brother and his boyfriend?" Fiona grumbles.

"Because," Hannah stares at Fiona with what seems to be a genuine look of sympathy, "I know how it feels to be betrayed." She glances at a table where Courtney Miller and her four friends are sitting. Courtney used to be a part of Hannah's clique in middle school, but they had some sort of fallout. Nowadays, she hangs out with Olivia and her three childhood friends: Keith, Noah, and Shayne (who's also Courtney's boyfriend). "You like Dan, don't you?"

"What makes you think that?"

"I don't need to think. Any girl with eyes can see the way you look at Dan."

"You look at him the same way," she retorts. You look at any cute guy like a piece of meat.

Hannah smirks. "That's different. You're the envy of every girl at school because you're the one that actually knows him."

"So?"

"So?" Katie copies Hannah's expression. "Dan Howell could've gotten a pick of any girl in school, but he chose Phil. PHIL. LESTER. How can be stupid to see that his other half is Phil and not you? You're perfect for him! I didn't even know that he was a fag."

"He's bi," Fiona clarifies.

"He's still a fag."

"Not really," Jessica comments. "It still makes him partly interested in girls."

Fiona puts her hamburger back down on her tray. "Listen, if you're trying to be nice so you can steal Dan away from Phil, don't even bother. I'm pissed at my friends and I'm not talking to them until they side with me."

Hannah smiles. "Spoken like a true warrior. Until that happens, you can stick with us."

"Seriously?" Fiona says in a dull tone. The last thing she'd want is to be a member of her nemesis's clique.

"We're not asking you to be our bestie. We're just gonna look after you 'till your little group comes running back to you," Katie explains.

 _Well, at least I'm not joining a motorcycle gang. Or a cult. And Jessica won't drive me as crazy as Hannahconda._ "Fine. Just don't expect me to start wearing mini skirts and red heels tomorrow."

Hannah grins, the superficial expression being the only thing that has brightened her day so far. "Bet you wouldn't even own any of those things." She flips her hair over one shoulder. "Welcome to the team, miss goody two shoes."

* * *

~:~

* * *

For Zoe, love wasn't intended to be on her radar for the school year. Junior prom is in two weeks. A year ago, she resigned to the likelihood of being Alfie's date. If Dan hadn't moved to their hometown, she would rather go to prom with Phil since there's absolutely no romantic sparks between them. But Phil is in a relationship now, and there's no single boy in school that she's remotely interested to going to prom with. Her only option is her lovesick best friend.

Her feelings for Alfie felt off since the weekend that he joined her family on their hiking trip. Everything that happened on that day was as if the universe was desperately dropping moment after moment in an attempt to get them together. The compliments, the book, the cheek kiss… it's all too much for her brain to take. And with the exposure of Dan and Phil's relationship, a part of her wishes that she too has her significant other. She wants to experience every kiss, hug, and hand-holding shares between the two boys with a boy that will give her warm tingles in her stomach every time that she sees him.

She feels the warm tingles. However, she's feeling it for the boy that she vowed never to fall in love with.

"YOU ARE IN LOVE WITH ALFIE!" Louise squeals loudly. It's Thursday afternoon and Zoe is at Louise's house, sitting across from her best friend on her twin-sized bed. With everyone working except for her, Louise, and Joe, she's in need for Pentland insight to find any confirmation that her emotions are anything other than feelings for Alfie.

She throws a pillow at Louise. "No I'm not! It must be my hormones. Or an effect of Dan and Phil being a couple. Or… or… or something!" She buries her face in her hands. "Help me, Lou."

"I am helping." Louise throws her pillow aside. "I was starting to worry it'll never happen, but it did! I can't wait to tell Alfie the good news."

"NO!" Zoe shrieks in protest. "Don't say a word to him. If he finds out, he's gonna tease me about it for the rest of my life."

"He's not gonna tease you. He loves you."

"He does not."

"He does. Watch. I'm gonna get him to ask you on a date and you are gonna say yes. Then you are gonna say 'I love you' and listen to him say it back to you."

She groans. _That stuff only happens in movies._ "How exactly will a date solve my problem?"

Louise beams. "It's gonna solve all your love-related problems. Zoe, if you and Alfie are alone together for a few hours, you'll see that Zalfie is meant to be."

Silence. Louise's Pentland insight is only making her more confused. What if Louise is wrong about Alfie being in love with her? What if all the signs over the years is a false promise of romantic happiness? She saw what the bad side of love has done to Fiona. Zoe fears that Fiona's behavior will make her reluctant to ever forgive them, especially since she spends her lunch period with Hannah and her friends nowadays. When Fiona holds a grudge, it's difficult for Zoe and the others to help her let it go. If Alfie's attraction for her isn't more than infatuation, then there's a chance that she could lose him too.

"Let's say I am in love with Alfie," Zoe says hypothetically. "Why am I only developing feelings for Alfie now? Wouldn't it have started earlier, like around middle school?" Their middle school years was the time when Louise began crushing on Matt, and fortunately for her, Matt secretly harbored feelings for her not long after.

Louise smiles at her knowingly. "It's not all of a sudden. You've always loved Alfie as more than a friend. You just didn't know it."

"Lou, I'm not dumb. I would've known if I was falling in love with Alfie."

Louise shakes her head. "You and Fi are the most stubborn friends I have. While Fi's stubborn like her mom, the only times you're stubborn is when it comes to Alfie."

"What are you saying?"

"Bestie, your stubbornness is the whole reason why you act the way you are around Alfie. Alfie teases you to hide his feelings for you, and you tease him back because somewhere deep inside, you have feelings for him too. It's probably whatever happened at that hike when you subconsciously let go of your stubbornness and give in to your true feelings." She pauses, then continues. "Your feelings for Alfie are the feelings that Bella had for Jacob." _A Twilight comparison? Well that's interesting._ "It seemed like she fell in love with him all of a sudden in Eclipse, but the love started back in New Moon. Her love for Edward is a sweep-you-off-your-feet romance, but her love for Jacob was gradual and realistic, just like your love for Alfie is."

Zoe's face flushes. _Is it getting hot in here? Do I need to take off some clothes?_ Everything that Louise said makes sense. Her frequent annoyance toward Alfie is her way of loving him. She felt love when she viewed Alfie's sketches of her. She felt love when he held her bridal-style while they walked down the mountain. She felt love when he kissed her cheek, a gesture that once felt like a bug crawling on her skin but instead causing her already racing heart beating faster when he did it at that time. She felt love at several other moments of the school year: their slow dance at the Halloween dance, the first time that she rode with him on his motorcycle, and the notebook that he gave her on Valentine's Day. If what Louise said is true, every gesture that Alfie has done is his way of showing her that he loves her. The way that he annoys her is how they've remained close all these years.

Her rosy cheeks is a sign. It's an indication that she's succumbing to what destiny tried to make her realize all along.

"I'm right, aren't I?" Louise says in glee.

Zoe gazes at her mother-like best friend. After several seconds, she nods.

"I'm in love with the most annoying guy on Earth," she murmurs. "I love Alfie Deyes."

* * *

~:~

* * *

At 6:32 PM, a boy arrives at the Suggs' house. His blonde-haired friend texted him to meet with her and his lady love before he goes home. The only details that she told him is that he has to be ready to ask the girl that he has loved for years out on a date. _Zoe always tells me no when I ask her. If Lou forced her to say yes, it's not gonna work. I want her to say yes on her own terms and not because of someone else._

The two girls are waiting outside for him. In a span of eight minutes, his longtime wish turns from a dream to reality.

 ** _"Alright Zoe. I know what your answer is, but Louise told me to try anyway. Lady love, will you do me the honor of going on a date with me."_**

 ** _"Yes."_**

 _ **"It's okay. I under – WAIT. Did you say yes?"**_

 _ **"Yes, dunderhead. Didn't you hear me the first time?"**_

 _ **"I… ummm… really? Did Louise put you put up to this?"**_

 _ **"Yes to the date, no to Louise telling me to."**_

 _ **"So you do want to go on a date with me?"**_

 _ **"YES. Do I have to yell it out for you?"**_

 ** _"Can you? I want the world to hear you tell me you said yes to going out with me."_**

 _ **"I had a long day, Alfs. I'm not yelling for anyone. Yes, I'll go on a date with you. It'll finally make you shut up so we can get this over with."**_

 _ **"Yes! Thank you, love! I promise that you won't regret it. Where do you want to go?"**_

 _ **"Why are you asking me? You're the guy. You pick. Just don't take me somewhere too expensive or else."**_

 _ **"Alright. Oh Zoey, you and I are gonna have the best time ever."**_

He's beaming and cheering to himself once he says goodbye to the girls and walks home. _Finally._

She's sighing and wondering what she got herself into as she watches him leave, but once he's gone, a slow smile appears on her face. _I don't want that nitwit to be with anyone else but me._

* * *

 **Hannah is back! I told she would, right? And even though the Smosh squad was only mentioned in this chapter, they will have a little bit of involvement in the story in a later chapter. Speaking of Smosh squad, I'll put this out there and say that I absolutely love how Shayne finally has his own show! The experiment with the liquid nitrogen reignited my interest in science and I'm kinda hoping I'll see him do a dissection of an animal body part in a future video.**

 **~ AA**


	18. Dates and a Confession

Chapter 18: Dates and a Confession

Haiku

 _If the chance comes up_

 _Opportunities are rare_

 _To be their right hand_

* * *

It's 9:45 on a Saturday morning. With Tabitha next to him, Johnathan unlocks the front door of an empty 5th floor apartment. Last night, Johnathan texted Tabitha to ask her if she had free time the next day so he could show her something important. Initially, she was concerned about the possibility of a repeat performance of Susan's invasion on their night together several months ago. There's no telling when she could pop up, make a scene, and ruin their time together. But with Simon's reassurance that he doesn't mind her friendship with Johnathan, she agreed to spend the day with him.

After picking her up at their usual meeting place, he drove them to an apartment complex near the hotel that he works at. He had told her that there was an apartment that he favored to live in. She's happy that he found a solution to fixing his marriage with Susan without resorting to divorce, and because he'll be living away from Susan, she won't have to worry too much about seeing him so they can spend quality, platonic time together.

"Nice place," she comments as she and Johnathan step into the spacious apartment.

He nods in agreement. "Got the keys a couple days ago, so I'm good to go. Two bedrooms and a bathroom. It's pretty small, but it's decent."

 _Small? Seems rather roomy._ "So it's yours?"

"As of two days ago, yes."

She examines the pale walls of the apartment. "When do you plan on moving in?"

"Soon. Phil and Fiona are helping me pack. I'm planning for next weekend since Phil is going to prom the weekend after."

 _If only my future could be just as easy as his._ If she was the one that has to move out, she doesn't know the first thing about buying an apartment. She lived with her parents until she married Simon, and he took care of all the paperwork when it came to their previous and current houses. "That's great. Would you want some help moving in?"

"That would be nice."

She smiles. Their lives are back on the right track. She won't let an emotion called love ruin it again.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Meanwhile, Fiona is playing video games at Anthony's house. Her lifestyle has changed significantly over the last few days. At school, she spends her lunch period with Hannah, Katie, and Jessica. Outside of school, she's hanging out with Ian and Anthony when she isn't working at Leroy's. Right now, Ian is working at Pizza Hut, so it's just her and Anthony until 5 PM when Ian's shift is over.

Anthony is just as concerned about Fiona as her friends are. Since meeting Phil and the others at Martyn's funeral, he has added all of them on Facebook and chats with them sometimes on Facebook messenger. He's getting closer to all of them, which is something that he kept from Fiona. The same goes for Ian, which is why they want to hide the fact away from Fiona and their casual college friends (the duo would be a laughing stock if their college friends knew that most of their real friends are high schoolers).

So when Fiona pauses their round of tennis in Wii Fit, he braces himself for another long conversation about a momentous occasion that happened to Fiona between last weekend and now. She would never interrupt a video game unless she wanted to discuss something with him or Ian.

"Do you have any plans on the last Saturday this month?"

"Uh… not that I know of." He hasn't heard of any upcoming weekend party yet. Even though parties aren't his thing, he and Ian will go to one occasionally if they are aware that Pamela will be there (he knows how much Ian has it bad for Pamela).

"Good." She tosses her controller aside and stands up, facing him, blocking his view of the screen.

"Why? Do you have any plans?"

"That depends." She looks at him nonchalantly. "My junior prom is on that day. Hannah, Katie, and Jessica are going and they're expecting me to have a date."

"You're going with them?"

"Why wouldn't I?"

He shrugs. "Still mad at your brother?"

She glares at him. "Yes. Got a problem with that?"

"N-no," he stammers. After she told him and Ian about seeing Dan and Phil together, he gets intimidated whenever she shows any signs of anger.

Her eyes soften. _God, she was as frightening as a Gyrados for a second._ "This is a bit backwards, but I don't give a shit on formalities on this. Anthony, can you be my prom date?"

 _On second thought, that question scares me more than her Gyrados eyes._ When he thinks about his two high school proms, he cringes at the flashbacks of his prom dates. Unlike Fiona, when he and Ian were in high school, they didn't have much popularity. They were frequent targets of bullies and girls strayed away from them. They were dateless for their junior prom, so students had assumed that they were together and called them gay. For senior prom, they had decent dates, though the two girls ditched them for jocks an hour after prom began. The summer before they headed off to college, the two boys enlisted one of their only female friends, Mari, for a complete makeover. In a single summer, they shed their high school images for the looks that they have today, which paid off since they've been fawned over by many college girls once they started their college years.

"Is Phil going?" he questions meekly.

She nods. "We never missed out on our banquets, so there's no way they'll be skipping prom."

"And Joe?"

"He'll get to go when he's a junior. I'm sure he'll be fine spending one night alone."

He deliberates the offer that she's presenting him. This is his chance to have the prom night that he wanted. He'll be comfortable around his date, won't be shunned by the students, and be able to mingle with Phil and his friends (if Fiona won't mind). Plus, he'd get his first look of a hotter version of Fiona for one night (not that she isn't already hot). The only downside is having to deal with Hannah, Katie, and Jessica. From what Fiona tells him about them, they remind him of the girls that always picked on him when he was in high school.

 _It's just a high school prom._ If he says no, Fiona could turn against him just like she did with her brother and her friends.

"There's no one else you want to go with?" He has his pride. He'd decline her offer and face her resentment if she's only asking him to be her date as a last resort.

She moves to sit back down on the couch. "A couple guys asked me, but I told them no. To be honest, you're the only one except Dan and Ian that I'd want to go to prom with, and the two are already taken."

He smiles. It pleases him to hear that she turned down two boys for him.

"Okay." _It's the closest that I'll ever go on a date with a model._

She grins. "So you'll be my date?"

"Yup."

"Yes!" She angles her body and gives him a hug. "You have no idea how much this means to me."

He returns her hug. "It's what friends do." If it was any other girl, he'd decline the offer.

It's Fiona. For the girl that he secretly longs for, he'd do anything for her.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Later that day, Alfie waits patiently outside a movie theater for Zoe. It's a half hour until 5 PM, which is when the movie that he'll watch with Zoe will start. He's distracting himself by playing an RPG game on his phone. If he wasn't in public, he'd be frantically pacing back and forth in order to calm his nerves. He waited all week for this day, and now that the day has arrived, he's having second doubts about it. What if Zoe changed her mind and doesn't come? What if she rejects him when he finally tells her how he feels? What if he can't control his male hormones and impulsively grab her boobs (which he barely controlled himself from doing when he hit puberty)? Many what-if's swim around in his head, and none of them are impossible from happening.

"Alfs!" He looks up from his phone. Zoe is crossing the street and walking to him, her blue Forever 21 purse swinging from her left shoulder. Should he pinch himself? It seems as if this is all a dream. She's wearing a peach-colored dress that reaches just above her knees, a denim vest, and a pair of white sandals. Her outfit is one of the rare times that she's wearing a dress (the closest is a blouse and a mini skirt). _"Dresses equals upskirting. I ain't letting some random guy get a peep show on the streets."_ He knows that the statement from a 12-year-old Zoe was an implication directed toward him, though he wouldn't have done that move anyway. To him, it's disrespectful and he'd want her to willingly show herself to him in all her glory, but first he'd have to be dating her for her glory to be even on display.

"Hello lady love!" he yells to her enthusiastically. _Oh boy oh boy oh boy. This is the moment you've been waiting for, Alfie Deyes. Don't do anything to ruin everything._ In a few hours, he'll be fulfilling his bargain to the boys to confess his feelings for her by prom. He's hoping that if she loves him back, he'll not only possibly have his first kiss with her (his first official kiss was with Marcy Ibarra when he was 13), but he'll also have a date for prom next weekend. With the exception of Joe, who hasn't been asked to prom and still too young to attend prom anyway (from Zoe's perspective), he and Zoe are the only ones without dates. Dan is going with Phil, Louise is going with Matt, and PJ is going with Christy (thanks to persistence from Louise). Even Fiona has a date, though he has a feeling that she only asked Anthony as an attempt to make Hannah and her friends envious. Out of all the students at school that she could hang out with while she's avoiding them, he doesn't understand why she chose Hannah if she hates her that much.

"You look great," she compliments once she joins him.

He feels the warmth rising to his cheeks. The boys helped him pick out his outfit before he went out. They agreed on a striped gray and white t-shirt, blue jeans, and one of his newer pairs of Converse shoes. With what Zoe is wearing, he thinks that his outfit is mediocre in comparison.

"It's nothing. You're the one looking beautiful."

It's her turn to blush.. "Thanks, prince of compliments." The positive aura radiating from her gives him a slight boost of confidence. Her response doesn't have the typical snark whenever he compliments her.

He gestures to the entrance of the theater. "Shall we go?"

She nods. He extends his hand toward her, wondering if she'll allow him to hold his hand. It is a date after all.

Wordlessly, she reaches her hand out and grabs his outstretched hand. The blushes on their cheeks deepen. Wordlessly, they walk through the front entrance. _Maybe I do have nothing to worry about._

* * *

~:~

* * *

He knocks on her door at a few minutes past 6 PM. The door swings open, revealing a barefoot chestnut-haired woman wearing a pale blue camisole and white shorts.

"Simon," she greets. "You're here… does your wife know you're gone?"

He steps inside. "She's with Johnathan."

She nods in understanding. "Your kids?"

"Adrian and Dan are spending their weekends at a friend's house."

"Oh."

"Are you free tonight?"

She looks up at him, confused. "Yes. Why?"

He smiles. "It's long overdue, but would you like to go on a date?"

Her confusion switches to curiosity. "What about your wife?"

"It doesn't matter." I'd rather spend time with you.

"A-are you sure?" _I shouldn't be doing this. He's a married man for goodness sake._

He nods. "We can stay here if you don't want to go out. We can make it a home date."

She giggles. She hasn't had a date in the walls of her own apartment since her relationship with Frank.

"Okay, but don't expect anything to get too intimate."

* * *

~:~

* * *

One sitting of an action flick and a dinner at Burger King later, Alfie is walking Zoe home. The date wasn't as bad as Zoe thought it would be. Conversation was pleasant, though in true Zalfie fashion, she had rolled her eyes several times (they had quite a discussion about events that happened during the movie they watched) and flipped him off whenever he said or did anything idiotic (such as chewing with his mouth full while eating a whooper). Despite the absence of their friends, they behaved like themselves, which was all she expected from the date. She didn't want the date to be like Louise's first date with Matt. Louise was so anxious about her actions that they barely spoke during the date and needed to go on a second date to make up for the awkwardness.

The sun is setting, casting a light glow along the streets of the city. Their hands are brushing along one another's at every step. She's waiting for the opportune moment to tell Alfie the three words. She almost told him while they were at Burger King, but a family sat down at a table next to their just when the words were at the surface of her tongue and she held back for the time being.

"I had fun," she says as they stroll closer to her house. Every step they take is one more step to the end of the date. She has to say the words soon before she reaches her house and her cowardice will overpower at the last second.

"Me too, lady love." His eyes stare straight ahead. She wonders what he's thinking. _Is he waiting for me to say it?_

"Alfs…" she trails off. He says the three words to her like one-digit multiplication problems: easy and with no hesitation. Why is it difficult for her to say it back? Isn't it what he wants to hear too? She knows that she loves him. Those are the emotions that she resisted feeling for him for years. No matter how much he behaved like a lovesick fool, he has always cared and looked out for her. He's an idiot when it comes to socializing, but intelligent when it comes to school. He's who she wants in a significant other, and all it took was for a session of Pentland insight and stripping her stubbornness away temporarily for her to realize that.

She spent a few minutes without her stubbornness. Why can't she do that again so she can get it over with?

He stops walking. Suddenly, he grabs her hands and gazes at her with the same eyes that stared at her when they were hiking down the mountain a few weekends ago. It's the look that she sees Dan and Phil give each other on a daily basis.

"Do you love me, lady love?" he asks softly.

Her heart rate thuds in an arrhythmic beat.

Fast. Slow. Again and again. It's a heartbeat that she only started to experience since Tuesday.

"Of course I do," she replies.

He shakes his head. "I know you love me as a friend. But do you love me more than that?"

The gentle tone of his voice is more than adoration. It's a tone that she only hears lovers use.

"You're… you're special to me," she murmurs. "Do you have any idea what's been on my mind for the last few days?"

A small smile appears on his face. "Do you want me to guess?"

She giggles nervously. "You know, you're the most infuriating boy I've ever known, but I'm pretty lucky to have a friend that can get under my skin and put up with all the sarcasm I retaliate with."

His smile widens. "I do it only for you, lady love."

"But why? Why only me? What is it about teasing me all the time that makes it fun for you?"

He squeezes her hands. He steps closer to her until their bodies are millimeters apart. "Teasing you is the only way I can show how much I love you. I want a girl that makes me feel challenged, that sees the world in every shade of color, that stays true to herself and is beautiful inside and out."

She lets out a shaky breath. "So you do love me? This isn't some gigantic childish crush that you haven't let go of since we were in elementary school?"

He chuckles. "Zoe, I've never had just a crush on you. I've always wanted you as more than a friend."

Through her irregular heartbeats, she smiles back at him. "Then I'm crazy to say that I want you as more than a friend too."

He beams. "You love me too?"

She nods, her clammy palms letting go of his hands so her arms encircles his waist. "Yes, nitwit. I'm in love with you."

"Whoo-hoo!" he cheers, a little too loudly that she has to slap the back of his head to quiet him down.

"Shut it, Alfs. The neighborhood's gonna think you're psychologically crazy and call the cops on you."

"I don't care!" She squeals as he lifts her off her feet and swings her around in a full circle. "Zoe Elizabeth Sugg loves me! This is the best day of my life!"

She laughs. _This_ is the love that she wants in her life.

His eyes are filled with enthusiasm. "Can I kiss you?"

Her stomach does somersaults. Eh, why not? "No tongue, okay?"

He pouts. "Never mind then."

She slaps the back of his head again. "I've never been kissed, dunderhead. Don't expect that much lip-action from a first kiss."

"I was kidding." He places his hands on both sides of her face. "I'll take any kiss from you."

Sparks fly when their lips touch.

There's no tongue and it's not perfect, a sloppy kiss with initial teeth clashing. But it's what Zalfie is about. It's what makes the kiss all the more sweeter.

* * *

 **Zalfie at last! Gosh, I waited so long to write their getting together. I wanted to focus on Zalfie getting together, which is why there's no Phan moments in this chapter. But I promise there'll be some Phan moments in the next chap! After all, fluff has to be around when there's a prom night. ;)**

 **PS Zoella doing another Book Club vid made me so happy. I'm a heavy book fanatic and I'm always excited to add on to my reading list.**

 **~ AA**


	19. Fresh Starts and a New Apartment

Chapter 19: Fresh Starts and a New Apartment

Haiku

 _Our love is a song_

 _That never stops, never ends_

 _And will never die_

* * *

On a 5th floor apartment complex at early noon on Saturday, several people are walking up and down the stairs at every few minutes as boxes and furniture are dropped and arranged at a new apartment. It's moving day for Johnathan and Phil. For the last few three hours, the two of them have been getting settled into their new home. Tabitha, Adrian, and Dan and Phil's friends are helping them out, though Fiona declined Johnathan's question for her assistance. With one less friend, PJ had messaged Ian and Anthony on Facebook to help them out, who agreed without hesitation.

"Holy shit," Alfie grunts. "I take it back. This thing is fucking heavy." He's lifting one side of a sofa while Phil is lifting from the other side, the two boys positioning the furniture a few feet away from a flat screen television.

"Shut up and stop complaining," Zoe quips. "That couch was nothing to the bed Lou and I carried."

"Why isn't Anthony doing this? He's got more muscles than me," Alfie complains.

"You're the one who volunteered," Anthony points out. "You wanted to prove you're a strong man."

"But I am strong. I don't need to carry a sofa to prove it."

Sitting on a stool in the kitchen, Adrian chuckles. "If you are a strong man, then you would've been able to carry that without breaking a sweat."

Alfie huffs. "Are you guys all ganging up against me?"

"No one's antagonizing you," Zoe sympathizes, kissing his cheek. "Feel better?"

Zoe's kiss instantly perks him up. "Where do you want this, Phil?"

Restraining a guffaw, Phil gestures to the space on the floor reserved for the large piece of furniture. Phil is more than glad to see Zoe and Alfie together at long last. The group put together a mini potluck the day following the pair's date to celebrate Zalfie as a ship that finally became canon. They waited years for Zoe to fall for Alfie, and now that it has, they couldn't be happier. For Dan and Phil, they can now go on a double date with Zoe and Alfie, a scenario that amuses Phil when he thinks about it.

"I HAVE PIZZA!" PJ bellows seconds after Alfie and Phil place the sofa down on the floor. He and Ian stroll through the open front door, Dominoes pizza boxes in their arms.

Alfie beams. "Food!"

"Thank god you're here," Louise says appreciatively. "I'm starving!"

"Let's eat!" Dan says. Everyone in the room cheers as PJ and Ian set the pizza boxes down on the kitchen table.

As Tabitha and Johnathan bring out varieties of six-packed cans of sodas from the refrigerator, everyone grabs their paper plates and their slices of pizza. Zoe slaps the back of Alfie's head when he tries to sneak a box for himself. Adrian tries to grab a bottle of beer from the elder adults, to which Tabitha reacts by a little scolding and a "You can drink when you're older." PJ and Joe boot up Dan's x-box, and the teens debate playing Mario Kart or Halo first. Fifteen minutes later, the apartment is swarming with competitive gaming screams and consumptions of their lunch.

"We're one big happy family, but I wish Fiona was here," Phil murmurs to Dan, his head resting on the brunette's shoulders, his plate left with half a slice of pepperoni pizza. Their friends are sitting on the floor to be closer to the TV, while the two boys are on the couch and sharing little romantic gestures behind their friends' backs.

"She'll come around," Dan tells Phil. _Will she? It's been a couple weeks. She never stays mad for this long._

"I hope so." Phil misses his sister. The group isn't the same without her. The girls' dynamic doesn't feel right without Fiona there to complete their female trio.

"Don't be sad." Dan smiles. "Turn that frown upside down. Today's supposed to be about celebration. I'm done with mourning."

Dan's comment is enough to make a small smile appear on Phil's face. "You know, I'm sorta disappointed Fi and I won't be roomies, but I'm glad we can sleep together when you come over." Johnathan told Phil that he didn't mind having Dan or any of his friends to stay over.

Dan's lips ghosts along Phil's forehead. "I can finally have my naughty ways with you."

Phil smirks, raising an eyebrow. "Not yet, Hobbit Hair. All in due time."

"Of course, Philly." Dan hugs his shoulders. "Every minute spent with you gives me no regrets for choosing to love you."

Phil reacts with a slow kiss on his boyfriend's lips.

 _With you, our troubles are less harder to face._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Meanwhile, at the juniors section of a mall's Macy's, four teenage girls are searching for dresses to wear for prom. With Susan's assistance, Fiona had already bought hers last Saturday. However, with her mother at work and her refusal to help Phil and Johnathan during their moving day, she decided to make the use of her day by joining Hannah to help Katie and Jessica find their prom dresses (Hannah bought her dress online and is expecting it shipped to her house on Monday).

"That's way too long," Hannah complains, looking at the sparkly purple strapless dress that Jessica is holding.

"Too long? It's up to my knees," Jessica tells her. "I might get kicked out if I pick a dress any shorter than this."

Katie sides with Hannah. "It needs to be shorter. One more inch at least if you want Kevin eating at the palm of your hand."

Jessica rolls her eyes. "I'm not sleeping with him. I can't take away his virginity."

Hannah goes back to browsing the rack of dresses. "I think you should. If he's gonna pop his cherry, he'd better get it from someone that knows what she's doing."

Jessica blushes. "I've only done it to help a couple of guys out. If Kevin doesn't want to have sex, I shouldn't force it."

"Don't be a pussy Jess," Katie remarks. "I bet even our school homos have a better sex drive than Kev." She glances toward Fiona. "Of course, only one of us here still has their cherry, so Kev's not the only one missing out."

 _I like having my virgin card, Katie. Saves me from getting an STD._ Fiona snarls in her head. She can deal with Hannahconda, but Killjoy Katie gives her annoying headaches. There's only so much insults that she can before she can't resist her temptation of leaving a lizard or some sort of reptile in one of Katie's designer handbags.

As if sensing her unease, Jessica shows the dress to her. "What do you think, Fiona?"

She shrugs. "It's up to you. If you like it, buy it."

"I don't like it," Katie declares, snatching the dress away and hanging it back on the rack. "Purple doesn't suit you."

 _Any color is good on Jess than you._

Hannah holds out another dress. The glittery red spaghetti strap dress is shorter than the one that Jessica showed, though Fiona hates to admit how stunning the dress looks. "This is the one."

Katie admires it appreciatively. "Absolutely gorgeous!"

Jessica grins. "It does look nice." She takes the dress from Hannah and notices that the red dress would reach just above her knees.

"I'd go for that one," Fiona says. She genuinely believes that Jessica would look beautiful wearing it.

Jessica beams. "I'll go try it on."

Hannah and Katie squeal in delight. Fiona merely smiles.

She misses shopping with her friends, but with Jessica, it makes hanging with the trio not the worst thing in the world.

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's a slow afternoon at Dillion's and his list is halfway toward being complete. Dan has only a few days left until prom. He should have started at least a week ago, but his procrastinating tendencies and juggling between work and school had made him push the task aside.

He looks down at his list scrawled in his small blue notepad that he uses as his planner. _What other songs can I use?_ He has six songs so far. He prefers to have a minimum of ten. Tomorrow, he's going to ask Louise and Zoe for suggestions. He needs to have a perfect playlist.

"Whatcha doing there, Dan?" Summer asks, walking out of the storage room with a handful of CD's.

"Something for Phil." He glances at his co-worker. "Know any good love songs?"

"Why?"

"It's part of the thing I'm doing for Phil."

She places the CD's on the counter. "If you're looking for rock songs, I don't know a lot of those."

"That's okay. Any song will do."

"Hmmm…" She scrunches her eyebrows thoughtfully. "The first song I thought of was A Thousand Years."

"The Christina Perri one?" Zoe is a big fan of Christina Perri, and he often hears her play songs by the particular artist at sleepovers.

"Yup."

He smiles, jotting down the song title and singer on his list. "Thanks."

She peers down at his list. "Not bad. You planning to serenade Phil or something?"

He chuckles. "Something like that."

"You two are so cute," she says with a grin. "Team Phan all the way."

He nods in response. _Seven songs down, three more to go._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Louise is curious when Dan shows up to school without Phil by his side the next morning. For the last few days, the two boys arrive at the lunch table holding hands every time. Zoe is painting Louise's nails with an aquamarine nail polish. She's hoping that her nails will dry by the time she heads to first period.

"Where's Phil?" Louise immediately asks Dan as he drops his backpack on the ground and sits down across from the girls.

"He had to go to class early," he replies. "Mind if I ask you two something?"

"Sure," Zoe says.

Dan unzips his backpack and takes out a pen and a mini blue notepad. "I'm doing something for Phil on prom night and I need love song recs. Do you have any ideas?"

Zoe paints the rest of the nail on Louise's left thumb, finishing up her entire manicure. "Any preferences?"

He shakes his head. "I've already gone through my iTunes playlist. I just need at least three more." He glances toward Louise. "Lou, you listen to non-English songs. Can you give me a couple I can use?"

In her head, Louise racks through her selection of foreign songs in her phone. She views Dan and Phil's relationship as a love straight out of a foreign drama. She smiles when she remembers the theme song from one of her favorite dramas. "Pangako Sa Yo."

Dan stares at her as if she spoke in an alien language. "What Sa Yo?"

"Pangako Sa Yo," she repeats. "It means I Promise You in Filipino. It's a song all about finding the love of your life and promising to fight for that love no matter what happens."

"I promise you…" he trails off, then scribbles the song title on his list. With all the twist and turns that have been happening to the boys so far this year, she believes that this song is the perfect way to describe their relationship. "I'll listen to it later."

She nods. "I also suggest adding Hulog Ng Langit. The Angeline Quinto version."

Once again, he stares at her incredulously. "Hulog what? Lou, did you learn Filipino or something to know how to pronounce that?"

She giggles. "Once you listen to a lot of foreign music, you'll slowly learn to speak its language."

"Right." He writes down her second song suggestion. "And what does that mean in English?"

"In literal terms, it means 'Heaven Sent.' It's a love song at a pure form. I sing lyrics of it to Matt sometimes."

"Asians are poetically brilliant in music," Zoe comments, dropping her nail polish in the side pocket of her backpack.

"No doubt about that," Dan agrees. "I need one more. Zoe, what do you got?"

"I got one," she tells him. "It's completely English: You've Got This Hold on Me by Cassidy Ford."

He writes the song down. "Never heard of it."

"That's because it's a song that only people who watch Hollywood Heights know."

Louise beams, remembering the TV show that she, Zoe, and Fiona binge-watched when they were in middle school. Thinking about the happier memories involving Fiona makes her long for her best friend. Their group sleepovers are missing her trash talk when she challenges the boys to video games.

She sighs to herself. _Fi, please come back. I still support Phan, but I want the old days to come back._

Love may have darkened her best friend's heart, but the love from Louise and everyone else in the group can provide a better love that she deserves: friendship.

* * *

~:~

* * *

He fiddles with a black box that encases a blue corsage. It's prom night and Anthony is sitting at the driver's seat of his car, the gray vehicle parked outside of the Lesters' house. He's nervous about the prospect of meeting Fiona's mother for the first time. The way that Fiona describes her makes him intimidated to meet her. Fiona's mother reminds him of a stricter version of Mari's mother.

 _You can do this, Anthony. This is the mother of the girl you like. She has to not hate you._

Taking a couple of deep breaths, he slips the box back into the right pocket of his black slacks, opens the car door, and exits out of the vehicle. He texts Fiona as he's walking through the front lawn. _I'm here. U ready?_

The front door of the house swings open less than a minute after he sends the text. His throat constricts at the sight of Fiona. She's wearing a floor-length navy blue sleeveless dress with a slit running at the lower half of the dress. Her makeup is light, accentuating her sky blue eyes and raven hair that cascades over her shoulders in slight curls. Her overall appearance is breathtaking, and he's certain that she'll be the most beautiful girl at the prom tonight.

"Fuck," he mumbles.

She grins. "You look great, Anthony."

"T-thank you," he stutters. I _look like a peasant compared to her._

"So you're Anthony." An older woman with short blonde hair and blue eyes that's the same shade as Fiona's irises appears. This must be her mother.

"Good evening, Mrs. Lester," he says politely to Fiona's mother.

She gives him a curt nod. "Hello." The two shake hands and she analyzes him from top to bottom. "Fiona has told me a lot about you."

"Are they good things?" he asks nervously.

Fiona smiles at him reassuringly. "Relax, Ant. You're in the clear."

Mrs. Lester nods. "You're in college, right?"

"Uh-huh. I'll be in my third year in the fall."

"What's your major?"

"Visual arts."

She nods again, this time in appreciation. "Not bad."

Fiona glances between Anthony and her mother. "Okay… well, we gotta get going. Mom, can you take a picture before you go?"

"Alright, sweetheart."

Fiona gives her phone to her mother. She loops her arm around Anthony, and the two do their best photogenic smiles to the camera. Once Mrs. Lester finishes taking the pictures, she gives the phone back to Fiona, who kisses her mother's cheeks before saying goodbye.

"I'll have her home by 11," Anthony promises Mrs. Lester.

Mrs. Lester narrows her eyes in warning. "You better."

"Mom," Fiona complains. "Don't scare Anthony."

"I'm not scaring him, honey. I'm just making sure he doesn't do anything you don't want to do."

"I'm not like that," he immediately says in defense. "I promise I'll drive Fiona straight back here as soon as prom is over."

"You better," Mrs. Lester repeats.

"Okay…" Fiona tugs on his arm. "Bye mom!"

"Bye Fiona. Have fun!"

Anthony waves at Mrs. Lester, and she closes the door as he leads Fiona to his car. To his relief, meeting Mrs. Lester wasn't as bad as he dreaded it to be. She seemed like a nice woman, even if she is supposed to be a stringent parent.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Through the window, Susan watches the two teens get into Anthony's car.

 _Enjoy your night, Anthony. Don't have any hopes of being with my daughter. There's only one boy that she's good for, and once he comes to his senses, I'll make sure that Fiona will be the one that he will be with._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Couples slow dance to One Republic's Stop and Stare under the chandeliers of a hotel's grand ballroom. Over a third of the junior class that are in the room is on the dance floor, including DJ Alex, who has joyous tears in his eyes as he's dancing with his new girlfriend Carrie, the junior vice president of the school's Key Club.

At one side of the dance floor, Zoe and Alfie are sharing their second slow dance. Close by, Louise and Matt, as well as PJ and Christy, are slow-dancing too. Alfie's feet are numb from having his toes stepped on by Zoe, but he's gratified that the toe-stepping isn't on purpose this time.

 ** _"You know, six months ago, when you agreed to one dance with me, you told me that you wouldn't dance with me again for the rest of the year. Look at us now."_**

 _ **"Things have changed, Alfs. Six months ago, I wasn't dating you."**_

 ** _"I'm glad you're mine, lady love."_**

 _ **"Dude, I'm your girlfriend, not a vase made from China."**_

 _ **"You're better than any expensive ceramic."**_

 _ **"Good. You're my dunderhead. No one is stealing you away from me."**_

On the other side of the dance floor, Dan and Phil are sharing their first slow dance in public. As the only homosexual couple at prom, they've earned several stares from the junior class when they entered the ballroom. Despite the judgmental stares, they imagine themselves as the only two people in the room. It's ignoring those that can't accept two males having a strong relationship that makes theirs different from most fickle high school relationships.

 _ **"We should've asked Alex to play our song."**_

 _ **"We have several songs, Phil. Which one are you thinking about?"**_

 _ **"Any of them. All of 'em are our songs."**_

 _ **"Wow. Most couples only have one song, but it's like we have a playlist."**_

 _ **"That's because we're not most couples. There's only one Dan and Phil."**_

 _ **"What if there's another couple somewhere in the world that are Dan and Phil too?"**_

 _ **"They're just names. No one can replicate this kind of Dan and Phil."**_

As the song reaches the second chorus, the two share a kiss.

Toward the middle of the dance floor, Anthony and Fiona are awkwardly swaying back and forth in their first slow dance together. Anthony's corsage is wrapped around Fiona's wrist, and he's treating the dance as if this is the first and last dance that they'll ever share. The words that he wants to say is at the tip of his tongue, awaiting its opportunity to be slipped into the air.

 _ **"I'm not saying this enough, but you look incredibly beautiful."**_

 _ **"Thanks, Ant. That means a lot to me."**_

 _ **"I'm serious. You're beautiful every time I see you."**_

 _ **"Aren't you Mr. Suave tonight."**_

 _ **"Well, Mr. Suave likes you. A lot."**_

Fiona melts. After all the resentment that accumulated inside her for weeks, she's happy to be complimented by a boy that she's thankful to have as a friend. "I like you too."

"Really?"

She nods. "I like knowing you'll always be here for me, so thank you for being my friend."

"You like me as your friend?"

"What else would I like you as?"

Anthony's stomach drops. He hides his disappointment with a tight smile. "Yeah, I know. That's exactly what I meant."

She pats his shoulders. "Great, because I'm done with falling in love for now."

As the song concludes, Anthony's heart crumbles in the inside. He's relieved that he didn't confess how deep his feelings for Fiona truly goes. Had he told her that he's falling for her, he would have met an outright rejection.

He was friendzoned, but as long as Fiona is unaware of his one-sided feelings, he can hope that she'll change her mind one day and fall in love with him like she did with Dan.

* * *

~:~

* * *

At midnight, Dan and Phil stand at the balcony of their apartment. Johnathan agreed to allow Dan to stay the night, as long as they don't make too much noise. "You two know exactly what noise I'm talking about." Dan and Phil were amused by Johnathan's mock warning, but promised that they won't be too loud.

Dan's gift for Phil is tucked in the inside of his pajama top. They changed out of their tuxedos as soon as they got home. They are each wearing a matching set of pajamas with a black shirt and dark blue bottoms that Dan had bought for them with his first paycheck from Dillion's.

"So where's that thing you said you had for me?" Phil asks. Dan had told him before Zoe drove him, Alfie, and Dan to prom (PJ and Louise were with their dates in the Lexus that PJ borrowed from his father) that he had a present to give to Phil after they arrived home from prom.

"Close your eyes first."

 _What the hell? Is he gonna put a spider in my hand?_ "You're not giving me something poisonous, are you?"

Dan chuckles. "I promise there's no poison involved."

Phil snaps his eyes shut, holding his hands out to Dan. "Give it to me."

"God Phil. Relax. It's not gonna bite." He hears a bit of shuffling before he feels something flat and smooth placed on one of his palms. "Be careful with that. It can break."

"Can I open my eyes now?"

"Yup."

Phil opens his eyes. Under the moonlight, his line of sight locks onto Dan's present on his palm: a CD case with a single disc inside.

"Whoa." He admires the colored sketched artwork of him and Dan on the inside front cover. Phil assumes that Alfie must have drawn it since his artistic expertise lately is human portraits (his self-portrait for his drawing and painting class had a perfect A+).

"Alfie did the drawing," Dan says, confirming Phil's assumption. "It's supposed to be a playlist of songs all about our relationship. We bonded on my first day of school because of music, so it's only fitting I give you something that'll always remind you of how our love story began."

Warmth seeps through Phil's cheeks. _A CD for me? Now that's why Dan's the best boyfriend in the world._ He flips the cover around and finds 12 songs written in pen at the back cover.

 _ **Starlight (Muse)**_

 _ **I Dare You to Move (Switchfoot)**_

 _ **All About Us (He is We & Owl City)**_

 _ **I Will Follow You into the Dark (Death Cab for Cutie)**_

 _ **Chasing Cars (Snow Patrol)**_

 _ **Yellow (Coldplay)**_

 _ **Beautiful Love (The Afters)**_

 _ **You Fill my Heart (Jason Walker)**_

 _ **A Thousand Years (Christina Perri)**_

 _ **You've Got this Hold on Me (Cassidy Ford)**_

 _ **Hulog ng Langit – it means Heaven Sent (Angeline Quinto version)**_

 _ **Pangako Sa Yo – it means I Promise You (Vina Morales version)**_

"The last two were from Louise," Dan adds. "Once you listen to it, you'll get why Louise suggested them."

Phil smiles. _Louise and her addiction to foreign TV and music._ "You did this for me?"

"Of course." Dan steps closer to Phil. "Music tells a story, and our love is a beautiful story that continues to get better every single day."

Phil clutches the CD close to his chest. He thinks back to the day that he took Dan to Dillion's for the first time and their discussion about their love for rock music. He remembers how he thought about his love for rock music being the way that he wanted to fall in love with a person. That was how he fell for Dan. He loves Dan like rock music – a love that resonates to his entire soul and shook away the barriers that surrounded his heart.

He shifts his body and tilts his head upward. The fullness and brightness of the moon is as radiant as his emotions for Dan. His life is far from perfect, but standing here with Dan gives him a piece of his life that's as close to perfection as he can get.

"I love you," he whispers. "I love you more than all the stars in the galaxy."

Dan curls his arm around Phil's waist. "I love you more than forever."

"It's impossible to promise anything forever." _Look how that turned out between Fiona. That's still my fault._

Dan grins. "Forever isn't always, but always is forever."

"So it's always and forever then."

"Always and forever," Dan agrees. "Fuck forever and always."

Phil laughs. With the CD still in his hands, Phil leans toward Dan and kisses him.

It's a new promise, and it's one that Phil vows never to turn his back against.

* * *

 **Well that was a long chapter. What did you think about the CD? God, I wish a guy would do that for me. My best friend (who I adore to the bottom of my warm, tomboyish heart) sent me a long list of song recs for my 18th birthday last year, so that's the closest I got so far. When she did it again for my 19th birthday, you have no idea how big the gear hug I gave to her was.**

 **I wanted to squeeze in OPM music in the story, so I dropped in the song that inspired this fic and the song I highly recommend you listen to in its Angeline Quinto version (the original one is by Donna Cruz). Go on Google for the English translation too so you can experience for yourself why I picked that song to go in Dan's CD.**

 **Phil's "It's impossible to promise anything forever" line came from the trailer of a teleserye called Till I Met You, which is stealing my heart atm. My heart died when James Reid made that line and I couldn't help slipping that piece of dialogue into the chapter. If you're into foreign dramas, I give a thumbs up for you to watch Till I Met You. There's a gay character in the show that reminds me of Phil and you'll love him instantly, just like I did. ;D**

 **~ AA**


	20. Schemes and a Party

Chapter 20: Schemes and a Party

Haiku

 _When you feel alone_

 _Look at the one by your side_

 _That masks his feelings_

* * *

April rolls into May. The last month of the school year goes by in a blur. While relationships progress within the group, Fiona starts to feel convinced that her choice to be away from the group has become a permanent decision. Had she been still with the group, she would have been the only person without a boyfriend or girlfriend. Even Joe, who too isn't in a relationship, has set his eyes on Miranda, the freshman girl that he danced with at the Halloween dance. Included or excluded from the group, she would have felt like an outsider no matter what.

It's the week before finals and Fiona is lounging on one of the beach chairs at Hannah's house (or mansion, since Hannah's parents are business moguls). Hannah is to her right, sipping a glass of iced tea, while Jessica is to her right, texting someone (most likely Kevin) on her phone, and Katie to Jessica's right, soaking up the mid-morning sun. Hannah, Katie, and Jessica live on the wealthier side of the city, with Hannah being the richest out of the trio. The first time that Fiona stepped foot into Hannah's home, she felt more aware of her outsider status than ever before. Luxury is at every corner of the hundreds of acres of land that Hannah's home was built on. The feeling was there when she visited Katie and Jessica's homes for the first time too, though it wasn't as uncomfortable compared to her experience with Hannah's house. Despite the several times that she has been a guest to the girls' houses, nothing takes away the fact that she's the commoner surrounded by three rich kids. No amount of clothes, makeup, or accessories will make her fit in the clique.

Hannah lowers her sunglasses and faces Fiona. "Hey, miss goody two shoes."

 _That name never gets old._ "What?"

"I'm throwing an end-of-the-school-year bash next Saturday. Wanna come?"

"Are you serious?" Fiona says flatly. For the two months that she has been around the trio, the girls never invited her to any party. Parties are a frequent topic at lunchtime, and none of them ever asked her to tag along to any of them. She wouldn't go to a party voluntarily (getting shitfaced drunk isn't something she'd want to do until she's an adult), but the least they could do is attempt to include her for their weekend activities.

"It's an honor for Hannah to even ask you," Katie speaks up. "Anyone can come, but she wanted to ask you personally."

"Uh..." _Would mom even let me go?_

"It's fine if you don't want to go," Hannah tells her with a shrug. "My parents let me have parties all the time if that's what you're worried about. They don't care as long as I tell them beforehand, we clean up afterward, and they don't hear about any pregnancies because of my parties. And you're miss goody two shoes for a reason. You're gonna be busy with your boy toys anyway."

"They're not my boy toys." Ian and Anthony are her friends, not a couple of boys that she has a threesome with. She bets Hannah or Katie would pounce at the opportunity to have their naughty ways with the two boys.

Katie sits up from her chair. "I don't care what kind of excuse you have. If you don't want to be a prude for the rest of your high school life, you should come next weekend."

Jessica puts her phone down next to her. "Tell your mom that we invited you for a sleepover so she'll let you go out."

 _Lie to mom?_ She did a good job at keeping Dan and Phil's secret relationship from her friends, but this is a different kind of lying. She's lying to do something that goes against her and her parents' morals.

"We'll be with you the entire time," Jessica assures her. "And you don't have to pick up a beer if you don't want to."

She smiles. _How can a decent girl like Jessica be friends with these two bitches?_ "I guess one party won't hurt."

Hannah grins. "Great! The party will start at 8, and you can stay for the night once it's over."

"Bring your boy toys too," Katie adds with a smirk.

 _Not my boy toys, bitch._ "I'll see what I can do." _I'll survive the party better if there's two more people there that won't make me sick to be around._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Hip-hop music pulsates across the spacious area of the first floor of Hannah's home. It's 9:45 PM and Hannah's end-of-the-year party is in full swing. Bodies grind on the area where furniture was shoved aside to make room for a makeshift dance floor. Hannah and Katie are flirting with recently graduated seniors and Jessica is making out with Kevin at a dark corner of the living room. Fiona is somewhere talking to Courtney and her friends (Courtney chose to come on her own accord). Ian and Anthony are drinking beer from a red cup, secluding themselves from the other high schoolers.

"I could have done something more productive with my Saturday night!" Ian yells to Anthony over the music.

"It could be worse!" _Video games or party? It's always video games._ If Fiona wasn't here, he would have chosen the leisure of staying at home or at Ian's house.

"Hey Anthony!" Hannah leaves the small group of seniors and sashays her way to where Ian and Anthony are. "Glad you could come."

Anthony's lips form a deliberate smile. "I couldn't say no to Fiona."

"No, huh? Are you two going out or something?"

 _I wish we were._ "We're just friends."

She smirks. "Well then. Since you're just friends," she snakes her arms around his neck, "You're free game, right?"

Ian rolls his eyes. "Hannahconda," he coughs. Anthony restrains a chuckle. Fiona's nickname for Hannah makes much more sense now that he's seeing the reason why up close.

She darts her eyes toward Ian. "What'd you say?"

Ian gives her a fake smile. "Nothing. Carry on."

"Jerk," Anthony mouths at Ian.

Hannah grinds her hips at Anthony's crotch. "C'mon then! Let's dance."

His response is a reluctant nod.

* * *

~:~

* * *

With the partygoers distracted, Katie slips away from the dance floor and to the refreshments table. She removes the bottle cap from the liter of Pepsi and pours the soft drink into a red plastic cup. Making sure no one is looking, she fishes out a bottle of beer from the cooler underneath the table. She tosses the bottle cap away and pours as much beer as she can into the cup. You're never gonna be one of us, and this will make sure of it.

She worms her way through the crowd and arrives to where Fiona, Courtney, and Shayne are.

"Fiona!" She gives Fiona her most convincing, beaming smile. "You having fun?"

Fiona nods. "Not bad for my first party."

"Great!" She motions to the cup in her hand. "You must be thirsty. Want a drink?"

"Sure." Fiona grabs the cup from her. "Thanks."

 _You're not welcome._ "Anything for a friend."

She sees Fiona take a small sip from the cup as she walks away from the group and back on the dance floor. _After tonight, you're not gonna be miss goody two shoes for much longer._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Anthony manages to get away from Hannah with an excuse to use the bathroom. Dancing with Hannah was eating jelly beans from the bean boozle challenge that he did with one of his college friends: nauseating and having no idea how to get out of the situation. There were several moments of him flinching from her "accidental" crotch grabs, almost lip kisses, and butt squeezes. If he hadn't thought of the bathroom excuse, he didn't know how much longer he could handle being with her until she forced a kiss between them. He wished that he wasn't in her vicinity so she wouldn't have seen them and approached them, but he had to be as close to Fiona as possible to make sure that nothing bad happens to her.

After several minutes spent composing himself, he finally exits the bathroom with a lighter bladder and a mission to find Ian so they can bail from the party. He's only a few steps out of the bathroom when he sees Fiona stumbling up the staircase, a glassy look in her blue eyes.

"Anthony," she slurs.

"Fuck," he mutters. _She's drunk. And she promised me she wouldn't touch a single bottle of beer._

"Yeah fuck," she giggles. "Wanna fuck, Ant?"

"I'll pass."

"That's a shame." She makes a toppling step toward him. "I bet you'd be great in bed."

 _Sex? Hah!_ He's not a virgin, but he isn't proud of the one-time hook up he had to get it over with.

"Let's get you to bed," he says. "Where's the room you're staying in?"

"Over there." She points to a room farther down the hallway. "So are we gonna have sex?"

He wraps an arm around her waist and leads her to where the guest bedroom is supposed to be. "I'm not going to take advantage of you like that, Fiona."

"Boo." She sulks, her movements in disarray as she stops him at her room. "I wanted to end the night with a bang."

He turns the doorknob and they clumsily get inside. "Trust me, Fiona. You don't need sex in your life now. Save it when you get married."

She hiccups. "That's if I even get married."

He helps her onto the bed. "How did you even get drunk in the first place?"

She flops down onto the mattress. "Katie gave me something to drink. Got a little tipsy from it. I think I had like two more of cups of it after that."

He gulps. "How much was inside the cups?"

"They were all kinda full."

He sits down on the right side of her bed, placing a pillow underneath her head. Out of all the days that she gets drunk for the first time, it had to be when he and Ian were around and he was too preoccupied (which wasn't his fault) with Hannah to notice whatever Katie did to her. _I oughta give that chick a piece of her mind._

"Don't get mad at Katie," she mumbles. "It's not her fault."

"Not her fault? I came to this damn party because I don't trust those girls. Now look what they've done to you. You're gonna be feeling this in the morning. I've had my share of hangovers and it feels like shit." His facial features creases into anger. "I don't get it, Fiona. You still hate Phil for betraying you and dating Dan. You're still angry at your friends for supporting their relationship. But you have to let it go. You chose the wrong people to be around. You despise them, yet you still hang around with them because you don't want to be alone and you're desperate to have some friends. It's been two months. Your real friends miss you. They care about you. They-" He stops his rant when he hears her sniffling. He peers down at her. Tears descend from her glazed eyes.

"No one loves me," she sniffs. "I know my friends love me, but I'm never interesting enough for a guy. All I'm good for is my pretty face. My brain is a turn-off 'cause guys know I'm smart enough to see through them. Then when Dan came, I thought I finally 'the one.'" She hiccups again. "I don't know why Dan never had friends at his old school. He's cute and he's smart. He's sweet and doesn't have to try to be cool. He's perfect. I had hope we'd end up together. Now he thinks I'm some girl that's possessive like other girls at school who have a crush on him. I thought I had a chance 'cause we're friends and stuff, but love fucks with me like it always does."

"Fiona-"

"Why won't anyone love me!" she wails.

 _I love you._ he wants to say. He swore to himself that he'd always be there for her when she told him about Johnathan and Tabitha's affair. Despite his one-sided feelings, he hadn't let his emotions stop him from being her friend. With her drunken state, the words that she's saying are thoughts that she kept in her head. As much as he's opposed to her condition at the moment, a miniscule portion of his subconscious is grateful that it took alcohol for him to learn what's truly running in her mind.

"You deserve to be loved," he says softly. "But Dan isn't the one that can give you that. When I saw Dan and Phil at Martyn's funeral, I saw the way they look at each other. That's true love." He strokes his fingers through her hair. "There's a boy out there for you. Somewhere in this world, he's waiting to meet you. Or maybe you've already met him. I don't know. There's a soulmate for everyone. Dan is Phil's. You have one too. All you have to do is be patient." _I'm right here, Fiona. I can be the one that loves you._

She doesn't speak. Upon closer inspection, he sees that her eyes are shut, her breathing steady. She had fallen asleep sometime in the duration of silence when he deliberated his response.

 _Guess I said all that for nothing._ "Sweet dreams, Fi." He maneuvers himself on the bed, allowing himself to press his lips on her forehead. _Kisses on the forehead, cheek, or kiss means friendship, right?_

"I'm gonna make this right," he whispers. She needs her real friends, and he's going to help her get them back.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Downstairs, Hannah is smirking. _Anthony, whatever it is you're doing with Fiona up there, she's no match for me. I'm gonna be the one that gets you and there's nothing that little goody two shoes can do about it._

* * *

~:~

* * *

At the exact same moment that Hannah vowed to win over Anthony, in an apartment somewhere in the city, a woman is writhing with need with a man hovering over her bare body.

 _Why do I have to love this man?_ she thinks.

He kisses her lips, ignoring guilt's echo in his head. _It's fair. She did it to me first._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Fiona wakes up the morning with an overwhelming ache in her head. She feels as if her head was pounded by a rock.

She groans. _What the hell happened last night?_

Hannah swings the door open with a bottle of aspirin in one hand and a glass of water in the other. Fiona lets out another groan. Her headache is worse now that Hannahconda is here.

"Mornin' sunshine," Hannah chirps.

"Get out," Fiona barks.

"So you did get drunk last night."

 _Don't rub it in my face, bitch._ "So what if I did?"

Hannah smirks. "Welcome to reality, miss goody two shoes." She places the items on the bedside drawer. "That'll help with the hangover. I'll see you later for breakfast."

As soon as Hannah is out of the room, Fiona sighs in relief. _Fucking hell. No more parties for the rest of high school._

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's Sunday night at the Liguori household, a day after Hannah's party. The friends sit on the floor of PJ's room, having their usual group sleepovers (minus Fiona). This time, Ian and Anthony are with them, Anthony having just told them about what happened to Fiona during the previous night.

"We need to stage an intervention," Joe declares. "Let's kidnap Fiona and bring her here next weekend."

"Whoa, hold on," Dan interjects. "We could risk jail time if we do that. My parents don't have enough money to bail me out of prison."

"Dan's right," Louise agrees. "There has to be a better way of getting Fiona to talk to us without being criminals."

Alfie looks toward Phil. "You're the head of master plans. What do you think we should do?"

"Ummm…" Phil mulls over his options. As ridiculous as Joe's idea is, he was right about something. They need to stage an intervention. They waited long enough. If Fiona won't talk to them herself, then they have to be the ones to do it themselves. How they'll do it is what they have to figure out first.

"We couldn't approach her after school, so us going directly to her house is out of the question," Zoe suggests.

"She didn't answer our texts for us to talk to her, so we can't expect her to voluntarily come on the next sleepover," Louise adds.

"We shouldn't even be here," Ian chimes in. "Fiona doesn't know Ant and I secretly talk to you. If she finds out, she's gonna be pissed with everyone in this room."

"And that's why we need a plan," PJ says. "Since we got Ian and Anthony, that makes two more people here that can help us out."

 _Wait, Peej is on to something._ "Peej, you're right. Ian and Anthony can help us."

"How?" Alfie inquires.

Phil leans back. "Ian and Anthony are the only ones that Fiona isn't mad at, so why don't we let you guys be the bait? All of us go somewhere to hang out. Ian and Anthony ask her to come hang out with them at the same place we're going, but she doesn't know we'll be there. That way, when she sees us, she can't run away because Ian and Anthony are her ride to get home."

Alfie nods. "I like what you're thinking. Where would we go?"

"Mall?"

"Too crowded," Ian disagrees. "It'd be hard to find her if she bolts."

"Carnival?"

Anthony shakes his head. "Better, but still kind of crowded."

"Beach?"

"Let's do the beach!" Alfie directly reacts. "If we get there early enough, we can find a private spot so Phil and Fiona can talk."

Zoe rolls her eyes. "You're just saying that because you want to see me in a swimsuit."

A hint of lust masks over Alfie's eyes. "Now that's something I never get tired of seeing when we go on beach trips…"

Louise giggles. "That's true. But you're right, Alfs. We can go swimming while Phil and Fiona talk. And it's been a while since we've last gone to the beach."

"The last time was last summer before Dan came," Joe points out.

Phil smiles. "I'm up for a beach trip. How about next Saturday? We can do it as an early birthday hangout for Dan."

The friends communicate their approval with nods in unison.

Phil glances toward Dan, intertwining their fingers. "What do you think?" Dan isn't the biggest fan of the beaches, and Phil doesn't want to force Dan to go if the group has to do a majority rules vote. He's a good boyfriend. He has respect for Dan's dislikes.

"I'll go," Dan tells Phil. "I can handle one day of volleyballs to the head and sand up my ass."

Phil chuckles. "I'll shield you from those balls and make sure your ass is sand-free."

Alfie beams. "We're going to the beach!" He looks at Zoe lovingly. "You still have that red bikini, lady love?"

"Perv," she replies in amusement. "Because of that, I'm wearing a one-piece."

"So you don't have it?"

"Maybe I do. Maybe I don't."

Phil inwardly laughs. They had a beach trip during the summer before they began 9th grade and Joe in 7th grade. In Zoe's attempt to look physically mature, she bought a two-piece bathing suit that Alfie dubbed "the bikini." It accentuated her breasts, causing Alfie was salivating over Zoe and for older boys to eye-fuck her during their entire time that they were at the beach. It also happened to be the first time that the boys witnessed Alfie having a barely-concealed boner, an image that Phil still cringes at to this day.

"Awesome," Joe remarks. "I could use a little tan before August."

"I still have my volleyball if you guys want to play," PJ brings up.

"Oh, you're on!"

Ian smiles. "Guess I'll hit the gym to get my bod ready for the ladies."

Anthony scoffs. "Pam's your only lady, man."

Ian's eyes glimmer with adoration. "I wish she can come."

"Next time," PJ tells Ian. "We'd love to meet some of the other friends you have."

Ian nods. "And we'll make sure to bring Fiona with us. This plan is a bust if the guest of honor isn't there."

Phil grins. Living with Johnathan with a fewer set of house rules is nice, but he misses having meals with his twin sister.

He has had enough of their two months of torturous avoidance.

In one week, their group will be back to being complete.

* * *

 **Still building on those moments with Fiona and Anthony. Out of all the pairs in the story, they're the slowest ones I'm working with.**

 **SPOOKY WEEK HAS BEGUN. *proceeds to saying exotic butters repetitively***

 **The next chapter will be kinda long and a game-changer, so brace yourself.**

 **~ AA**


	21. Beach Trips and a Crash

Chapter 21: Beach Trips and a Crash

Haiku

 _Remember this day_

 _When love isn't bittersweet_

 _And loose ends are tied_

* * *

It's the Wednesday of the first week of June. Ian, Anthony, and Fiona are hanging out at Ian's house, playing with a deck of cards until Anthony has to go to work later in the afternoon as a sales associate at Hollister. With the plan set to go into motion on the weekend of Dan's 17th birthday, the boys now have to do their part to ensure that Fiona will be at the beach.

Ian shuffles the cards in his hands. "Fiona?"

She looks up at him. "What?"

"Are you free this Saturday?"

Fiona shrugs. "Jess wants to hang, but I don't have any specific plans."

Ian puts the cards down on the table. "Great. A bunch of our friends are going to the beach on Saturday. Ant and I are wondering if you want to come?"

She gazes at him in curiosity. "What's the catch?"

"There's no catch."

She raises an eyebrow in skepticism. "I'll be the only high school chick there."

"We're sure," Anthony assures her. "Pam and Mari are excited to meet you, and I'd like to see you show David and Joshua that girls aren't noobs."

She laughs. "When you put it like that, sure!"

Ian grins. _Sorry Fi, but you'll have to wait on meeting our friends._ "Fantastic! We'll pick you up at 8."

She smiles. "Can't wait."

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's 7:45 AM on the morning of the beach trip. The seven teens are outside of PJ's house. PJ's blue Range Rover, courtesy of his uncle as a congratulations gift for getting his driver's permit, has everyone's belongings in the trunk. Alfie has also brought his motorcycle for him and Zoe to ride on since PJ's car isn't large enough to fit everyone inside.

PJ twirls his car keys in his hand. "We're all set. Ready to get the day going?"

Joe raises his fist in the air. "Beach babes, here I come!"

Dan chuckles, his hand comfortably holding Phil's. "I can't wait to see that six-pack beneath that shirt," he whispers in Phil's ear.

Phil grins, his cheeks tinting pink. "I can't wait to see yours too."

"Hey gay princes! Tone down the PDA!" PJ calls out.

"Fuck off!" Dan answers.

Alfie wraps his arms around Zoe's waist. "That's not PDA. This is PDA." He plants his lips firmly on Zoe's mouth. The kiss lasts for more than a few seconds, eliciting wolf-whistles from Louise and PJ.

"Tone down the PDA," Joe says, repeating PJ's words. "I'm too young for this."

Zoe pulls her lips away from Alfie, turning her head toward Joe. "You weren't too young when you were jerking off to dad's porn magazines."

"That doesn't count!"

"Yes it does!"

"Pictures don't move."

"Yeah, but Alfs and I don't have our private parts showing."

As Phil's witnesses the Suggs' banter in amusement, his phone vibrates in his pocket. He takes his phone out. It's a text from Anthony. **_Ian & I on our way to fetch Fiona. We'll meet u all there._**

 _This Phil master plan is about to go underway._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Fiona is riding at the backseat of Ian's car as Ian searches for a place to park at the beach's parking lot. The sky is clear and the waters shimmer from the sunlight cast above the horizon. She's looking forward to meeting the rest of Ian and Anthony's friends. Ian has mentioned Mari and Pamela several times since they've met. Anthony once talked about a party that the duo went to at their friend David's house. Plus, whoever this Joshua is, she's going to show him that she's just as good a gamer as a typical boy.

Once Ian finds a parking spot, he stops the engine of the car and looks at Fiona in the rearview mirror. "You excited?"

Nerves swirl in Fiona's stomach. She's about to officially meet Ian and Anthony's college friends. She has a doubt that they'll mock her as soon as they see her and tell her that she's too young to be with them. The people that she'll be around today are adults. She's a minor. It doesn't matter if she's only a few years younger than them. As long as she's still in high school, she's in a different world compared to them.

"Anxiously excited," she replies. "Your friends seem cool, but I'm scared they won't like me."

"They'll like you," Anthony tells her with an assuring grin. "Because if they don't, Ian and I will give them shit."

She smiles. _If they don't like me, at least I still got my boys here._

Ian opens his car door, she and Anthony follow suit. Exiting the car with their belongings, the trio leave the parking lot. Fiona lowers her perched sunglasses atop her head over her eyes. _You'll be fine, Fi. You're a Lester. Lesters don't care about what people say about them._

Her hands become clammy when she sees a familiar group of teens farther down the sandy area. They stand under three large rainbow-colored umbrellas. When they spot her and the three boys, her breath hitches as they wave and gesture for the trio to join them.

"What are you doing?" she asks Ian and Anthony in a hushed tone. "Don't go there! Where are your friends?"

"These _are_ our friends," Ian says.

"What." She yanks her sunglasses back up to the top of her head. "Don't fuck with me, Hecox. Where are your college friends?"

"Doing whatever." Ian rubs the back of his head awkwardly. "Sorry, Fiona. We're doing this for you, not for us."

"For me? What are you talking about?"

"Hi sis." Phil waves at Fiona hesitantly, then looks toward the boys. "Thank you."

Anthony steps away from Fiona. "You're welcome."

She darts her eyes between the boys. She has no idea why this is happening. "Wait. Back up." She glances back at Phil and the others. "Someone give me an explanation for this."

"It was another Phil master plan," Alfie starts. "We had to figure out a way for you and Phil to be at the same place at the same time so you two can finally talk."

"We had to tell a little lie to be certain you'd come with us," Anthony finishes. "We had to make you believe that you'd be meeting our friends at college."

"Fuckers," she mutters. _Now I have a different thing to be nervous about._

"We do intend for you to meet them," Anthony quickly says. "Today's just not that day."

She massages her temples with her middle and pointer fingers. "This is my worst nightmare come to life."

"We're your nightmare? I thought that was Hannahconda," Joe retorts.

Dan punches Joe's shoulder. "Dude!"

"What? It's true!"

"We succeeded in getting Fiona here. Let's not ruin that," Dan tells Joe through clenched teeth.

Fiona huffs. "I'm not staying here. I'm going home."

"You can't." Ian twirls his car keys in on his pointer finger. "We're your ride home and we're not leaving till you talk to them."

"This is so unfair!"

"Life is unfair. Deal with it."

She glares at the two older boys, crossing her arms over her chest. "I'll only talk to Phil if you take me home before noon."

"Fiona-"

"That's my offer. Take it or leave it."

"Are we seriously doing this?"

 _Well duh._ "I'm trying to compromise. Now do we have a deal?"

Ian hesitates with his response. She can see the conflict in his eyes. _It doesn't matter if you say no, Ian. I have money in my wallet. I can take a bus home._

Ian puts his keys back into the pocket of his shorts. "Fine. But you're buying us lunch later."

* * *

~:~

* * *

Tension is in the air as the friends, now in their swimsuits, scatter through different places of the beach, leaving Phil and Fiona to sit on blankets beneath the beach umbrellas that Louise and PJ had set up. Zoe and Alfie wandered by the coast, their feet splashing each other with the water. Louise and PJ are playing volleyball against Ian and Anthony. Dan and Joe are sitting cross-legged on a blanket, sunglasses over their eyes as they watch their friends' game.

"I wish I was good at sports," Dan comments. Binge-watching sports-related anime has made him interested in joining team sports. If he didn't have his butterfingers or he isn't a klutz in general, he would have wanted to join the game in a 3 vs. 3 match. Unfortunately, if he was the one that had to serve, he would either be that annoying player that accidentally aimed the ball at the back of his teammate's head or be the failure of a player that can't even get the ball over the net.

"Everyone sucks at something. You know how much I suck at math," Joe says.

 _I'd trade sucking at math to have the decent ability of kicking, throwing, or hitting a ball with my bare hands._ "Who doesn't?"

"People who don't know how to have fun."

Dan chuckles. This is the first time that he's having a one-on-one conversation with the younger Sugg. Since Dan's first day of school, he viewed Joe as more of a 16 or 17-year-old than a 14-year-old. Joe's age is the only difference that he has with the rest of the group. He acts more maturely than an arrogant freshman (or sophomore in the upcoming school year). He doesn't act as if he owns the school. He behaves like a typical teen, minus being pressured to drink or smoke (sex always remains to be an interest to any male teen).

"I'm smart and know how to have fun," Dan muses.

Joe beams. "And that's why you're one of us. We love you. Phil loves you."

Dan's face grows warm. "Oh stop it."

"It's true." Joe uncrosses his legs, bringing his knees up to his bare chest. "I still don't get why you didn't have friends at your old school. You're super cool."

"It's not that I didn't have any friends," Dan clarifies. "There were these two siblings, Barry and Bryony, I'd eat lunch with and go to their house sometimes. But we weren't really close. I haven't spoken to them since I moved." He mirrors Joe's new sitting position. "I chose to be friendless. Most people back home didn't care about being book smart. If you were a geek, you were uncool. If you were uncool, you're an easy target to be picked on. All my classmates knew me as the kid desperate for attention. I was the nerd with the good looks, but my nerdiness overshadowed my looks. It's hard being a loner, but I'd rather have a friend I'd trust my life with than being around a bunch of people that aren't my true friends. Honest, I was excited when my dad told me we were moving. There wasn't anyone back home I'd miss and I had that hope that my new school would be a place where I could meet people like me."

Joe grins. "And you did. The heavens blessed Phil with a boyfriend and me with a friend that I can relate to."

"Relate to? In what way?"

"Well, I was a bit of an outcast before I was friends with Peej, Alfs, and Phil."

"I didn't know that." Dan is intrigued by the prospect of hearing Joe's childhood. He doesn't know too much about what Joe experienced as a child, other than how Joe is as close to Zoe as Phil is with Fiona.

Joe smiles wistfully. "Now you do."

"If you were an outcast, how did you and the guys become friends?"

"It's a long story."

"I've got time." The volleyball match doesn't seem to be ending anytime soon, it would be rude to intrude on the Zalfie moments in the water, and the twins need as many minutes as possible to talk things out.

"Alrighty." Joe lies back on the blanket. "This is what happened.

"Since I was born, Zoe has looked after me. She was the kind of protective older sister that didn't want anything bad to happen to me. She always let me play with her and snuck snacks from the pantry when our mom wasn't looking. Once she met Louise and Fiona in kindergarten, she insisted that I'd have to be their friend too if they wanted her to hang out with them. But they didn't mind. They didn't treat me like a third wheel. I was as much a part of their little group as Zoe.

Of course, being around girls all the time made boys think I was gay when I finally went to school. Keep in mind that I was five and the only friends I had my entire life were girls that were older than me. Because the girls were two grades above me, they couldn't defend me anywhere other than where we had recess and when we weren't at school. For three years, I prayed to have some guy friends to go along with my girl friends. Louise and Fiona were like my extended sisters, but I wanted to have one boy around my age that could be like a brother.

I wanted that from Phil. Back then, the girls and the guys were their own groups. Phil would hang out with the girls sometimes, and I learned he was just as sweet and caring as the girls in his own male way. He was always with Alfie and PJ, who I saw around school and seemed just as nice as Phil, even if Zoe always said that he was her best friend's brother's friend who vied for her romantic affection." Joe pauses with a chuckle. "That was what I liked about Alfie. He knew what love was as a little child and his feelings were never borderline obsessive.

Anyway, I was in 3rd grade when they really noticed me. It was a lunch recess in November and I was sitting down taking a break after playing tag with the girls. The girls were still playing when these four boys approached me. They were 5th graders like Zoe and I heard they were pretty popular among their year. I was alone, so they asked me if I wanted to join them. I told them that I was fine, but they kept encouraging me, telling me I'll be too bored for the rest of recess.

Hanging out with girls taught me how to know what kids I should trust, and those boys were the kind of people I knew I shouldn't be with. But this was something that never happened to me before. No boy has ever asked me to play with them. If I passed up their request, I could be missing out on an opportunity to make some guy friends, even if they were bad. As long as I had the girls as my friends, the good would balance out the bad, you know? So I agreed. They were happy with my answer, but one of the boys, the ringleader of the group, told me I had to do something first before I could be with them. All I had to do was climb high up a tree. It was their way of testing me if I'm a man.

I should've said no. I could get hurt and Zoe would never let me hear the end of it. But what did I do? I climbed that tree. I had to prove to these guys that just because I have female friends doesn't mean I can't be a boy. So I climbed that tree. I climbed that tree to the highest branch. When I got to the top, I felt invincible. I felt like I could do anything. I was the happiest I've ever been. And then I looked down and saw those four guys gone.

My happiness was rapidly replaced by fear. I didn't realize I was so high up. I was scared I'd slip when I climbed down and break a bone. I started crying and realizing I was so stupid to let my desperation for male friends get me to that point. I stayed stuck atop that tree for a while, all the way till after the bell rang. I thought I'd be stuck there forever until I heard my name being called. When I looked back down, I saw Phil, PJ, and Alfie standing at the bottom. They questioned why I was up there. I told them about my predicament, and man, you should've seen how pissed PJ was. He wanted to hunt after those guys and beat them up. But Phil held him back and said what mattered more was getting me down.

The three of them talked me out of my fear. They told me they'd be there to catch me if I fell. One careful look at them and I could see the sincerity in their faces. I gave them my trust and slowly climbed back down. They had their arms stretched out in case I did slip. I didn't, and when my feet touched the ground, I immediately thanked them for being there. I apologized for making them late to class, but they told me they didn't mind getting a tardy. They had wanted to give me a helping hand. It would be foolish of them to leave me there for the rest of the school day.

PJ told my homeroom teacher what happened and those four boys were given a warning by the principal. They apologized for their actions and didn't bother me again for the rest of the school year. As for Phil, PJ, and Alfie, they walked me home after school on that day. I ended up telling them my personal reason for climbing the tree – all I longed for was at least one male friend in my life. I thought they'd tell me stuff like 'you'll find that friend one day.' But no. They asked me if they could be those male friends for me. I thought they were doing it out of pity, but Alfie swore that after the incident, they couldn't bear to see me let me do something stupid again in an effort to make friends. Phil followed up by confessing that if it wasn't for Zoe and my age, he would've tried to befriend me a long time ago. And PJ added on to what Phil said, telling me I was much better to be around than other boys in their year.

I was touched. I couldn't believe the guys I looked up to genuinely wanted me to be their friend. I told them yes, and since then, we've been the best of friends. Fiona and Louise were glad they took me in. Zoe was a bit annoyed that it meant I'd be spending more time with Alfie. I grew closer with Phil, PJ, and Alfie over the several months, and by the time they graduated from elementary school, I saw them as older brothers rather than friends. Spending a lot of time with the boys gradually brought the girls and the boys. Our groups fused and I had the best of both worlds. By the time I was in middle school, the people in my year stopped teasing me and became envious because I had older friends.

My friends mean so much to me because they showed me that age shouldn't define friendship. Two years isn't a huge age gap. It's a bonus they were good influences. Because of them, I didn't become a troublemaker. I learned to ignore what people think of me and to always choose school over sex. It's why I really want Fiona and Phil to make up. Fiona's absence for the last several weeks left a hole in our hearts. Fiona and I are the only ones without a significant other, not counting PJ since we can all tell Christy likes him too, though he's chicken to say anything. But I'm fine without love because the love from you guys is all I need to be happy. I just hope Fiona can let go of her discouragement and be the same."

Dan listened attentively and stayed silent throughout Joe's story. As the younger Sugg spoke further through his backstory, Dan understood why Joe cared a lot about their friends. The two of them are more alike than he thought. Joe knew how it feels to be different than his peers, yet powered through his inner demons and gradually found the right people in his life to be his friend.

"You're wise beyond your years," Dan tells Joe.

Joe sits back up. "'Tis better to be wise than a high motherfucker."

Dan laughs. _That's why I love these guys._

* * *

~:~

* * *

While Joe opened up to Dan about his past, Phil and Fiona are initially slow to jumpstart the flow of their conversation. Before their sibling fight, choppy conversations were far and few. Awkward conversations is a territory that Phil isn't used to doing with his twin. Their conversations are usually seemingly endless. Between the two of them, long durations of silence is unheard of.

"How have you been?" Phil starts. Fiona was an expert at avoiding him, both at home and at school. He saw her less once he moved in with Johnathan and she began hanging out with Hannah.

"Good."

"How's mom?"

"Good."

"Are you keeping up with schoolwork?"

"Yes."

"You want to go swimming?"

"Later."

He sighs. Her one-word answers aren't getting him anywhere. "How's it like hanging out with Hannahconda?"

Her mouth forms a mix between a grimace and a smile. "What do you think?"

He smiles. _That's better._ "She's still a devil up close?"

Her grimace disappears, leaving behind a hint of a smile. "She's more than a devil. She's hell herself."

He chuckles. "Is it like that with Katie and Jessica too?"

"Katie. Not Jess. She's okay."

"Jessica doesn't give you a hard time?"

"She's the most human out of the three."

 _At least one of them isn't too bitchy than I thought._ "How do you handle being around them if you hate them?"

"I don't." She removes her sunglasses and drops it in front of her. "They snark at me, I snark right back. Katie likes to rile me up, so she does it as much as she can."

"And that doesn't make you want to start a catfight?"

"I have some self-control."

He likes where this is going. This is the most they've spoken to each other since their friends found out about his and Dan's relationship.

"Fi, while you're still here, I'm tremendously sorry about what I've done to you." She turns her head to look at him, and he continues. "I'm sorry I didn't keep our promise. I'm sorry I didn't put you first over me. I'm sorry I couldn't restrain from my feelings. I fell in love with your crush and stole him away from you without meaning to. You went through all that hurt alone and you were forced to spend your time with people you loathed the most. Love almost tore our parents apart, and I feel horrible for letting love be the same feeling that came between us. I don't like fighting with you, and I hate being physically and emotionally distant from you for the last two months."

Every muscle strains in his body strains as he waits for her reaction. Her silence makes him worried. What if his apology is all for nothing and she's unable to forgive him? What if his relationship with Dan means giving up his close relationship with his sister? He doesn't want to have to choose between two people that he loves. He doesn't know what to do if it comes down to a "one or the other" decision.

"I still don't like you and Dan together," she remarks following a few minutes of the silence.

He nods. He didn't expect her to make a complete turnaround regarding her opinions about Phan.

"I haven't entirely forgiven you too," she proceeds. "I still like him, maybe might even be in love with him. I don't know. But I do know it's pointless to stay mad at you forever. Dan loves you. There's nothing I can do to change that. I'm not 100% accepting of you two as a couple, but I don't want to stand in your way. I don't have any intentions of breaking you two apart."

Hope fills his chest. "So… does that mean I can go back home?"

The corners of her mouth lifts up slightly. "Why not, bro."

He beams. These are words from Fiona that he waited weeks to hear. Without hesitation, he twists his body and lunges toward Fiona to give her a hug.

"I've missed you so much, sis."

He can feel her mouth form a full-out smile. "I've missed you too, Phil."

* * *

~:~

* * *

Meanwhile, after about a half hour swimming in the water, Zoe and Alfie are treading back to shore, water droplets sliding down their bodies and onto the sand. The couple are holding hands, heading back to where Phil and Fiona are.

"No more playing tag in the water," Zoe says, using her unoccupied hand to squeeze water out of her hair. "You almost drowned me."

Alfie laughs. "Maybe I should have. It would've given me an excuse to give you CPR."

She swats his shoulder playfully. "You can kiss me whenever you want now, dunderhead. You don't need an excuse."

"Can you kiss me right now?"

"Haven't we kissed enough in the water?"

He grins. "I'm never tired of Zoe kisses."

 _And I'm never tired of Alfie kisses._ "I'm in the mood for drawing," she declares, changing the topic. She has her sketchbook in her bag and her hands are itching to draw a beach scene.

"Me too!" Alfie says. "It's a good thing you brought it up. I was wondering if I could draw you."

"Again? You drew me yesterday when I was at your house."

"I want to draw you like this." He ogles her body. "Wet, half-naked, and gorgeous."

She hits his shoulder again, this time harder and a little less playfully. "Don't say that out loud. Guys might think you're talking about something totally different." As if on cue, she catches a man in his 20's stare at her and wink suggestively. "Yeah, tone down the double innuendo when there aren't many guys in close range."

He chuckles. "Don't worry, lady love. I'll beat up any guy that tries to steal my girl."

She leans the side of her body closer to him. _He's never beaten up anyone, but it's the thought that counts._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Ian leaves Anthony with the keys to his car at 12 PM. He called Mari to take him back home so he can get changed and report in time for work at 1:00. Now that Fiona is in better terms with Phil, she decided to take back what she said earlier and stay with the group until they head back home later in the afternoon.

Fiona talks to the rest of the group while they eat Louise's homemade sandwiches during lunch at 12:30. She apologizes for leaving them for Hannah, Katie, and Jessica and vows that her only friends are the people that she's spending today with.

"Apology accepted!" Alfie tells her with a mouthful of an egg salad sandwich.

"You're forgiven," Zoe seconds, then nudges her elbow against Alfie's hip. "And don't talk with your mouth full."

Alfie swallows the sandwich's contents. "Sorry, _mom_."

"Don't call me mom. This isn't a mommy kink," Zoe retorts.

"Is there such thing as a mommy kink?" Louise pipes in.

Joe grabs a slice of apple from the large container containing various slices of fruit. "There's porn for everything, so I wouldn't be surprised."

Dan groans. "You're not wrong about that. I'm still clearing my head of inhumane uses of a whisk."

PJ smirks. He and Alfie were the ones that found said porn video and showed it to Dan and Joe to see how far their minds can handle the raunchier side of porn. "You're welcome, buddy."

Fiona grins at the exchange. _How did I go this long without this?_

* * *

~:~

* * *

At 3 PM, Dan and Phil stroll along the edge of the beach's waters. Their arms are curled around each other's waists. Their cotton shirts are unbuttoned, letting the sun's rays reflect on their bare chests. Dan refused to go swimming to avoid an appearance of his hobbit hair, and Phil didn't care about giving up swimming altogether. The beach isn't the Bermuda Triangle. It's not going anywhere anytime soon. He can go swimming the next time the group goes on another beach trip.

"I was right. You do have a brilliant six-pack," Phil muses, eying Dan's abdomen.

"You must be thinking about someone else," Dan retorts.

"I'm serious! I still have no idea what I did to deserve you."

Dan smiles. "I love you because you're my sweet, straight-A, Muse-loving, Philly."

Phil smiles back. "And you're my sarcastic, all-so-fun, butterfingering Hobbit Hair."

"Oh stop it, you." Dan presses his lips to Phil's neck. "We're made for each other. I'm happy destiny brought us together."

Phil's hand tickles Dan's hip. "Are you saying I'm born for you?"

Dan snickers, recalling Louise's newest foreign TV show addiction. "Yes, and you were born for me."

"It's such a random world, but _this_ ," Phil turns his head to meet Dan's eyes, "This is clearly meant to be."

"Exactly." Dan halts his footsteps. "What we have is something the world can't take away." He brings his arm away and steps away from Phil. Phil gazes at Dan curiously, and he watches as Dan kicks off the black slipper to his left foot. Using his toe, Dan traces a heart into the sand, followed by his and Phil's name.

Phil rushes over to Dan's side. He reads what Dan traced on the sand. "Dan + Phil." He shakes his head in amusement. "You are so corny."

"Am I?" Dan puts his slipper back on and moves to stand in front of Phil. He grabs his boyfriend's hands with his. "Remember what I told you during prom night? 'Forever isn't always, but always is forever.' What I wrote in the sand will eventually be washed away, but before then, it has already left its mark. That's what we are. You've left a mark in my heart, and even when the tides carry it away, the memory of it can't ever be erased."

"Dan, are you in 'going deep' mode again?" Phil chastises.

Dan laughs. "A little. But it makes me remember that we should never take what we have for granted. We're together now, but you never know if there's a day if we're ever torn apart. I just want you to know that if we're ever separated, I'll always love you. You, Phil Lester, are my one and only."

Phil glances down at their names surrounded by the heart. "I'll never let you go, but only if you promise not to fade away."

Dan grins, thinking how the lyrics from Starlight is fitting to where they are now and their relationship as a whole. _You are my always, Phil. You are what I wish forever can be. "_ We are written in the stars. The powers of the universe conspired to make you mine, and I'm blessed you're born for me."

"Oh god, let's stop with the song puns." Phil touches his forehead against Dan's. "But you are the one that does electrify my life."

* * *

~:~

* * *

They sing along to Ariana Grande's Dangerous Woman, the radio set to their city's local pop and hip-hop station. It's 4:15 PM and PJ is driving the group back to their homes, his car currently along a deserted road. Louise is sitting in the passenger seat with the window at her car seat open. Dan, Phil, and Joe sitting in the backseats, Joe facing the window to avoid witnessing Dan and Phil kiss (he didn't mind the kissing, though he has seen enough kissing from Zoe and Alfie for the day). Zoe and Alfie are coming close behind on Alfie's motorcycle, and Ian's car is several feet behind Zoe and Alfie with Anthony driving him and Fiona.

Unbeknownst to the friends, a man wearing a black hoodie is driving a car toward PJ's vehicle. As his car drives closer to PJ's vehicle, a female voice speaks from the walkie-talkie on the passenger seat.

"Where are they?"

"I'm getting close," the man replies.

"Don't mess this up."

"Yes, 'mam."

The man presses his heel on the gas pedal, increasing the car's speed.

The five teens in PJ's vehicle are all smiles when PJ notices the car coming their way. He notice the instant lane-switch of the unknown vehicle.

"Peej! Is that dude drunk or something? Get out of the way!" Joe exclaims.

"I can't! We might get pulled over," PJ responds.

"There's no cop cars around!" Louise says, panic evident in her voice. "Break a law to save our lives, Peej!"

"But-"

"WATCH OUT!" Dan shouts.

PJ rotates the steering wheel. Their car swerves to the left.

The one motion of the steering wheel is one 360 degree rotation too much.

PJ loses control of the car. Screams echo in the inside. In a split second, the car drives off the side of the road, hitting a light post and flipping upside down.

The screams cease.

The hooded man in the other vehicle drives his car back into the right lane.

* * *

 ***cue dramatic music* Bet you didn't see that coming.**

 **I was meaning to reveal Joe's backstory about how he became a part of the group, and I finally got to it in this chapter. I thought about doing as some sort of pre-IPY outtake, but it made more sense for me to just let Joe tell it to Dan in the main story.**

 **Who else sucks at sports? I used to be pretty decent in basketball, but now I suck really bad. And as for volleyball, don't EVER make me play. I can't serve and I'll cower away if the ball is coming toward me. Idk how I survived PE when volleyball was a necessity hahah.**

 **The song that Dan and Phil were referring to is Born for You by David Pomeranz. It's the theme song to a teleserye of the same name that ended a couple months ago. I thought that the song is another good representation of their relationship, so I went ahead and slipped it into the chapter.**

 **~ AA**


	22. Critical Conditions and a Coma

Chapter 22: Critical Conditions and a Coma

Haiku

 _A twist in a tale_

 _A failure of intentions_

 _With untimed woe_

* * *

Alfie's motorcycle screeches to a halt. Anthony parks Ian's car to the side of the road. Their shock lasts for a few seconds until the panic kicks in.

"PHIL!" Fiona shrieks as she and Anthony rush out of their car.

Alfie yanks off his helmet and leaps off of his motorcycle. "FUCK! SOMEONE CALL FOR HELP!"

Zoe immediately takes out her phone from the front pocket of her jean shorts. "On it."

As Zoe dials the emergency number, the friends dash over to PJ's car, stopping a few feet away.

"Holy shit…" Anthony whispers. Fragments of glass shards litter on the dusty, deserted area at the side of the road. From the inside, they see Dan, Phil, Louise, PJ, and Joe in various states of injury. All of them seem unconscious until Phil's eyes flutter open.

Fiona attempts to run up to PJ's car, but Anthony grabs her wrists and holds her back. "Ant! Let me go!"

"I don't want you to get hurt!" Anthony answers.

"An ambulance should be here soon," Zoe says, her phone pressed to her ear. "Yes… yes. Okay. Please get here quick." As soon as she ends the call, she throws her arms around Fiona's neck.

Tears stream down Fiona's cheeks. She exhales raspy breaths. A panic attack is about to set in.

Zoe whispers soothingly to Fiona. Anthony and Alfie blink back their own tears.

All they can do is survey the carnage in silence.

* * *

~:~

* * *

The parents of the injured teens are in hysterics. Every adult broke down when they received the call that their children were in an accident.

It's nearly 6 PM and Susan sits in the waiting room at the hospital with Fiona. Her face looks as if she has seen a headless ghost. _This can't be happening… this can't be happening… not my babies..._ She has already lost one son. She can't lose the other.

Fiona touches her mother's arm. Susan blinks and peers down at her daughter.

"Phil will be okay," Fiona murmurs. "He's strong. There's no reason for God to torture us again this soon."

Unable to speak, Susan nods in response.

Tabitha and Adrian walk through the double doors, followed by Johnathan. It was a coincidence that the two of them arrived at the hospital at the same time. They spoke for a couple of minutes outside the parking lot before they headed inside. Simon is in the middle of a court case, so he'll be dropping by as soon as he gets off from work.

Fiona jumps up from her seat. "Dad! Mrs. Howell!"

"Where's Dan?" Tabitha pants. "I got here as soon as he can."

"He's in the ER," Fiona tells her. "So are Phil, Louise, Joe, and PJ."

"Are they…?"

"We don't know yet."

Susan narrows her eyes, watching her daughter and Tabitha's conversation. _They came here together. She better not have been with him beforehand._ "Well, well. We meet again."

Tabitha shifts her gaze toward Susan. "Hello, Susan."

"I don't need your pleasantries." Susan rolls her eyes, then stands up. "How long were you with my husband?"

"We ran into each other at the parking lot," Johnathan answers for Tabitha. "Susan, nothing happened, so do me a favor and mind yourself."

"I don't need you to tell me what to do," Susan snaps. "This accident is partly her fault anyway. Her damn family is the bringer of bad luck. If her son wasn't in that car, maybe this wouldn't have happened."

"Mom, stop it," Fiona says in a hushed tone. "It's no one's fault that the accident happened."

"Your daughter is right," Tabitha agrees. "I don't wish to fight with you. What matters is that our sons and their friends will be okay."

 _Speak for yourself, husband-stealer._ "You win this time."

"This isn't a battle," Johnathan warns.

 _It is to me._ "Whatever."

She averts her eyes away from Tabitha and Johnathan and sits back down on the chairs.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Several minutes before midnight, a group of men stand in front of a woman at one of the men's house. She has her arms crossed over her chest and she's glaring at the five men. _Wade hired such a worthless bunch!_

"You failed me," she tells them in a monotone voice. "You had one simple task, and what did you do? People got hurt. People nearly died."

"Sorry madam," the men mumble apologetically.

"Sorry isn't enough!" she hisses. "You better make sure you clean up the mess you made."

"Nothing will be traced back to us, madam," a man with a bald head vows.

She stomps closer to the men. "Good, because if the police come after me, I will kill you. Understand?"

"Yes, madam," the men pledge.

She glances at the man in the middle. "Wade, I'll call you for the next phase."

"Affirmative."

She nods. "You may all go."

* * *

~:~

* * *

In two separate hospital rooms, two boys lie in deep slumber on their hospital beds. A physician's diagnosis of their conditions is much more serious than their family and friends expected.

Head trauma. Brain hemorrhages. A possibility of memory loss.

In Phil's room, Fiona is holding her brother's hand, peering down at him sadly. It's 10 AM on a Sunday, nearly 18 hours since the accident. The Lesters and the Howells were told the news last night before they returned home. They were in disbelief over how critical the accident left the two male teens.

PJ, Louise, and Joe had more body injuries compared to Dan and Phil. Among the three of them, they each had a few broken bones and stiches to their faces and heads. Their bodies ache all over, though to their relief, bone injuries are faster to heal than psychological injuries. Their doctors are set to discharge them within the next few days or early next week.

The same can't be said for Dan and Phil. The two boys suffered more than just body injuries. In addition to their broken bones, the impact of the accident affected their brains too. They are stuck in comas, and no one has any idea when or if they'll wake up.

"I'm so stupid," Fiona whispers. "I know the doctor said that comas are supposed to be a way for brains to heal, but what if you don't wake up? What if I hadn't forgiven you when the accident happened? I could've let my anger and stubbornness swallow me up whole. If you… if you died, you would've died without knowing how much I love you."

A tear slides down her cheek. _Don't go, Phil. Don't die on me. You can't leave me like this. You can't leave Dan like this._ She chokes back a sob. _Dan… how did the two boys that I care so much about both end up like this?_ For a moment, the small amount of resentment that she has toward Dan disappears. She wouldn't be able to bear it if she lost both her brother and her crush. She still likes Dan as much as she did before she learned that he loves Phil. Dating Phil didn't change Dan's personality; in fact, Phil seemed to have made Dan more of a better person. Dan is happier whenever he's with Phil, and it's the type of happiness that she can't give to the brunette.

In Dan's room, Tabitha has paid a visit to Dan herself. She's sitting on the chair adjacent to the bed, frowning at the multiple bruises on her son's face. Adrian is playing basketball at the park's courts with his friends, but he gave his word to drop by at the hospital in the afternoon.

"This must be my punishment," she says, scolding herself. "This is the consequence I get for defying my wedding vows. I vowed to be a good wife to Simon and a good mother to you and Adrian, and I couldn't do that." _This is what I get for loving Johnathan. Loving him destroyed his family, and in return, this is God's way of destroying my own at a worse price._

"Keep fighting, Dan," she whimpers. "No matter how much I love your boyfriend's father, the love I have for you surpasses that."

* * *

~:~

* * *

Meanwhile, Zoe and Alfie are sitting on Louise's bed in her hospital room. The two of them are painting Louise's nails; Zoe on her toes and Alfie on her fingers. Matt is a counselor of a camp for the summer, so he couldn't come to visit Louise when he learned about her hospitalization. He did, however, gave her a heartfelt "get better soon" phone call and promised to make it up to her as soon as he returned home.

Louise darts her eyes between the couple. "You guys didn't have to do this for me. My fingers and toes can stay naked for a while."

"We're doing this 'cause we want to." Alfie finishes painting Louise's pinkie and moves on to her ring finger. "Don't think we're doing this out of obligation."

"Obligation or not, I'm taking hours away from Zalfie time."

"Zalfie time can wait," Zoe says. "Best friend time is just as important as boyfriend time."

"That's right," Alfie agrees. "Lady love and I are the lucky ones that didn't get a scratch on ourselves."

"Good thing. You two just got together and you don't need to spend a chunk of your summer smelling chlorine." Louise slightly winces as she exhales a breath. She has a couple of broken ribs, so the thoracic area of her body occasionally hurts when she lets out breaths that lasts for longer than a few seconds.

Zoe sighs. What if it had been Alfie that lost control of his motorcycle? It could have been the two of them lying in pain in the hospital bed. They could be Dan and Phil, unable to open their eyes and no one knowing for sure if they'll ever see the sun shine again. It's a miracle that she, Alfie, Fiona, and Anthony were safe in their modes of transportations. If the surviving four were the people driving in front, any of them would have been the people in Dan, Phil, Louise, PJ, and Joe's position.

"'There is always a light at the end of every tunnel,'" Alfie says, quoting the sentence from Martyn's goodbye letter. "I think this is a light at that tunnel. We could've been killed in that accident, but we're still breathing. We still have arms, legs, and beating hearts."

Louise's mouth forms a small smile. "Don't forget all the other organs in our bodies."

 _And our souls, because there are some people in the world that don't have one._ "Guess we all escaped death."

"Almost all of us," Alfie corrects. "We're still not sure what's gonna happen with Dan and Phil."

Alfie's words puts a frown on the trio's faces. The male couple are the unlucky ones. _Why do all the bad things happen to those two?_ It has been a whirlwind of events between Dan and Phil. Unlike her and Alfie, whose love was only delayed because of her stubbornness to realize her feelings for Alfie, Dan and Phil's love is restrained because of their families. Had the affair not develop between Tabitha and Johnathan, their relationship would have faced less difficulties.

Zoe puts the cover back on the bottle of nail polish. She places it on the small table where patients' meals and medicine are placed, then throws her arms around Alfie's neck.

"Whoa." Alfie is startled by Zoe's sudden action. "What's that for?"

"It's for a lot of things."

He sets his bottle of nail polish aside too. "Such as?"

She sighs. "For one, because I love you."

"I love you too. What else?"

"Well…" She touches her nose against his chin. "Because when I think about us, I realized we had so many chances to be together and I wasted it all because I refused to see what all our friends have been telling us for years. We're young and in love, but it's not the kind of love that can easily disappear. We're in the never-lasting HEA of our love story."

"You'll always be my happy ending, lady love. I'll always choose love."

Louise quietly watches Zoe and Alfie's conversation with a huge grin on her face. A year ago, Zoe would have been appalled if she learned that Alfie is her future boyfriend. Now, she wouldn't know what to do without him. He's the only one that can annoy her in the best way possible.

"Never take love for granted," Louise speaks up. "Love is like school: it can't be taken away from you as long as you fight for it no matter how hard it gets."

Alfie hugs Zoe closer to him. "Not everyone can find the love of their life in high school, but I found mine since we were little munchkins."

Zoe chuckles. "Stop it, you. I'm the girl and I'm supposed to be the cheesy romantic."

"What? A guy can't be just as much as a hopeless romantic as a girl?"

"He can, but for once, let me outdo you in the love department."

Louise giggles. "Pagka't ang tulad mo ay minsan lang sa buhay ko."

Zoe's eyes widen. "What the fuck did you just say?"

Louise giggles again. "Doesn't it sound familiar? It's Pangako Sa Yo!"

"Oh…" she says, recalling the song recommendation that Louise gave to Dan while he had created his playlist for the CD that he gave to Phil. "What does that mean again?"

"It means something along the lines of 'Someone like you is rare to find in my life,'" Louise tells Zoe.

Alfie laughs. "Dammit, Lou. All your overseas music always beats my romantic lines."

"It's Asia, Alfs. Asians have more heart than most people." Louise waggles her eyebrows. "It's true though. What you are to each other is a rare person to have in your life."

 _Oh, Alfie is rare all right._ "Alright, let's agree that love is the most wonderful emotion in the world and it's the feeling that not only makes our lives so much better, but will be what gets Dan and Phil out of their comas."

"Right," Alfie and Louise reply in unison.

That's what love is. In times of sorrow and misfortune, love is the solution that will benefit everyone.

* * *

~:~

* * *

That night at the hospital, PJ lies awake in his room. His mind keeps replaying his last conscious minutes before he blacked out when he lost control of his car. There's something about the unknown driver in the other vehicle that bothers him.

 _That man… he didn't look drunk. I don't think he was_. If he was, that car would've been all over the place. He had seen drunk drivers on the road before. He can tell the difference between a driver in alcoholic influence and a driver that's completely sober.

There seemed to have been purpose when the man switched lanes. It was as if he knew that PJ and his friends were in their car and had intended to lead them to their deaths. It's almost as if the man wanted the accident to happen.

 _Okay… so what if that man had wanted to kill us?_ _What kind of prejudice does he hold against us?_ PJ isn't aware of anyone that hates him or his friends that much to have a desire to murder them. They've never gotten into a fight with anyone at school, and he's the one that's capable of punching someone's jaw. There may be jocks that tease them from time to time, but their mocking words has never led them to fight back.

He groans. Perhaps his worry is all in his head. Maybe that man could have been high or sleepy and couldn't see the road clearly. His paranoia is causing him to seek for someone to blame. He should be getting some rest instead of thinking about the reason why he's in the hospital.

"Stop it Peej," he mumbles. "No one's out to get you. No one wants to see you dead." Reality is nowhere similar to TV dramas (even if Tabitha and Jonathan's affair was a drama-like moment). He's a typical teenager attending a normal high school and is free from drug gangs. The chances of being targeted by some hit man is as likely as him able to spend 24 hours without using his cell phone.

This is real life.

That criminal is most likely non-existent.

What he needs to be more concerned about is having his skin and bones back to a healthy state before school starts.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Days pass. Friends and family come to visit as often as they can during their free time. Louise, PJ, and Joe are discharged from the hospital by the end of the week, each of them wearing casts and using crutches. Dan and Phil remain in comatose states, and despite being unable to see, their ears can hear every word that their loved ones say to them when their minds are conscious.

For Phil, he can recognize every voice that speaks to him. For Dan, however, his mind is a different story. While everyone is locked onto their hope for the boys to wake up, they are unaware of the turmoil occurring in Dan's head.

At first, his mind is similar to Phil's. He's ecstatic whenever he hears the familiar voices of his friends and family. Their constant words of encouragement motivates him to wake up. But as the days wear on, the voices slowly start to dissolve into a mess. The faces associated to every voices gradually fades. Memories slip away. The bonds that he had with the people he has come to know over the last several months become unrecognizable.

He sobs internally as images of Phil diminishes.

The concert. The log cabin. Their first "I love you." Telling Fiona the truth about their relationship. The beach trip. The ultimate crash.

 _No… no… no..._ he cries. _Not my Philly. Please no. God, don't do this to me. He has my heart. We're supposed to have a future together. I promised him… I promised our always for forever. I love him… I love him… I love you… Phil…_

It's Phil's name that loops as a mantra in his head before the last memory of his beloved boyfriend disappears.

* * *

~:~

* * *

At 8:35 AM on the 15th day, Fiona is asleep on the chair on the right side of Phil's bed. Since the accident, she sleeps overnight at the hospital next to Phil's bed. Even though the chair isn't the most comfortable place to sleep, she feels more at ease when she's in close proximity with her brother. If Phil wakes up, she wants it to be her or any of their friends to be the first person that he sees.

Phil stirs. His hand twitches slightly before his eyes flutter open.

The ceiling light blinds his eyes. He has to blink a few times for his vision to adjust. His body feels weighed down. When he angles his head to the side, he finds Fiona still snoozing.

"Sis," he croaks. _I'm still breathing… I'm alive_. For the first time in two weeks, he's seeing colors other than black. The world is finally back into focus.

She doesn't respond, so he tries to speak louder. "Fiona."

She stirs. "There's no school, mom," she grumbles.

He smiles. "Not for you, but maybe there's school in other places on earth."

She gasps. "Phil?" She snaps her eyes open and glances at Phil. She beams when she notices the ice blue irises of her brother's eyes, which she hasn't seen in two weeks. "PHIL!"

 _Thank goodness she forgave me._ "Hey."

"HEY? You had me worried sick!"

"Sorry," he apologizes. "But I'm fine now, aren't I?"

She leaps off of her chair and gives Phil a careful hug, cautious of his injuries. "Good, because I'm not losing you again."

* * *

 **Every teleserye (or at least most of 'em) will always have one of these two things: an accident or a bomb. The bomb would've been a bit too much (there are times when I wonder where the hell these antagonists get the bombs), so I settled with the accident.**

 **So who do you think the mastermind is? I had to use labels like "'mam" and "madam" to keep the little mystery going. If this was a TV show, you'd know by now who this woman is (you have no idea how much I rage whenever I watch those moments).**

 **I have no idea if the way Dan lost his memories can actually happen. I wrote that scene to give a bit more of a dramatic flare, even if it's a bit unrealistic.**

 **To answer FALFAL's review, yes, Christy is a female version of Chris. When I was originally outlining IPY, I was gonna make Chris as part of the main group and kickthestickz would be amongst the side pairs, but because I was trying to keep the authentic teleserye feel and most teleseryes I watch barely even mention slash ships (cause you know, Filipinos are very traditional and the thought of homogenous for older generations will make them cringe), I chose to gender-swap Chris, even though I do ship kickthestickz and heart it whenever I see it in fanfics.**

 **~ AA**


	23. Prayers and a Clarity

Chapter 23: Prayers and a Clarity

Haiku

 _A life on the line_

 _I'm dying on the inside_

 _So just keep breathing_

* * *

Fiona is talking to Phil about what he missed over the last two weeks when a nurse drops by to Phil's room during her rounds, She's just as happy to see Phil awake as Fiona was and immediately calls for Phil's physician.

"I must say, this is quite remarkable," Dr. Rainfield comments after he measures and records Phil's vitals. He was also Louise, PJ, and Joe's physician during their time as patients in the hospital. "Your x-rays showed multiple damaged areas in your brain and I was expecting for you to have some sort of memory loss when you woke up."

Phil gazes at the gray-haired doctor. "So I could've had amnesia?"

Dr. Rainfield nods. "Luckily, you don't, and that's something I'm glad to see." He gives Phil a smile. "I'll give you some time with your sister and have you released by tomorrow morning."

Phil smiles back at Mr. Rainfield. "Thank you, doctor."

Mr. Rainfield nods once more, then leaves the room. Phil scoots back on the bed so he can prop himself upright into a sitting position. "So…"

"So…"

He asks the question that plagued his thoughts since he woke up. "Is Dan…?"

Fiona fiddles with the hem of her yellow cotton t-shirt. "He's still in a coma."

Phil closes his eyes. This is a nightmare come to life. He caused stress to all his friends and family while he was a coma, and now it's him feeling the stress for Dan. Dan, the boy that made his life brighter, could possibly never wake up. The future isn't set in stone. What if Dan doesn't wake up in five years? Ten years? How could he possibly live through life over the next several years hoping for a miracle that may never come? Because of the accident, there's a chance for him to lose the person that he can't live without.

"He's not dead," she says in an effort to comfort him. "If you woke up, then surely Dan has to wake up too."

"But what if he doesn't?"

"He will."

"How do you know that?" he cries out. "No one knows the exact date and time when someone will die. This isn't Death Note. What if Dan being in a coma is supposed to mean it's his time to go? All our hope could be for nothing! We might as well accept the fact he's already dead." _Wow, I'm sounding like Dan. The thought dampens his mood further._

"Phil, are you even listening to yourself?" She places her hands on his shoulders. "Aren't you supposed to be the optimistic one? I'd be the one that normally says those kind of things, not you. All of us have that fear of losing someone they care about. It's part of human nature. But in this situation, Dan would want you to be the strong one. I'm breaking down just as bad as you are in the inside, and not just because I have feelings for him. Even if I didn't like him, I'd still be sad because he's my friend and doesn't deserve to be like this. Whoever that stupid driver was, it's his damn fault for landing you, him, Lou, Joe, and Peej here." She gazes straight into his eyes, locking her ice blue irises to his. "He's going to be fine. He's going to wake up, because there's so much of his life he hasn't gotten to live yet. He's going to finish high school with us and go to college. He's going to have his dream job, get married, buy a car, have kids, and do all sorts of other grownup stuff. His life isn't over because of one car accident. You dug your way out of your coma, and now it's time for you to believe that Dan will do the same. He's a fighter. _He's going to survive._ "

He stares at her in shock. The accident shook up everyone's lives, him especially. He spent days in his vulnerable state, wishing to resume his life outside of the hospital again. The hope that his friends and family had pushed him out of the darkness. Why is he thinking about the worse case scenario? The thought had probably crossed their minds at least once during the last two weeks, yet he still defied the negativity and woke up.

They were all here for him. Now it should be his turn to do the same for Dan.

"You're right," he says softly. His body slightly relaxes from his worries. "Dan wouldn't die on me. He wouldn't leave me behind."

She gives him a light pat on his left shoulder. "Say it with me, bro. _Hope_. It's what I had when it came to love. It's what _you_ should have too."

 _Hope_. He's the one that sees the good in anything. However, this is a circumstance that could leave him in heartrending pain if his optimism will eventually be for nothing. He has to prepare himself for the likelihood of eternal darkness in his love life.

Dr. Rainfield is doing what he can. He needs to trust the good doctor. He has no ounce of medical expertise in him. All he can give to Dan is his love.

It's his love that he _hopes_ can save Dan.

* * *

~:~

* * *

He's sprawled on the colorful duvet of his bed back home. Dr. Rainfield discharged Phil from the hospital at 9 AM one day after he woke up. Now that his condition has vastly improved, his parents thought it would be best for him to move back home so Fiona and Susan can look after him. While he waited to be discharged, Fiona and Susan transferred his important belongings from Johnathan's apartment to the Lester household. As for Dan, Dr. Rainfield personally promised Phil that he'll continue to monitor Dan and tell Tabitha or Simon to inform the male Lester about any drastic shifts to his own comatose condition.

The CD that Dan gave to Phil during prom is inserted into his laptop, currently playing The Afters' Beautiful Love. It's a few minutes before midnight and all his mind can think about is Dan. He closes his eyes and drowns in the lyrics of the song.

 _ **What a beautiful smile**_

 _ **Can we stay for a while**_

 _ **On this beautiful night**_

 _ **To make everything right**_

 _ **My beautiful love**_

He recalls the night that they spent together stargazing. It was the first time that they snuck out of their houses to see each other. Stargazing was the type of date that they've thought about doing since they got together, though their parents' situations and Susan's natural reluctance to let Phil out of the house past 7 or 8 o'clock at night prevented them from doing so. However, that didn't stop them from trying to live out their dream anyway. Once they were sure that their families were asleep (or, in Fiona's case, too busy studying to bother looking out the window), they changed into clothes to keep them warm through the cool night and met each other at one of the city's parks.

That was the only night aside from prom night where they were alone during night hours without any distractions. They were somewhere where it was just the two of them. For a couple of hours, they pretended that they were runaway teenagers looking for a place to elope. Underneath a blanket of millions of stars, it was the closest they felt to being at their cabin.

 _"We'll always be like this."_

"Is this the always you were talking about?" Phil whispers. _Does our always mean there's always someone or something there to break us apart?_ What if the accident was a sign? What if the accident occurred because this was God's way of telling him that it isn't right for him to be with Dan?

He pauses the music from his laptop. Through the illumination from his internet mobile device, his eyes switches over to the Arceus plushie standing on the top of his dresser, next to a framed photo of him, Fiona, and his family. Arceus was supposed to be his present for Dan's 17th birthday. The toy was meant to be given after the beach trip, when he and Dan spent their boyfriend-boyfriend time together before he had to be home for dinner. Phil had it packed in his beach bag, and if he hadn't chosen to wait until their ride back home, Dan would have received the gift. He would have been graced with a present from Phil before the accident.

The toy is a bad irony. Arceus _is_ God, or at least in the Pokemon universe. _Maybe Arceus cursed us. Maybe we would've been fine and the accident wouldn't have happened if I left Arceus at home and waited like a normal boyfriend to give Dan his gift on his birthday._

If Dan continues to be like this, he'll never know just how much Phil loves him, how much it's killing him to breathe the same air without him, how much he tries to be happy around his loved ones, because they know that Phil is dying on the inside. The colors that he sees is nothing if Dan can't see them too. Phil is nothing without him. He would do anything to have Dan's coma disappear.

He would trade their love if it meant having his Dan back.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Under the heat of the sun's hot rays, Phil and his friends walk through a forest that Phil has grown fond of over the last few months. They are trekking along the path leading to the log cabin, where Phil had decided that it's finally the right time to show his friends. It is what Dan would have wanted them to do over the summer.

"Oh, memories," Fiona comments when the group finally reaches the clearing where the cabin is. "But to be perfectly honest, it does look nice."

"Indeed," Louise agrees. "If I wanted to live away from the city, I'd definitely want to come here."

"So why don't you?" PJ asks.

"Uh… no internet?"

"No internet? I'd pass. I'd rather deal with heavy traffic and global warming than give up social media," Alfie says.

Phil chuckles. "There may be no electricity, but if you want peace and quiet, this is the perfect place to be."

With his crutches and Fiona for assistance, Phil walks forward, and the friends follow him to the cabin. When he opens the door, they marvel at the amount of space within the small dwelling. Looking inside brings back memories of the first time he saw the cabin himself. His mouth makes a small smile at the memory of agreeing to pursue a relationship with Dan.

"I can see why you and Dan like it here so much," Zoe tells Phil. "Mind if Alfs and I borrow it for a date sometime?"

Alfie glances at Phil eagerly. "Yeah, can we? I could use a place where lady love and I can get down and dirty."

"Down and dirty?" Zoe exclaims. She nudges his shoulder roughly with her elbow. "We've only been together for a month and a half! I swear, if you try to cop a feel…"

Alfie lifts his hands up in protest, his palms facing her. "I won't! You know I wouldn't do that."

"You wouldn't do it, but you were thinking about it."

Joe moves to stand next to Phil. He shakes his head in amusement. "And this is why I'm a bit scared of having a girlfriend."

Phil grins. "It's normal to be scared. Relationships aren't easy-peasy."

"You and Dan seem to make it easy. I've never seen you two argue before."

"True, but that's because we talk to each other and listen to what the other has to say. We don't make snap judgements because rash decisions can turn out like that." He gestures with his head to the bickering couple.

"You and Dan are the most understanding boys I know, so that's probably why you two don't fight," Joe suggests.

Phil nods in agreement. Argumentative banters is Zoe and Alfie's thing. If there comes a day where he and Dan are locked in a heated argument, the first people he'd consult are the two people who have been doing it way before they ever became a couple.

"Alright!" Phil yells to Zoe and Alfie, ceasing their bickering. "The reason we're even here is for me to show you that this place doesn't have to be just my and Dan's secret getaway. It can be yours too."

Louise smiles. "Are you sure? You and Dan found this place first. You don't have to share it."

"Of course I'm sure. I'm not selfish," Phil replies. "Things fell into place between Dan and I because of the cabin. I want this to be somewhere where the magic can happen to you too."

Alfie beams. "So I can get down and dirty here?" He ignores Zoe's blatant glare at him.

 _Alfs, if only you knew the number of times Dan and I wanted to give in and have our first time here._ "Anytime you want, man."

It's the least he can do for the two growing lovebirds. His happiness should be their happiness too.

* * *

~:~

* * *

He sits on his bed at home with his mind overcome with a rush of different emotions. Guilt. Acceptance. _Love_. The realization hit him like a tennis ball thrown at him at 60 miles an hour. _I love her._

 _Love_. The four-letter emotion was what he battled against feeling for Stephanie. He reminded himself every night since he came home that Tabitha is his only love. He's supposed to be in love with his wife. It's why he married her. He loved her even after he found out that she was with another man, and he loved her when he slept with Stephanie. And yet, the emotion is weakening his romantic love toward his wife and strengthening toward a woman that doesn't deserve his feelings. He dragged her along into his situation, but instead of shoving him away like a normal, logical woman should have done, she let herself get involved.

Stephenie is kind, simple, and generous. She goes out of her way to make him feel like a worthy lawyer as well as a good friend. She doesn't expect anything from him, never seeking for rewards for her acts of friendship. She's a woman that he would have been interested in had he not met Tabitha.

At the office, they play the role of lawyer and personal assistant, Mr. Howell and Ms. Milton. Once they step foot out of the law firm, the labels don't matter. There's no Mr. and Ms. It's _Simon_ and _Stephanie_.

He covers his face with his bare arm. Hollywood doesn't joke around when their movies claim that sex complicates things. If he didn't sleep with Stephanie that first night, would he still have fallen for her the way he did? If he didn't let her into his problems, would he have been able to keep his professional distance from her? His newfound feelings are confusing him further, and the more that he thinks about her, the more mind-boggled he gets.

He once blamed Tabitha for falling in love with another man, but now that he's unintentionally falling in love with another _woman_ , he understands the guilt that she went through.

After all, he too should be at fault for breaking his vows.

* * *

~:~

* * *

At 1 PM on Monday morning, Phil sits on a chair on the right side of Dan's hospital bed, staring at the slumbering brunette teen. His laptop is propped on his lap, playing Hulog ng Langit from his mobile device's iTunes. His friends had frequently played music from their phones to him whenever they came to visit since, according to Dr. Rainfield, can help to stimulate brain activity. He wants to do the same for Dan, and what better music to play than from the playlist that Dan made himself?

 ** _Ikaw ang hulog ng langit_**

 ** _Ikaw ang aking pag-ibig_**

 ** _Ikaw ang katurparan dito sa aking daigdig_**

 ** _Ikaw sa akin ang bituin_**

 _ **Walang kupas ang ningning**_

 _ **Ligaya kang walang hanggan**_

 _ **Ako'y sa yo, at ika'y para sa akin**_

He has one version of an English translation of the song memorized by heart. He gets why Louise recommended the song. All the comparisons within the chorus is a replica of what he sees in Dan.

 _ **You are heaven-sent**_

 _ **You are my love**_

 _ **You are the fulfillment in my world**_

 _ **To me, you are the star**_

 _ **With never fading shine**_

 _ **You are never-ending happiness**_

 _ **I am yours, and you are for me**_

He must have listened to the CD hundreds of time since he received the CD. Every night before he goes to bed, he listens to at least one of the songs from the playlist, whether from the CD itself or from his phone. He could name all the songs in the CD within a minute and memorized all the lyrics from every song. He sings the songs in the shower and plays them on repeat when he's by himself.

"We really take sleep for granted," Phil says, leaning toward Dan and caressing the brunette's face with his left palm. "When we're young, we don't want to sleep so we can play more. When we're older, we crave sleep because we're so busy with our lives. And then when you're actually asleep and can't wake up, you're desperate to wake up because it's not the kind of sleep you want. You want to sleep when you want to and be awake so you can see all the good moments in the world. If you want to remain sleep forever, you can always sleep when you're dead."

He laughs sadly. After being in a coma for two weeks, he realized why sleep is the most important mechanism for human beings to control. Animals that hibernate have no choice to sleep for an entire season. But he's a human. Humans can sleep when they want to. The exception is when they are in a coma, just like Phil was and what Dan is still in.

"Don't go to sleep forever." The song ends, transitioning to Cassidy Ford's You've Got this Hold on Me. Phil maneuvers himself off of the chair and moves his head so it lays on Dan's chest, directly above his heart. "I love you so much. Save your eternal sleep until you're over 100. I can't lose you now, Dan. Don't let the world separate us. I've never loved anyone till I met you. You changed my life over the last school year. Please wake up, Dan. I love you _always and forever_."

 ** _You've got this hold on me_**

 ** _Don't wanna be set free_**

 ** _We'll lock ourselves away from everything_**

 ** _Cause you've got this hold on me_**

A tear escapes from his eye. One tear becomes two, until he becomes a sobbing mess. _You've got a hold on me too._ If the possibility of losing his boyfriend is his karma for hurting Fiona, he hopes karma has mercy on him. He gets it. He caused a lot of pain to his sister. But he doesn't deserve to suffer like this. Phil doesn't want to lose Dan in a situation that involves his death.

He lifts his head from Dan's chest, then sits back down on the chair. He wipes away leftover tears from his face. He closes his eyes and, with his hands, clasps them together. _God, if you're listening to me, please don't let this be Dan's time yet. If I have to stay away from him to let him wake up, I'll do it. I'll break up with him and let Fiona have her chance to be with him. I beg you, don't send him to heaven yet._ He opens his eyes. "Amen."

God pulled a miracle on him. Could he do one for Dan too?

* * *

~:~

* * *

On the 30th day, the dark fog lifts from Dan's mind. Alone in his hospital room, at precisely 11:32 PM, Dan opens his eyes. He takes his first breath awake, his body reacting similarly to how Phil did when he woke up.

Unknown to his parents, friends, and his beloved, he isn't the same person he was before the accident.

* * *

~:~

* * *

At 9 AM, Phil takes the first bus to the hospital with his crutches as soon as Adrian texted him about Dr. Rainfield's news. After being in a coma for almost a month, Dan has finally woken up. He has woken up sometime last night, and Dr. Rainfield monitored Dan's condition for the rest of the night to ensure the stability of his condition. Once the physician was certain that Dan won't have a relapse, he immediately told the Howells the good news. The bad news, however, is one that Phil is yet to know about.

He arrives at the hospital a half hour later. Tabitha is standing outside the door to Dan's room once Phil reaches the floor where he and Dan were hospitalized. She smiles at him in greeting, although an excited Phil doesn't notice the dejection hidden from her expression.

"Phil."

"I came as soon as Adrian told me the news," Phil pants, leaning against his crutches as he catches his breath. "How is he?"

"He's fine. I-"

"Thanks Mrs. Howell." He has no time for small talk. This is what he waited for to happen for the last several days.

"Phil, wait. There's something I need to tell you."

"Tell me after I see Dan."

"Phil, I think you need to know this now."

He shakes his head. "Please, Mrs. Howell. Let me see him first. After that, then you can tell me whatever it is you want to say."

She hesitates for a few seconds, then nods.

He grins. "Thanks!"

He walks past Tabitha and enters Dan's room. Dan is sitting up, his brown orbs flickering toward the disheveled raven-haired teen.

"Dan!" Phil wobbles to Dan's bed and gives the brunette one of his affectionate hugs. "You're awake."

"Uh… yes."

Phil draws back and looks at him eagerly. "I knew God wouldn't let me down. I can't wait to tell Fiona and the others that you're okay! We still have a few weeks before school, so I'm sure we can still make the best of our summer. I showed-"

"Stop," Dan interrupts, cutting Phil off mid-sentence. "You're talking too much."

"My bad," Phil apologizes.

Dan stares at Phil in confusion. Phil gives him a questioning stare. Why doesn't Dan look happy to see him?

"So… if you don't mind me asking, who are you?"

* * *

 **Yeah… I ain't a medical expert (yet), so I tried keeping all the health stuff down to a minimum. Until I'm officially working in the medical field, no amount of volunteering, job-shadowing, and work study at hospitals when I was in high school ain't enough for me to write stuff like this in fics and sound like I'm a health whiz. That, and I don't watch enough medical dramas. But if I could recommend a good health drama atm, watch Chicago Med. If you're not into sappy romance, this might be your cup of tea. Or House if you're into sarcastic doctors (my Cooperative Health teacher in my senior year of HS made us watch a few eps from the show).**

 **To FALFAL's review on the last chapter, thanks for giving me that heads up! I was gonna tweak the chapter a bit to follow your advice for Dan's side, but I thought it was more dramatic to keep it this way. But I'll keep what you said in mind!**

 **I don't normally talk about politics, so I'll leave you with this haiku I posted on my social media.**

 _ **It's one day after**_

 _ **America in distress**_

 _ **So god help us all**_

 **Yeah… so now it makes me think this: WHO THE HELL LET THE MOLDY CHEESE OUT OF THE FRIDGE?**

 **In other news, I'm hooked on this otome gaming app called Mystic Messenger. If you haven't played it yet, YOU SHOULD. The characters are so good. The story is an amazing mix of humor, fluff, and angst. It makes me wish Dan or Phil could be one of the romanceable players in the game. The game has only been out for a two or three months and the fandom for MM is getting bigger by the minute. Trust me, I've been obsessing over the fanfics/fanart of MM. *cough* Jumin Han is daddy for those of you who's into smut. Yes, that's literally what a lot of people refer Jumin to on Tumblr lol.**

 **~ AA**


	24. Amnesia and a Sacrifice

Chapter 24: Amnesia and a Sacrifice

Haiku

 _Blank spaces in his head_

 _Unable to remember_

 _The ones he loves most_

* * *

Phil's heart shatters into a tiny billion pieces, the shards piercing his chest. It's as if he's suffocating, because the room feels like it's spinning. This must be how Fiona feels whenever she has a panic attack. It's not… it can't be true.

"Are you okay?" Curiosity brims in the brunette boy's eyes. "Should I call the doctor or…?"

"I'm fine," he rasps. _I thought… I thought he'd be okay._

Dan looks at him sheepishly. "Sorry. My head's been wonky since I woke up."

"I can see that."

"Phil?" He turns around and sees Tabitha watching the two boys from the room's doorway. "Can I speak with you?"

Bile rises to the back of Phil's throat. He swallows, trying to keep a leveled expression to avoid breaking down in front of Dan. He nods toward Tabitha in response.

"I won't be long," he tells Dan. Without waiting for Dan's answer, he stumbles out the door with his crutches and joins Tabitha in the hallway.

He believed his nightmare was for Dan to never wake up from his coma. But this, this is his nightmare. A Dan that's alive and doesn't know who he is worse than a Dan who died with his heart full of love for Phil. He has what he wanted, but it came with a heavy price.

"How bad is it?" Phil whispers.

Tabitha sighs. "That's what I tried to tell you, Phil. Dan has amnesia."

Phil shakes his head in disbelief. _No… He knows me. He can't forget about me. He said his head was wonky. He'll be fine in a few hours. Or a few days. Some people who wake up from comas have temporary memory loss. That's what Dan has._ Temporary means it won't last forever.

"Dr. Rainfield said that it's partial amnesia. He remembers everything up until things that happened within the last couple of years."

"Couple of years?" Phil exclaims.

She nods. "He doesn't remember anything about you or the rest of your friends." She lowers her voice. "He's clueless about what happened between me and your father."

He leans against the wall, his legs weakening. He struggles to remain standing and not cripple to the floor. "Are you sure?"

"According to Dr. Rainfield, yes."

His stomach churns in discomfort. He grips his crutches tightly until his veins become apparent on his knuckles. This is the work of karma. He was selfish to unintentionally take Dan away from Fiona, and this is the consequence of his choice to follow his heart. Putting his happiness first over his sister's just meant that he'd be the one feeling the most emotional pain.

"Will he… go back to normal?"

"That's what I'm hoping for." She gives him a reassuring smile. "Don't be upset, Phil. Dan woke up. That's what matters. Now it's up to us to help him find himself."

 _Will he?_ What if Dan can't regain his memories? What if Dan will never remember all of the things that happened between them? What if Dan doesn't want to be his boyfriend anymore?

What if his memory loss happened for a reason?

* * *

~:~

* * *

Fiona calls Anthony to drive her to the hospital as soon as Phil texted her about Dan finally being awake. The smile hasn't been wiped off her face since she learned about the good news. _See, Phil? Hope is the solution to anything._

The two arrive at the parking lot of the hospital. Anthony pulls up in front of the hospital's front entrance. "Tell Dan I said hi."

She nods. "You sure you don't want to come with me?"

"I'm sure. I don't want to intrude on your reunion."

"He's your friend too, you know. He'll be happy to see you."

"I know. But he's closer with you and he deserves to see his closest friends first. I'll go see him next time, okay?"

"Fair enough." She gives him a brief hug. "I'll see you later."

She exits his car, waving at Anthony as he drives away. She enters the hospital, her positive spirits increasing the closer that she gets to Dan's room. She has a playful punch and a "it's about damn time" statement ready to say to Dan.

Phil is chatting with Dan when she reaches Dan's room. The two boys fall silent the moment that she joins them.

"Hi guys!" She beams at Dan. "I swear, don't you dare do that to us again."

Dan stares at her, looking like a boy who saw a pair of boobs for the first time. "Uh…"

"This is Fiona, my twin sister," Phil speaks up.

Fiona raises an eyebrow at Phil. Why is Phil introducing her to Dan?

"Oh…" A slight blush emerges on Dan's cheeks. "I didn't know. No wonder you two look alike."

 _Wait..._ "Do you have…?" she points to his head.

The embarrassed blush on Dan's face turns a deeper shade of red. "A little bit. I didn't recognize Phil and I don't recognize you, Fiona. Sorry."

"Don't be." Many patients who wake up from comas experience some form of memory loss, so she isn't too surprised that Dan fell under that category. "No one intended for this to happen."

"That's what everyone who spoke to me so far has been telling me."

"Which is true," Phil points out. "Accidents are accidents because it happens at the wrong place at the wrong time."

"Right…" Dan's eyes remains glued to Fiona. She notices, and she flushes. She's used to this kind of reaction when boys have their first impression of her. _Well, he is sorta meeting me for the first time._

Phil glances between them. "Fi, can I talk to you for a minute?"

She snaps herself out of her daze. "Oh! Uh… sure." She smiles toward Dan. "I'll be right back."

Dan smiles back at her. "I'm not going anywhere."

Fiona follows Phil out the door. He stops her a couple of rooms down from Dan's. She looks at him in confusion. She wanted to talk to Dan and catch up with him, so she hopes that what Phil has to say to her is quick. She's losing precious minutes of talking to Dan.

"What is it?" she questions in a hushed tone.

"Fi, do you still like Dan?"

She blinks. Why would Phil ask her that? He knows that her feelings for Dan remain strong. If she couldn't get over him for the last few months, what makes him think that she's over him now?

"Don't play dumb with me," she answers. "I like him as much as I did several months ago."

He gives her a curt nod. "Good, because now's your chance."

"My chance? What are you talking about?"

He gazes at her sadly. "Sis, I've been thinking about this since I woke up. Just like you and the others, I prayed night after night for Dan to wake up from his own coma. But think about it: don't you think this accident is a sign? What if this is God's way of telling us something?"

"Phil, this is nonsense. It's a stroke of bad luck for Dan to have amnesia. But he can get his memories back. We'll all help him. Bro, he's your boyfriend. Relationships aren't perfect. This is a problem you two can get through."

"Fiona." He grabs her shoulders roughly. "Don't you get it? Yeah, the accident was our unfortunate luck. But maybe it happened because this is God's way of fixing our mistakes. As long as Dan doesn't remember us, he also doesn't remember what happened between dad and Mrs. Howell. If we were that unlucky, Dan's head would've been wiped clean. But it didn't. Don't you think it's weird that out of all the parts that he could forget, it would be the things that happened since he moved here?"

She mulls this over for a moment. Phil does have a point, though she doesn't get how his explanation fits with her having a chance for something. "So what are you saying bro?"

His grip on her shoulders loosens. "I'm saying… it's supposed to be Dan and I against the world, but the world defeated us. The world won and it's telling me it's supposed to be you and Dan, not us. I made a promise to God that I'd do anything to have Dan back." He bites his lip. "I would do anything, even if I'd break up with him."

"Wh-Phil! You were never a religious person, but now you choose to listen to the word of God? You're insane." _You're out of your mind._ Grief must have hit Phil too hard during the weeks between his and Dan's awakening. Whatever hopeless idea that her brother thought about, she wants it to get out of his head.

"Insane or not, I made my choice. I'm letting go of Dan. I'm giving you to him."

She stands there in shock. One analyzing look into Phil's despaired eyes proves that he was honest about every word that he spoke. _No! This is not how I want to be with Dan!_ She wants Dan to return her feelings as himself, not as the person he is now.

"I can tell what you're thinking," he says. "I know you don't want to do this, but you have to. Do it for me. I had my happiness. We had a great run, but sometimes love doesn't turn out the way we planned. I broke our promise, Fi. This is my way to fix it."

"By _hurting_ yourself? No, Phil. I won't let you do it."

He shakes his head. "It hurts, sis. I know it does. But I saw the way Dan looked at you. It should have been what he did before we ever got together. Now look at him. It's a fresh start. I can pretend we weren't ever together and you can get him to love you the way he's supposed to."

 _A fresh start? Pretending? Are you fucking kidding me?_ "What drama did Louise get you addicted to this time?"

"None…"

"Ugh… doesn't matter." She crosses her arms. "You're reminding me a whole lot of those female characters in those movies that think sacrificing their feelings will be worth it. News flash, Phil: it's not. What you're doing is gonna hurt Dan too. You're not gonna be able to hide this from him forever. If you're not gonna tell Dan you're his boyfriend, I will."

His eyes bulge open. "No! Whatever you do, don't. If you won't take the chance, then I won't blame you. But whatever you do, don't you dare say a word about us to him."

"Why not? Everything you're saying right now is all the reasons why I should tell him."

"Because it's too soon." He looks at her forlornly. "Don't worry, I will tell Dan about what we were, but it'll be when things get better. Look how he reacted when he saw you. That was the first time I saw him respond that happily to something. When he saw me for the first time, he was confused." He pauses for a moment, then continues. "I don't like keeping secrets from Dan, but this has to be one I'm doing for his sake."

She raises an eyebrow. "Are you sure it's for his sake and not yours?"

"Yes." He sighs. "And for our parents' sake too, we shouldn't tell him about dad's and Mrs. Howell's relationship."

"Now that I can agree with." If there was anything Fiona knew she would keep her mouth shut about, it would be about their parents' relationship problems. That's a topic she would rather let Tabitha and Simon tell Dan themselves.

"Promise?" Phil raises his hand, directing his pinky finger toward her. "Promise me we won't tell Dan anything involving my relationship with him and the relationship between our parents and his."

"Bro, we broke our childhood pinky swear. If that one didn't last, this one won't either."

"Okay… let me rephrase it: promise me we won't tell Dan about said relationships _yet_. We'll only tell him if he suspects something and demands us for answers."

She hesitates with her response, but after a minute, she too sticks out her pinky finger, linking it with his.

"I don't like this-" she says in a regretful tone, "But if it's for a right cause, I can't say no."

* * *

~:~

* * *

That night, a devilish smirk appears on a woman's face. _Maybe the accident wasn't a bad thing after all. I can use Dan's clean slate to my advantage._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Dan is released from the hospital the next day. Like Phil, he's relying on the use of crutches for the next few weeks. The disappearance of a chunk of his memories frustrates him, though forcing himself to recall a memory only causes him to get headaches. Dr. Rainfield assured him that his memories may return gradually, yet for someone who loves to cherish memories, Dan is impatient to have a full brain as soon as possible.

The twins have been a permanent fixation in his thoughts. From the time since he has woken up, he has gotten to know more about two of the people that he was apparently close to when he moved to their hometown. He clearly understands why the Lesters are his close friends. Phil is unlike most guys he has ever met: he can't play sports, collects plushies, and isn't opposed to watching chick flicks. On the other hand, Fiona reminds him of a female version of himself: she cusser as often as he does, is a hardcore but respectful gamer, and yet likes girly clothes (she has a soft spot for pastel colors). Together, he views the twins as two people that balance each other out, two people that are interconnected beyond their similar blood and faces.

Blood runs thicker than water between Phil and Fiona. Their blood is thicker than bricks, thicker than the Harry Potter and Game of Thrones novels stored in a box underneath his bed.

He's watching an episode of Game of Thrones on his bed when Phil opens the door to his room. His crutches lie on the floor at his right side of his bed as a consistent reminder of his condition. _Maybe if I hide that in the morgue, I can pretend I have no problems and I'm still the Dan that everyone who I supposedly know knows._

"Hey Hobbit Hair," Phil greets.

"Hobbit what?"

Phil looks at Dan sheepishly. "Sorry. Sometimes I forget you have amnesia."

A crude laugh escapes from Dan's mouth. "Out of all the things I could forget, I could at least forget about the shit worth forgetting."

"Like what?"

"Hmmm… well, my mom made me dress up as a witch for Halloween one time when I was little. She bought my costume on the day of Halloween and it was one of the only ones left on sale."

Phil chuckles. "A witch? That's the worst costume ever!"

"I know, right?"

"I mean, you're far from a witch. You're more like an angel."

Dan grins. "If I'm an angel, I must be a dark one."

Dan loves talking to Phil. While his stomach does flip-flops whenever he thinks about Fiona, his chest is warm when he's with Phil. Phil is someone he wished he had as a best friend in his former hometown. Phil is a more cheerful and innocent version of him, and just being around him helps to ease his troubles away.

"Anyway-" Phil says, switching the topic, "It's been only around a day, but has anything jogged your memory yet?"

Dan shakes his head. "Nothing. My head's an blank abyss and it hurts when I even try. I've stopped trying to remember anything for now because what I want is to have all my 206 bones back to proper working order."

Phil nods. Dan notices a cloud of sadness in the raven-haired boy's eyes. _He has a right to be sad. He has a miserable excuse of a friend who couldn't even remember that hobbit-whatever name he said earlier._

"Dan…"

"Yeah?"

"What do you think about my sister?"

"Fiona?" His face grows warm. _What do I think of your sister? She's gorgeous and a legit gamer girl at the same time._ "She's cool."

A coy smile emerges from Phil's mouth. "Cool huh?"

The blush on Dan's face deepens. "What do you want me to say?"

"How about 'I like her'?"

"Wh… How… Uh…" Dan sputters.

Phil joins Dan on the bed, sitting down on the side of the bed that doesn't have Dan's crutches on the floor. "There were many guys before you that liked my sister. Trust me, I know the look on someone's face when he's attracted to Fi."

"Is it that obvious?"

"You weren't so subtle when you first met her."

 _Damn. Now he's gonna tell me to stay away from her._ "Are you mad?"

"Mad? Hell no! Just between you and me, Fi likes you too."

Dan gasps. "No." _A beautiful girl likes me? Nuh-uh. The punk nerdy emo kid never gets girls like Fiona Lester._

"She does!"

Dan looks at Phil skeptically. "How do I know you're not fucking around with me?" He has amnesia. Phil could be lying and saying those things out of pity when, in reality, he could have been beaten up all the time in this city.

"Because Fi told me herself. If you want proof, I'll tell her you asked."

"There's no need for that!" Dan directly responds, humiliated by the thought of revealing to Fiona that he's interested in her.

"I mean it. I shouldn't even be telling you this because Fi swore she'd cut my balls off if I uttered a word to you."

"She'd really cut off your balls?"

"She would," Phil responds with a chuckle. "But I mean it. You had plans to ask her out before the accident."

"What kind of plans?"

"Well… you wanted to surprise her with a bunch of her favorite songs you were gonna burn on a CD."

 _Hmmm… yeah, I could see myself doing that._ "Did I get started on it?"

"Nope. You had a few songs in mind though."

"Name one."

"A Thousand Years by Christina Perri."

Dan scrunches his nose. Ever since his conversion to the rock scene when he was in middle school, he's not used to listening to music outside that genre. He can, however, picture A Thousand Years being a favorable song to Fiona. There's no girl on Earth that likes pop music that wouldn't like Christina Perri.

"Alright… so if I was gonna ask out Fiona, did you mind the idea of the two of us going on a date?"

Phil shakes his head. "I'm a supporter of Fan."

"Fan? Wait, is that what my ship name with Fiona would be?"

"Yup," Phil says with a grin, though Dan could have sworn there was a tinge of sorrow in his friend's blue orbs. _Maybe he was just sad of having to see his sister grow up._ Dan would be the same once Adrian goes on his first date.

"If I were you, I'd ask her out ASAP," Phil suggests. "Fiona had her eye on you since the first day you were here. To be honest, I could think of no better boy that matches with my twin sister than you."

"Are you sure? I mean, I don't want to take advantage of her."

"Dan, don't overthink it," Phil assures him. "I know you're the type of guy that'll treat Fi right. You don't remember this, but you told me once that the one thing you want the most is love. And you know what? Fiona can be the one to make your wish come true. All you have to do is find the courage."

The image of Fiona crosses his mind. He believes Phil. He saw how happy Fiona was when she went to visit him in his hospital room. She cares about him, even more than a friend would, according to Phil. He has never met a girl like Fiona, and it would be a mistake if he was a coward to turn his crush into a relationship. _I have to ask her out. Before another nerdy punk emo boy with a less depressing backstory steals her attention and he gets his happily-ever-after with her._

"Courage, huh?" Dan says. "Can you help with that?" As far as he can remember, the closest he has ever went on a date was when he took Lizzie Walters to the winter formal when he was in 7th grade.

Phil smiles. "Anything for a friend."

* * *

 **So yeah. Dan has amnesia. Bet you didn't see that coming. If you did actually try to look up Dolce Amore (the teleserye I mentioned all the way back in chapter 3), you'd know that Serena got into an accident that caused her to have amnesia. Apparently, it's becoming a thing in teleseryes for characters to get amnesia (it makes for good plot twists), so I thought that it would be a good way to incorporate that factor into the story. But I didn't want to go full-on memory blank like most fics do, so that's why Dan only has partial amnesia. I didn't there was such a thing as that till I read this book called Telling Christina Goodbye by Lurlene McDaniel.**

 **As of this chapter, I'm so far behind on chapters. There's 10 more chapters left plus the epilogue. I want IPY to be complete by the end of the year, so the whole two chapters per week schedule probably won't apply anymore. There might be a week where I won't update at all, or a week where I update every day for two or three days, or even when I update multiple chapters on a single day. That depends on when I find time to write (hooray for college). From now till December, I'm gonna be on a system where I'll update as soon as I finish and proofread the chapter.**

 **~ AA**


	25. Guilty Consciences and a Camping Trip

Chapter 25: Guilty Consciences and a Camping Trip

Haiku

 _Joining in a lie_

 _Helping to protect a boy_

 _From learning the truth_

* * *

Dan stands outside at the front door of the Lester residence with the aid of his crutches for support. It has been two weeks since he was discharged. During those two weeks, he met the rest of the twins' friends and resumed his work at Dillion's. Seeing the Suggs, Alfie, PJ, Louise, Ian, and Anthony didn't stir any recollection of memories about them, but he hopes that the more time he spends with them, the more likely he'll start to remember something, even if it's as small a memory as watching a movie with them. Any memory of the last two years is better than nothing.

Thanks to Phil, Dan has used the last five days to find the courage in himself to ask Fiona on a date. When he wasn't working or getting to know his friends, he was hanging out with Phil, rehearsing what he'll say and how he'll act around Fiona when he pops the question. In the span of those five days, he went from being a stuttering, fumbling date virgin to a confident teen who knows his way around the field of romance. He also debated whether or not to go through with his supposed plan of the CD, but decided to save the idea for after the date (if Fiona even agrees to the date at all).

So here he is now, about to do the one thing he once believed he'd never get to do in his high school life. It's 15 minutes past 1 PM (he binge-watched Food Wars on Crunchyroll until 2 AM and didn't wake up until about two hours ago). He texted Fiona when he woke up for the day to ask if he could hang out with her, and he held back from squealing like a schoolgirl when she agreed to.

"Don't be a weenie," he mumbles. "Fiona likes you. You like Fiona. Your dream girl is awaiting your first move."

After taking a few deep breaths, he removes his phone from his jeans' pocket and sends a text to Fiona. _**Hey I'm here**_

Not one minute following the sent text, the front door swings open, revealing the female Lester twin barefoot and wearing a pale pink spaghetti tank top and green athlete shorts.

"Hey Howell!" she greets.

"H-hi," he stutters. _Focus, Dan! Where's your confidence?_

"Come on in. Phil already left, so it's just us today."

He nods, wobbling his way into the house. He's aware that Phil is with PJ, Joe, and Louise at an arcade for the day (it was Phil's way to give a few hours for Dan to be alone with Fiona), Alfie and Zoe is on a date to who knows where (he's surprised to see how a duo who's constantly bickering with one another can still be in love), and Ian and Anthony are helping one of their friends' siblings apply for a job (he's envious of Fiona for being able to have college friends simply because she was courageous enough to approach them while she was at Best Buy last autumn).

"Did you eat lunch yet?" she asks once the door is closed and Dan is making himself comfortable on the living room couch.

"I ate a quick brunch before I came." _If you count a bowl of Lucky Charms as a late breakfast so I could rush over here to see you._

"What did you eat?"

"An omelet."

She raises an eyebrow, looking as if she's not entirely convinced. "You sure?"

"You think I'm lying?"

"No. You haven't been out of the hospital long and I just wanna make sure."

"Why? Did Phil avoid eating too?"

"Er… no. Sorry. I worry a lot and sometimes I stupidly think your amnesia can make you forget to have a healthy diet."

He chuckles. "If that were true, I'd live on a diet of water and malteasers."

She chuckles along with him. "You'll drop dead if you did that." She starts to head to the kitchen. "Want a drink at least? I have iced tea in the fridge."

"I'm cool with that."

When Fiona leaves to grab the drinks, Dan undergoes another series of deep breaths. _This is it, Dan. Don't be a chicken. When she comes back, ask her the question. Rip it off like a Band-Aid. It's not hard. All you have to say is "Will you go out with me?" Ninety-five percent of the entire male population has asked this question to the person they like._ What he has to cross his fingers for is to be the 45% or higher of the male population who asked that question who doesn't get a rejection.

"Dan?"

He blinks. As he was lost in his thoughts, Fiona returned with two cans of iced tea, placed them on the coffee table, and is staring at him in curiosity.

"Yeah?"

"What're you thinking about?"

"Ummm… things." _The time is now!_ "Actually, there is something I want to talk to you about."

She joins him on the couch. "What is it? Wait, did you remember anything?"

"No… it's something else."

"Which is…?"

He gazes at her nervously. "I was wondering… would you like to catch a movie with me sometime?" _Yes! There you go. That wasn't so hard._

She looks at him tentatively. "Are you asking me out?"

He nods.

She remains silent for about a minute. He's mentally curled into a fetal position, bracing himself for the embarrassment of hearing the word 'no.' He shouldn't be surprised for his first attempt to ask a girl out to end with rejection, though he cringes at the thought of being awkward around Fiona after today. Having to get over his crush until someone else catches his eye would be hard to do (he hates to admit how he'd partially be in the clingy category if he ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend).

"You're pretty brave, aren't you?" she says. "You're not usually the one who makes the first move."

"Phil said the same thing to me a few days ago, so you aren't wrong."

She smiles. "Whatever hints Phil might've dropped on you, you caught on."

"So… is that a yes?"

She giggles. "Of course it's a yes, goofball."

He beams. In his mind, he has gotten out of his fetal position and running circles around the room in joy wearing nothing but a speedo (he also watched a couple episodes of Free! during his anime binge-watching last night).

"Great!" he says, trying to maintain a composed expression. "So when do you want to go out?"

"Uh… I'll let you know." He would have asked to go on their date this weekend, though the two of them and the rest of their friends have other plans this weekend. They had received their parents' consent to allow them to join the Suggs family for a camping trip as an end-of-the-break adventure before they, with the exception of Ian and Anthony, head back to school next week.

"Okay then."

 _I'M GOING ON A DATE WITH FIONA FUCKING LESTER. I'm gonna thank Phil with a lifetime supply of Muse albums._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Next to a dumpster in a deserted alley, a man and a woman are talking in hushed voices of their next move in their diabolical plan.

"Are you sure, madam?" the man inquires. "There's a possibility that we will fail again."

The woman sighs. "I admit, this is a bit of a long shot, and I miscalculated what happened last time. But we have to try."

"Trying can lead to disaster, madam."

"Do you not have trust in me?" she snaps. "I hired you for a reason, Wade. Now is not the time to have doubts."

He bows his head. "I'm sorry. I only wish for your success."

Her eyes soften. "I know you do. I also know you have a family, and you would do anything for them too, right?"

"I-Indeed, madam."

"We're doing this, Wade. We learned from our mistakes and I swore to do better next time. I will not admit defeat until the end."

He nods. "I'll do my best."

Her mouth curls in a half-smile. "Our best is all we need to accomplish our goals."

* * *

~:~

* * *

That night, Fiona sits on her sky blue beanbag chair next to her bedroom window. She's still on a cloud nine from her afternoon with Dan, but she can't blame herself for the simultaneous guilt that's also pounding at her chest. _Your no could've helped him be one step closer to getting his memories back._

She should be happy. This is what she wanted. She's doing what Phil asked her to do. She's finally being given the chance that she dreamed of having ever since she first met Dan.

However, it's all absolutely wrong. Not merely because she's practically being forced to take Dan away from Phil. It's also because a relationship with Dan that would appease her family and possibly the entire school but disappoint her friends, the people that, after the weeks she spent with Hannah, Katie, and Jessica, she knows she can't be without.

 _It's not too late, Fi. You can still take it back._ She could text Dan right now and tell him that she changed his mind. She could tell him that she isn't ready to be in a relationship yet and to wish him the best of finding love with someone else. If she does that, she could chase the guilt swarming around in her head like a group of angry hornets.

 _And what about Phil?_

She has respect for Phil. He loves her just as much as Dan. She sees how hard it is for her brother to watch his boyfriend falling for someone else. He gave up the person that taught him about the romantic spectrum of love for the person who always tried to put her happiness first before his. And her? All she has been is selfish. She was too caught up in her feelings for Dan to see how difficult it was for Phil to control his own emotions for her sake. And when the truth about Dan and Phil came out, instead of rationalizing the situation, her anger took over. Her envy boiled over, leading her to wallow in her loneliness despite her time spent with Hannahconda and her posse.

 _I can't do that to Phil._ She thought it was Phil who hurt her; in reality, it was the other way around. She was the one that hurt everyone with her resentment. In some way, if she had a proper discussion with Phil before the beach trip, they could've avoided the accident altogether. No one could have gotten physically hurt, and Dan wouldn't be in a state where he can't remember every complicated, life-changing event that happened to him over the last school year.

The power is in her hands. She has the choice to tell Dan the truth before they head back to school.

But she won't.

It's wrong for her to lie to Dan, yet it's also wrong for her to break her promise to Phil. The latter may be the lesser wrong, but there's no telling how Dan would react. His confusion could lead his condition to worsen, which is definitely what she wants to avoid doing to him.

She can't be responsible for committing any more wrongs.

The favorable solution is to bite her tongue, go on a date with Dan, and hope for Phil to realize on his own that what they are doing will only make him hate them more later on.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Laughter fills the air as the Suggs and the friends arrive at the camp site. They've been eagerly awaiting this day since Joe and Zoe brought it up to the friends the previous week. It's the first time the friends are all going on a camping trip together, and with the addition of Dan, Ian, and Anthony, they are excited to see what the day has in store for them.

"Oh, how I love the great outdoors," Alfie says, spreading his arms out wide.

"You're only saying that after our last hike," Joe points out.

Zoe giggles. _I wonder what would've happened if he wasn't there. We probably wouldn't be where we are now._ "Says the one who doesn't have a girlfriend."

Joe huffs. "I'm doing just fine without my own lady love, thank you very much."

"I'll tell Miranda you said that."

"Don't you dare."

"Oh, I'd dare."

Alfie moves back to Zoe's side and grabs her hand. "You're just saying that because the lovebug has never bitten you."

Joe drops his backpack on the grass. "Tis better to be single than to love from afar."

"I heard that!" PJ calls out.

 _So did Phil._ Ever since Fiona confided in her and Louise about Phil's choice to lie about his relationship with Dan, she too has been crushing her urge to spill the beans on her brunette friend. She can't stand to see the longing in Phil's eyes whenever Dan makes sneaky glances at Fiona. Phil asked for everyone the day after Dan woke up to keep their lips sealed and to leave it to him to decide when to tell Dan the truth. The seven friends, Ian, and Anthony all disagree over Phil's decision, but there's nothing they can do. To Zoe, at the end of the day, Phil is still one of her best male friends. She can't betray him.

"Lady love?" She turns her head to look at Alfie, who's gazing at her with a worried expression.

She gives him a small smile. "Sorry. Didn't mean to space out."

"Were you thinking about Phil?"

She nods. "I'm just worried about him. I really don't like what he's doing to Dan."

"Me neither," he says in agreement. "Imagine how Dan will feel when he finds out the one he's actually in love with is the sibling of the one he thinks he likes."

"And if it's not us that won't tell him, surely someone at school will slip," she adds.

"I know, right? If only we could put him out of his misery."

"Hi guys." Zoe and Alfie cease speaking when they see Dan walking toward them. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh… you know… relationship stuff," Zoe bluffs.

Dan nods in understanding. "Zoe, your dad wants you and Alfie to help him gather some wood for the fire."

 _Thank god! I need to be away from them for a few minutes before I drag Dan away from here and tell him Phil's his boyfriend._ "Thanks. Tell Dad Alfs and I will join him in a few minutes."

"Alright." Once Dan leaves the pair, Zoe and Alfie share a that-was-a-close-call look to each other.

"Do you think he caught any of that?" Alfie asks.

"I hope not." It'll be their fault if Dan starts having suspicions.

"We gotta be more careful next time."

"Ditto. Philzilla is one hell of a creature I don't want to lay my eyes on if we're responsible for ruining this entire cover-up."

* * *

~:~

* * *

A few hours later, the sun has retired for the day and dusk stretches its long shadows across the woods. Flames reach for the sky at the camp site. The ten friends sit on logs around the fire in a loose circle, each holding a stick with at least one marshmallow attached.

Louise has her laptop resting on her lap. Her iTunes is on, her _Road Trip_ playlist on shuffle, playing songs to cover up the relative silence around their camping zone. With the nearest WiFi hotspot several miles away from them and no one's phones having any cell reception, they've been relying on music, icebreaker games, and banters to pass the time. Prior to the trip, Alfie was dreading to have several hours without being online. Now, his perspective about camping being a slow torture of being internet-less to being a time to have fun time with his friends, as well as some intimate minutes with his girlfriend.

 _Wish you're here with me, Matt._ Louise thinks. She isn't too saddened to be without her boyfriend, though having Matt sitting next to her could help to deal with the constant heart eyes of the only stable couple in the group.

Louise scans the area. Mr. and Mrs. Sugg have left the friends about a half-hour ago and are in their tent. PJ, Joe, Phil, Ian, and Anthony are challenging each other to a Nintendo game on their 3DS's. Alfie and Zoe are cuddling as they feed warm marshmallows to each other. Dan and Fiona, despite having their date on a later day, are talking to each other and treating the night as their first date. Even in the darkness, despite the smiles that Fiona consistently makes toward Dan, Louise can see the guilt masked beneath her best friend's blue irises. And, over to the side, she catches Phil's occasional dejected glance at Dan.

 _Hmmm… maybe I could do something about that._

Once Rihanna's Work finishes playing, she pauses the song and quickly scrolls through the playlist for the song she reserved to play for the right moment. _This could backfire, but it's worth a try. This is for you, Phil._

"Hey everyone!" she shouts.

The friends stop what they are doing.

"What's up?" PJ questions.

"Who wants to have a dance party?"

Zoe chuckles. "Girl, I have two left feet."

Louise grins. "I'm aware of that, but we're in the middle of the woods, there's no witnesses except for your parents, and there's no one to take a video of our clumsiness."

"Video or no video, I'll still be embarrassed," Phil says.

 _Your embarrassment could help you out._ "Then you might change your mind once I play the song."

Using the mousepad on her laptop, she clicks on the song title.

Zoe leaps up in excitement as soon as the first couple seconds of the song plays.

"Lou! Why didn't you say you'd be playing this song?" She tugs on Alfie's hand. "Who gives a flying fuck about my two left feet? This is my jam!"

Alfie laughs, moving to stand up too. Zoe dashes closer to the fire and starts to dance. "Damn it, Louise. Out of all the times to bust this song out, why now?"

"Because-" Louise balances her laptop on the log and joins Zoe and Alfie, "This might be the only time this song is ever fitting to play."

"You got that right!" PJ abandons his 3DS on his log and goes to Zoe, Alfie, and Louise. "Dance party!"

 _ **No signal on our phones**_

 _ **Leave 'em busy with the dial tone**_

 _ **It's all good, we don't need no one else**_

One by one, the friends huddle together and dance as if they are in a night club. With the fire raging on, the active bodies is a near flawless scene for a music video. But, like the Halloween dance, Phil remains on the sidelines, content to watch the rest of his friends grooving to the music.

"C'mon Phil!" Louise yells, pulling on the sleeve of Phil's shirt. "Let loose! No one's gonna care about your own two left feet."

"I'll pass," he answers, directing his attention toward Dan and Fiona, who are dancing next to Zoe and Alfie. "Don't wanna intrude everyone with my horrible moves."

Louise leans closer to Phil until her mouth is inches from his ear. "Phil, I did this for you."

Surprise surfaces in his eyes. "What do you mean?"

"Phil… We're all against what you're doing to Dan. You say you want to help him get through his amnesia, yet you're being a hypocrite by not telling him the things he has to know. We're all being liars for your sake. But this is me helping Dan without saying anything."

"I'm still not following."

She sighs. "Join us. Dance with Dan. This could be a chance for him to fall in love with you again, all on his accord."

As if Dan knows what they are talking about, he breaks away from the group and goes to where Louise and Phil are.

"Phil! Why aren't you dancing? You're missing out on Ian's disco moves."

"I… don't know," Phil says.

Dan smiles. "I'm looking like a robot high on weed over there. You can't be any worse than me."

Phil chuckles. "High on weed, huh?"

Louise winks. "See? Even Dan wants you there!"

"Yeah!" Dan looks at Phil pleadingly. "Please? The song's almost over and it's catching on to me. No wonder Zoe and Fiona love it so much."

"It's why Asian music rocks my world," Louise says. "And even if it ends, I'll play it on repeat till Phil does something like the sprinkler with us."

 _ **Sa tabing dagat, tayo lamang dalawa**_

 _ **Going somewhere no one knows, we're chilling all night long**_

 ** _Let love take us higher_**

 _ **Sa tabing dagat, tayo lamang dalawa**_

 _ **With the back stereo, we're singing our love song**_

 _ **By the bonfire (fire)**_

Phil stays sitting on the log for several seconds until he shakes his head and stands.

"You owe me, Louise," Phil tells the blonde-haired girl.

Louise beams. She rushes back to her friends, and she watches in glee as Dan grips on Phil's elbow and leads him to where Fiona is.

 _Reminder: next time, let Dan in on everything that involves getting Phil to do something I want._

* * *

~:~

* * *

In the midst of the dance party, concealed by a thicket of bushes, a man watches the friends with a pair of binoculars.

"Shit," he grumbles. "Madam will not like this."

 _I'm doing my job. No matter what, Dan must remain clueless, and I won't let Phil ruin madam's plans._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Several minutes past 2 AM, Dan is sitting alone on one of the logs at the camp site. The fire is gone and everyone is either asleep or playing on their phones. Dan is having trouble falling asleep, so he thought breathing in the cool night air could help him out.

Being in the woods with his close friends makes him happy. There was something about the dance party earlier that stirred familiarity in his stomach. Maybe it was watching Fiona dance better than backup dancers at concerts or finally seeing Phil dance with them. Either way, he couldn't contain the positive adrenaline that coursed through his veins as he danced in ways he never thought his body could ever move.

 _Have I ever been at a bonfire before?_ Maybe that's why I danced so well. Phil did mention during the car ride to the camp site that he was at their school's Halloween dance last autumn, where he shared a slow dance with Fiona.

He wonders what slow-dancing with Fiona was like. He must have felt as relaxed as he was just a few hours ago.

"Yo Dan." PJ yawns, crawling out of his sleeping bag. "Can't sleep?"

He nods. "Am I an insomniac?"

PJ shrugs. "Beats me. But you're lucky you're not sharing a tent with Joe. He's a snoring log in there."

Dan laughs. "Is that why you came out here?"

"If it means putting some distance from Mr. Snore."

Dan scoots over to the far left of the log to give PJ space. PJ gets himself comfortable on the log before he speaks again.

"Nice weather for a camping trip, right?"

 _Perfect weather. I would've bailed if I felt one raindrop on my head._ "It's nice. Thanks for letting me come along."

"You don't need to thank us. It wouldn't be the same without you here."

Dan crosses his legs. "I must've made quite an impression on you then when you all met me."

PJ smiles. "It's hard to ignore someone who has the exact same music taste as Phil."

"Right. Phil told me I met you all on your first day of 11th grade and Joe's first day of high school."

"Uh-huh. You two instantly bonded because of your love for Muse."

Dan grins. _Phil never told me that._ "Really?"

"Yeah. It was the first time Phil ever met someone that had his exact same music taste."

"Wow. No wonder we get along so well."

PJ nods in agreement. "You coming into our lives was one of the best things that ever happened. You know what's real and while you sass better than housewives in Beverly Hills, you have an open heart."

"Which is why I like Fiona, right?"

PJ hesitates for a second before he nods again. "Love is shitty, but hey, it's what keeps the world balanced."

"You speak like you know what love is." Aside from Zoe and Alfie, he isn't aware if anyone else in the group has crushes on anyone.

PJ stares at the leftover charred wood where the earlier fire burned. "Depends on your definition on love. I mean, I don't know if Phil even mentioned this to you, but there is a girl I like."

"Who is it?"

"Christy Kendall."

Dan looks at PJ in confusion. "Christy?"

"Yeah. I've liked her for a long time. She was my first kiss, but only because of a stupid game of spin the bottle during summer camp, which I don't think is really stupid come to think of it." He sighs. "You've only seen her a handful of times since she has other friends, but she sort of reminds me of you. She has your sarcasm, but she's really dirty-minded." He chuckles. "It's what I like about her. She's silent but fierce."

"Then why haven't you told her how you feel?" Dan inquires. The way PJ talks about Christy makes it seem like the curly-haired teen should have been dating this girl by now.

"Because love is also fear." PJ breaks his stare away from the fire to look at Dan. "I'm not scared about rejection, because hell everyone thinks it's obvious that she likes me back. I guess… it's because once two people are in love, two people also have the potential to walk down the path of heartbreak. I'd rather be safe and love from far away than to have the one I love and eventually be forced to let her go."

Dan mulls over PJ's response. Was fear a reason why he hadn't asked out Fiona too? _What if Fiona and I don't work out?_

PJ shakes his head. "Forget I said anything. Christy and I are one thing. Don't worry, you and Fiona are perfect together. Trust me on that."

"That's what all you guys are saying, but I'll only believe it if an 'us' happens."

"You and Fiona will be fine. She isn't one of my close friends for a reason."

 _He's right. I've got to stop putting myself down._ "Okay. And if I could be of any help, I think it's bullshit for you to hold yourself back. Tell Christy how you feel while you still can. You won't know what you're missing until the chance disappears for good."

"Now that's very Dan of you to say," PJ says lightheartedly.

 _Very Dan of me? Damn, they know me better than myself._

Dan brushes his palm on the log.

Love may be a messy feeling, but even without his memories, it's what he still has a grasp on.

* * *

 **SO SORRY FOR A WEEK WITHOUT AN UPDATE. *bows repetitively* I typed up the next chapter over Thanksgiving weekend though, so that should be coming to you tomorrow.**

 **PINOF 8. *dying whale noise* idk what people are saying about it not being too exciting. I loved the relaxed, easygoing, casual vibe of the vid. It represents Dan and Phil perfectly. But seriously, when Dan carried Phil, dead. xD**

 **I've been eager to write this chapter because I had the camp scene in mind for weeks. Bonfire Love Song by my teleserye bae James Reid was a song that played on my iPod one day and I thought, "I love this song so much. How can I fit it into IPY?" And thus this chapter was born.**

 **I intended to write the last scene with Dan and Phil, but I thought there weren't enough Dan and PJ moments. When I thought about it, I realized how PJ's crush on Christy somehow parallels with Dan and Phil's situation. But ugh, it's painful to write my two babies apart.**

 **Phan will win ya'll. This isn't the end of Hobbit Hair and Philly.**

 **~ AA**


	26. Familiarity and a Heart Tug

Chapter 26: Familiarity and a Heart Tug

Haiku

 _Your mind says one thing_

 _But your heart says another_

 _Which is definite?_

* * *

The new school year arrives. As difficult as it is for Dan to go through each day with 80% of his brain intact, he's fortunate for his partial memory blank to be ineffective of holding him back a grade level. His teachers for his 12th grade year were told about Dan's amnesia and understood if the brunette teen had any difficulties with the class material. Dan, however, refused to let his handicapped condition make him any inferior to his classmates. He's going to have to study a little harder and look back to old work from the previous school year, but as long as he gets to graduate on time, he didn't care about the extra effort he'll be putting into his new classes.

The senior class are aware of the accident. On the first day of school, several students give brief "get-well" statements to the injured members of the group. Hannah, Katie, and Jessica, whom Fiona had barely spoken to since the beach trip, are part of that category, While Fiona has to hold back from starting a cat-fight with Hannah when she does her usual flirts with Dan and Katie makes subtle snide comments about her "relationship" with Dan, Fiona is glad when Jessica makes the genuine effort to say nothing awful.

"I don't know what he knows or what you've been telling him, but it's not my place to mention anything," Jessica tells Fiona during their first period AP Calculus, a class that Fiona is relieved of Hannah not taking (according to Jessica, she chose to take AP chemistry for her AP credit to graduate with honors instead).

Fiona is grateful of the reassurance. So far, aside from the evil trio (it's how Fiona will refer to Hannah and her friends now that she has her real friends back, even though Jessica isn't exactly evil), no one in school have dropped any heavy hints about Dan and Phil's relationship. Whether they are respecting their privacy or assume that something is going on with him and Fiona, she hopes that the secrecy can continue for the remainder of the year.

The days roll by at a snail pace. For a school year that the friends once thought would consist of dances, college applications, and general plans for life after high school, their plans have been sidetracked since the accident. The camping trip, which the friends subconsciously hoped would bring Dan and Phil together, only increased the amount of lies that they have to make around Dan. Their lies are getting to the point where Louise has restless nights watching Korean dramas and Filipino dramas online so she could channel her frustrations elsewhere, Zoe is drawing slightly disturbing stuff in her sketchbooks, Alfie is drawing Phan stuff that he resists showing Dan and Phil, and Joe and PJ focus more on video games than schoolwork just so they could have that easy distraction. Even Ian and Anthony have taken upon themselves to stay away from the group more so they could keep their mouths shut.

But it's worse for the twins. Fiona's panic attacks are more frequent whenever she thinks about the looming date that she'll have to go with Dan sometime in the upcoming weeks. Phil is shedding enough tears before he goes to sleep every that can fill an entire swimming pool. Stress from senioritis is already difficult for them to manage; the stress of being liars is pushing them closer to their breaking point.

The dam could shatter at any moment, and when it does, they fear if Dan will forgive them for their fabrications.

* * *

~:~

* * *

The familiar bell dings above Dan and Phil's heads as they enter Dillion's. It's the second to last weekend of August. Phil doesn't have anything specific planned for the Saturday morning, and Dan insisted on having an intimate "best friend" day with the raven-haired twin.

"It's what best friends do, right?" Dan said when he first brought it up to Phil a couple of days ago.

 _It's also what we did when we were together._ Phil had added as an afterthought. He avoided going to Dillion's since he woke up from his own coma, and the thought of revisiting the place pains him. He can't think about his favorite music store without associating it with his memories spent with his love.

He can't call Dan his ex-boyfriend. They never broke up, and until things could be official between Dan and his sister, he can't exactly label Dan as his ex.

"Howell! Lester!" Summer greets from the registrar. "Isn't it your day off, Dan?"

"Yeah, but I feel like being a customer today," Dan answers.

"Ah, I see." She glances toward Phil. "Haven't seen you around lately. Busy with school?"

"Uh… sorta." _Don't say anything, Summer._ Phil told the blonde-haired employee about Dan's amnesia and confided in her about his sacrifice. Like their friends, she disagrees about his decision, but gave her word about not mentioning a word about their relationship. Phil feels awful about reeling in people outside the group to the lying game, but it's what he has to do to keep the ruse alive.

"You'll get through it," she assures him. "Besides, Dillion's ain't going anywhere. It'll always be here when you need it."

"Which we do for today," Dan says with a smile. "Phil's been so deep into school, so I thought a man date could help him out."

If Phil was drinking something, he would have choked on those words.

"Man date? I never heard any man say that before," Summer muses.

"We're just hanging out," Phil clarifies. "Can't two male 17-year-olds have a peaceful day to themselves without it being seen as a date?"

"I suppose…" She folds her arms on the counter. "But it's not like I haven't seen two boys become more than friends."

"You have friends that are a gay couple?" Dan asks curiously.

Phil makes a slitting motion with his throat. _What is she doing?_ "I'm sure you aren't the only girl in the world with gay friends."

"Well, I'm bi so you can technically call me your gay friend," Dan tells Phil.

"I can say that about Phil too," Summer mumbles, so softly that it would take a pair of acute ears to hear what she said.

Unfortunately, Dan picked up what she uttered and glances at the blonde, intrigued. "Phil's gay?"

Summer's mouth forms a small 'o.' "Ummm…"

 _Oh… Jesus._ This was what Phil was afraid would happen. With that single sentence, his elaborate master plan is about to fall apart.

Dan switches his glance to Phil. "You're _gay_?"

"I-I was kidding," Summer stammers. "It was a joke. I mean, I've seen you two hang out together a lot and I'm usually joking around how you two would make a perfect couple."

"Oh…" Dan says in understanding. "For a minute I thought you were implying that Phil and I were together. But that's crazy, right?"

"It is," Phil affirms. "We're just best friends. Sure, we act gay sometimes, but that's normal between close friends."

"That's true," Summer agrees. "You know what? Don't mind me. I'll shut up now and let you two spend your man time together."

Dan chuckles. "Still not a date."

 _But I wish it was._ "It's a date that's not a date."

"Are you pulling off a date-ception on me?"

"Maybe…"

Dan smiles. "So are you gay or not?"

Phil shrugs. "I dunno. I'm not looking for love, so I can't say for sure."

"So you're asexual."

"Nope."

"But you said you're not looking for love!"

"I said I wasn't looking for love. I didn't say I didn't want to be in love."

"Then… what are you?"

"Does it matter?"

Dan nods his head fiercely. "Of course! We're best friends. I have a right to know. Whether you're homo, het, or both, I don't care."

"So if I said I'm bi too, you'd be okay with that?"

Dan loops his arm around Phil's. "Definitely. Besides, there's always plenty of time after high school to find your meant to be."

"Aw…" Summer beams from the counter. "Remind me again why you aren't together."

Phil's face heats up. _This would be a really good time to shut up now!_ "Because Dan has his heart eyes on my sister."

"Alrighty." She bends down and lifts a stack of CD's that Phil didn't know was there when he entered the store. "I'll go put these in the shelves. Carry on."

Phil internally sighs. _That was a close call._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Wind chills the bare skin on Phil's arms as he trudges up the hill of the cemetery, gripping a small bouquet of white tulips. It has been a while since he went to Martyn's grave. With the paranoia that enveloped his brain since the accident, he hasn't been in the right mood to visit his deceased brother. However, school isn't too much of a hassle this weekend and Phil thought today was an ideal day to pay Martyn a visit.

"Hey bro," Phil croaks when he reaches the top of the hill. He situates himself into a cross-legged position inches away from the plaque of Martyn's grave. "Long time, no see."

As if Martyn could hear his words, another slight breeze brushes along his forearms.

"How's it like chilling with the big man above?" He places the flowers on the plaque. "Bet it's nice to be in heaven. Perfection above the sky, ya know."

He releases a drawn-out breath. Even though Martyn is gone, speaking aloud like this makes him feel like his older brother is right there listening to him. In a bizarre way, talking to Martyn is his source of therapy, his method of talking about his secret to someone that he doesn't have to fear about exposing to Dan.

"I miss you, man." A lone tear slides down his cheek. "I don't know what to do. It's been over a month since the accident. I'm dying a thousand deaths every day I'm not with Dan. Yeah, I'm aware that I'm being an idiot for choosing to let him go. You wanted Fiona to get over her crush on Dan, and I think she was starting to do so when we made up." He pauses for a brief second before continuing. "Am I doing the right thing? Will this pain ever go away? Will I ever be able to look at Dan one day and accept my choice of letting him go? Is it possible that I'll ever fall in love with anyone else and watch him be with the girl he deserved to be with from the start?"

A sob escapes his throat. The emotions he kept locked in his chest are coming out in a crying fit. Tears cascade down his cheeks and onto the fresh-cut grass. His hands cover his mouth in an attempt to rein in his cries.

 _"You've left a mark in my heart, and even when the tides carry it away, the memory of it can't be erased."_

How could it be that the last banter shared between them as a couple was a foreshadowing of their accident? If Dan's words were true, then Dan would have felt something toward him. Dan would have looked into his eyes hours after he woke up and sensed the everlasting love that radiated from Phil.

"What do I do?" Phil removes his hands from his mouth. "The right thing hurts so much, yet it's what causes less complications. I can't even tell what's right and wrong anymore. What if the wrong thing is supposed to be the right thing?"

He imagines how Martyn would respond to his rant. Probably with a 'You are such a fucking idiot. Just stop thinking about everyone else's happiness and do what makes YOU happy.' The thought makes him laugh a little. If Martyn was still here, he would have been a Phan shipper.

He tilts his head up and gazes at the sky. A cloudy blanket shields the sun, preventing his eyes from being blind.

 _"You only live once, so make the best of your lives."_

"I have one life," he murmurs. "Regardless of how it goes, I hope I'll still be happy anyway."

* * *

~:~

* * *

Behind a tree, a man dressed in black watches Phil in morose.

 _You are still young, Phil. Madam only wants what's best for you._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Annoyance surrounds Anthony's head as he strolls out of Hollister on a Wednesday night. After a long day of work, he's looking forward to ordering takeout, heading home, maybe talk to Fiona on the phone for an hour, and crash into an 8-hour sleep. Since the beginning of a new semester, his hours at Hollister have made him more exhausted, especially since there was an addition of a new co-worker.

"Ant!"

 _Ugh_. He thinks the universe must be having fun torturing him. Out of all the people to fil in Gabbie's slot after she quit, it had to be the one girl that he despised the most.

He continues walking, pretending as if he didn't hear her voice.

"Ant! Slow down!" She catches up to him, her blond hair flowing in the night air. "Why didn't you wait up? We're going the same way."

He gives her a tight smile. "I'm just tired. I have school tomorrow."

"So do I, but I'm still in a good mood."

 _Not me while you're here._ "You should be the one more tired. You're still a kid."

She huffs. "Oh please. I'm way more grown up than you give me credit for."

"Whatever."

"Are you normally this rude?"

"Are you normally this irritating?"

"I'm not rude. I'm just talking to you."

He rolls his eyes. "Nice try. Your idea of 'talking' is being all smooth so the guy is desperate enough to go to bed with you. But I'm not that kind of guy, Hannah. Find another fuck-buddy."

She pouts. "Do you really think that lowly of me? Don't forget, we are working together. I'd hate to let our manager think we're not getting along."

"So what? Shane's only seen me be nice toward you. He doesn't care what we are to each other outside of work."

"Well, I'm new to Hollister, so you should be nice to me."

 _I'm having a hard time the longer we're even having this conversation._

They reach the parking lot and Anthony is quick to stride over to his car. Whatever Hannah wants from him, she'll have to channel her interests elsewhere. He's allergic to girls like her who uses boys for her pleasure. He isn't a toy to be played with. He isn't someone that'll be hypnotized by her charm.

"Go home Ms. Conde," he says coldly to her. "Have a good evening." _And let the bed bugs bite._

"You too… Mr. Padilla," she replies in a sultry voice. _Bleh, I should've just went with Hannahconda._ Her eyes remain locked on him as he gets into his car, pulls out of the parking lot, and drives away.

It would be easy to quit his job, but he needs the money. Until he graduates and gets his dream career, he'll have to endure another couple of years at Hollister.

It's almost 10 PM by the time he arrives home with a full stomach of a Big Mac meal from McDonald's. The TV is off in the living room, which means that his parents must already be asleep. He's still in a bad mood following his conversation with Hannah, though that instantly changes as soon as he's in his room, lying in bed, dialing the number of the girl he waited all day to call.

"Ant," she greets warmly. "How was work?"

"If you subtract the queen of snakes, not too bad."

She chuckles. "I feel sorry for you. Sure you don't want to send in a resume to my boss?"

"I'm sure. If I'm lucky, maybe Hannah will go to college somewhere far, far away from here and will be gone by next year."

"We can only hope, bud."

He grins. "How about you? How was your day?"

"Fine, I guess."

He shifts his body so he's lying on his side. "How's things going with Dan?"

He can sense her biting her lip. Talking about her relationship with Dan is a heavy subject on the both of them. While he's aware of her wavering feelings toward the brunette, he can't resist the jealousy in his blood whenever he thinks about the two of them together.

"Nerve-wracking," she admits. "We're finally going on our date this weekend. I'm scared about what might happen. What if he kisses me? What if he asks me to be his girlfriend? I don't know how many more lies I can tell him. The guilt is too much and I want to tell him the truth and it's… it's… it's all so confusing. I-"

"Shhh…" he interrupts. "Calm down, Fi. This whole situation is hard on me too, but we're doing this for Phil. He's calling the shots, not us. I want you to go on that date and just be you. If he kisses you, let if happen. If he asks you to be his girlfriend, say yes. What's important is protecting him from the bad stuff he can't remember."

She sighs. "Yeah. Whatever happens, happens."

He smiles. "I'm here for you. You can talk to me about anything. I'm your friend, Ms. Lester."

"Ms. Lester? Where is this coming from?"

He shakes his head in amusement. "You don't want to know."

She giggles. "I have to go study now. Call me again tomorrow night, 'kay?"

He nods, even though he knows she can't see him. "Yup. Good night, Fi."

"Good night, Mr. Padilla."

His heart flutters. Hearing her call him 'Mr. Padilla' is a hundred times better than hearing it from Hannah.

He disconnects from the call and plugs his phone to his charger.

He closes his eyes.

 _One day, Fiona._

He's insane for being in love with Fiona, but as long as she's still single, his dream of her falling for him could still come true.

* * *

 **Damn. Wouldn't it feel so good if the truth was out in the open? This chapter is a little shorter since it's a bit of a filler. But next chapter will finally be Dan and Fiona's date. I have something major planned to happen during the date, so look out for that.**

 **In non-IPY related news, I'm watching this new teleserye called Langit Lupa that has completely captured my heart since the first ep. The story is all about friendship and wow you guys the two little girls who are the primary characters remind me of Dan and Phil. Idk if you can watch it online with subtitles, but if you can, you should give it a chance!**

 **~ AA**


	27. Connections and a Memory

Chapter 27: Connections and a Memory

Haiku

 _As the dots connect_

 _The lies can't protect the truth_

 _From unraveling_

* * *

Dan could hear nothing but his heartbeat as he waits outside the movie theater. It's a Saturday on the second week of September. Following weeks of postponing their date due to Fiona's responsibilities in Key Club and his commitment to relearning class material from the previous school year, the pair found time off this weekend and scheduled their first date on a Saturday afternoon. They opted for the new Tim Burton movie and a dinner at a new music-themed restaurant a few blocks away from the theater. He swore to Susan that he'll have her home by eight, so he was genuinely surprised when she brushed it off and told Fiona to be home at ten. Whether Mrs. Lester had been one hundred supportive of the idea of him and Fiona together since they met or she was willingly releasing her strict hold on her only daughter so she could have a normal teen experience, he didn't deny Susan's offer.

Either way, to Dan, it's his idea of a perfect date. The fact that it's the perfect date with the perfect girl makes it all the more perfect for him. _What could go wrong?_

He beams when he sees Fiona approach him to his left. Her red Converse high tops glides across the sidewalk in a way that reminds him of supermodels in lingerie commercials. Her raven hair is straightened so it reaches toward the upper curves of her behind. The simple pale pink blouse and bold red and white plaid skirt has him mentally salivating. It's a blend of nerd and girly-girl that only someone like Fiona could flawlessly pull off.

"Hiya," she greets, her voice bubbling in joy.

"H-hey."

"The movie starts in 15 minutes. Shall we go in?"

Still speechless, Dan can only nod.

 _Dear lord, give me strength so I don't fuck this up._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Sitting on a seat at the back of the theater, a man watches the two teens enter the room.

"Splendid," he mumbles. _Madam, you will not be disappointed._

* * *

~:~

* * *

Fiona's nerves are on edge during the movie. She's barely paying attention to the scenes playing on the projected screen. All her brain can wrap around is the different scenarios that could happen at any given moment. What if Dan grabs her hand? What if he tries to kiss her during a romantic scene? What if he asks her to ditch the theater in the middle of the movie? The third what-if is highly unlikely for Dan, but he's still a boy. It could happen.

 _Remember what Ant said._ She has to go with the flow. If she denies a romantic gesture from him, he'll take it as an indication that something is wrong. She and the rest of her friends have been doing well to contradict any suspicions that the brunette boy could potentially have. She can't allow the date to ruin their emotionally painful work.

Thankfully, due to Dan's naturally shy personality, he barely commits any action that arises any panic from Fiona. The closest is when their hands barely touch as they grab popcorn from the medium-sized bucket. Of course, the little gesture causes a blush to form on both of their cheeks, but it's nothing to cause alarm for Fiona. All the touch did was remind her of all the other accidental skin-to-skin contact she had with him prior to the accident.

Two hours later, when the movie is over, the two teens, in unison, release relieved sighs, followed by timid laughter.

"That was… an interesting movie," Dan comments.

 _Interesting? All I remember was the smack talk toward the end._ "Any movie from the great Burton is quite interesting."

He nods in agreement, then looks down to their half-finished popcorn. "You gonna finish that?"

She shakes her head. "I'll throw it away with our drinks when we go out. We still got a main meal ahead of us."

"It'll be a waste."

"I know. These buttery kernels are too delicious to go into stinky trash bags."

"Want me to give 'em to a homeless person?"

Her eyes light up. "Would you?" Even though she knows that Dan is an introvert, she could use the few extra minutes to gather her thoughts before they head out to dinner.

"Sure. Don't you want to see me be Mr. Nice Guy?"

"You're Mr. Nice Guy every single day," she says, smiling.

He picks up the popcorn bucket. "Lemme do one confident thing today. It's the least I can do."

She grabs their two empty drinks. "Oh, alright. I'll meet you outside."

The two part at the room's entrance. Fiona watches him disappear into the dispersing crowd, then makes her way over to the nearest trash bin. As soon as she tosses their drinks away, her gaze catches a man dressed in all black staring at her.

She freezes.

Every instinct in her body screams danger.

The man quickly averts his stare and rushes out the main entrance. She blinks. _Who the hell was that?_ She didn't get a good look at his face, and she's not sure if he was sitting in the same room as her and Dan while they watched the movie. However, there's something about the man that terrifies her, something that makes her think that he may know her and Dan.

 _It can't be though._ Why would there be someone stalking them? She hasn't done anything wrong to anyone lately. Sure, lies escape her teeth daily, though it's nothing that shouldn't catch the attention of anyone outside the group.

She leans against a wall for support. Her body trembles. _He's gone now. Calm down. You can't let Dan see you like this._ Seeing that man only added another problem on her ever-growing plate of troubles. She wouldn't know what to do if she spotted again, much less if he actually confronts her next time.

 _Will there be a next time?_ If so, what if he hurts her and Dan? She can't handle the thought of seeing Dan physically hurt again. Dan has already been through so much hurt, all because of her and her friends.

"Fi!" She looks up and sees Dan speed-walking toward her. "I thought we were supposed to meet outside."

"Yeah… sorry," she replies sheepishly. "I just needed a breather."

He steps closer to her and holds her hand. "Relax, okay? I'm nervous too. But it's just me. We're friends and I'm not gonna do anything you don't want me to do."

"No, it's not that." She squeezes his hand. "Dates aren't my thing, you know? We've hung out alone before, but never like this. I'm not used to being around you in a way where you may or may not kiss me when this is all over."

"Do you want me to kiss you?"

Her face goes redder than a pomegranate. "I… ummm… maybe?" She shakes her head. "Let's not think about that now. I'm starving."

His expression is evident that he wants to ask her more questions, but he drops the subject and nods. "I'm hungry too. Lead the way, Fi."

* * *

~:~

* * *

Hands shoved in his pockets, he dashes as fast as he can to the nearest alley.

Curse words ensnare his mind.

 _She saw me. Shit, madam's gonna hate me._

* * *

~:~

* * *

In a corner part of his brain, Dan wonders if it's more than date-related nerves that's affecting Fiona. She seemed more jittery since they left the theater and he noticed her eyes analyzing their surroundings, as if she expected a serial killer to jump at them. But it could be his imagination. Or maybe it's his own nerves that's causing him to think of these possible unrealistic things.

The pair are sitting at a semi-private booth in Persephone's, a restaurant that Phil suggested for him and Fiona to eat at when they discussed which place to eat at for their date. The restaurant has exceeded Dan's expectations. Like Fiona's outfit, Persephone's has a vintage and contemporary blended style that appeals to Dan's taste. Music from all generations reverberates through the speakers, and the waiters/waitresses are wearing such casual clothes that if it isn't for their nametags, Dan would've thought they too are customers.

A young man wearing punk-like clothing and looks to be a college student takes their order. Dan orders a hamburger with fries and a strawberry milkshake, while Fiona orders nachos with a side of curly fries and a vanilla milkshake. The entire time, the waiter looks at them knowingly, as if he could tell that the pair are on their first date in unusual circumstances.

"Well this is nice," Dan muses when the menus are gone and their food is served. "We should come here next time with Phil and the others."

"We should." Fiona picks up a curly fry, dips it in ranch, and bites into it. "This is way better than McDonald's."

"One hundred times better, and their Big Macs are delicious."

"Right? If fast food restaurants were built like Persephone's, I wouldn't mind coming to them every single day."

"But wouldn't you get fat?"

She giggles. "I'd rather be fat and happy than skinny and bitchy."

"Because there's already a lot of those kind of people around school."

"Not just school. Skinny bitches are everywhere."

"Then I'm glad you're not in that category."

"Uh-huh." She raises her milkshake glass in the air. "A toast to a more-than-decent first date."

He raises his own milkshake glass. "And for many more to come."

Their glasses clink and they grin at each other as they each take a sip of the sweet liquid treat through the straws.

In the midst of drinking their milkshakes, the music changes to a song that instantly makes Dan perk up.

 ** _Far away, this ship is taking me far away…_**

"Muse!" Fiona points out. "This place really does have good taste."

"Yeah…" Suddenly, Dan's head is muddled with a haze that he has never experienced. His mind drifts to an image of a concert stadium, filled to the brim with dozens of concert-goers. He sees a shadowy profile of Matt Belamy on stage with the band. The scene shifts, and he sees a familiar face that nearly makes him fall off his chair.

 ** _Hold you in my arms, I just wanted to hold you in my arms…_**

 _What's happening? This is… have I been here before? Why… do I see Phil? Is this a dream? Is this… a memory?_

He doesn't remember ever going to a Muse concert. It's an event that he has always wanted to cross off his bucket list. If he had attended a Muse concert in this town, with Phil no less, why didn't Phil tell him?

 _ **I will never let you go, if you promise not to fade away…**_

His hands has a peculiar urge to run to Phil, as if the song is directed toward the two of them. But why? Why would he have these emotions toward his best friend?

"Dan!"

 _What's the significance of Starlight?_ He listened to the song a handful of times since he woke up. None of those times evoked an response like this.

"Dan!"

 _What does Phil have to do with any of this?_

"Hey! Dan! Warn me if you're gonna go into la-la land, will you?"

Dan gasps, breaking out of his trance.

"Are you okay?" Fiona inquires.

Dan shakes his head. "I… this is gonna sound strange, but did I ever see Muse in concert?"

Fiona's widened eyes is the response that confirms his question.

"I did, didn't I? When?"

Fiona leans back on her chair. She's silent for a couple of minutes before she replies. "Ummm… sometime last December."

"Was I with Phil?"

She nods. "You bought him tickets as your Christmas present for him."

"I did?"

"Yup." She chews on a nacho. "I don't know what happened since it was only the two of you that went, but Phil told me when he got home that you two had a nice time."

He places his palms flat on the clothed table.

"Why didn't Phil tell me?" he demands in a soft voice. "I've been so fucking clueless for the last several weeks and only now I'm remembering something?"

"I-I don't know." She blinks. "I thought he mentioned it to you."

"He didn't, and that's why I'm freaking out."

"I see that. Dan, calm down. Don't cause a scene."

"I'm not causing a scene."

"You were about to."

"I'm fine! I just… we should go. I can't deal with this here."

She nods in agreement. "Let's finish our food though."

They finish the rest of their food in tense silence. Thoughts about kissing Fiona once the date is over has been pushed out of Dan's head. In fact, the thought of kissing her now makes him feel guilty. For some odd reason, the idea of doing anything romantic toward her doesn't feel right.

It's the uncomfortable transformation of feelings that lingers once they leave Persephone's, when he walks her home and merely kisses her cheek, when he heads back home in confusion.

Who is Dan Howell?

What kind of information is his friends withholding from him?

* * *

~:~

* * *

Back at Persephone's, a mop of light brown hair from a high school sophomore peeks from above a counter. Confirming what he saw, he ducks back down, pulls out his phone, and texts someone.

 ** _It worked… I think_**

The reply is almost instantaneous.

 ** _Almost is a start_**

* * *

~:~

* * *

Later that night, Phil is looking at Fiona at disbelief as she relays how her date went with Dan. The twins are in Phil's room, lying next to each other on his bed.

"No way," Phil breathes.

"Does it look like I'm joking?" Fiona sits up and glances down at her brother in concern. "I shouldn't have gone on the date. Dan's planning to come over tomorrow. You better have an explanation ready for him."

"What kind of explanation? Fi, if I tell him that it must've been a dream, he'll know something's up." His forearm drapes across his forehead. "God, out of all the songs that could've played, why was it that one?"

"Who knows? Coincidences are coincidences."

He groans. "Well, this is a fucking coincidence that damn sidetracked my plan."

"You swore," she says softly. "Are you mad?"

"Nah, not really. I'm more frustrated than angry." He removes his arm away from his face. The date was a day that he anticipated for weeks. It was a make it or break it, a day where he expected to mark the true end of his relationship with Dan. However, with the event that unfolded, the twins are about to face the repercussion of Phil's sacrifice.

"It can't be a coincidence," Fiona speaks. "What if that song was a sign?"

"Sign?"

She slaps her own forehead. "Bro, how dense are you? There are a gazillion songs out there, and out of all the songs the employees could've chosen to play, it was Starlight. _Starlight_ , aka your song with Dan. They could've played any Muse song, and the one song that popped up is the same song that brought you two together."

"Your point?"

"Stop lying to him, Phil." She gazes down at him tenderly. "This has gone on long enough. Our friends are getting tired keeping your secret too. Do you know how hard it is for me to convince Dan that he fell in love with me? Do you know how hard it is to see people at school looking at me with pity because they probably think you broke up with Dan sometime during the summer and he's now going after me? Do you know hard it is to be loved the wrong way?" She sighs. "Dan's getting suspicious and you promised me you'd give him answers once he starts asking questions. Well, he's gonna do that tomorrow."

Phil lets out his own sigh, one that releases the agony that he buried in his chest for weeks.

He made a commitment to Fiona.

He broke their childhood promise. If he broke another promise, then he deserves the title of 'Worst Twin Ever.'

"How will I tell him?" he murmurs.

She grins. "Take him back to the start."

"What?"

"Through music, silly!" She falls back down on the mattress. "Do something music-related. That's how you two began and that's how you two should find your way back to each other."

A slow smile curls on his lips.

He knows exactly what to do.

* * *

~:~

* * *

Rage ignites in her irises as she glares at him with an intensity that nearly makes him want to run out the door.

"YOU IDIOT!" she bellows.

"M-madam." He kneels down and stares down at the floor in shame. "I-I didn't see this coming."

"Neither did I." She grits her teeth. "I was ready to forgive you when Fiona saw you, but a _memory_? I cannot let that pass!"

"Dan and Fiona are still close," he attempts to reassure her. "Aside from the memory, the date still went well."

"It would have been perfect if you didn't screw up," she hisses. "Because of you, they might tell him the truth."

"Or they might not. Madam, we can fix this."

"How?"

"I'll find a way."

"Find out who played that song," she growls. "If it's someone I know, he or she will have to answer to me."

He nods. "Yes madam."

She faces away from him, her eyes fixated on the front door.

She crosses her arms.

 _Dan, Fiona, Phil… I will make this right. I will fix what's broken. I will break what never should have been._

* * *

~:~

* * *

The voices from his parents' bedroom piques Dan's curiosity when he exits the bathroom. He has finished his nightly routine and was on his way to his room when he heard a hushed conversation emanating between Simon and Tabitha.

"Do you think it's time to him about Johnathan?" Tabitha questions.

Dan pauses. _Johnathan?_

"It's not a bad idea," Simon responds. "To be honest, we should have told him the day when he woke up."

Dan presses his ear to the locked door of his parents' room. Their exchange is too valuable for him to miss.

"It would have overwhelmed him," Tabitha disagrees. "And I have respect for Phil's decision. He was very mature for coming to us and asking to keep the affair a secret."

 _Affair…? What affair?_

There's silence on the other side for several seconds before Simon resumes the discussion. "An affair is a secret itself. But Phil did have a point. Troubling Dan with the affair could have led to serious consequences."

"If only we weren't in this predicament."

"Hon, no one asked for our son to have amnesia."

"We have the worst luck."

"But none worse than the Lesters."

 _Affair? Johnathan? Wait… are they talking about Phil's… father?_

"We should speak to Phil first," Tabitha suggests. "If he thinks it's safe for us to tell Dan about Johnathan and I, then we'll do it."

 _Johnathan and I?_

Dan covers his mouth to muffle his gasp.

 _Mom… and Mr. Lester?_

"I'll text Phil before I go to work in the morning," Simon agrees.

With shaky knees, Dan backs away from the door and stumbles to his room.

 _Are my parents lying to me too?_

* * *

~:~

* * *

A blank CD is inserted into Phil's laptop as he searches through his iTunes for the songs to burn into it. It's 2 AM and Phil made it a mission to not fall asleep until he finishes what he's doing. Next to him, Fiona is asleep, her hair fanned across his bedsheets. Following their conversation, she wanted to spend the night in his room. It has been a while since she fell asleep on his bed. He can't pinpoint the last time she had done this.

He tangles his fingers in her hair, stroking the long raven strands. _I'm sorry for what I put you through._

He loves Dan, but that love will never compare to the love that he has for his sister.

Yawning, he centers his attention back on his laptop screen.

 _I'm gonna need a caffeine boost soon._

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's 1 PM on the Sunday following Dan and Fiona's first date when Dan barges through the unlocked front door of the Lester residence. He has a dull headache after the lack of sleep he had from last night. He was unable to stop thinking about the affair that was mentioned between his parents. If his assumption his true, then there's a likelihood that perhaps his unknown past isn't coming back to him due to the people that he has been learning to trust over the last couple of months.

"Phil and Fiona Lester!" he calls out. "Get the fuck over here!"

He doesn't care if he's sounding like an immature teen. Today, his mission is to learn if all the things that occurred yesterday were clues to getting his memories back.

At first, no one shows up. Dan taps his shoe-covered foot impatiently on the floor _. If they don't come down in the next two minutes, I'm going upstairs myself._

Following a few minutes of restless tapping, Fiona finally dashes down the stairs, wearing an oversized t-shirt and ripped denim shorts and her hair tied in a loose ponytail. His confusion momentarily disappears when she sees the CD gripped in her right hand.

"Phil's still asleep" are the first words that escapes her mouth.

"Can you wake him up? I want to talk to the both of you."

She shakes her head. "He fell asleep really late. If I were you, leave him be."

"Give me one good reason why."

She shows the CD to him. "He was awake almost all night making this for you."

"Why?"

"You want your memories back? Here." She grabs his wrist, opens his hand, and places the CD on his palm. "Listen to all the songs Phil burned. Even if this doesn't help you remember anything, it does hold the answers you're seeking."

He peers down at the CD. There are about a dozen of songs written in blue ink on the inside cover.

 _ **By My Side (Cassidy Ford)**_

 _ **Absolute (The Fray)**_

 _ **Dead Wrong (The Fray)**_

 _ **Fall Away (The Fray)**_

 _ **Iris (Goo Goo Dolls)**_

 _ **See You in my Dreams (We the Kings)**_

 _ **Two is Better than One (Boys Like Girls)**_

 _ **I Hate Love (Claude Kelly)**_

 _ **Starlight (Muse)**_

 _ **Everything (Lifehouse)**_

 _ **Nine in the Afternoon (Panic at the Disco)**_

 _ **Anywhere But Here (Mayday Parade)**_

 _ **Count 'Em One, Two, Three (The Maine)**_

 _ **Breath (Hatsune Miku)**_

 _ **Magbalik (Callalily)**_

 _ **Your Love (Juris)**_

"Starlight's on here," he comments.

"Obviously. It's your song with Phil?"

"Our song? What do you mean?"

She shakes her head. "Can't kiss and tell. That'll ruin the surprise." She pushes on his shoulders, attempting to drag him out the door. "Phil was supposed to give you this in person, but when I woke up, he left a Post-It on the fridge telling me to give this to you on his behalf."

"O… kay. But did he really stay up that late just for this?"

"He did it for you." She rushes past his side and opens the door. "Phil cares about you more than you think, so trust him on this."

 _I don't even know who to trust anymore._ "And you're sure I'll have some lightbulb moment once I listen to these-" he counts the number of songs on the list, "16 songs?"

"Cross my heart and hope to die."

"You swear?"

"I swear."

"Fine then." He walks out the door. "Thank Phil for me. And tell him I might text him tonight if I can get through the entire CD."

"Sure thing." She frowns. "I'm sorry by the way."

"For what?"

She looks at him sadly. "For the answer you'll be getting. Your memories will hurt you more than you know."

* * *

 **Don't you guys love me again? Or not. You're the judge.**

 **This longer chapter is to make up for the filler-ish last chapter. Dan's starting to find clues for his memories and Phil's finally having the guts to reverse his decision. Get ready for Phan to return next chapter. And listen to the songs while you're at it! Tbh the two songs from The Maine and Mayday Parade were a last-minute addition while I typed up the rest of the chapter last night. As for the 2 songs with foreign lyrics, you can look up an English translation on Google. That's how I learned the meaning of those songs.**

 **… Who saw Dan's photo of him wearing all black yesterday? Because wow that entire outfit was a reflection of my emotions atm.**

 **On a different note, I've been getting to know someone in my creative writing class who reminds me a lot of Dan. He loves rock music (he has a soft spot for Green Day), is a very deep thinker (you should've heard his rant about his love for McDonald's Big Macs that made me think of Shane Dawson's vid when he ate that gigantic BM lol), is very sarcastic (sarcasm is life), and often wears black or band-t-shirts (he even has a jacket that resembles the one in Dan's "outfit" and ya'll know which outfit I'm referring to). We get along well, and idk I just thought it's a cool tidbit from my personal life to tell you guys.**

 **~ AA**


	28. Very Important AN

Yo. So... I have a confession to make: I didn't start working on the next chapter of IPY yet.

*stands stock still as you throw tomatoes at me*

It's been a rough several days for me. I was supposed to start on the chapter last weekend once finals were over, but I was in an extremely miserable mood. I... was in a relationship with someone, but we broke up on my last day of finals. If you guys want to know the details, leave me a review and I'll explain it all in the ending A/N of the next chapter. The worst part of it all was that this boy was the one I mentioned in my ending A/N from the previous chapter. *insert crying emoji* We actually got together a couple days after I posted that chapter, dated for about a week, and broke up. The details of why may convince you that we shouldn't have broken up.

In general, I haven't been in a fanfic writing mood for my multi-chaptered fics. I've been trapped in a rollercoaster of emotions that it wouldn't be fair for you guys to post a chapter that doesn't meet your standards.

I swear to you all, starting today, I'll get to writing the next chapter. If things hadn't happened the way it did, that chapter would've been posted by now. I'll try to get the next chapter done and have it posted around Christmas. If my creative juices flow better, I may even have 2+ chapters ready to post by then.

I'm so sorry lovelies. :'(

BUT. I'll give you a general outline on what's supposed to happen in the next chapter. This is what I consider to be a very, VERY happier chapter after all the longing and what-not on the previous chapters.

\- Dan and Phil will revisit the log cabin  
\- Dan will learn the truth about his relationship with Phil  
\- Zoe and Alfie will go on a hiking date  
\- More moments with Anthony and Fiona  
\- Someone will learn about Simon and Stephanie's relationship

~ AA


	29. Second Times and a Truth

Chapter 28: Second Times and a Truth

Haiku

 _For the second time_

 _I'll let go of my deep fears_

 _To let true love win_

* * *

Dan is curled in a somewhat fetal position on his bed. He has his laptop set aside, iTunes opened up and paused midway on Anywhere But Here. For hours, he was cooped up in his bedroom, doing nothing but listening to the songs that Phil burned in the CD. It took him about 90 minutes to listen through the entire playlist, and once he went through the first playthrough, he couldn't stop listening to the whole CD on repeat. The only times he got out of bed was when he had to use the bathroom and eat leftover pizza for dinner.

He listened to the lyrics of each song carefully. He searched up English translations to Breath and Magbalik. He tried to piece together whatever message that Phil is trying to tell him. He willingly suffered through headaches in his attempt to force himself to remember something, anything, about Phil aside from the Muse concert. At this point, he's one hundred percent sure that the Muse concert wasn't a dream. It's real. It's a memory. Several months ago, he saw Matt Belamy in person, listening to a love song next to a boy that he's no longer sure is merely his friend.

 _We weren't a couple… were we?_

The songs are pointing him in that direction. Every song in the CD is about longing or something bittersweet about love. Love. Love, as in romantic love. Love, as in the four-word emotion that he once believed didn't exist for people like him.

It's as if the songs are meant to tell him a story, a story that he hasn't been able to fully piece together yet. However, he has a general tale that only surfaces more questions in his ever-increasing puzzlement.

Him and Phil were together in some way. Maybe they were casually dating, or maybe they were in a full-fledged relationship.

Whatever they were, it was kept a secret. From whom, he can't tell.

They must have been deeply in love.

Perhaps they had a place they went to for their secret meet-ups. They were their own version of Romeo and Juliet, minus the deaths.

The accident happens, which must have hurt Phil more than the physical wounds he suffered from. Phil learns that Dan has amnesia, and thus chose to withhold any information about their relationship, adding on to more agony that Phil kept to himself.

But why? Why would Phil do that? If Phil truly loved him, he would have said something as soon as he woke up. Was it for Fiona? He couldn't exactly blame Phil if it was for that reason. He's aware of the looks that the female Lester gives him. He sees love in each and every one of those glances.

Maybe people didn't approve of his and Phil's relationship. Again, it would make sense. Who wouldn't be disgusted of seeing two boys kissing in a school hallway? The world is cruel for its cruel people.

However, it doesn't add up to what he heard his parents discussing behind his back. Assuming Tabitha and Johnathan were in their own secret relationship, why didn't his parents tell him? If there was an affair happening under his nose, he has a right to know. Are they still together? If so, how could his own father accept it?

A sudden burst of anger stirs in his chest. He could be outright wrong about his inference, but it's still a strong possibility. There were enough pieces in his parents' conversation for his prediction to be true.

It doesn't change the fact that there was an affair involved. Two people were involved in a cheating scandal, and it had a profound effect on him, an effect that he no longer remembers. What if that effect was the reason why him and Phil kept their relationship a secret? What if that effect could have been the reason why he has amnesia?

He grabs his laptop and clicks the play button on his iTunes.

 _ **Secret love, my escape**_

 _ **Take me far, far away**_

 ** _Secret love, are you there?_**

 _ **Will you answer my prayer?**_

 _ **Please take me anywhere but here**_

 _ **Anywhere but here**_

What if the affair was the reason he and Phil got together? What if being with Phil was what helped him cope with it? _What if the affair was a good thing?_

He groans.

The what-if's are dragging him back to square one.

He unplugs his phone from his charger and dials Phil's number.

* * *

~:~

* * *

In the Lester household at 11 AM, Phil has his eyes glued to his phone. He has been waiting for Dan to text him all night. He could've been the bold one and done it himself, though he already did enough damage to the brunette's memories. He did everything that he could to cover up his tracks. He practically had to breach through Dan's privacy in order to keep his ruse going on for as long as it did.

Taking back any item he gave to Dan when they were together.

Transferring romantic photos of the two of them together on Dan's phone and laptop to Phil's electronics (they were that close to give each other the passwords to their electronics in case something happened to either of them).

Deleting the iTunes playlist on Dan's laptop that he used to create the CD he gave to Phil on prom night.

Swallowing his pride and Facebook messaging popular people to spread the word about not mentioning his relationship with Dan to Dan himself once school resumed.

Other unmentionable actions that hurts him to think about.

 _I did it all for you._ He took drastic actions and paid the emotional consequence.

He squeaks when he feels his phone vibrate in his hands. He instantly slides the green icon to the side without reading the number on the screen.

"Dan," Phil greets nervously.

"Hey Phil. Did I wake you?"

"No. I've been up watching Death Note." _Lie_. He stopped watching anime on Crunchyroll nearly an hour ago.

"Good… I need to talk to you."

Phil lies back on his bed. "So Fi gave you the CD."

"Yup."

"Listened to all the songs?"

"Yup."

"Are you mad at me?"

"Mad wouldn't be the word I'd use."

"What word would you use?"

"Confused."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize. I'm glad I'm at least one step closer to finding answers."

"Yeah." Phil brushes his unoccupied hand along his bedsheets. "Did the songs help you remember anything?"

"Not really," Dan replies. "I played Starlight the most and all I can remember are the things I remembered while I was in Persephone's."

"So… still blank?"

"Blank as a white blank page."

"Since when did you start listening to Mumford and Sons?"

Dan chuckles. "Blame Adrian. I think he's starting his angsty emo teen phase early."

Phil smiles. For a topic that's supposed to be serious, he's glad that Dan is sprinkling in his usual sarcasm.

"Tomorrow's Sunday. I don't have any plans," Dan says. "Would you want to meet up so we can talk properly?"

"Sure!" Phil answers brightly. "I mean… sure, if you want." Phil imagines Dan shaking his head in amusement from his response.

"Great. I'll meet you at 10?"

"Why not earlier?"

"Phil, are you questioning my sleeping habits?"

 _Don't I always?_ "10 it is."

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Dan's hands are shoved in the pockets of his black athletic shorts as he and Phil walk along the path of a forest. Exercise is on his list of things he'd never do on a Sunday at mid-morning. _Since when did hiking become a routine at 11 bloody AM?_

"Are we there yet?" Dan complains. "I'm starting to think you're doing this to lure me to a dungeon."

"Dan, the only dungeon I know is Dungeons and Dragons."

"Whatever." Dan doesn't mean to sound like a prick, though having his limbs doing more leg work than he felt like doing is making him irritable.

"You wanted us to meet, and where we're going is the best place I can think of for you to trigger your memories."

"Where exactly are we going?"

"You already asked me that."

"I'll keep asking until you answer."

Phil stops walking. "Stop asking and look ahead."

Dan pauses, squinting his eyes from the sunlight. "What am I supposed to be looking at?"

"You don't see it?"

Dan takes several more steps forward. Understanding dawns on him when he spots something that definitely doesn't look like a tree.

"What's that?" he questions.

Phil grins, jogging to catch up to Dan. The raven-haired boy grabs the brunette's hand.

"C'mon."

Phil is dragging Dan along the path when Dan speaks. "What are you doing?"

"Taking you home?"

"Home? Phil, are you drunk? I left my house over an hour ago."

"I'm talking about a different home."

Dan ignores the dull warm sensation of Phil's touch as he decides to go with the flow. _Maybe he is drunk. I've never seen Phil look this happy before._

A couple minutes that seem to stretch on for hours later, the two boys reach a clearing. Dan's mouth hangs open at the sight of the raggedy, but rather elegant, log cabin meters away from him.

A split second later, the warmth from his hand spreads throughout his entire body, only the warmth isn't comfortable.

It feels as if he's being burned alive.

He lets go of Phil's hand.

"Fuck," he whispers.

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Concealing his presence behind the exact same tree that Fiona hid behind months ago, a man with his signature binoculars watches the exchange between Dan and Phil.

 _NO! Madam… She's really going to chop my balls off._

He silently sobs. For the first time, defeat is in his absolute horizon.

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Somewhere at a different environment of nature, Zoe and Alfie are walking up a mountain. It's the exact location where Alfie made his candid appearance in the Sugg family bonding, the place where Zoe subconsciously realized she was in love with Alfie. At the time, her stubbornness clouded her feelings for her lovesick best friend, but she no longer has that resistance in her chest. Like the log cabin is for Dan and Phil, the top of the mountain can be their own safe haven.

"Thanks for coming here with me, lady love," Alfie says, his hand squeezing his girlfriend's. _I could be hiding in a dumpster with her and I'd still be the most happiest man on earth._

"Aw, you know I'd do anything for my buffoon."

"Dunderhead… slave… idiot… buffoon… you're never gonna stop running out of pessimistic nicknames for me, aren't you?"

"Sure thing, Alfredo."

"I'll take buffoon." Being called by his full first name is worst than all the terms that Zoe has called him over the years.

"'Alfredo' too much to handle?" she asks teasingly.

"Nah… you know you can call me Alfredo anytime."

They continue walking until they reach the top of the mountain. Sweat dripping from their foreheads and temple, Alfie leads Zoe to the same boulder where he sketched Zoe during that hiking trip. He hasn't released her hand once since the start of the trek, and even though his clammy palm is begging for air, he's reluctant to ease his grip on his girlfriend.

He waited years for her to give him a chance. He's making up for lost time that she wasn't hating his guts.

"I think you were lying about coming here 'just because,'" Zoe declares. When Alfie suggested going on a hike for their next date, she had wondered if there was a particular reason for doing so. She assumed it was his desire to make up for the last time they did a hike. That reason is partially true, but for a hopeless romantic like Alfie, he has more up his sleeve.

"You aren't wrong."

"What could be a better reason other than to make more memories on what's now my favorite mountain?"

" _This_ is your favorite mountain? Aren't there other more mountains way more beautiful than this one?"

She scoffs. "Beauty is nothing if there's no meaning behind it." She releases his hand to loop her arms around the bend of his arm where his elbow is. "This mountain has meaning. Therefore, it's just as beautiful as Mt. Everest."

"You have a point."

"Alfs, I can be just as romantic as you."

"I know… but you've always been the deeper one between the two of us. I'm only deep when it comes to love."

"Hey… at least you're deep. I wouldn't be able to say the same for a lot of guys at school."

He smirks. "I can be deep in other places."

She gasps, slapping his elbow. "Alfie!"

"I'm kidding!" _But you aren't saying no, so point for me!_

"You can be deep in that way, but not now."

He smiles innocently. "So if I gave myself to you as my Christmas gift to you, you'd probably say yes?"

"Christmas is three months away."

"But would you?"

She blushes. "Maybe."

His cheeks matches the same shade of red as her. Even though he's always teasing about being physical with her, he feels terrified of the act itself in the inside. As eager as he is for balls and tacos to be one, he has no bed skills whatsoever. He's not a sex god and isn't like some of the guys at school who gives their reproductive organ away like candy. He read through the porn magazines of the Suggs' father. He's guilty of watching porn videos nowadays to deal with his "ache" when he's not with Zoe. He may talk like a perv, but he'd have to eat those words if he's forced to act like a dog in heat.

"We can wait, you know." He presses the side of his body closer to her. "We have the rest of our lives to be together. We don't need Christmas or Valentine's Day or senior prom or graduation to be a deadline for when we do the dirty. You're the only girl that's ever gonna be in my life, and if I have to wait until I'm in my deathbed to pop my cherry, then so be it."

She giggles. "Did you make sexual references without saying a dirty word once?"

"Were you looking for me to slip 'dick' in there somewhere?"

"Dear god, you're so cheesy."

"The cheese is real, sweetie."

Still giggling, she leans her head on his shoulder. "Since you're cheesy, mind telling me the real reason for this date?"

"Oh right!" He shrugs off his backpack, unzipping it to take out a copy of Rupi Kaur's Milk and Honey. "I was at Barnes and Noble last weekend and found this. I read through it, actually cried, and bought another copy yesterday. It's so good and there's some stuff in here that remind me of us."

"Awww… you didn't have to spent 20 bucks for a novel," she says, taking the book from him.

"It's a poetry book. And it only cost 15 bucks."

She leafs through the pages. "What are the poems about?"

"Love. Heartbreak. Female independence. Really, really deep stuff I'd want Dan or Phil to read."

She sighs. "Are you kidding me? Those two need all the help they can get."

"Help? They need Jesus."

"Jesus must be asleep, because he ain't doing his job to get those two back together."

He lays his hand on her thigh. "Those two are true love. When the time is right, they'll be back into each other's arms."

"When?"

"Let's leave it to Fate to decide when."

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Dan clutches at the soft cotton of his shirt. Wave upon wave of nostalgia fills his circulatory system. His palms sweat. His head is dizzy. His heart races a million beats per minute.

It's all too familiar, and he doesn't know why.

"Dan," Phil says softly. "Anything ring a bell?"

His mind flashes with a variety of scenes.

Him walking the exact forest path he went through earlier.

Him and Phil running around outside the cabin.

Him and Phil hugging.

Him and Phil kissing.

Him and Phil telling each other "I love you."

He doesn't know if all of these scenes occurred within the same day. Either way, the onslaught of images in his head are all brand new and he's certain that these aren't dreams.

 _Then that means… the concert wasn't a dream._

Everything in his head now are memories.

His memories are returning.

"You're my boyfriend," Dan breathes.

Phil gulps, gazing at Dan solemnly as he nods.

"How long have we been together?"

"Since the end of February."

"So we've been together for… six months?"

Phil nods again. "Fiona does like you, but… you've never returned her feelings."

Dan closes his eyes, holding his head in his hands. He doesn't know how much more of his newfound memories he can take. _I don't like Fiona? I like… Phil? No wait, I LOVE Phil._

"Why didn't you say anything?" Dan questions, opening his eyes and staring at Phil angrily. "All this time, I was walking around with a blank fucking mind about my life here. I cried every night, begging God to at least remember _something_ about my time here, even if it was a lecture in one of my classes."

"I-I wanted to tell you," Phil stammers. "I was just waiting for the right time."

"RIGHT TIME?" Dan seethes. "When did you think the right time was? Next month? Next year? _Next lifetime_?"

"I'm sorry." Phil moves closer to Dan so their bodies are touching and their faces are centimeters apart. Phil lays his hand on Dan's shoulder. "I know it was wrong, but I was doing what was best for you. We were so happy, but our happiness came at a cost. There was the bad in addition to the good."

"Like an affair, huh?" Dan laughs bitterly. "Mind giving me any hints about that?"

Phil gasps. "You know?"

"So you're admitting there was an affair. Or _is_ , for all we know."

"Dan…"

"TELL ME THE FUCKING TRUTH!" Dan shrieks. His voice startles surrounding birds, who fly away at the sound of his raised tone.

"Okay fine!" Phil's crystal blue eyes turns glassy. "Before we got together, your mom and my dad were seeing each other in secret. My mom found out, got really mad, and they broke up so they wouldn't hurt anyone else. My dad's been trying to make up with my mom, but things haven't been the same. He's been living on his own in an apartment so he wouldn't be have to fight with my mom all the time."

"Living on his own? That gives your dad more opportunities to sneak around!"

"I know, okay?" Phil places his palm on Dan's cheeks. "But they're adults. It's their decisions. My dad's a good man, so I know he's doing his best to keep my family together. He loves your mom. He gave up love for my sake."

"What does your dad know about love?" Dan spats, attempting to back away from Phil's touch. "If Mom loved your dad, she wouldn't have cheated on my dad."

"But you can't control love," Phil reasons. "Just like how we couldn't control our feelings for each other."

Dan clenches his fists. Phil lied. His friends lied. Even his own family lied. Everyone he cares about lied to him, and for what? To keep him safe? For his own good? _Bullshit. I'd rather know I'm a serial killer slash assassin than be betrayed by those close to me._

"I didn't tell you any of this because I love you," Phil says. "I love you too fricking much to subject you to remember the horrible things that happened since you moved here. It wasn't my choice nor yours to fall in love with each other. But we did, and it hurt Fiona. I made a promise to her and I broke it. She avoided me for weeks and we only made up on the day of the accident."

"Wait, what promise?"

"A childhood promise." Phil moves his hands to settle on Dan's waist. "I promised her we'd never let love come between us. It was during a time when our parents' fights were getting bad and I wanted to do something for her to make her happy. We didn't know if our parents would divorce, so I made her that promise so she'd know I'd love her no matter what happens to us."

Dan's lip trembles. Anger remains flowing in his veins, though pity is beginning to form. He's starting to understand why Phil chose to feed him lies about their relationship and the relationship between their parents. Phil didn't just want to do what he thought was best for Dan; he did what a person would do for their love. Phil did what a typical teen would never do and sacrificed their romantic love for the love from his family. _Like every Asian drama Louise keeps talking about._

"You may not remember loving me, but I know your heart remembers," Phil whispers, tears finally spilling from the raven-haired boy's eyes. "I promise… I'll tell you everything. I'll tell you what you want to know and really help you get your memories back. I don't care if you don't want to be my boyfriend anymore; I care about seeing the old Dan back. Hobbit Hair has to come back."

"And what if he doesn't?"

"He will," Phil says firmly. "Daniel James Howell, I promise to get rid of your amnesia. I won't promise to get you to fall in love with me again, because I can't force your heart to love someone who's been a gigantic liar to you. But I do promise to help you remember our love, and when you do, it'll be up to you to decide if you still want there to be an us."

Dan's chest aches at the sight of Phil's tears. Phil's right: his heart does love him. Despite his mind still being glued to Fiona, he can't ignore his feelings for the male Lester. He can't discard the temptation to kiss Phil Lester.

Which Dan ends up doing anyway when he impulsively snakes his arms around Phil's hips and presses their lips together.

Phil squeaks, but Dan doesn't care. Dan kisses Phil the way he would've kissed Fiona during their first date. However, this kiss feels much more right to him, because it's a kiss that he must've had with Phil countless times before the accident. Their lips mold together in a way as if they were never separated in the first place.

Phil sobs against Dan's neck when they pull away. All Dan can do is hold Phil close to him.

"I love you" is what Dan wants to say, but his mind knows that he can't speak those three fragile words yet.

He'll say them again when he remembers all the reasons why he loves Phil.

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Fiona cradles Phil's head on her lap. She wants to cry with him. For the last half hour, Phil told her everything that happened between him and Dan at the cabin: how Dan recovered more of his memories, how Phil told Dan the entire truth, how Dan was livid at Phil for being selfish to hide his identity, and Dan's overall confusion of his feelings.

"He loves you," Fiona murmurs, brushing her fingers along his cheek. "Dan wouldn't have kissed you if he didn't love you."

"He kissed me because of the moment!" Phil wails. "If we weren't at the cabin, I bet he would've slapped me and left me standing there like some cliché movie scene."

"You and Dan are anything but cliché."

"Are you trying to help me or make me feel even more awful?"

Fiona stares up at the ceiling. After Dan's unexpected kiss, Phil told her how Dan asked to take him home as soon as they made a short tour around the inside of the cabin. As much as Phil wanted to spend the rest of the afternoon fulfilling his promise and telling Dan about the things he hid, he had to respect Dan's space. Dan is most likely overwhelmed by the new information and needs the rest of the day to process it all.

"He's mad at me." Phil presses his cheek on his sister's thigh. "He's probably hating me more for what I did and thinking about finding new friends."

"He wouldn't do that."

"It's Dan. Who knows what crazy things go on in his head?"

"He doesn't hate you," she assures him. "He's definitely mad, but he doesn't hate you. He can't hate you. You're the love of his life."

" _Was_ the love of his life."

"Stop talking in past tense, bro. Dan wants you just as much as you want him. Just give him time."

"But time is our enemy," Phil counters. "Time could've made him stay in a coma longer. Time could've prevented our accident. Time is what ran out for Martyn. Time is a curse, Fi. I bet time is what'll make Dan realize he should've fallen in love with you over me."

"Love doesn't work like that."

"It's how it's working for adults."

Fiona strokes the strands of Phil's hair.

 _Why is fate so screwed up?_

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Anthony is on the brink of unconsciousness when his phone pings with a text. He has a feeling who it is before he unlocks his phone screen.

 _ **Fiona Lester: can I call u?**_

Instead of texting her back, he dials her number.

"Ant," she sobs.

His exhaustion fades, quickly replaced by concern. "Fiona, what's going on? What motherfucker do I have to kill?"

"No one."

He waits a few seconds for Fiona to calm down before he speaks again. "Did Hannah or Katie get to you again?"

"No… it's about Dan."

"Dan?"

"He remembers."

"He does?" Anthony exclaims.

"Phil told him everything when they were at the cabin."

"So… does Dan have his memories back?"

"Some of it. He only remembers his relationship with Phil."

"Are they back together?"

"Not really. I don't know. Phil told me he doesn't even know if Dan still thinks of him as a friend."

Anthony sighs, rubbing his forehead. "How about you? Are you doing okay?"

"I'm doing my best to be."

"How do you feel about them being a couple again?"

"Glad. Disappointed. Gah… this is too much."

"Hey, you have me."

He senses Fiona's smile. "Yeah… I'm glad to have you, you know. I'm lucky I met you and Ian that day in Best Buy."

"You're like a best friend to me, Fiona. I'd do anything for you."

"I'd do the same for you. But really. Thank you for sticking around. You've always been here for me, even though you've got way more beautiful girls worth your time."

"Ms. Lester, you and Mari are the only beautiful ladies I need in my life."

"Still… thank you."

"You don't need to thank me." He yawns. "It's what friends do."

"Yeah…"

He senses an underlying emotion in her voice. _It's not… nah._ Fiona doesn't love him.

"Go to sleep, Ant. You're tired."

"Aren't you tired too?"

"Yeah, but I can manage."

"Sweet dreams, Fi."

"You too, Mr. Padilla."

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Eyes closed, Dan hears his phone vibrate. Mumbling a curse word, his hand blindly reaches for his phone. He finds that it's a text from Fiona.

A long text that has him momentarily wishing she had one of those old phones that only allowed the 140 character max count.

 _ **Fiona Lester: Spoke to Phil. I'm not mad, ok? I still really like you, but don't mind me. Tbh I think I was already starting to get over you when we went out. Most likely the guilt lol. But yeah. Give Phil a chance. He loves you more than all the stars in the galaxy. See you at school. - Fi**_

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Dan's presence at the front lawn of the Lester residence the next morning stuns the Lester twins when they open the front door. They were on their way to school, Fiona choosing to forgot carpooling with Ian and Anthony to walk with Phil to school. She didn't want to leave Phil alone, and she wasn't sure how he'd react when he sees Dan. She wants to be there for Phil when it happens. If the worst occurs, someone has to be around to act as mediator.

Phil ducks behind Fiona, even though he's a couple of inches taller than the female Lester. "Pretend I'm not here."

"He can see you, bro," she tells him. "Go. I'll walk to school."

"Don't leave me," he whimpers.

"I'm not leaving you." She pats his shoulder. "I'll leave you physically, but not emotionally."

"Dan's gonna kill me!"

"No he won't. You and I know he isn't capable of killing a bunny."

"That depends… what bunny are we talking about?"

"Is that even important?"

"Uh… guys?" Dan calls out.

Phil adjusts back into an upright position, his head peeking over Fiona's. Dan waves at them, his facial expression seemingly pleasant.

"Do you have a lethal weapon on you?" Phil blurts out. He mentally facepalms. _Idiot! If Dan had a gun, he would've shot you by now._

"The only lethal weapon I have is the one inside my jeans," Dan jokes.

Phil's face warms. _Maybe he should be carrying a gun after all._

"On that note…" Fiona says in a sing-song voice. "I'll go on ahead. Have fun, boys."

Phil's cheeks are still red once Fiona is out of eye and earshot and he's left standing on the lawn with Dan. The brunette approaches him, hands in the pockets of his black coat.

"Isn't it a bit too hot to be wearing a coat?" Phil asks.

Dan shrugs. "Haven't worn it in a while and I felt like going all black today."

Phil nods. "So…"

Dan cuts right to the chase. "So when are we going back to the cabin?"

Optimism ignites in Phil's stomach. "You want to go back there?"

"Why not? I haven't memorized the trail yet."

"Thought you wouldn't wanna go back so soon."

"You made a promise though." A corner of Dan's mouth curves up. "I have birds to apologize too."

Phil chuckles. "We'll go after school."

 _We're gonna be fine. We're gonna give Phan a rebirth._

* * *

 **Gaaaaah! Worth the wait, huh? Phan is back, albeit them being somewhere between more than friends and being a couple. I made this pretty long to make up for being absent for 3 weeks. I was also supposed to write about who learned about Simon and Stephanie's relationship, but I decided to push that over in the next chap instead.**

 **Thanks to you guys for the support of what happened between me and RL Dan. We actually got the chance to chat on Facebook Messenger a little over a week before. WE'RE FINE. More than fine actually. We're… honky-dory. Does anyone still use that phrase nowadays? Lolol. I haven't been online since the day I chatted with RL Dan. I'm feeling the insanity of being internet/socially deprived.**

 **RL Dan still feels like shit for breaking up with me, especially since he hasn't been able to contact "her" (she's under her own home lockdown apparently), so he was glad to talk to me when I was online. We talked about where our feelings lie. We're like best friends now. He thinks having me in his life is one of the best things that ever happened to him. For me, having him in mine gave me a chance to meet someone who understood me for me. After all, not all of us stumble upon that one special person who changes us for the better. We've implied there could still be an us someday, but for now, we're content with our tight-knit friendship. He truly is my Dan in terms of that darkish boy who resonates with my soul.**

 **Anywaaaaay… that experience opened my eyes to a world of relationships and it's definitely gonna help with writing the rest of IPY. If I channel my own complicated love story into this complicated plot, then whooooo you've got yourself a recipe for success. Or disaster. Take your pick.**

 **If it's New Years from where you're at when I'm posting this, Happy New Year! May 2017 bless us with more luck, more Phan moments, and me hopefully finishing this fic soon because welp I think this'll be the longest Phanfic on this site by the time I mark this as complete.**

 **~ AA**


	30. AN: Where I've Been

Hey guys. So I've been on a hiatus for the last few months and I'm pretty sure many of you are wondering where the hell I've been. Rest assured, I haven't given up on writing. What I have been doing is taking a break from the fanfic writing world to focus on college. It was difficult to resist my writing temptations, but I knew I had to put school first. I didn't have a good balance on my school and fanfic life last semester. As a result, my grades suffered. I failed my microbiology lecture course and got a D in my general pharmacology course. Granted, I got an A in creative writing, but it's science I have to excel at to keep my dreams of pursuing a nursing career alive.

In other words, I focused so much on my fanfic writing that I sort of shut off the real world. If it wasn't for my boyfriend, who I've been dating for the last three and a half months, I wouldn't have remembered my reason for pursuing a medical career in the first place. I would've given up and became a hermit in the next few years or so. I wrote a bit of poetry and read fanfics on my own time, but other than that, my mind was focused in studying for exams and stuff.

My finals are coming up, and once that's over, I'll be back to fanfic writing. I'll need a bit of time to refresh on what I've written so far, but once I get comfortable, I'll be back to a relatively regular updating schedule during my summer break. For OPR, I'll upload longer chapters since there's only 4 more chapters I plan to update. For IPY, I'll try to upload the final several chapters in bundles of 2 until the epilogue. Once I finish those 2 fics, I have a few new plot bunnies (both for one-shots and multi-chaptered) I've been itching to write. I'll get to writing them during the summer while I study for my ATI-TEAS exam (aka this testing I gotta do to apply for my college's nursing program).

Please be patient with me! I apologize for the long absence. Just wanted to drop by and tell you I'm not dead haha.

See you in a few weeks with new chapters!

˜ AA


	31. Revenge and a Twin's Jealousy

Chapter 29: Revenge and a Twin's Jealousy

 _Haiku_

 _Mysteries surface_

 _When grown women are consumed_

 _By their secret sins_

* * *

Reconnection: how does one describe the lengthened term? A term that hasn't gone well with adults, but working its magic for teenagers? Reconnection is the weakness for people who let their grudges command their entire beings, but it has become the strength for people making the effort to carve a new beginning.

The weeks following the revelation of their relationship, Dan and Phil have been making up for weeks of separation. Whenever they're not at school, working, or hanging out with their friends, they're in the serenity of their log cabin. Each day, Phil would reveal a new memory of their time together as a pair. He would talk about the times when Dan would drop by to Leroy's just to see him (and Fiona too), when Dan would recommend indie rock music he'd find while scrolling through Spotify, when Phil would be amused with Dan's victorious stances whenever Dan won at a video game. At any given moment when he remembers a fond memory he shared with Dan, he'd tell it to the brunette teen. He hopes one of those memories will be enough to trigger the entirety of memories that Dan has lost.

Through Phil's memory tales, Dan grows closer to wanting to tell Phil he loves him. His stomach feels warm when dreaming of the countless kisses they've shared. He thinks of their cabin as a symbol of what their future could be like after high school. His best friend, the first person he truly bonded with when he moved to their hometown, could most likely be his forever first love.

But there's no rush. They have all the time in the world. Dan isn't going anywhere, and Phil refuses to utter another lie to Dan.

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

It's a weekday in mid-October in the Howell residence. Simon is in the bathroom taking a shower, getting ready for work. Tabitha is in their bedroom, searching through their closet for clothes to wear for the day. Dan and Adrian have already headed off to school. Tabitha is planning a casual morning alone at home with a couple of hours to see Johnathan in the afternoon.

Tabitha is lifting a hanger of a navy blue blouse when she hears her phone sound off on the drawer with a notification. She leaves the hanger with her blouse on the bedsheets and goes to check her phone. It's for an email from her personal Gmail.

"What is going on in your crazy mind today, Johnathan?" she mumbles in amusement. The only emails she receives on her personal Gmail (she has a separate one for her clients) that she reads are for Facebook and Instagram notifications or from her close friends. Out of her close knit of friends, Johnathan is the only one who prefers sending her frequent emails. Erica and Eliza are more accustomed to texts, calls, and seeing each other in person.

However, it's not Johnathan that the email is from. It's from someone with a Gmail address that she doesn't recognize: **_ahughes_**.

 _Must be spam._ She could transfer the email in her spam tab, though the email is in the primary section. Surely the email must have some importance.

She taps on the email, and she immediately feels lightheaded by what she sees.

 _This isn't… this can't be true._ She clutches her stomach, feeling her breakfast could come back up at any second. I _t's a mistake. That's not him. That's not Simon._

The email is labeled with "no subject," though there's a single sentence typed in the body. **_Those you trust should not be trusted at all._** Below the sentence is an attachment of four photos.

The first photo is a clear angle of Simon and a woman with chestnut-colored hair kissing on a couch. Tabitha can't recognize the woman at first, though she thinks the woman looks familiar.

The second photo is Simon and the same woman sleeping half-naked on a bed. Her head is buried atop his chest, so Tabitha is still unable to place a definite identification of her. Tabitha assumes the location all the photos were taken in a same apartment space, presumably one rented by the woman.

The third photo is an explicit photo of Simon and the woman. The pair, naked, is on the same bed in a sexual position. Through watery eyes, Tabitha is tempted to log out of her Gmail. However, she pushes herself to tap on the last photo, curious if it'll finally show the woman's face.

It does, and despite the nonsexual content of the fourth photo, the betrayal punches her all the same.

It's a portrait photo of Stephanie Milton, her husband's PA and someone she'd least expect having any romantic involvement with Simon. From the few times Simon has ever spoken about Stephanie to Tabitha, he talks about her as someone who's reliable and competent. Tabitha viewed her as a woman who's serious about her job, not the type who sleeps around with married lawyers.

"Hon?"

Tabitha shakily places her phone back on the drawer. _Now isn't the right time to talk to him about this._

Simon approaches Tabitha whilst tower-drying his damp hair. "Are you okay?"

She nods, forcing a smile on her face. "Sorry, I have a difficult client and their demands are a bit too much for me sometimes."

He drops the towel on their bed, then pecks her cheek. "Don't worry too much. You can do this."

"I know." She presses her cheek on the crook of his neck. _How many times has Stephanie done this to Simon before?_ "Thank you."

"Of course, sweetheart." He kisses her cheek again. "I have to go. I'll see you at dinner?"

"Dinner," she affirms. _Unless you'll be eating dinner with Stephanie first._

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

She stares at the whiteboard of photos and red ink-wash markings. Her plan is set. She may have failed with her scheme for Dan, Phil, and Fiona, though what she tried to do to them doesn't compare to the bigger plot she has in mind. She doesn't mind that things didn't go in her favor involving the three teens. After all, her final plan is meant for the people who wronged her in ways more than two siblings and their lost male friend.

If a miracle bestows upon her, her plan could indirectly push Dan and Fiona together.

"Susan." Wade enters the room, carrying a plate of various fruit slices. "I mean… madam."

"You may call me Susan." She whips her head toward her assistant. "You've served me well, so I give you the privilege to call me by my real name."

"Yes… Susan." He presents the plate to his boss. "Hungry?"

"Not now."

"Do you wish for me to prepare something else?"

"That won't be necessary."

Wade sets the plate on the table, moving to stand on Susan's right. "What are your next plans?"

Susan takes a step back from the whiteboard. "This is going to work, Wade."

"What did you do this time?"

"Well… remember when I asked you and Bruce to do an investigation on Mr. Howell and Ms. Milton?"

He nods.

Susan's lips curl into a sinister smile. "I've sent them to Tabitha."

Wade gives her a dumbfounded expression. "For what reason, madam?"

"To make her suffer."

"Madam… no offense, but wouldn't this possibly put you in danger? What if Tabitha traces you as the sender?"

"Then it doesn't matter. If she finds out I'm the one that sent the photos, then that's that." She crosses her arms. "If she comes after me, it won't matter. As long as she ends up with a bullet through her head, my goal will be accomplished."

"You want to _kill_ her?"

"Uh-huh. And Johnathan too."

"Your own husband too?" he sputters. "Madam, isn't this going a little too far?"

"Nope."

The last several months prepared Susan for her final plot. Initially, her schemes only involved small ways of influencing Dan's feelings. Around her family, she played the somewhat supportive mother of her son's relationship. When they're not around, she conspires with Wade, a friend of her uncle, to make attempts to separate Dan and Phil. She tells Wade or one of her "minion men" (courtesy of Wade) to spy on the two of them and report back to her. It was through the countless spying that enabled her to intercept the friends' beach day. Bruce, her second in-command, was meant to merely drive his car to scare Dan and Phil into thinking there's someone out to get them. Unfortunately, Bruce miscalculated how much they'd try to avoid his car. His tiny mishap nearly cost the lives of her children and their friends.

When the accident had put Phil's life in the precipice between life and death, she deliberated stopping her secret plans. She was ready to accept Dan and Phil as a permanent couple. Then Dan woke up from his coma with amnesia, and the sly gears in her brain moved once again. She took advantage of his partially-blank brain and resumed her desire to make Fiona and Dan a couple.

If only their friends didn't get in her way. She was so close to getting what she wanted, until that song played during Fiona and Dan's date. Whether the song was played coincidentally or on purpose, it was enough to break through Dan's amnesia. Dan is completely aware of their relationship and they're more likely to get back together.

She hasn't completely failed. Failing to do Fiona a favor in her love life led Susan to realize that she should focus her scheming on the people who wronged her first. It isn't a bunch of teenagers she should go after; it should be Tabitha, the woman who stole her husband, and Johnathan, the man who never loved her the way she wanted him to.

So here she is, in Wade's home with Wade himself, about to tell him how she plans to kill Tabitha and Johnathan. Having Wade take the revealing photos of Simon and Stephanie was the first step to her plan. She suspected Simon of having an affair with someone when she once saw him hugging a woman outside of his workplace far longer than a man and a woman who aren't a couple should be doing. She didn't do anything about it at first, but once she decided on taking revenge against Tabitha and Johnathan, she requested Wade and Bruce to spy on Simon. As she suspected, Simon was indeed secretly seeing someone.

Susan didn't intend to include Simon in her plans, though his secret benefits her. His affair is fuel to the hurt that Tabitha will face. It's more emotional hurt that she'll carry with her until her death. _And Johnathan? It will sadden me to see him go, but at least they can be happy together in hell._

"How do you want me to kill Tabitha and Johnathan?" Wade inquires.

Susan shakes her head. As safer as it is for Wade or one of the men to take care of the bloodshed for her, she'd be much more satisfied if she did this job herself. She wants the ultimate satisfaction of being the one to end their lives, the one to hold the weapon (a knife to the heart is adequate for her killing standards) she'll use on them.

She wants to watch them beg her for mercy.

She wants her face to be the last face they see.

She smiles. "You've done so much for me. Let me do this for once. All I need from you is your cooperation."

"You have my loyalty, madam."

"Wade…" She lays her left palm on his cheek. "Can you do me a favor?"

"What is it?"

"Don't call me madam anymore." She steps closer to him, pressing the front of her body to his. "Just call me Susan."

"Susan…"

"Shhh…"

 _If John cheated, then I can cheat too._

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Johnathan's mouth is a gaping fish when Tabitha shows him the email. The two are sitting side-by-side on a couch in the lobby of the hotel where Johnathan works, eating pastries that Johnathan bought for them at the café right outside the hotel. Johnathan is unable to believe that what Tabitha is sharing to him is true. _And WE were seen as the bad guys?_

"This could be photoshopped," he theorizes. "The sender could be a photoshop expert."

"Maybe… but I don't think so." She puts her phone down on her lap. "Why is this happening? Simon came back to _me_ , forgiving me for what we've done. He was angry at me. But I understood his pain. I understood how hurt he was. I mean, I was the one who willingly ruined our marriage." She sighs. "Then he does _this_ to me? It's not right!"

"I know it isn't." He drapes an arm over her tense shoulders. "But we have to understand how Simon feels. If he and Stephanie are having an affair, they could've started when he found out about us. What if he felt so hurt and went to her for comfort?"

"So you're saying… they fell in love with each other during the entire time he was gone?"

"Maybe they're not in love yet. But I'm definitely sure there's something going on between them."

"That doesn't help me feel any better."

"I'm only stating things that might be facts," he says sheepishly.

She leans her head to the column of his neck. "I'm sorry I'm ruining your lunch break with my problems."

"Don't be sorry. I'm more flattered than bothered you wanted to tell me first instead of Erica and Eliza."

"I was going to tell you no matter what. To be honest, I was going to tell you first."

"Why?"

"Because I can tell you anything, even if we're not together anymore."

 _If only we are still together._ If they were, the pain they'd cause to their families would've been far worse than what they faced all those months ago.

"What are you going to do?" he questions, savoring the tender moment he's sharing with Tabitha. It's one of their friendly positions that fondly reminds him of their time as secret lovers. Until now, he hasn't let go of his feelings for her. He doesn't think he ever will. She made a positive impact in his life since he met Susan. She's his reason for not divorcing his wife and leaving his children. When he chose to be selfish and dream about the two of them having a legal future together, she chose to be unselfish, to live in reality and love her family more than him. Even if Susan didn't discover their affair, she would've eventually ended their relationship anyway.

Those are the reasons why he loves her. It's why he swallows his selfishness when he's with her so he could behave like a proper friend to her, the kind of person that he should have always been to her.

Instead, he let his desperate plea for love take over.

"I want to find out who sent the email," she declares. The moment ends and she shifts on the couch so his arm falls away from her shoulders.

"How?"

"I'll email this person back."

"What if this person doesn't email you back?"

"I'll keep emailing him or her until I get an answer."

"What if this person deleted their account after the email was sent?"

"We go to a hacker."

"You know any hackers?"

"Eliza knows a guy who works in IT. Maybe he might help me."

"And if he says no?"

"Johnathan, do you not want me to find this mysterious sender?" she says, exasperated.

He shakes his head furiously. Perhaps he shouldn't be asking all these questions. "I'm just looking out for you. What if this person is stalking you and wants to kidnap you?"

"I can look out for myself. Trust me, okay?"

"Tabitha…"

 _"Trust me."_

"I… fine."

Her shoulder slump, losing a bit of the tension that was there for the last several minutes. "I won't let Simon get away with this. I have to find out if he really deserves the title of a good husband."

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Fiona, Louise, Zoe, and Jessica are singing along to music from Beyoncé's recent album. The four girls are in Jessica's blue Volkswagen, Jessica driving them to the mall. It's a Wednesday after school and the three main friends were in the mood to do some window-shopping. Jessica, who Fiona has grown close to lately, asked the black-haired girl to join them. Aware of her somewhat disconnected friendship with Hannah and Katie, Fiona wanted Jessica to get a glimpse of what real friendship is supposed to be like. She can tell that the way Jessica behaves around Hannah and Katie isn't who she really is.

Jessica has a huge grin on her face once the girls arrive to the mall and they exit her car. She speaks to the trio as if she has always been a part of the group. _Maybe her bitchiness is only an act._

"You have fantastic music taste," Zoe praises Jessica.

"Thank you! Beyoncé will always be my queen."

"How many Beyoncé albums do you have?" Louise asks.

"All of them," Jessica says.

"Then you're just as queen as the queen herself," Fiona states.

Jessica's cheeks flush. "Oh, stop."

"You are! Much more of a queen than Hannahconda and Killjoy Katie." Fiona has never said the evil trio's nicknames aloud, but with how much Jessica is getting along with her friends, it seems like now is a good time to bring it up.

Jessica raises an eyebrow. "Is that what you call Hannah and Katie when we're not around?"

"Too much?"

"Nah. Those are so clever. What's mine?"

"Uh… I don't have one."

"Why?"

"Because I never saw you as that bitchy to deserve one."

"Thank you?"

"I don't get it." Zoe glances at Jessica. "How could someone so cool stand being around Hannah and Katie? I can't look at them for five seconds without hypothetically puking."

Jessica chuckles. "Me neither. It's a long story actually."

Louise leads the girls to sit on a bench in front of Hollister. "We have a couple of hours." Louise winks at Fiona. "Anthony can wait."

 _Keep dreaming, Lou. Ant is only a friend._

Jessica stares at the girls thoughtfully. "Are you sure you want to know?"

The trio nod in unison.

"How bad could it be?" Louise asks.

"Is it bad if I say it'll make you feel bad for Hannah?"

"What do you mean?" Fiona says, confused. Fiona hadn't met the evil trio until high school, so she doesn't know too much of their lives from elementary and middle school. Fiona assumed that because of Hannah's wealthy status, her constant pampering is the reason why she's self-absorbed.

Jessica crosses her legs, then unravels a tale to the girls that, indeed, puts a new perspective on Hannah.

"When we were kids, Hannah, Courtney, and I were the best of friends. Our families were good friends, so it was natural for us to be friends too. We'd always play together at recess, eat lunch together, and even make friendship bracelets for each other. We were inseparable and we promised to be best friends forever. But we were so young. Our promise of being BFF's ended once we went to middle school. That was when we met Katie.

She tried to be our friend on our first day of middle school. She knew Hannah and I came from rich families, so she thought it was natural for her to join our group. We were open to meeting new people, so we let her be our friend. I thought she was nice at first, till I started noticing how she treated Courtney. Katie would always talk to her like she's trash and invite us to 'rich kid places' that would make her feel uncomfortable. Courtney noticed too, and we told Hannah about it. But she didn't believe us. She thought Courtney was jealous because she didn't come from a rich family and me because I wasn't giving opening up to Katie enough to see her as a good friend. We didn't take Hannah's accusations lightly.

For a few weeks, Courtney and I stayed away from Hannah and Katie. We were too mad at what Hannah told us. We hung out with Olivia, Noah, and Keith since we used to sometimes play with them in PE in elementary school. But it was because of them we forgave Hannah for lashing out at us. After all, she was our best friend and the one really at fault was Katie.

By the time we went to ask Hannah to be our friend again, she completely changed. Whatever influence Katie had on Hannah turned our best friend into a Katie clone. She spoke like she was the queen of everything and we're supposed to bow down to her and all that shit. Courtney nearly started a cat fight with Katie, so I held her back. We didn't want to stoop down to Katie's level.

Courtney and I didn't know what to do. We didn't want to ditch Hannah and leave her with Katie. But we also couldn't handle being with the new version. So Courtney compromised and told me to join Hannah and Katie while she stayed with Olivia, Keith, and Noah. She wanted me to look out for Hannah since Katie tolerates me better than her. She didn't mind staying away from us, because as long as I'm with Hannah, there was a chance she could go back to who she was. I was a key to reminding her she's a good person.

Together, Courtney and I staged this huge fight between us. Olivia pretended to be dating Noah and spread this fake rumor about Courtney trying to steal him from her. Since I 'knew' about Olivia and Noah's 'relationship,' I was angry that Courtney could do such a thing and confronted her outside in front of a bunch of students. I yelled at her, called her a boyfriend-stealer, all that kind of stuff. Then Hannah and Katie came to see what was going on. I slapped Courtney and told her I won't be her friend anymore because of what she did and she was like, 'Fine! Because the only other friend we have is gonna turn out to be a fucking whore!' Hannah stepped in, said some nasty stuff to her to defend me, and then I walked away from her with Hannah and Katie. Hannah apologized for being mad at me. She persuaded me to join her and Katie, and pretending I was desperate to get away from Courtney, I agreed.

Courtney is still my best friend. Hannah thinks I hate her, but c'mon, I could never stop being a friend to someone who actually deserves to be my friend. We'd contact each other through text or social media and hang out when we're sure Hannah or Katie wouldn't see us together. At school, we play the image of ex-best friends. Any time Hannah catches us looking at each other, we'd just look like we're having a glaring contest.

You can blame Katie for why Hannah is a bitch. But she's not a bitch all the time. Fiona, it's true she despises you because you're just as smart as her, you talk back at her when she snarks, and you're super pretty too. But she's also really jealous you have a bunch of loyal friends who won't backstab you. She only has me and Katie. Minus Katie since she'd trade her friendship with Hannah for a diamond ring. When she saw you sitting alone after the school found out Dan and Phil were together, she was concerned about your well-being. With what happened with Courtney, your argument with your friends reminded her of our middle school years. She thought she'd be doing you a favor if she let you temporarily join us. I mean, she said she could use this as blackmail and it'd get her closer to Anthony once she met him at the party, but she cares, even if she doesn't really show it."

Fiona blinks several times once Jessica finishes with her story. _HANNAHCONDA ISN'T A CONDA?_ Her academic rival, her top nemesis, the one who's capable of making anyone's life miserable… those things wouldn't have happened if it weren't for Katie. If Jessica and Hannah never met Katie, Hannah would've been the type of girl that Fiona could see as friend material.

"Wow," Louise says in shock. "That explains so much."

"Yeah…" Jessica shrugs. "It's a burden I've carried for quite a long time."

"You've never told anyone else?" Zoe asks.

"There's no reason to." Jessica eyes the entrance to Hollister. Fiona follows her gaze and, through the transparent glass, witnesses Anthony laugh at something that Hannah says. She can't determine if the laugh is genuine or out of nervousness. Whatever it is, it makes her wish she's the one making him laugh instead of Hannah.

Jessica continues eying the store. "Wanna know why else Hannah doesn't like you?"

"Why?"

"No matter how many times she tries to get Anthony to like her, it doesn't work."

"Obviously. Ant isn't that stupid. He isn't the kind of guy to easily let a girl into his pants."

Jessica chuckles. "Hannah's been able to get into pants of those kinds of guys before."

"Why am I not surprised," Zoe mutters.

"She's doing everything at this point, and nothing." Jessica smiles at Fiona. "Almost as if he's waiting for a different girl to get into his pants."

 _A different girl?_ "And who would that be?"

"You."

Louise squeals, clapping her hands in delight. "I knew I'm not the only one who sees it!"

Jessica giggles, her smile morphing to a grin. "Just like how I knew Shayne had the hots for Courtney-" Jessica nudges Fiona's shoulder, "Anthony has the hots for Fiona."

Blood rush to Fiona's face. _No fucking way. Anthony doesn't like me. That's impossible. He's my friend. I'm three years younger than him. College kids don't fall in love with high schoolers. I bet he thinks the idea of even falling in love with a girl like me is ridiculous._

"In what way do you think Anthony wants me as more than a friend?" Fiona manages to say.

"There's a ton of reasons," Zoe starts. She uses her fingers to indicate every reason she gives. "One, he's always giving you those heart eyes Dan and Phil do to each other all the time. Two, he didn't stay away from you when you were mad at us. Three, he said yes to being your prom date. Four, he doesn't mind listening to your problems. Five, he never went out with a girl since you two met. Six-"

"Maybe you're looking at it wrong," Fiona interrupts. "Those heart eyes could mean he only really cares about me as a friend. He couldn't stay away from me cause he probably didn't have a choice. Who'd wanna see me more mad than I already was? He only agreed to be my prom date cause I'm his friend and that's what friends do for each other. He listens to my problems because, again, that's what friends do. And he's naturally awkward around girls."

Louise shakes her head in amusement. "Are you listening to yourself, Fi? All your counters keep going back to 'it's what a friend would do.' But look at it this way: he might be doing all these things as your _friend_ because he thinks that's what you'll ever think of himself as. You liked Dan all this Dan. And you said he's awkward around girls. Wouldn't this be enough for him not to pursue you?"

"It's a silent guy code," Jessica adds. "A good guy will never go after a girl who he knows is interested in someone else."

"All signs point to yes," Zoe teases.

"That's what Keith is like to Olivia too," Jessica brings up. "No one's blind to the fact Noah and Olivia love each other. They're too shy to say it to each other, and Keith could easily confess his own feelings for her, but he won't because he doesn't want to hurt Noah and he'd get shot down anyway."

Fiona is silent. Her friends' claims definitely makes hers inadequate. Anthony never complained whenever she had her Dan rants. He'd listen and try to understand her. He, along with Ian, looked out for her when she hung out with Hannah, Katie, and Jessica. _What if he's actually doing those things out of love?_

"We're right," Zoe muses. "Anthony likes you, and there's no way you aren't gonna like him too, if you don't already do."

"I-I don't like Anthony," Fiona stutters, slightly caught off guard by Zoe's prediction. "I like Dan, remember?"

"Liked. You told us you were starting to get over him. Besides, that's what I said about my dimwit too."

"But you and Alfs had years of friendship. I've only known Ant for like a year."

"Then it might take you years to fall in love with Anthony too."

"I'm gonna fall for Ant when I'm 30? Nuh-uh, I'm not waiting for another dozen years till I'm finally with my Mr. Right."

"Damn, now who's the dense one?"

"I'm not dense. I'm only saying what's true."

"It may be true now, but it won't be someday."

"Who's being dense?" Sometime during their exchange, Anthony walked out of Hollister to join the girls. He squeezes between Fiona and Louise so he's sitting to Fiona's left, the side of their bodies pressed against each other.

"Ash Ketchum," Fiona bluffs. "Y-You see how he's oblivious to how much Serena likes him."

"O…kay."

"What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be working?"

"I wanted to come see you girls for a few minutes. Steve and Hannah are holding the fort till I come back inside."

"Ant!" _Or just Steve now._

Anthony softly groans. _At least Jess isn't wrong about Ant not letting Hannahconda into his pants._ "Hannah, why are you here?"

Hannah looks at him with a smug expression. "What's wrong with wanting to say hi to my friends too?"

 _Fuck off._ "Hey Hannah."

"Hey, miss goody two shoes." The smug expression falters from Hannah's face when she notices how close Fiona and Anthony are sitting.

"I thought you said you and Steve would take care of the customers," Anthony tells Hannah.

"Steve looked like he's got things under control, so I followed you out here," she replies. "It's time I took a little break too."

 _I need a break too… from you._ "And speaking of breaks, I need to use the restroom."

Anthony frowns. "I have to go back inside soon."

"It won't take long."

"Your bladder can wait," Jessica says, glancing between Hannah and Fiona.

"It can't." Fiona rubs her thighs together to make it seem like she needs to get to a toilet as soon as possible.

"No, you're right." Anthony pushes lightly on Fiona's arm. "Go now so you can get back before my not-so-break ends."

Fiona smiles at Anthony thankfully, gently patting his thigh. "I'll be back in five." She jumps off the bench and rushes to the nearest women's restroom, which isn't too far from where the group is.

She gulps heavily once she's inside a restroom stall.

 _The fuck?_

Why is she feeling as if she wants to retract her words about not liking Anthony?

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Tears are streaming down Stephanie's face as her shaky hands hold a white item that confirmed a fate that she wasn't ready for. All week, she crossed her fingers for her suspicions to be false. She hoped her morning sickness was due to a food allergy or the chilly autumn temperatures. She hoped her missing period was due to stress spent in the office. She hoped her food cravings was her subconscious method to distract herself from her feelings for Simon. All of these hopes were to help convince her that the impossible couldn't be possible, but as she's staring at the white item, her hopes are dying.

The white item drops into the sink. Her legs give out and she collapses on the bathroom tiles.

She presses her face on her bent knees. _My life is ruined._

She didn't intend for this to happen. Her love for Simon couldn't possibly survive after this. She should have told Simon about the mistake that happened a few weeks ago. They had too many drinks during a night out at a bar with their co-workers. They were completely drunk and had unprotected sex. The next morning, she purchased some Plan B once her hangover subsided. Her panic disappeared once she swallowed the pill.

Her panic is a million times worse than that night. The solution for this situation involves eliminating the life in her belly. A second test will only confirm what's already true.

"What am I going to do?" she whispers. _What if Simon leaves me? Maybe I shouldn't tell him. I can fix this... Fuck, listen to yourself, Steph. You're really thinking about killing your unborn child? A child with a father you love?_

Will Simon take responsibility of their child? Could she go through with an abortion? Is she ready to be a mother? What if she'll have to be a single mother? Does she have enough money to raise her child by herself? The emerging questions adds more alarm to her predicament.

She has to tell Simon the truth. He deserves to know he's going to be a father. She'll figure out what to do afterward.

Sniffling, she gets up from the floor. She picks up the pregnancy test off the sink, tears off a portion of toilet paper, and places the white item on top of it.

She doesn't look at it for the rest of the evening.

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

At the exact moment that Stephanie is processing the results of her pregnancy test, over at the Lester residence, Fiona is thinking about her afternoon at the mall. She thinks about who Hannah was before they met and her odd emotions when Anthony came out to join her and the girls. Had Jessica not mentioned her opinion of Anthony possibly having feelings for her, would the thought of even wanting Anthony as more than a friend ever reach her head?

"He'd be a good boyfriend," she muses. Anthony has the same qualities she saw in Dan. He's funny, kind, and loyal. He's one of the first people she talks to when she has something weighing her mind. Their nightly phone calls usually helps her fall asleep. All the things that they're doing now would easily carry over if they ever crossed the boundary from friendship to romance.

She wouldn't mind if Anthony becomes her boyfriend. However, just because she perceives him as an ideal boyfriend doesn't mean she likes him. Her current thoughts are merely reflecting possibilities, not to her emotions itself. If Anthony likes (or is in love with) her, then she can't do anything to defer those feelings away.

That's the major question: does she like Anthony Padilla? Would there ever be a day she'd learn to fall for him? _What if I do like him and I don't know it?_

She yawns. Her hangout with the girls had made her tired. Anthony and Hannah was back inside Hollister by the time she exited the restroom earlier, though that only motivated Jessica to drag them into the store so they could steal more minutes with Anthony. She did feel a speck of jealousy seeing Hannah and Anthony working so close together, but it could've also just been mild annoyance of typically watching Hannah being all over her male friend. Despite the revelation of who Hannah was in the past, she hasn't removed Hannah's title of being her nemesis.

Love was a dramatic rollercoaster for her twin brother, and it seems as if she's on her own drama ride too.

She collapses on her bed and shuts her eyes.

She can deal with her lovely confusion in the morning.

* * *

 **I'm baaaaaack. Did you miss me? I've missed you all and IPY. Now I can finally finish the rest of this baby. I made this chapter long to make up for my absence.**

 **JESUS CHRIST FINALLY. I've waited so long to finally get to this chapter and reveal Susan's sinister intentions. It was obvious it was gonna be Susan, but I was focusing on more on the clues and see if you lovely readers could piece together yourselves what the mysterious woman was planning.**

 **It had to be Susan. The conflict began with Susan, and it's gonna be Susan that'll bring this all together. How will her plan work out? What's gonna happen with Dan and Anthony? Simon and Stephanie? Ya'll are gonna get those answers in the final few chapters.**

 **PS Dan rebranding is probably one of the best decisions he has made. Granted, we don't know what happens to the title of Phil is not on fire, but Dan's happiness is important. If he's happy, then I'm happy. I'm happy for Daniel Howell loving who he is now.**

 **˜ AA**


	32. Ultimatums and a Realization

Chapter 30: Ultimatums and a Realization

Haiku

 _It's strange when it's there_

 _The clarity of darkness_

 _And light rolled in one_

* * *

Simon is puzzled by Tabitha's aggressive expression when he comes home. It's a Friday evening in the Howell household and the home is devoid of their sons. Dan is at the Suggs for another one of the friends' weekend sleepovers. Adrian is at a friend's house a block away, so he'll be returning home before the general 10 PM curfew.

"Hi hon." What did I do? _Did I break something?_

"You liar," she seethes. She's holding a bunch of printer paper in her right hand. "You think I wouldn't know?"

"Know what?"

"Don't play dumb. How long, Simon?"

"How long what?"

"How long were you cheating on me?"

Simon's body goes stock-still, though he gives Tabitha a passive expression. "I don't… I don't know what you're talking about."

Glaring at him, she thrusts the papers onto Simon's chest. "Then explain this."

Simon takes the papers and glazes over what is printed on the sheets. His passive expression fades once he realizes his offense.

It's the four photos of him and Stephanie that Tabitha received from her mystery sender.

"You're such a hypocrite, you know that? What gives you the right to be the hurt one when you're at fault too?"

"Dear, please. Calm down. Let me explain." There's no hiding what he's doing with Stephanie from Tabitha anymore. He needs his wife to understand why he did what he did what he did, but he can't do that if her anger clouds her considerate nature.

"What do you need to explain!" She pushes on his chest. "You have your own mistress! I've been trying to give our marriage another shot, and all this time you've been screwing around with her behind my back. Is it her face you see when you come home to this house? Is she why you can even tolerate me? If you want to be with her, why did you come back?"

Remorse runs through his body. He can't blame Tabitha for her outburst. He has no clue how she found out about Stephanie, but it doesn't change the fact that she knows the truth. He did his best to protect Stephanie from the situation between the Howells and Lesters, but tonight, the wall that separated his wife and his hidden lover is ending.

"I didn't mean to," he murmurs. "She… she was there for me when I left. She was supposed to be a temporary fix… you know, so I'd stop thinking you're a bad wife. I was so scared to come back to you and the kids, but she was the one who persuaded me to come back. I wasn't sure of my feelings yet, so I listened to her and asked for your forgiveness." He gazes at her sadly. "I love you so, so much. Forgive me, dear. I… I love her too. It's my fault. I kept going back to her when I should've stayed away, yet she consoled me, let me have her how I want her, before telling me to go back home. She's so much like you for the sacrifices she's making for love."

Tabitha purses her lips once Simon is finished with his explanation. _Is this it?_ The broken pieces the couple tried to put back together is dismantling before their eyes. Does this mean their marriage is irreparable? Was the possibility of divorce finally becoming a certainty?

"Go." She directs her eyes to the floor. "I can't deal with this right now."

"Shouldn't we talk about this?"

"Not right now."

"Hon…"

"Just go!" she screams, then lowers the volume of her voice. "Please, for my sake."

"Why can't we talk now and get it over with?"

"Because-" She releases a shaky breath, "Anything you say right now, I won't be able to listen."

He nods. He can't discuss their problem to a wife that won't be able to listen to his story with an open mind. "I'll… I'll leave. I'll come back tomorrow morning."

She shakes her head. "Too soon. Come back on Monday."

"Dan and Adrian will wonder where I am."

"I'll tell them you're working on a hard case and staying at the office all weekend."

"Will they believe that?"

"They'll have to. I don't know what else I can tell them."

He walks toward the front door. His heart is already yearning to drive to the one place where he can feel upset without being judged. "I really am sorry."

"I know you are." He can feel her stare as he twists the doorknob and opens the door. _I fucked up. I really fucked up._

"Bye, Tabitha. I'll see you in a few days."

"Yeah." He takes one step outside when she speaks once more. "Say hi to Stephanie for me."

He gulps. "I will."

And just like how he left his family several months ago, the tears fall once he's inside his car.

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Simon's tear-streaked face is what greets Stephanie when he arrives at Stephanie's apartment an hour later. Since finding out about her pregnancy, she sought the right moment to tell Simon about their baby. She's scheduled for a doctor's appointment in a couple of days to learn how far along she is in her pregnancy. She hoped she could tell Simon about it by then. With Simon at her door, she could make her confession tonight.

"Can I stay here for the weekend?" Simon asks her when they're settled in her bedroom. He's wearing a spare set of pajamas that he left in Stephanie's apartment a while back in case of nights like this when he requires her place to stay overnight. His phone is charging with one of her spare chargers, and Stephanie still curious over what's causing his current mood.

"Of course. You don't need to ask. Did something happen between you and Tabitha?"

He nods solemnly. "She knows."

 _She… knows?_ "What does she know?"

"She knows about us."

Stephanie's body goes stiff. The day she dreaded to come is here, and mixed with her recent pregnancy, it's not helping her instinct to vomit. "How did she find out?"

"I don't know… she had these pictures of the two of us together. I don't know how she got them, but whatever the case, those pictures are the reason why she knows about our relationship."

"You don't think she's stalking us, do you?"

"No… I know my wife. She's not that kind of person."

She swallows the miniature heartbreak of the mention of Tabitha as his wife. It's a bittersweet reminder that he's legally married and she's only his mistress. "But we do have a stalker."

"Definitely." He grabs her hand, squeezing it firmly. "So I must ask you… what does this mean for us. Do you still want to be with me?"

"Don't be absurd, Simon. I love you. I'd be a fool to leave you."

"You love me?"

"Yes."

A grin emerges on his face. "Thank god. I love you too, Steph."

 _There. Tell him about the baby. Say it while you know he loves you._ "Will you love me if I tell you something that won't make you love me anymore?"

Concern replaces his temporary happiness. "Why do you say that?"

"I… I… I'm pregnant." She gazes at him softly, her heart in the most vulnerable state it has ever been in. "You're going to be a father."

"I am?" His gaping mouth increases her anticipation. "We're… we're gonna have a child?"

"Mmm-hmm."

"Wow." She witnesses a range of emotions flash across his face. _Is he mad? Will he take back what he said about loving me? Oh god, what have I done? I shouldn't have said anything._

"I didn't want to keep this a secret from you. I don't even know what I should do. I can abort it if that's what you want. I'm not ready to be a mother, but I also can't bring myself to kill a human life if you're willing to be a part of our baby's life."

"No abortion." He squeezes her hand. "Honestly, I'm happy for us to have a child, even if it's so unexpecting and so soon. But the whole thing with Tabitha… it's a lot for me to take in."

"I get it." Despite the stress of her pregnancy, Simon's dilemma with his family is ten times more stressful. She's grateful that she wasn't in Simon's shoes to experience the conversation he had with his wife about their relationship.

"Can we call this a night? No excuses or anything, but I'm tired."

She chuckles. Having a developing baby in her womb is making her just as tired. "Let's go to sleep. We have a full weekend ahead."

"With you and me?"

"You and me."

He lies back on her bed. "Thank you. I'll always be indebted to your kindness, Steph. All this secret-keeping should've driven you away by now."

"What can I say? I'm a fool in love."

"We're both fools in love."

 _And here we are, two fools with a baby on the way._

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Wade and Susan are sitting on the sofa of the Lesters' living room when they discuss the next phase of Susan's plan. It's 2 AM on a Sunday morning, and the twins are asleep. Whatever Tabitha has done with the photos, Susan is deliberating on when she should execute part two of her plan, which involves behaving as a "proper" mother so Johnathan could open himself more to her.

"I have to go about this carefully," she informs Wade. "If he suspects I'm being fishy, I'll have to disregard this plan and come up with a new one."

"Why not go to his apartment and bring him food?" he suggests.

"Hmmm… I like that. Then I can pretend to apologize for all our fights, how I shouldn't be too harsh on how I raise our kids, forgive him for loving that bastard… all that stuff. He'd buy that."

"Indeed."

She smiles, then rests her hand on his thigh. "I like it. And once I get rid of him, there's no stopping me from having you to myself."

A blush creeps onto his cheeks. "Y-You already have me, Susan."

"Mmmm… I love hearing you call me that." She draws her hand away. His breath hitches as she slowly moves onto his lap and straddles him.

"Madam, your children. They might hear us."

"They're asleep. We'll make this quick."

He bites his lip, but it takes him seconds to consent with her desires. _Wade… he's a good one. Much better than John._

As their mouths connect, a door opens from the twin's bedroom.

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Restlessness has been a bother for Fiona for the last couple of nights. Along with still being confused about whether or not Anthony likes her, she's having a harder time not being sarcastic toward Hannah. As much as she tries to center her snark on Katie, she can't stop Hannah from pushing her buttons. If Hannah knew that Fiona is aware of her past, Fiona would probably get more shit than she already does from her nemesis. The only thing that's keeping her from not pulling her hair out of pent-up frustration is her relief of seeing Dan gradually remembering the memories he lost from the accident.

Her trouble of falling asleep is why she's awake at 2:15 AM. She dozed off a few times during the last two hours, though she was unable to stay in dreamland. Maybe a glass of milk and checking her feeds on social media might help her out.

As she walks as quietly as she can on the hallway, she hears something from the couch that halts her footsteps. Looking over the railing, she gasps as she witnesses her mother and a stranger kissing in the living room. _WHO THE HELL IS HE? WHY IS HE MAKING OUT WITH MOM?_

"Fi?" She whips her head around and sees Phil step out of his own room, close the door behind him, and walk toward her. "You're awake too?"

"Couldn't sleep. You?"

"Same."

She nods, then tugs on his arm. "Now shush! Come and see this."

Phil rushes over to the railing with her. She points to what stunned her earlier, resulting in Phil reacting the same way as she did.

"Holy shit," he whispers.

"Holy shit indeed."

They watch in horror as Wade and Susan's moment intensifies, their hands beginning to take each other's clothes off.

"Noooooooooo." Fiona turns around so her back is facing the railing. _Is this the first time Mom and that guy is doing this at two in the morning?_

"Should we…?" Phil asks.

"I don't know! Do you want Mom to be pissed at us?"

"Do you want Mom to have sex with a guy that isn't Dad?"

"Ugh… good point. Come down with me?"

Phil tugs on her arm. "Did you think I'd let Mom yell only at you?"

 _Oh Phil. Why do you have to be so sweet now?_ "Save the sentimental shit for later."

"You sound like Dan."

"I'm Dan in female form, silly. Now let's go!"

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Susan is unbuttoning Wade's shirt when the twins reach the living room. Her own shirt is on the floor, and she's seconds away from removing her pajama bottoms. _This is my reward for all the work I put into my plans._

"Mom?"

Susan freezes. She looks over Wade's shoulder and sees Phil and Fiona staring at them.

"Mom, what are you doing?" Phil questions. He glances at Wade. "Who is he?"

"Susan." He moves her hands away, quickly buttoning back his shirt. "I should go."

She sighs, inwardly groaning. "I'll call you, okay?"

He nods. While the pair move away from each other and put their clothes back on, Susan is resisting her urge to slap the twins. They're stealing away her intimate time with Wade. It's already difficult for her to see Wade on her own time for their scheming. Ever since they slept together, she has been itching to be more intimate with him. Unfortunately, that one time was the last time they were with each other in that way. She was hoping that tonight they could do it a second time.

When the two are at the front door, he hovers his lips close to her ear and whispers soft enough so the kids won't hear him. "I thought of something else for your plan."

 _Well, at least I'm getting one good thing out of this._ "Text me?"

"I'll do it when I get home."

They part with a brief hug. He waves at her, though she only gives him a curt nod. It's her impromptu way of convincing the kids they too have an affair and aren't primarily with one another for a different reason.

The front door closes, and she flips the switch so the living room lights turn on. She crosses her arms, glaring at the twins. "Well?"

"Ummm…" Phil gazes at her nervously. "Is he a friend?"

"Of course he isn't a friend," she snaps.

"Then who is he? Your fuckboy?" Fiona accuses.

"What did you say?" Susan growls. _When did my daughter have the nerve to talk back at me?_

"Is. He. Your. Fuckboy." Fiona mirrors Susan's glare. "Because by the looks of it, you're just as guilty as Dad when it comes to cheating."

"Don't ever compare me to your father." _I'm nothing like him. He's the bad one, not me._

"Why not? Both of you are having affairs. I saw it and I heard it."

"How dare you talk to me like that! I didn't raise you to be rude to your parents!"

"You're not even being a mother!" Fiona shouts. "You've been so angry at Dad, but have you ever thought of how he felt? He's _in_ love with Mrs. Howell. He fell out of love for you, if he ever even loved you in the first place. And what about Phil and I? And Martyn? Your fights with Dad is why we don't like bringing our friends here when you and Dad are home. You have way too early curfews for us. You're disappointed if we ever bring home a C. You don't want us to grow up to be anything aside a lawyer, doctor, or something that makes a lot of money. You only love us when we study hard. No wonder Martyn killed himself. You couldn't even accept Dan and Phil being together! How's that for a worthless mother?"

"Fi, stop it," Phil says.

Susan reaches her boiling point. First her time with Wade, now her rebellious daughter. _They don't get that everything I've done is for this family._

She takes off her slipper and points it to Fiona. "You. Do you want this? Do you want me to punish you right now with this?"

Fiona flinches, though her facial expression doesn't lose its anger. "I dare you to, if you can."

"Mom, don't," Phil intercepts.

"And you." She points her slipper to Phil. "You're at fault too. You shouldn't have fallen in love with Dan. You should've let him be with Fiona!"

"You can't fight love!" Phil looks at her with watery eyes. "I forced myself not to love Dan, but this-" he splays his palm on his chest, directly over his heart, "The heart wants what it wants. No matter how many times I tell myself our love will only cause pain to those we care about, it would only hurt us more if we gave up on something we both want."

" _Love_ is why he has amnesia," Susan says.

"You can't blame love for what happened to him." A tear falls from Phil's eye. "But love is what's bringing him back. There's nothing you can say or do that'll make me give up on him again."

"Oh yeah?" Through Susan's livid mind, she's adding an unintended part of her plan. If Phil and Fiona do anything to ruin her plans, she has a consequence that'll put them in their place. "What if I kill him?"

Fiona's anger is immediately replaced with panic. "What?"

"Love is too fickle. It doesn't last." Her lips curl into a menacing smile. "Son, if you had to choose, would you choose love or Dan's life?"

Phil gasps. "What do you mean by that?"

 _Looks like Tabitha and Johnathan aren't the only people I'll have to kill._ "Choose love, and I'll kill Dan. Choose his life, you have to break up with him."

"What's the meaning of this?" Fiona looks at Susan frantically. "You're not thinking about killing Dan, are you?"

"Oh no, no, no." Susan drops her slipper, the footwear landing on the floor with an audible thud. "But if you do one wrong thing, I will."

"You wouldn't kill him," Phil says.

"Oh? I almost did." She laughs. "That accident? I'm responsible for it."

"Wh-"

"Young love. It's such a distraction." She sighs, moving her foot back into her slipper. "The car that caused your accident was driven from one of my men."

"Your men? Are they your henchmen or what?" Fiona says.

"Bingo. The accident wasn't meant to happen, nor was your boyfriend's amnesia. The amnesia was a miracle, you know, until you told him everything."

"Why do you want to break us up so badly?" Phil says in a resigned tone.

"I'm doing it for your sister. She deserves a boyfriend that can treat her right. Dan could've given her that. And Phil, I wanted you to have a _girlfriend_. What would people think of you if they found out you're gay?"

"I don't care what people think of me."

"You don't care, but I do."

"You can't choose who we love," Fiona defends. You're only making a big deal out of this because of Dad."

"SHUT UP!" Susan bellows. "Do you want me to kill Anthony too?"

Fiona's lip quivers. "What does this have to do with Anthony?"

"Silly girl. I'm not blind. That Anthony is in love with you, and you love him too."

"No I don't."

"Maybe you don't, but you care a lot about him."

"Because he's my _friend_."

"Boyfriend, friend, it's all the same. It's still love."

"I won't forgive you if you hurt Anthony."

"Ah, you're contradicting yourself, dear. Why do you want to protect him?"

"HE'S JUST MY FRIEND!" she shrieks. Her breathing starts to grow heavy. "Why does everyone want us together?"

"Denial. Isn't that the first step to love? I'm sure Phil can confirm that."

Phil rests his hands on Fiona's shoulders, a reassuring gesture that causes Susan to roll her eyes. "What do you want from us?"

"Your cooperation. Follow my directions, and nobody gets hurt."

"And if we don't?"

"Say goodbye to your father, the ones you love the most, and my worst enemy."

"Your worst enemy…?" Realization dawns onto Fiona, and her frantic expression returns. "You're gonna _murder_ Mrs. Howell? And Dad?"

"Keep it down!"

"Mom…" Phil trails off. "Don't resort to murder. Can't we talk about this properly?"

She shakes her head. She didn't expect them to understand. Her family has always viewed her as the villain. But who could blame her? It was how she was raised. She was raised to be a fierce, confident woman, one who could never taken advantage of. Even though it meant that people perceives her as narrow-minded, it isn't enough for her to let go of her ideals. If she believes in something, she sticks to it like permanent Sharpie.

"We're talking."

"Don't do this. You're making a huge mistake," Fiona pleads. "We'll tell the police."

"Didn't you hear me? If you utter a word about this, I'll go after your precious boyfriends."

"Anthony is not-"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. He isn't your boyfriend."

"What are you planning to do to Dad and Mrs. Howell?" Phil asks.

 _Finally! One of them isn't giving me a hard time._ "I'll tell you more of the details as it comes along. The important thing is that as long as this stays between us, we won't have a problem."

"You're evil," Fiona seethes. "We don't have a choice though, do we?"

 _I'm not even giving them a choice._ "That's settled then. I hope you won't be like your father and turn your back on me."

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Tucked in the safety of Phil's room, Fiona is letting out raspy breaths. Phil's arms are rubbing her arms in an attempt to soothe her following their confrontation with Susan. The twins are still in shock over Susan's threats. At this rate, they won't be having any sleep until later in the day.

"Mom… how… what the hell is she thinking!"

 _Yes, what the hell is Mom thinking? T_ heir mother is strict, but they've never seen her act like an antagonist straight out of a soap opera. Phil wishes he could tell Louise so she could use her Pentland insight. She's the one person he could think of that might know how to stop Susan's plan. However, he can't shake the terror of putting his friends in danger. He won't allow Dan to be close to death again.

"Our life really is a soap opera," Phil says.

"No shit. But it sounds more like an Asian drama than a western one."

"Psychotic mother who wants revenge? Sounds about right."

"We have to do something. We can't sit around and wait for Mom to pull the trigger."

"I agree. But you heard what Mom said. If we tell anyone, Dan and Anthony's lives are in jeopardy."

"Fuck my life!" she wails. "I don't even like Anthony that way!"

"Do you, sis?" Despite knowing how she feels about Dan, he witnessed how close her and Anthony have become. She's much more closer to Anthony than he and their friends are. They have a connection that resembles his with Dan. _She's being stubborn as always. Of course she feels something for him beyond friendship._

"No. Yes. I can't tell anymore!" She flops onto the bed, her head on one of his pillows. "What if I do like him?"

"Then… you like him. Can't fight love, remember?"

"Yeah, yeah. I remember that little speech you made to Mom. Genius, by the way."

"Thanks." He moves into a lying position too. "I do have one question."

"What is it?"

"Do you still like Dan?"

"Kind of."

"Compared to before?"

"Not so much. Why do you ask?"

"No reason."

"Are you jealous?"

"Not jealous. Just curious."

"I'll take your word for it."

Phil stares blankly at the dark ceiling. In a blink of an eye, he could potentially lose Dan if he doesn't obey Susan. Ever since he met Dan, his mother was the obstacle that prevented him and Dan from having a peaceful relationship. She was their concern when they chose to give in to their feelings, and once their relationship was out in the open, she never accepted them. Knowing that she was the culprit behind their car accident, he should've realized that they'd always remain as forbidden lovers. As long as resentment consumes Susan's heart, his dream of a normal teenage life will stay as a dream.

"I'm scared." Fiona shifts to her side and lays her head on Phil's chest. "I don't want to lose Dan and Anthony, but how can we save Dad and Mrs. Howell if we can't get help from our friends?"

"We'll figure something out." He curls his arms around her body. "We're twins. We can do anything we can put our minds to."

"There's also your Phil master plans."

"That too."

"Promise me we'll be able to save them."

"We don't need a promise for that. We _are_ going to save them."

"You swear?"

"I swear."

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

In an effort to distract herself from the impending doom of her mother's plan, Fiona agrees to join Jessica to attend Courtney's Christmas party. She hasn't gone to a party since Hannah's end of-the-year bash, and she shudders whenever she remembers how she got drunk for the first time. All she can recall is Anthony being the one to lead her back in her room. They had a conversation, though she can't pinpoint exactly what they talked about. Whatever they talked about, it must have not been too drastic since Anthony hadn't treated her any different since then.

It has been an hour since Fiona and Jessica showed up at Courtney's house. Her dread about going to another party is gone. Without Hannah and Katie around, Fiona can let down a bit of her guard regarding her caution for someone to spike her drink. Plus, with Courtney only serving non-alcoholic drinks (it was one of the deals Courtney made with her parents so she could host the party), she can guarantee walking away from the party with her virginity intact.

What's still a factor, however, is the loud music, shameless dancing, and typical make-out sessions at secluded corners of the house. Kevin brought Jessica upstairs a few minutes ago, so Fiona was left to play the latest Just Dance on Courtney's Wii in the living room with Noah and Keith. She doesn't talk to Noah and Keith often, though hanging around with them tonight makes her think of the two boys like her brothers.

"Yo!" Courtney skips into the gaming area, her fingers entwined with Shayne. Fiona giggles as she watches Noah try to dip Keith during their dance to Time of Your Life. If Noah and Olivia weren't a thing, I'd totally ship Noah and Keith.

"Hiya." Fiona wishes she has more time with Courtney outside of her party. She can see why the bubbly blonde is Jessica's best friend. While Keith and Noah are like siblings, Courtney is like Louise in terms of her being more of the listening and advice-giving type of friend. She made the comparison when she witnessed a classmate talk pointless gossip to Courtney and Courtney merely listened the entire time, then gave appropriate advice afterward. If Fiona was in Courtney's position, she would've stopped listening within the first handful of sentences.

"Can I steal you away for a bit?"

"You're gonna make her miss another dance of the gay princes?" Shayne jokes.

Fiona laughs. If Courtney is Louise, then Shayne is Alfie. Shayne seems like the jokester of their group, and she can see why Courtney and Shayne are a couple. Their personalities balance each other out.

"We'd be the best gay princes ever!" Noah responds to Shayne.

"Want me to kiss you to make that happen?" Keith asks.

"On second thought, steal me away now," Fiona says. _If they kiss, Olivia better take a pic of it._ Olivia was with Fiona and the two boys earlier, though she had left them to dance with Courtney and Shayne.

"Bring her back," Shayne says. "Don't kiss a lady without be around."

"Ooh, kinky," Fiona teases.

Shayne winks. "I'll leave you two to it."

The two girls leave the boys and head outside. Courtney leads Fiona to their backyard, where they sit on a couple of beach chairs.

"It's so great that you came," Courtney says. "Jess told me you almost didn't want to come."

"Yeah… parties aren't my thing. But I'm glad I came to yours."

"Not a party girl, huh?"

"Hmmm… I wouldn't put it that way. Just not into the alcohol, dancing, and hook-ups every weekend."

"Same here. I only go when I feel like it."

Fiona swings her legs up so she's sitting cross-legged on the chair. "So… why'd you call me out here?"

Courtney shrugs. "Thought we could have some girl talk. I love Jess and Liv to pieces, but I like talking to you too. At least you don't talk till my ears wanna fall off."

"I dunno, my friends say I've made their ears bleed."

Courtney chuckles. "If my ears bleed, I'd make you an exception."

"Well, if it helps you feel better, Phil has done that to me many times."

"Ah, your brother." Courtney angles her body to face Fiona. "How's it like having a twin?"

"It's awesome." The Lester twins are used to answering this question. Usually, they give general responses of how being twins have made them like best friends. However, with Courtney, she doesn't think the blonde teen doesn't deserve a brushed-off answer. "It's like talking to a male version of myself. He always listens to what I have to say and understand my opinions, even if he doesn't agree with them. We're similar in a lot of ways, and we also have our differences at times. But he's my brother. We have the same blood and I'd never replace him for anyone else."

"That's good. I mean, there are siblings out there that aren't very close, so I'm glad to see you and Phil not at each other's faces all the time."

Well… "True. But if you saw our dispute about him and Phil together… god, it felt like a thousand arguments in one."

"Jess told me how much you liked Dan. Was it that bad?"

"Really bad."

Courtney hums. "Well, if I were in your shoes, I'd be pissed too. If Shayne was taken away from me, I'd kill a bitch."

"Exactly! But I realized being pissed at him wasn't worth it. It's not his fault he and Dan love each other. If I came between them, I'd be the bad person."

"Is it hard to see them together?"

"Before. Now I'm happy to see them happy. Besides, Dan would be miserable if he was forced to love me."

"Nice call. It's boring to date a boy you have no feelings for. At least a little crush gives you hope it can turn to true love."

 _Darn, I should've noticed that before being mad at Dan for liking Phil instead of me._ "Shayne must've taught you a lot, huh?"

"Yup." Courtney's eyes light up at the mention of Shayne. "He's not just mind-blowing in bed, he's also the one who kinda saved me. Jess told you what happened in middle school, right?"

Fiona nods.

"A lot of people at school called me a bunch of bad names. I was so relieved once I became a freshman cause it meant there'd be people who didn't know who I was. I laid low for a while, and in sophomore year, Noah introduced me to Shayne. They were in the same biology class, they got along, and Noah invited him to eat lunch with us. Liv noticed how easy it was to be friends, so she kept trying to get us together. I denied her at first since I thought it was impossible for a cute guy who does track for our school to like me. But he did. The rest is history."

"Awww… you two are like those jock-nerd couples."

"Liv says that too!"

"You're so lucky." Louise and Zoe have Matt and Alfie. Jessica has Kevin. Hannah and Katie have a line of boys wanting to bang them. _Why am I the only one still without a boyfriend?_

"So are you. You have… what's his name again? Anthony?"

"Anthony." Fiona blushes. "We're not dating."

"You should be."

"You and the rest of my friends."

"I'm serious." Courtney grins. "I remember seeing you two at Hannah's year-end party. Liv thought you two are cute. Shayne and I made bets on when you two would get together."

 _Is it that obvious to everyone but me?_ "I thought about dating him, but… I don't know. I don't know if I love him in that way."

"Hmmm… call me a weirdo, but I see love like the five stages of grief. You'll deny it at first. You get angry that you're even thinking about liking that person. You'll bargain with God to do anything to get out of that position. You feel sort of depressed when you see that person with someone else. Then you'll accept that you actually do have feelings for that person."

"Was that what happened with you and Shayne?"

"So, so much. Keith almost used handcuffs on us so I'd be forced to tell him I like him."

 _Is that what I'm doing? Denial… anger… bargain… depression… all that's left is acceptance._ "I don't like seeing Hannah with Anthony."

"You and me both, girl."

"It's sickening. And pathetic. But it's.. I don't like the idea of seeing him with other girls who throw themselves at him."

"Really? Or are you perhaps… jealous?"

 _Am I jealous? Fion_ a hasn't really seen Anthony be close with a girl aside from her. He mentions Mari in their conversations, though Mari has a boyfriend. Pamela could have been competition, but she's interested in Ian. _If Anthony ever tells me he wants to ask a girl out that isn't me… would I be okay with that? Would I be okay with him kissing and fucking another girl?_

A pang of an unfamiliar emotion touches her chest.

She wouldn't be. Anthony is one of her closest male friends. She'd feel alone if his attention was on a single girl other than her.

 _I'm… this is how I felt about crushing on Dan. No, this is different. If this was a crush, why do I feel like it would be the end of the world if Ant ever married Hannah? Wait, that's impossible. He'd never marry Hannahconda._ However, if Anthony knew about who she was in the past, would that change his perception of her. Would he throw away his irritation and give her a chance?

 _Fuck, I'll drag her to hell if I let Hannah sink her claws on Ant._ Perfect woman or not, she won't let her rival win Mr. Padilla.

"You're in love with Anthony," Courtney declares. "Shayne owes me a hundred bucks!"

Fiona snaps out of her inner monologue. "What was the bet?"

"Shayne bet Fionthony would happen after graduation. I bet it would be before then."

"Heh… you're gonna be a hundred dollars richer."

Courtney squeals, clapping in excitement. "Cheers for Fionthony!"

Fiona grins. She finally found the love of her life. _I hope I won't die for it._

* * *

 **Oh Fiona, when you're not stubborn, you'll realize what was there for you all along. And dear lord, you have no idea how awkward it was writing that scene with Susan and Wade. But you know, gotta keep up with her changing tactics. I'm basing her behavior by a character from a current-running teleserye I'm watching atm called The Better Half. Her name is Bianca and man, she's all kinds of psycho. The wiki page for this show can vouch for me.**

 **Hint: There's a reason why Courtney was heavily involved in this chapter. She may or may not be an important chapter in a future chapter.**

 **To FALFAL, I love the Fionthony ship just as much as you do. ˆ_ˆ**

 **˜ AA**


	33. Holidays and a Reflection

Chapter 31: Holidays and a Reflection

Haiku

 _Before the wildfire_

 _Hold on to those you cherish_

 _And say "I love you"_

* * *

The days leading up to winter break, Phil isn't his upbeat, holiday self. Every time he thinks about Susan's threat, he's on the precipice of his breaking point. In a season where he should be cheery, all that's on his mind is a single word: death.

He and Fiona are consistently paranoid about Susan's men. They learned that Wade was just one of many men that Susan paid to do her malicious bidding. Because of them, Susan would know their every move. She'd know the moment they attempted to tell their friends about the situation he and his sister is in.

He's haunted by the idea of Susan sending a gunshot into Dan's head. He has vivid nightmares of the men kidnapping his friends and torturing them for knowing her plans. He and Fiona stay over at Johnathan's apartment more frequently lately so they could have some distance between themselves and their mother. Despite being with their father, Phil can't help the constant guilt in his chest when he knows that they're hiding the secret of his future murder. The only thing worst about his knowledge is the fact that until he can figure out how to outsmart Susan, he can't do anything about the situation.

He has never felt this helpless before. Even during the time that he and Dan kept their relationship a secret, he had control of keeping his mouth shut and waiting for the right time to reveal it. With this dilemma, any action he makes could be seen as a betrayal to Susan. Any hint he makes about the dilemma to his friends could be seen as grounds for her to kill Dan. He's being careful, but how much longer could be careful before it's too late for him and Fiona to intercept her plan?

He and Fiona know the basis of the plan. Susan and Johnathan are holding a birthday party on their 18th birthday, something that their parents had in mind for years. During the party, Susan would give a signal to the men for them to confront Johnathan and Tabitha, then take them to an unknown location where she'll kill them. All the twins have to do was act normally and pretend they don't know what's going on when Johnathan and Tabitha mysteriously disappear during the party. It'll be up to them to distract the guests once the adults are gone.

The twins already chose the venue for their party not too longer ago: Persephone's. They and their friends are usually there after school when they want to go out to eat instead of playing video games at one of their homes. The employees are used to their frequent presence. They're on friendly terms with Ryland, the owner of the restaurant, so when Phil and Fiona inquired him about booking the restaurant for their birthday party, he instantly said yes.

"This is one thing we can do on our own terms," Fiona commented hours later when they had talked to Ryland. "No revenge-seeking Mom to tell us where we should have fun when we're 18."

"It won't be fun once the morning news reports investigators finding two dead bodies," Phil grumbled.

The more days that passes, the less hope that Phil feels of saving Johnathan. If they can't get help from their friends and can't go to the police, what else can they do? What resources do they have between the two of them? How can they get help from other people without Susan's men finding out about it?

For the first time, Phil can't rely on his master plans for a solution.

* * *

~:~

* * *

It's 5 PM on Christmas Eve. Awaiting the twins to arrive at the Suggs' house for their annual gift exchange, the friends, including Ian and Anthony, are gathered in the living room. Zoe and Alfie are sitting together on the couch, and the rest of the friends are sitting on various places on the floor. Their wrapped presents are all under the Christmas tree. A Christmas-themed movie is playing on the TV, though they're barely paying attention to what's on the screen.

"So clearly I'm not the only one who noticed how jittery Phil and Fiona's been lately," Louise says.

PJ nods. "We all noticed."

Dan glances at the group with concerned eyes. "Who thinks it's not something good?"

"Me," Joe agrees. "It's like they think the zombie apocalypse is happening soon."

"Or something along the lines of something awful happening," Zoe seconds.

"But it's the holidays. What kind of bad thing could happen to them on Christmas or New Years?" Ian asks curiously.

Louise recalls a scene from the latest Asian drama she's keeping up with. "Anyone notice bad omens lately?"

"What counts as a bad omen?" Anthony inquires.

Louise looks at the group thoughtfully. "Just… anything that's a sign of bad luck. You know, dropping something and it breaks. A candle going out during the wedding. Feeling like someone's watching you."

"I don't think any of us have broke any plates or gone to a wedding recently," PJ answers.

Dan contemplates the possibility of Louise's last suggestion. "Are we being spied on?"

Zoe shrugs. "If we are, I didn't notice anything."

His arm draped over Zoe's shoulders, Alfie scoots closer to his girlfriend. "If anyone dares attack my lady love, they gotta get through me first."

"Says the one who complained about carrying a couch," Zoe rebuttals, remembering when the friends helped Mr. Howell move into his apartment.

From his spot on the floor, PJ uncrosses his legs and spreads them out. "Ummm… I don't know if this might help, but remember the car accident? I've been thinking… what if the person I drove to avoid meant to sabotage us?"

"You think the accident was done on purpose?" Anthony says, baffled.

"C'mon. Who actually thought that guy was drunk?"

Ian raises his hand. "Me."

"Well, I didn't." PJ's eyes darts to the ceiling. "The dude basically drove away after it happened. He caused the accident. It wouldn't be too far off if he's targeting Phil and Fiona."

"That's a good point," Zoe concurs. "I did kinda think the accident was more than it seemed. I mean, isn't it odd how it got Dan and Phil into comas and Dan to have amnesia?"

"A Dan who still has amnesia," Dan affirms. "It could all be a stroke of bad luck though."

"Maybe, or it was deliberately planned to play as a warning," PJ says.

Anthony is about to provide his input when the doorbell sounds off. He stands so he could open the door. "Let's talk about this later."

"Should we bring this up with them?" Ian questions.

"I don't think so," PJ disagrees. "It's better we keep our mouths shut so we don't ruin Christmas for them."

The friends voice their agreement.

Anthony opens the front door, and the twins enter the household holding plastic bags filled with wrapped presents.

"Hi guys." Fiona scans the friends, noticing a strange lull in the atmosphere. Did they talk about something before she and Phil came over? "Did… did I miss something?"

"Nada." Alfie relaxes on the couch, a positive expression on his face to cover up his own worry. "Movie's almost done."

Phil looks at the screen. "Oh, Home Alone 2! Can you restart it? You know how much I love this movie."

Relieved that Phil is oblivious to what they discussed, Ian eagerly reaches for the remote on the floor. "On it."

As the twins go to the Christmas tree to lay out their presents, Fiona remains suspicious of their friends' behavior.

She's starting to have one more thing to worry about.

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Two days after Christmas, Tabitha knocks on the door to Johnathan's apartment. Since finding out about Stephanie, she and Simon have been talking to each other less. When the boys are around, they communicate with each other enough so their sons won't be suspicious. Otherwise, the tension is too much for them to have personal conversations with each other. How she and Simon managed to act coupley with each other in front of Dan and Adrian on Christmas day still amazes her.

She spends most of her spare time with Johnathan. While Simon is usually with Stephanie, she spends nights at Johnathan's place so she doesn't have to sleep next to Simon all the time. Her frequent presence in his home has resulted in Johnathan offering her an opportunity to live with him. If she wasn't constantly thinking about her sons' future, she would've instantly made the decision to pack up and take up the guest bedroom permanently. That, and her family would gossip for days if they learned she's living with a man that isn't her husband, a man she had sex and an affair with, and feelings that exists today.

The door swings open. Johnathan clad only in his boxers with a toothbrush in his mouth. After all this time, the sight of Johnathan without most or all of his clothes still stirs butterflies in her stomach.

Johnathan heads back to the bathroom as Tabitha leaves her purse on the coffee table. She settles herself on the couch, lying down on the arm and watching what's currently playing on the TV. Johnathan walks out of the bathroom a few minutes later, fully dressed. She's relieved he has all his clothes on, though she's internally pouting. She wished she saw shirtless-Johnathan for a few more seconds.

"Are you staying over tonight?"

"Uh-huh." Tonight, Simon informed her about having something important to attend to with Stephanie. Whether or not what he has to do is important, she didn't pry for details. She stopped caring about his personal activities when he confirmed his relationship with Stephanie.

"What do you want to do?"

"Ummm… how about some Netflix?"

He grabs the remote and squeezes himself on the couch. "Movie? Or TV series?"

"Whatever you want."

He flips through the comedy category. Tabitha is pleased by his choice. She's in the mood to watch something light and have a good laugh following the things that have been happening to her lately.

He plays Trevor Noah's recent stand-up special when Tabitha speaks. "Are you happy?"

"What?"

"Are you satisfied with your life?" The question has been in Tabitha's mind lately. Ever since she met Johnathan, a chain of events occurred that drastically shifted her peaceful life. She fell in love with a man who showed her that love is better beautiful than content, she made an enemy with her lover's wife, her eldest son fell into a coma and woke with amnesia, and her husband, whom she thought was the most loyal man she ever knew, was secretly seeing another woman. It's mind-boggling to think that _she_ is a person capable of experiencing all of these things. She didn't peg her life to resemble something out of pop culture, but after the move, her life has indeed become a real-life drama.

"I'm satisfied right now."

She moves into a sitting position so Johnathan could have more room to be fully comfortable on the couch. "Even though I've caused nothing but trouble?"

"It's the kind of trouble I don't mind."

 _How could he say that when he could've been better off not meeting me?_ "So if we were still together, you'd stay with me no matter how much hell Susan causes?"

He turns his head to look at her. "Are you feeling sentimental?"

She closes her eyes. "Sort of. It is almost a new year and I've been reflecting on what happened this year."

"I've been doing the same." He gazes at her softly. "I didn't expect things to happen as they did, but with where things are now, it isn't too bad. I like living on my own. I regret not being a better father to Martyn, but his death made be want to have a better relationship with Phil and Fiona. I… had you. We may not be together anymore, but having you as a friend is enough."

She smiles, her eyelids fluttering open. "I love having you as a friend too."

"I wish we can still be more."

"Yeah…"

He places his hand on her thigh. "Can we?"

"We can't. Didn't we swear to be better spouses to who we're married to?"

"That was before they wronged us."

She bites her lip. _Why does he have to be right?_ "It doesn't mean we should leave their side."

"We shouldn't let their actions hold us back." His other hand touches the side of her face, his thumb brushing the corner of her lips. "Tabitha, I love you. You're the only one who'll ever be in my heart. It's hard to only be friends with you. I always think about our relationship and… I want that back. I want to be with you for the rest of my life, even if it's in secret."

"John-"

He cuts her off when his body leans closer to her. "My kids wants us together. Your kids accepted what we had. We're happy with each other, so why should we let others dictate our happiness?"

 _Because they're the ones who can ruin a happiness that can't last._

"We've hurt enough people-"

"I don't care anymore." His finger twirls a lock of her hair. "We hurt ourselves to stop hurting those we care about. Look what happened. When we ended what we had, things got bad for our children."

 _Again, he's right._

"If our sons can fight against the bad things that happen to them, we can do the same."

She stifles a counter argument. She's stumped by his last reason. When Dan had told her how Phil kept their relationship a secret hours after the boys' afternoon at the cabin, she was awed by how Phil made a similar sacrifice as she did. When she ended the affair so Johnathan could keep his family together, Phil tried to push Fiona and Dan together due to her lingering feelings for him. Phil endured the same pain in his heart as he lived painstakingly aching days without the reciprocating feelings of his lover. Despite her and Johnathan's love going over the boundaries of legal marriage, the idea of putting the happiness of others before your own is the same.

"I know you love me, Tabitha," he whispers. "Please give us another chance."

She puts down her emotional shield.

How can she continue fighting against what the both of them clearly desire?

"Love me," she murmurs. "Love me tonight and every day after tomorrow."

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

On the day before New Years Eve, Dan and Phil spend a day alone with each other at their cabin. Phil let Susan know about the date, and she allowed him to go out for it. He believed it meant they would be spied by Wade or one of her other minions, though during their trek through the forest, he didn't spot any of them. Perhaps she trusted him enough to be alone with Dan and not say anything about her plan. Then again, he's too fearful to the point that he wouldn't have done so anyway.

Fairy lights (a Christmas gift to Phil from Louise and Zoe) hang on the cabin walls, casting a warm glow. Two backpacks and two black 3DS consoles are left alone on the wooden floor with their respective copies of Pokemon Sun and Moon: Phil with Sun and Dan with Moon (as they had vowed to purchase before the accident occurred). A black and white checkered blanket is laid out on the floor, and the boys are cuddling together with their heads resting on a couple of pillows from Dan's bed.

"Two more days until a new year begins," Phil says. He leaves a brief kiss on Dan's temple. "Do you have a new years resolution?"

"Not really." It's a lie. Dan has one goal in mind, though bringing it up with Phil now could be too soon and too much for his precious brain to handle.

"Not one?"

"Who needs a resolution when I have you?"

Phil laughs, his mouth moving to Dan's neck and sucking on the familiar spot that elicits a groan from the brunette.

"Stop!" Dan tickles Phil's hip, though Phil's lip stays attached to his neck. "Philly, not fair."

"You're so cheesy," Phil snickers.

"I have to be so you don't know what I want to accomplish next year."

"Ah! So you do have a resolution!"

"Goals, not a single thing I'm nearly sure won't come true in the upcoming 364 days."

"What kind of goals do you have?"

"The generic ones. Graduate high school with honors. The two of us not breaking up. Finding Joe a girlfriend."

"I dunno, Joe being single isn't necessary for him to be ready to mingle," Phil jokes.

Dan chuckles. "It is if he's gonna go the last two years of high school without us."

Phil shakes his head in amusement. "He'll be fine. We're all gonna spend time with him as often as we can." He settles his head on the crook of Dan's neck. "You don't have a solid resolution you can do throughout the next year?"

"Nope."

"Hmmm…" Phil lifts his head. His blue irises gaze at Dan with an expression Dan can only describe as lust. "What if I tell you-" His arms hold Dan tighter, "That I have a resolution?"

"W-Which is?" Dan stammers. _Holy shit, is he thinking what I've been thinking too?_

Phil hums. "Guess what I bought with my last paycheck?"

"A video game?"

"Try again."

"Food?"

"No."

"Stuff for New Years Eve?"

"Hmmm… you're not far off."

Dan looks at Phil with a confused expression. "What is it?"

"Condoms."

Dan squeaks. _Phil! How naughty is he when he's not with me?_

"They're in my bag." Phil smiles, though a hint of concern is mixed with the lust in his eyes. "That's if you're ready. We've been together for quite a while and you like me again and… well, I thought you'd want this as much as I do."

 _I do, I do, I do._ "You thought right."

Phil's face lights up. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." Dan grins, his hand clutching the back of Phil's shirt. "So you want to try now?"

Phil nods eagerly. "We're alone and we don't have to hike back for another two hours."

"You had this plan, huh? You sneaky little shit."

Phil laughs. "I'm your sneaky little shit."

"Were you referring to sex as explosive like fireworks?"

"Bingo."

Dan joins in Phil's laughter. "I should've known! And I thought I'm dirty-minded."

"Hey! Just because I'm an angel doesn't mean I don't have a dark side."

"Whatever! Get the condoms, you dork."

"Yes _sir_."

"Did you just show me your kinky side?"

"Maybe…"

Dan swats Phil's shoulder lightly. "Condoms, Phil. I'm gonna show you how much of a sir I can be."

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

A small box of three condoms is pulled out from Phil's backpack. The boys share a teasing look between each other before their hands are all over each other. Clothes are removed. Hands and mouths explore places they've never touched the other before. Dan hovers over Phil, his mouth ghosting over Phil's ear.

"Are you sure?"

"I've never been sure of anything else in my life."

"Liar."

" _Dan_."

"Alright, fine."

Their first time like this brings a shower of bliss that Phil feels he waited too long to experience. Dan's hands and mouths working alongside his hips allows Phil to drown in those waves of pleasure he reads in fanfiction. It's everything he could hope for, and when it's over, he wishes they have more time to do it a second time.

"I love you," Dan mumbles, his naked body flushed against Phil.

Tears well in Phil's eyes. Finally, Dan has said the words he waited seemingly endless weeks to hear again.

"I know."

This is a day Phil will remember forever.

It's the best memory he'll have of Dan when he'll hate him if he can't save Tabitha.

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

As the boys are in each other's arms, at the Lester residence, Susan stares at the photos of Dan and Anthony on her whiteboard of diabolical plans.

She draws an X on the photos with her red marker.

She may have promised to leave them alone if Phil and Fiona abide to her plot, but she still has something huge planned on the boys.

* * *

 **Man, if the rating for this was M, I could've explicitly detailed Dan & Phil's sexy time. I do love smut, after all. If you want, I could always post it as a separate outtake. It's all up to you guys if you'd wanna read that.**

 **Who has an idea on how Phil & Fiona will stop Susan? They do have something up their sleeve. It'll be a plan that may or may not go well.**

 **˜AA**


	34. Hostages and a Birthday

Chapter 32: Hostages and a Birthday

Haiku

 _On a special day_

 _Transitions to adulthood_

 _Is memorable_

* * *

A month passes. A new year is welcomed, and changes that were made before New Years Eve are carried out flawlessly into January. Tabitha and Johnathan resumed their relationship (they've chosen to keep their status hidden for the time being). Stephanie's is progressing well with her pregnancy, choosing to keep her baby instead of resorting to abortion. Simon is searching through numerous sites for baby names so he can find the perfect name for his third child. Sex as a factor in Dan and Phil's relationship has made them a target of jokes with their friends. Fiona is coming more to terms with her feelings for Anthony as she deliberates when she can confess to him properly.

With the twins' 18th birthday drawing closer, Phil and Fiona have found the best solution they possibly could for Susan's plan. It's not a guarantee that it'll keep Johnathan and Tabitha safe from injury, but it's better than going directly to the police. The only drawback is having to be sure that their phones are with them all the time. Their plan will backfire if Susan or her men takes it from them.

Phil and Fiona have high hopes for their plan to work. They're involving people who Susan and her men don't know. They're putting so much of their trust of them, because if they can't deliver on their part, the lives of their loved ones are more at risk.

If their plan doesn't work, they could be the ones that end up dead.

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

The Friday before the twins' 18th birthday party (a couple of days before the twins' actual birthday), Zoe and Alfie are on a dinner date at Persephone's. Alfie received his paycheck from Lily's last weekend, and he decided to save the major portion of the money to treat Zoe for their date. They don't often go to non-fast food chain restaurants for dates, and whenever the friends go to Persephone's after school, they do so only to buy something light on the dessert or appetizer menu. Never main meals, which Alfie anticipated doing for Zoe tonight.

"This is a reason why you're a nitwit," Zoe comments as she and Alfie look through the menu.

"I'm a nitwit with a plus one," Alfie answers lovingly, peeking over the top of the menu to stare lovingly at Zoe.

"You're not gonna budge, will you?"

"Not a chance."

"I can really order what I want and you'll pay for it?"

"Anything my lady love desires." Even if their bill is over the amount he saved from his paycheck, he has enough money on his credit card to cover any additional cost.

She puts down her menu, her lips curling into a smile to reflect the love in his eyes. _God, I'll be kissing those lips so much once we're done eating._ "I won't order too much, all right? Don't want you broke."

"That's fine with me."

"You'll need some money to treat me again."

He chuckles. "Didn't expect anything less."

As they look back to their menus, four men enter the restaurant and sit on the table directly behind Alfie. To the average person, they look like a typical group of adult friends eating out. However, amongst the men is Bruce, who is oblivious to how close they are sitting to two of the Lester twins' closest friends.

"Sir, are you ready for tomorrow?" a man with spiked blonde hair questions.

Bruce, a man with cropped brown hair, nods. "Madam has taken care of everything. All we have to do is follow her."

"She's crazy, but my kind of crazy," a man with curly auburn hair muses. "If Wade wasn't banging her, I would've made my move the first day I worked for her."

"Right?" A bald man agrees. "But Tabby… man, oh man, Suzy's hot, but Tabby is smoking."

Alfie's body tenses. Sitting very close to the four men, he can hear every word coming out of their mouths. There's something about their conversation that's making him uncomfortable. "Lady love?"

"Hm?"

"Shhh… make sure they don't hear."

She lowers the volume of her voice. "You mean the dudes behind us?"

He nods.

"I noticed too."

Just as Alfie is about to respond, a waitress stops by their table and asks if they're ready to order.

Alfie clears his throat. "Yeah. I'll have the garlic chicken pasta with Alfredo sauce, a side of fries, and a medium Pepsi."

The waitress writes down his order and turns to Zoe. "And you?"

"The meaty hamburger meal, but replace the drink with a vanilla milkshake," Zoe replies.

She writes down Zoe's order, tells them she'll deliver their order shortly, and walks away. As soon as the waitress is out of earshot, Alfie hears a part of the men's conversation that alarms him. He and Zoe take out their phones and nonchalantly look their social media while their ears are alert of the four men.

 _ **"Just to be sure, we're approaching Daniel after midnight, right?"**_

 _ **"That's why we're here, doof. We need to eat up so we can carry him."**_

 _ **"They're teenagers, not bags of potatoes."**_

 _ **"They're still heavy."**_

 _ **"Wade already got Anthony earlier. He didn't put up too much of a fight. If the others were able to get Anthony, we'll get to Daniel easy too. So quit your whining. You signed that contract to do whatever madam wants. If madam wants you to carry heavy shit, you'll carry heavy shit."**_

 _ **"Ugh. Least all I gotta do is stay by the van."**_

 _ **"Yeah, cause you're a newbie, and newbies can be stupid enough to piss off madam."**_

 _ **"I ain't stupid."**_

 _ **"We're already stupid just for saying yes to Wade. So quit yapping and let's do our job, okay?"**_

 _ **"Did madam text you the location?"**_

 _ **"Yeah, but she told me not to tell you guys the address till the four of us get there. She'll tell the others tomorrow."**_

 _ **"Why not tell us now?"**_

 _ **"Madam's rule. The only other person who knows right now is Wade."**_

 _ **"Use your brain, dipshit. We're in public."**_

 _ **"Is it somewhere I know at least?"**_

 _ **"I dunno. Just think of a place where you can keep someone hostage. That's where we're taking those boys."**_

 _ **"Like that old building on Smith?"**_

 _ **"Jesus Christ, Gary, maybe you're not so stupid after all."**_

 _ **"I'm right?"**_

 _ **"Dead on."**_

 _ **"Wow! So all those videos I watched about haunted places paid off."**_

 _ **"For that, I'll pay for your beer."**_

"L-Love?" Alfie squeaks.

Zoe looks at him with panicked eyes. "Facebook Messenger. Now."

Alfie switches to the FB Messenger app on his phone and quickly sends a message to Zoe. **_Please tell I'm not delusional_**

Zoe messages him back just as quick. _**Dan & Ant are in trouble**_

 ** _A: Then we're on the same page_**

 ** _Z: Who are these dudes? Is Mrs. Lester their leader? What's going on with Mrs. Howell? Why do they want Dan & Ant?_**

 ** _A: idk what do?_**

 ** _Z: The bald one said they got Ant. We have to warn Dan._**

 ** _A: Do we call him?_**

 ** _Z: I'll text him. You call Anthony & see if he picks up._**

 ** _A: Now?_**

 ** _Z: Let's eat first_**

 ** _A: But they're in trouble!_**

 ** _Z: We'll be the ones in trouble if we do it where they can see us!_**

"Let's just eat quick," Zoe murmurs. She sends another message to Alfie. _**Patience is a virtue remember?**_

He gives her a curt nod. **_When you're right, you're right_**

The waitress delivers their tray of orders three minutes later, and the pair instantly start eating. They pace themselves with eating their meal, having mundane exchanges at the same time so the four men wouldn't get suspect them of eavesdropping on their conversation. They catch a few more crucial bits from the men's conversation, though it isn't as shocking as the bits they heard earlier.

 ** _"Make sure they don't escape."_**

 ** _"Don't take their phones or else they'll never shut up."_**

 ** _"Their parents won't suspect a thing."_**

 ** _"The important thing is until we get proper instructions from madam, we can't kill them."_**

A little over a half hour later, Zoe and Alfie finish their food. Alfie pays for the bill, and he compromises with letting Zoe leave a tip for the waitress. The minute they step out the restaurant, they each take out their phones. They wait until they're a block away from Persephone's to dial Dan and Anthony's numbers.

"Pick up, pick up, pick up," Alfie mumbles.

Zoe gets Anthony's voicemail and tries to call him again.

Alfie is successful with his call.

"Hey Alfs. What's up?"

* * *

~:~

* * *

Dan is in the middle of a texting conversation with Phil when Alfie's number suddenly appears on his phone screen. He wonders why Alfie would call during his date with Zoe. Alfie typically doesn't call or text the friends whenever he's alone with Zoe; it's his and Zoe's "love hour," as Dan would cheekily put it. Similar to how Dan and Phil are during dates, Zoe and Alfie are in their private bubble when they have their alone time.

 _Maybe there's something new on the menu._ "Hey Alfs, what's up?"

"Dan!" Dan is startled by how alarmed Alfie sounds. _Oh no, what happened to Zoe?_ Alfie wouldn't sound like this unless something terrible happened to Zoe.

"What's wrong?"

"Are you okay?"

"Ummm… yeah. I'm just at home texting Phil."

Alfie sighs in relief. "Good, we have time. Listen to me, lock all your windows and doors. Even the one for your bedroom. Do you have a security camera or something to record everything in your room?"

"No…" _What the fuck?_ "Is someone gonna rob my house?"

"Sorta… Hold on, I'll put you on speaker so Zoe can hear you. She'll explain it better than me."

There's a few seconds of non-conversation before it's resumed.

"Dan? You still there?"

"Zoe, what's Alfie talking about."

She sighs. "Dan, this is gonna sound crazy, so stick with me. While we were at Persephone's, we heard these four guys talking and we think they're planning something against you and Anthony. They already got to Anthony, and they're coming for you next after midnight. We're not sure of the details, but Alfs and I wanna make sure you're safe tonight."

"O…kay."

"I'm sure you're in danger," Alfie says. "Zoe tried calling Anthony numerous times, but he didn't pick up."

"Maybe he's busy."

"Or those guys really did kidnap Anthony," Zoe counters. "It's up to you to believe us. But please, please, be careful."

"I will."

"You don't sound convinced."

"It's not that. I just don't want to overreact and wake up tomorrow with everything totally fine."

Alfie laughs bitterly. "With all the things happening to you, nothing's fine."

 _Mom cheated, I have amnesia, my boyfriend lied… what does fine even mean?_ "Guys, don't freak out too much. I'll barricade the windows and all that."

"Please do," Zoe pleads.

And that's what Dan does once he finishes speaking to Zoe and Alfie. He obeys their warning, shutting the windows as best as he can and ensuring all doors, especially his bedroom and front and back doors, are locked tightly. He even drinks a bottle of Starbucks mocha frappe that he bought while grocery shopping with Tabitha last weekend. The sugar and slight caffeine keeps him awake once midnight hits, and he lies in bed on his phone while being aware of his surroundings.

But the warning wasn't enough to prevent the kidnapping.

At 1:13 AM, his windows burst open. Despite concealing himself under the bed, the men manage to find him, drug him unconscious, and carry him away to their vehicle. As they drive away from the Howell residence, from the van's backseat, Bruce sends a text to Susan.

 _ **We've got Dan**_

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

In a guarded room of a run-down, abandoned building, Anthony is sitting on the floor, staring at the walls with a blank expression. He's given up for the time being on fleeing; the two men watching the door are too strong and he can't fight them alone. He doesn't have enough hours spent at the gym to take down two guys with bodies built like football players.

He briefly checks the time on his phone. 2:05 PM. His phone's charge is at 83%, though he wants to conserve as much of the phone's battery in case he's being held hostage for a long while.

His entire body is tired, but his mind can't be lulled to sleep. He's trying to be awake until the last possible second. If he falls asleep, he could lose a potential opportunity to run away from the guards.

Whoever and whatever reason for his kidnapper's motives, he doesn't want to stay here. Based by his surroundings, the likelihood of the building being haunted is close to certain. If the place is haunted, what if the ghosts are angry? The thought of dealing with an angry spirit puts more dread in his anxious heart.

 _What does he want from me? Or she if it's a girl? I haven't done anything bad. I'm not a thief. My parents aren't part of the mafia. Are they? What if they are? Am I being held for ransom? No, that can't be it. I'd feel it if my family are that evil._

 ** _"Hey! Let me go! Let me talk to your leader. I haven't done anything, I swear!"_**

 ** _"Shut up, or do I have to silence you?"_**

 ** _"If you wanted to kill me, why haven't you already done it?"_**

 ** _"If we did, we'd be the ones getting killed. Madam's orders."_**

 ** _"Who's this madam? What did I do to her?"_**

 ** _"Does it look like we're this dumb to answer those questions? Just shut up already. Talking won't help you."_**

 _Is that… Dan?_ The sarcastic tongue sounds so much like Dan, and his inference is confirmed when the door bursts open and Dan is pushed inside. Similar to what Anthony did when he attempted to run out the door before it closed, Dan tries to slide through the open space. Anthony watches in hopelessness as Dan is shoved to the side and the two men slam the door shut and lock it once again. If Anthony wasn't too tired, he would've used the tiny opportunity to sneak away from the men as they were dealing with Dan.

"FUCK YOU!" Dan screams. "I hate you! I hope you rot in hell!"

"Dan, stop." Anthony crawls to Dan and reaches out for his hand. "They're not gonna let us go."

"Anthony…" Dan kneels down to Anthony's level. "You're here too."

Anthony nods. "They drugged you too, huh?"

"Yup. Woke up once I got here."

"We should hit the gym."

"You think?"

The boys move so they're sitting down while leaning their backs against the wall across the front door. With tired eyes, Anthony notes Dan's slumped shoulders and assumes the brunette is just as exhausted as he is.

"Dan, get some sleep," Anthony tells Dan.

"What about you?"

"I'll be on lookout."

"You look just as tired."

"I know, but one of us has to be awake to check if those dudes leave."

"I doubt they'd do that."

"You never know."

Dan shifts his position again so he's lying on his side on the concrete floor. "Wake me up when you can't stay up any longer."

"Promise," Anthony agrees.

"Then g'night. May those dudes meet the devil."

"You're awfully cranky."

"We got kidnapped and we're trapped in a place for ghosts. I'm more than cranky."

"Good point."

Dan's eyelids close, and Anthony pats Dan's leg reassuringly. Whether or not they'll escape this place alive, at least he's with someone that'll make his possible death less lonely.

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Fiona wakes up the morning of the party with an uncomfortable feeling in her stomach, the kind of feeling when she senses something is off. With the events that'll unravel later in the day, she can feel her anxiety levels protruding throughout her body at the thought of something terrible already happening.

It's her birthday. She shouldn't have to be paranoid on the day that she's officially an adult.

It's when she looks at her phone that her worry increases. It's a text from Anthony, sent to her around 6 AM, three hours before she woke up.

 ** _Don't have much time. Dan & I are in trouble. Please help us._**

"No," she whispers. Did Mom get to them. She rapidly dials Anthony's number, crossing her fingers that he's okay.

Several seconds pass, and Fiona braces herself to hear Anthony's voicemail. She's surprised and relieved when the line from the other end is picked up.

"Fiona."

"Dan? Where's Ant?"

"He's asleep." His voice is hushed, and she questions if one of Susan's men is involved. "We got kidnapped."

 _Mom already got to them?_ "Did you see who got you?"

"Yeah. I got a good look at their faces. Anthony and I are being watched."

"Do they know you're calling me?"

"Nope. We're in a locked room and they're on the other side of the door."

"Where are you two?"

"I don't know. I was put to sleep and when I woke up, I was in this room."

"Did you get the names of the people who's watching you?"

"Only the two looking after me and Ant. Gary and Drew."

She vaguely recalls the two names as part of Susan's men. There's no way that random strangers kidnapped Dan and Anthony. She's definitely sure this has to be the work of her mother.

"Dan, how much battery is in Anthony's phone?"

"Thirty-seven percent."

"Hang up. Don't burn up all the battery. I think I might know why this is happening, but you have to trust me."

"Wait, what do you mean you know? Do you know who's behind this?"

"It's too much to explain now. I promise I'll tell you everything later. For now, stay there."

Dan sighs. "It's you and Phil's birthday. I can't miss your party."

 _I'd rather you miss my party than seeing your dead bodies._ "You'll make it, so don't do anything too reckless. Phil and I will go find you."

"What about your party?"

"You and Ant are my priority."

"Fi-"

She hangs up before Dan could ask any more questions.

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

It's two hours before the party. At the Howell residence, Tabitha and Adrian are getting dressed for the event. Tabitha had woken up that morning with a Post-It note on the fridge from Dan that said he left early to help the Lesters make final preparations for the party. He even called her not too long ago to assure her that he's okay, he has the clothes he'll change to for tonight, and that he'll see her and Adrian later. She's slightly concerned about his sudden departure without telling her the previous night, though she told herself that it must be her motherly paranoia that's causing her to be more jittery than she has to.

Her son called her. If he hadn't, then she would've been hyperventilating over his safety.

 _Dan will be at the party._ She plays the mantra over and over in her head to ease her worried thoughts. _He's with Phil and Fiona. They won't do anything to him. Their devil of a mother would, but her children aren't like her. They won't let Dan be in harm's way._

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Phil is enraged when Fiona informs him about Dan and Anthony's situation. The two are at Persephone's, awaiting their guests to arrive. He can't believe that Susan didn't keep her word about not hurting his boyfriend. That was their condition, and if she does as much as lay a hand on them, he won't hesitate to turn her into the police.

"Why didn't you tell me earlier?" A bead of sweat drops from his forehead. "Our plan didn't include having to rescue my boyfriend and your soon-to-be boyfriend."

"Anthony's not my-"

"Not the point," he cuts her off, unwilling to hear her usual protests over anything involving her feelings for Anthony. "I anticipated having to save two lives tonight, not four."

"I know, but what else could I do?" Fiona counters, leaping up to sit on a stool. "We had our party to finish preparing. Mom didn't leave us alone all morning. Now that she isn't here yet, this is the only time I have to tell you before everyone gets here."

"Why didn't you just text me?"

"Did you expect me to send you a long-ass text?"

Phil rubs his temple, moving to sit on a stool too. "Sorry. I'm so stressed out about all this and I don't want to snap at you on our birthday."

"Don't sweat it, bro. I've been trying to think of a solution, but I realized we can't go rescue them on our own without Mom tracking us down. I think we'll have to wait till our plan begins to do something."

Phil nods. "I was thinking the same thing." He glances at the clock above the door leading to the restaurant's kitchen. "If we do this right, we can get Dad and Mrs. Howell out of here and they can help us look for the guys."

"Sound good," she agrees. "Having two adults on our side should definitely up our odds."

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

On his way to Persephone's, Ian is anxious about Anthony's whereabouts. He hasn't heard from his best friend all morning, and the Padilla's had told him that they thought Anthony was with Ian since Anthony hadn't returned home last night. At first, Ian assumed that Anthony could have spent the night at the Lesters. With Anthony being head over heels for the female Lester, he wouldn't be surprised if that scenario was actually true.

However, hours have passed since then. If Ian doesn't see Anthony's face at the twins' parties, he's going to call authorities to report a missing person.

Ian is parking his car at Persephone's parking lot when he hears his phone ringing. Alfie's number is on the screen, so he answers the call.

"Hey, Alfie."

"Hi, Ian. Have you heard from Dan within the last… say, 12 hours?"

"No…" _Has Dan gone missing too?_ "I should ask you the same question. Have you seen Anthony? I haven't seen him since yesterday afternoon."

"Nope."

"You don't think…?" _Is Anthony with Dan? Where did Dan take my best friend?_

"Ian, this is gonna sound crazy, but I have a hunch Dan and Anthony have been kidnapped."

A wave of shock runs through Ian's body. "What?"

"Zoe and I were on a date last night. Long story short, we heard some super suspicious things from these guys and we're almost sure they're gonna do something to Dan and Anthony."

"Then let's go find them!" Ian reacts. "What if they're dead by now?"

"We will… after Phil and Fiona's party. We can't stand them up."

"Are you fucking serious? This is our friends' lives on the line!"

"I know! But this is important to them. They only turn 18 once."

"Alfie…" Ian whines.

"We'll leave early. Besides, PJ's driving to Persephone's too, so we'll have an extra car in case something goes wrong."

 _What goes right when someone is ever kidnapped?_ "Fine. If you won't go now, I'll do it myself."

Not listening to Alfie's protests, Ian ends the call. He leans against the car seat and dials Anthony's number.

Surely, Anthony and Dan's kidnappers will have to answer Anthony's phone at some point, right?

* * *

˜:˜

* * *

Guests begin to arrive in Persephone's. Phil and Fiona mingle with their friends, as well as greet their relatives and their friends who showed up. With Dan and Anthony still missing, the twins used a far-fetched excuse of the two boys picking up their cake and will be back sometime after the food is served. It's the one excuse they improvised that has a shot of fooling their friends temporarily.

The twins confronted Susan about Dan and Anthony's whereabouts minutes before their friends show up. As they suspected, Susan confirm to the twins that she indeed imprisoned the boys, even giving them a vague clue of their whereabouts: a place where no one would dare enter. Phil deduces that the boys could either be hidden in the run-down building on Smith Avenue where he heard stories of gangs using as a hangout, or an abandoned warehouse not too far from their school rumored to be haunted.

"If you do anything to disobey me tonight, all it takes is a phone call to shoot their brains out," she threatens.

Fiona has to cross her fingers behind her back to control her anger, but she's able to plaster a fake smile and respond with a "Yes, mother."

Out of all the friends that the twins invited, minus Dan and Anthony, Ian is still yet to arrive, though Alfie told them that Ian might arrive a little late since he has to pick up their birthday gifts. Regardless of the upcoming dread, Fiona is thrilled that Ian gave a lot of thought on her and Phil's gift. Perhaps their gifts are from Ian and Anthony combined, and due to Anthony's forced absence, Ian was left to transport their gifts by himself.

It's 7:30 PM when the food is finally served. Susan, at the makeshift stage at the front of the restaurant, informs everyone that friends and family will share their own speeches dedicated to the birthday twins, similar to how it's done during weddings from friends/families to the bride and groom.

Fiona feels a lump forming in her throat. Thirty more minutes. Her friends will make speeches first, followed by Tabitha, then Susan and Johnathan. Susan's plot entails for her men to take Tabitha and Johnathan while they're "backstage," waiting for their turn to do their speeches (backstage is a room behind the makeshift stage used for these kinds of moments whenever there's a special event).

Fiona locks eyes with Susan as she walks down the stage in her three inch silver heels. Susan gives Fiona an affirmative nod.

This is it. If Phil and Fiona time their plan right, Tabitha and Johnathan won't even get a chance to step on the stage.

Fiona distracts herself with eating to keep her anxiety at bay. Since she and Phil got to pick the food served on the Persephone's party menu, the food is expectedly matching her standards. She chows down on beef broccoli, rice, and crispy chicken (she and Phil went for the Asian cuisine), holding back groans at how delicious the food is.

"Damn girl, you must love your meat," Courtney teases, twirling chow mein with her fork.

Normally, Fiona would choke at the innuendo, but she's determined to have her attention on the food and her friends' banter instead of the time when the speeches start.

"She loves her meat more than me," Joe teases in return.

"I've got more meat," PJ remarks, lightly pounding his chest with his chest.

"If you did, Christy would've been all over it by now," Louise giggles.

PJ playfully scowls. "I'm working on it!"

"Yeah, yeah. You two got your first date in two weeks."

 _Christy and PJ? SINCE WHEN? What the fuck did I miss out on?_ "When did you finally grow them balls, Peej?"

"Yesterday," PJ says sheepishly. "The girls took care of everything."

"Yeah, we did." Zoe takes a bite of orange chicken. "If you and Phil weren't busy planning your party, we would've asked you to help us out."

"What did you do?"

"They just went to Christy and told her there's someone who wants to be her Valentine," PJ grumbles. "You didn't have to do that. I was gonna ask her to be my Valentine anyway."

"No you weren't," Joe scoffs. "You would've chickened out and then we would've had to explained yourself _again_."

"Right? If it weren't for Zoe, Jessica, and I, Christy wouldn't know to expect a Valentine and a date," Louise finishes explaining.

Fiona pouts. "Awww… I wanted to play matchmaker with you."

Jessica hugs Fiona's shoulders. "You will. We've got more up our sleeves for those dorks on Valentine's Day."

"And speaking of Valentine's Day…" PJ darts his eyes to the two empty chairs around the circular table. "When will Dan, Ian, and Anthony get here?"

Phil shrugs. "I don't know about Ian, but I'm certain Dan and Anthony will come."

Fiona notices a strange expression glaze over Alfie's eyes when Phil said Ian's name. If Alfie knows what Ian's gift is, he should've mentioned an estimated time for Ian's arrival. For the time being, she chooses not to verbally question it. Ian's absence is of less importance than the four lives on the line.

At exactly 8 PM, Susan returns back to the stage. Under the table cloth, Fiona reaches for Phil's hand. She squeezes her fingers as she listens to their mother introduce what the next hour of the night is about before passing off the mic to Courtney.

Courtney grins, winking at the twins. Fiona smiles, winking back. Courtney didn't have to make a speech, but she insisted until Phil gave in. Even though Fiona had only started properly talking to Courtney following her party, Fiona considers Courtney as one of her closest friends now.

"Thank you, Mrs. Lester." Courtney looks down at the audience. "And thank you, Phil and Fiona, for inviting me tonight. I know we haven't been good friends for very long, but I consider you as a second sister. I-" Courtney's body sways, "Since my party…" Her words slur. "We talked… and… and…"

The room is stunned by what happens next.

Courtney's fingers loosens its hold on the microphone. Her eyes flutter close, and in two seconds, her body crashes down to the floor.

* * *

 **The plan has been set into motion. How will this party end? What do you think the twins had planned? The next chapter will conclude the Lester twin's 18th birthday portion of IPY.**

 **I can't believe it has been a couple months since my last update! Truth be told, I've been putting a lot of hours into my on-campus job, so I'm usually exhausted by the time I get home and my brain isn't awake enough to do fanfic writing. I work from 10 AM to 3 PM from Mondays to Fridays for the rest of the summer. Then it takes me about an hour and a half max to ride a bus that takes me back home. Once I get home, I help my mom make dinner and by the time I'm done I'll be very tired and not feel like writing. But as soon as the weekend comes, I'm holed up on my tablet working on new chaps.**

 **Also, I'd bash Ian's head too for choosing to look for the boys alone without any leads. But lbr, if your best friend went missing and you're the type of person who makes irrational decisions, you'd likely do the same. Or at least that's what some people do in mystery novels.**

 **I'll try to update next week. I'll be back to school in two weeks, and once that happens, my update schedule will definitely be irregular compared to last year.**

 **˜ AA**


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